Jihun could hear his ragged breathing echoing through the night as his feet kept on running. The smell of his sweat mingled in with the scent of his salty tears as they poured down his face.

He hates this. He hates this feeling. He hates Seungjun for lying to him. He hates his aunt for making Seungjun lie to him. He hates his dad for coming back. But the person he hates the most right now is himself.

He hates himself for being weak.

The pitter-patter of his feet brought him to a place that he is all too familiar with. Before he knew it, he was standing in front of the door. The door of a man that had gave him so much happiness, only to make it come crashing down with so much force.

Flashback

“My fa-father? Ahjussi, I think it’s better if you just go home instead of spouting nonsense at my doorstep this late at night. I don’t even know you.”

“There is no reason for me to lie, Jihun-ah. I came back to atone for my past mistakes of leaving both you and your mother 21 years ago.”

‘N-no way ahjussi. M-my father would never come back after leaving,” Jihun was shaking in fear. There is just no way that this man is his dad. But he knew, deep in his heart, that he’s not able to deny that the man was his father any longer when their appearance was too strikingly similar. It was like looking at an older version of him.

“I’m sorry Jihun-ah. I really am sorry. If you would just listen to me, I’m not here to ask you to accept me back into your life…I’m just here to make up for my past mistakes.”

Now, here he was. Standing in front of Seungjun’s door. He hates himself for being weak. For being too dependent of Seungjun, even after he got lied to. Even after everything he had been through tonight, his heart still craves for Seungjun to comfort him by the end of the day. Jihun needs the warmth of the older man to help him through his pain, even if the pain was brought by the said man himself.

His feet shuffled as he contemplates to knock on the door. Jihun gathered as much courage as he could possibly muster before giving a small, yet definite, knock on the door. It hurts his pride, having to show up himself at the doors of this man, but he didn’t think he would be able to live if he didn’t do this.

One minute.

Two minute.

Three minute.

Jihun’s disappointment grew as the doors remained close.

He really does think of me as just a patient, Jihun thought as he slowly dragged his feet away. His eyes teared up again as his vision went blurry. Jihun was about to walk back towards the front lawn, when a familiar car drove up the driveway. He shielded his eyes from the glaring headlights as the driver side opened up.

“Jihun?”

Jihun froze as he heard the soothing voice. It was a really conflicting emotion. The voice enraged him, yet calm him down. It was like a fire lighting up in ice cold water.

The tall figure walked up to him, blocking his view from the shining light of his car. Seungjun stopped in front of Jihun. Jihun looked up and was shocked to see the other’s state. It had barely been a few hours since he left the other, but Seungjun looked as if he had seen the worst part of his life. His red eyes looked tired and sunken down, with evidence of dried tears trailing down his face. His lips were dry and chapped as he stared downwards at Jihun.

“Seungjun-hyung, I-, “Jihun started as the silent stare that Seungjun had ed upon him began to weigh him down with awkwardness. Though he could not finish his sentence, as Seungjun pulled him into his arms and embraced the other as tight as he possibly could, afraid that he would lose the younger again.

“I’m sorry Jihun. Yes, it was true that I received payment from your aunt to secretly be your psychiatrist but I have returned all the money back to your aunt because you are not just any patient Jihun-ah. You are someone special to me that I hol