Forgive me, I have sinned. Final short for KY/YD.  

She only lets him kiss her in the dark.

In some quiet, forgotten room in their large house, she lets him touch her and hold her the way he's always wanted to. Often it's in one of the guest rooms—ocassionally, it's in the storage closet, where the small, cramped space heightens the thrill and gets her sweating before they even really begun.

In the closet they turn on the single lightbulb that barely manages to illuminate the expression of pleasure on her face; Kim Yeol makes do with the lovely sounds that comes out of , those suggestive moans and long sighs gets his blood running hot, and he would replay those sounds over and over in his head once he's alone again in his own bed.

Yeon Doo is usually quiet—the fear and guilt of being caught usually had her biting her lip or muffling her screams against his shoulder—Yeol could feel it, but he also wants to hear her when she comes apart, but that would just be another thing on the list that was taken from him.

First was his mother, his childhood, and then the love of his life—the only woman that he's ever wanted. His sister.

So very close yet so unattainable.

Forgive me, I have sinned. 

Of course, she wasn't unattainable in the physical sense. Yeol was her first kiss, first everything and he would make damn sure that he would be her last. Even if she should ever get married, find a husband and have another man's children, he knew he could never leave her. She's a permanent fixture in his heart, an addiction that he could never get over. He would be the other man, the dirty little secret she would have to hide from her spouse, but if that's what it took to be a part of her life--he would take it with no second thoughts. He would be having an affair with a married person. Like mother, like son. 

But Yeol tries not to think about their future, of what it holds. Perhaps once they're old enough, maybe just maybe, they would run away together and he could have Yeon Doo all to himself. Only, he knows Yeon Doo would never even think about leaving her beloved mother no matter how much she wants him—wants a real life with him. Married, with children, just like every normal couple in the world.

But it would never be for as long as their parents has those rings around their fingers--rings that should've rightfully belong to them.

Or that's what he thinks.

Some part of him though, knew that he was being a hypocrite. At which part did he deserved to be with Yeon Doo? After all the terrible things he did. The terrible sins he made. Was making.

On the outside, Yeol was perfect. But inside he was flawed. He was petty. He could hold a grudge. He abused his power in school. He stooped to Soo Ah's level and tried to influence Yeon Doo to do the same. He remembered how he acted no different than the adults that he despised, and had the gall to get on his high horse and preach to Yeon Doo about doing the 'right' thing. Truthfully Yeol had no idea what's right and wrong anymore. Before, the only thing he had done right was be a loyal friend to Ha Joon... until he had managed to screw that up too.

And he was as selfish as his father, who would step on other people's happiness for his own. 

I claimed her first, was his reasoning. I saw her first. I wanted her first.

I need her. Ha Joon had said without actually saying it. She makes me want to live. She gives me purpose. She gives me strength. I had nothing in my life until her.

You had me, Yeol had thought silently. I'll do anything for you. But I can't let you have her.

And he had turned away before he could see the shattered look on his best friend's face.

Forgive me, I have sinned.

When his father gave him the news, he had never loathed the man more in his entire life. Yeon Doo searched him out that day, held his hand and asked him, “What do we do now?”

“I don't know.” He had said honestly, raising her knuckles to his lips so he could press a kiss on her cool skin, “But we'll stick together.”

Eyes shining, she had agreed.

Weeks later, while their parents were asleep in the master bedroom, Yeol knocked on her door and she invited him into her bed. 

She never bothered turning the lights on, and they undressed each other blindly with clumsy fingers. 

This is wrong, she had panted into his ear, while they held onto each other tightly, But don't stop.

Never, he growled and seconds later he had her arching her back and chanting his name as he whispered that he loved her, over and over again until the words were practically etched onto her skin.

I love you, too, she had said after, a tired but adoring smile on her face. He spent the night in her arms, staring at the outline of her face in the dark and listening to the steady sound of her breathing. He stayed until dawn broke and he had to sneak quietly back into his room.

The next morning they ate breakfast together like a family. Their parents never knew.

It was sickening. It was shameful. But it didn't stop them from doing it again, and again, and again.

Forgive us, we have sinned.

We're going to hell in a handbasket. 

But it's worth it. I would spend an enternity in suffering if I could have one night with you. 

Love makes us do crazy, stupid things. But what can we say? We're only human. We only live once.

We're young, wild and free.  

And if that makes us sinners, then so be it. 

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Word Count: 1000

so. this is an alternate ending with no sunshine and butterflies at the end of the rainbow but there is tons of light that some of you requested. you're welcome. 

title taken from the kings. obviously.