Jonghyun's life lost all color. He only saw grays, ignoring the burst of spring colors. It was truly pointless. The sun was insulting; it was the same shade as Taemin's hair and anything as green as Slytherin robes made his stomach lurch. It was as if  he was selectively colour blind, everything around him matched the concrete beneath his hands.
He wasn't sure how long he laid in the middle of the street but somehow his twin managed to find him and rescued him from the oncoming cars that would never come; a small part of Jonghyun wished they did come but he didn't dare dwell on it, for everyone's sake.
 Jonghyun was hysterical yet Kibum understood his wails of despair and held him; Kibum too felt like crying, it was unbearable to hear the story combined with his brother's face but he was the stronger twin, the protector and he needed to fulfill his duty as he had been doing since they were born.

At one point Jonghyun's voice simply left him, he was unable to screech anymore and his body went into shock. He was dragged back to his house and sat in his shower while Kibum forged a story about Taemin needing to leave early. Jonghyun let the water roll off him, it was scorching but he didn't seem to notice how his back was raw and stinging. Kibum had to dry and dress him, like he was a child again. They were still children after all. 
Jonghyun was too cocky and karma simply reminded him how foolish he really was, his life was too perfect, everything was going too well, it was too much and he didn't deserve it so it was taken from him. At least that's what he told himself.

His everything was taken away from him and because he was a child, he couldn't go after him; a scared child. He found Taemin's wand underneath his mattress hidden along with his own. He cursed himself, it was his fault. He was selfish for wanting a glimpse at a life neither of them could have.

Now his soulmate was snatched away by a psychotic killer and he wasn't sure if he would ever come back. He was always afraid of Taemin keeping secrets from him, he could feel the mental barricade Taemin constantly put up but now he wanted to remain ignorant. In those brief seconds Taemin's memories flashed before him, the stories, the hushed whispers, how a handsome fee would have to be paid in order to set the pureblood free. From what he knew about Taemin's parents, they wouldn't bother. 

That night he silently sobbed in Kibums arms until his eyes were swollen and bloodshot. He waited for Kibum to finally drift off so he could untangle himself. Jonghyun wasn't able to sleep, the idea of shutting his eyes made him shudder; he didn't want to be left alone in the dark but he was being selfish again, Taemin must be the scared one. He closed his eyes, accepting the darkness and to be left with his thoughts but there was nothing. 
It suddenly clicked, he didn't know how Taemin felt. His mind was blank and void of anything shared; he thought of the worst possible reason for it and had a full blown panic attack. It took one hour, one Kibum and two calming potions for him to return to his dead state. 

They were able to contact Jinki via owl and by the morning his request to speak to the two in person came through however only Kibum went to explain what happened for Jonghyun  refused to speak entirely. It would be a waste of words that held no meaning. 

Through body language he requested that he be left alone in his room, flipping through his leather back book and skimming over his lyrics. Everything was pathetic and shameful, his art was juvenile; too bright and too euphoric, even the songs where he expressed his dejection it was nothing compared to the emptiness he felt now. Roo scurried toward him, whimpering and nuzzling him as she buried her way into his arms but Jonghyun didn't respond, he simply waited for Kibum to find him shivering in the corner of the room.
He placed Taemin's ring on his hand as to not loose it but he felt the urge to fling it out the window and out of sight, it was a reminder of Taemin, of what happened. But once again, it was selfish.

He was reverting back to his old self and the only one who could help him was currently missing, or worse, dead. 
All the while Kibum and Jinki were having a very uncomfortable yet necessary conversation.

"I see" Jinki stared down at his lap, he agreed to meet Kibum in a public park, not too far from the twin's home. Kibum tried to explain what happened to the best of his ability but there were holes in the story that only Jonghyun could fill. The entire situation made Kibum queasy; he remembered Zitao warning him of the storm that was coming and everything was happening right underneath his nose. Kibum prided himself on being nosy and involved in all gossip around Hogwarts but this was spread far beyond petty gossip, this involved people's lives, what truly mattered yet he didn't even know.

"Kibum" Jinki voiced made him snap out of his psyche. "I don't want your brother to take the blame for this" but it was already too late for that. "It's my fault, so I shall take responsibility. I appreciate you telling me but I have already received his ransom letter; so if you will excuse me" before Kibum could even give his condolences Jinki apparated into thin air. 
Kibum grudgingly walked back home, he began to pack both of their trunks, they would be leaving for Hogwarts again soon as Easter had already passed and April was fast approaching.
He could clearly see Jonghyun in the corner but didn't address him directly instead he mumbled while folding their school robes. 

"our birthday is coming up. Is there anything you want?"
He expected to drown in silence but Jonghyun's small voice cut through like a knife "I want Taemin back" 

*

During the night Jonghyun wasn't able to sleep and he returned to his zombie like state of drifting off during the day, and the Hogwarts express was the perfect place for a nap. He was curled up by the window with Minho and Kibum sitting across from him. It was easy to explain to Minho what happened and he truly was sympathetic. Minho always dreamt of Taemin mysteriously leaving the picture and having to pick up the pieces left behind but now that he was really gone he felt sick; he couldn't take advantage of Jonghyun during a time like this. 

He also thought of Kibum, he couldn't just drop him because his preferred twin is suddenly alone (due to unfortunate circumstances) that wouldn't be fair to either of them and if he was being honest, Minho enjoyed having Kibum around. Although Kibum was loud, obnoxious and condescending on occasion, he held a special place in Minho's heart.
For the time being he needed to push his feelings for Jonghyun aside and be a friend.

Jonghyun was jolted awake by a dream that immediately left his memory. He sat dazed and confused before remembering his surroundings and returning to his dismal state of mind while Kibum and Minho idly talked amongst themselves.
Jonghyun saw them and briefly felt happiness; he could see the blossoming of feelings between the two and it reminded him of when Taemin and him were tip toeing around their own feelings. The harsh reality set in that those days were over.

Hogwarts was just as dull, many asked him about Taemin's disappearance but his silence sent them to Kai and Krystal and their answers were a rather crude "it's none of your ing business!" 

At dinner Jonghyun completely lost his appetite and without a word left the great hall, leaving his friends behind but they didn't go after him, only one unlikely shell of person followed him. Jonghyun tried to ignore his paranoia but the clacking of heels behind him made him spin around to face Jessica Jung. He jumped slightly at her appearance, she resembled him with dark circles under her eyes and ghastly pale skin. 
She frowned and grabbed Jonghyun's wrist, pulling him in the opposite direction towards the Slytherin dungeons; Jonghyun tried to struggle out of her grip but she tugged his arm and snapped at him.

"I want them back as much as you do so just follow me! I have a plan"