"Where's Taemin?" Jonghyun ran up to Kai and Kibum the moment they entered the great hall. They both looked extremely worn out, as if neither of them slept the night before. Even Kibum had dark circles under his eyes that couldn't be hidden by makeup; at least now he slightly resembled his twin. "Pretty boy had a really rough night" Kai rubbed his eyes and led the twins to the Slytherin table where Krystal was already sat. The anxiety was eating away at Jonghyun, he saw what happened last night, the moment he shut his eyes he was into a dream that wasn't his own. He could still hear the screaming, Taemin screaming his name, begging for help but he was unable to do anything. "Even in dreams I'm useless" he thought to himself; "what happened?" Jonghyun wanted to know the every detail after Taemin woke up.

 

"He had a night terror, woke up screaming which woke us all up; we all tried to calm him down but he wouldn't stop crying. He's not sick or anything but he's not going to lessons either, he needs to rest" Kai grudgingly ate his breakfast and Kibum continued for him "he refuses to speak now and he doesn't want to see anyone"

"Not even me?" Jonghyun asked, a little hurt. He felt a dull ache in his heart and he knew that Taemin needed him, perhaps he would be an exception. Kibum shook his head "I don't think you'd want to see him in this state either" 

 

Jonghyun's heart dropped. Kibum seemingly sensed his distress "don't worry, you two can never stay away from each other for long, you'll see him later" 

Jonghyun took comfort in that and tried to continue on with day; Taemin never leaving his mind.

 

*

 

 The moment his dorm mates left him, Taemin took the opportunity to roll out of bed and wallow in self pity; Dried tear tracks on his cheeks. He was used to night terrors as a child but they were filled with monsters and beasts, as a teenager he could easily protect himself from any vampire or centaur with magic but this was much different, he was afraid of his parents. He was afraid of being unloved and he couldn't protect himself, it was a fear that was always there but he's repressed it for so long and Jonghyun unintentionally reminded him. Jonghyun's perfect family, a loving mother and father; they both had doting brothers but Jinki just wasn't enough sometimes despite his futile attempts at raising Taemin. 

 

No matter how much Jinki nagged, he wasn't a motherly figure. No matter how stern Jinki could be, he wasn't a fatherly figure. He was a brotherly figure that couldn't be replaced or replicated. Taemin had always been grateful for Jinki but nothing could replace a mothers love or a fathers pride. 

 

It was no ones fault but his own. He was the spoilt, second child that they never wanted and instead of making use of himself he caused trouble simply for the attention that he never received. Was it too much to ask? Was he being selfish? The inner conflict proved to be too much and in Taemin's vulnerable mind he thought it best to ask a simply question, confront his parents in the form of a letter. A letter asking a simple but complex question that could perhaps  give him the closure he needs. "Are you proud to call me your son?" he scribbled the question on a piece of parchment, he etched his signature in the corner and rushed to the owlery; wrapped in a cloak so no passing student could tell he hadn't bothered to change out of his pyjamas. 

 

Perhaps he was overreacting, there were teenagers with far worse parents in impoverished situations, there were parents that were physically and verbally abusive but the silence was just as painful. To Taemin, the neglect hurt just as much. 

 

He could feel worry flow through him and tried his hardest not to break down again. Jonghyun was the emotional one, not him. He's seen Jonghyun cry all too often because of his actions, his rage, his jealously. He couldn't stand the idea of Jonghyun crying over this. Jonghyun was so oblivious to his family anyway, such tears would be wasted. Taemin has kept up his cool facade for so long he was unsure how else to act. His uncaring demeanour prohibited him from showing any weakness and although his entire being made it nearly impossible to hide from Jonghyun, he was still going to try. Jonghyun deserved that much.

 

He crept up the stairs to the owlery and although there was no longer any ice, puddles from previous rain caused him to slip multiple times.

He whistled and his personal owl came and perched on his shoulder. He placed the spare bit of parchment in its beak and command it to fly to the Lee manor. 

 

It was morning and there was no doubt in Taemin's mind that the reply would arrive before dinner. 

 

So he waited. 

 

And waited. 

 

For hours.

 

 he skipped breakfast and lunch but he ignored his growling stomach and alternated between pacing and slumping against the walls of the owlery, it was drafty and he shivered when a strong wind blew past. It only became worse when the sun began to set and then heating jinxes were used. 

Taemin pointed his wand at his hand and whispered "Flagration" he was instantly warm and rubbed his hands together to spread the incantation.

 

Taemin concentrated on this heat and not his location. Lessons have since finished and he knew Jonghyun would try to go looking for him, he wanted to see Jonghyun but not in this state. His eyes were red, droopy and dark circles surrounded them. His hair was limp and slightly greasy, and his skin was blotched. He looked better when he was in the hospital wing with burns and cuts from Jessica. He wasn't the "fairy prince" Jonghyun referred to him as and he couldn't stand it. He was lucky there was no quidditch practice that day otherwise he'd have more than a concerned boyfriend on his hands.

 

Mid thought, talons dug into his shoulder; not hard enough to break skin but hard enough to capture his attention. It was his owl and with it a small piece of folded parchment. He stood up and paced again, the content of a small piece parchment could determine the future for his non existent relationship with his parents. He thought of the worse case scenario in the form of a "no" and the best case in a "yes" he expected nothing more and nothing less from the blunt Lees. 

 

But what he wasn't prepared for what he saw. His own writing staring back at him, mocking him. He was wrong, this was the worse case scenario. No answer at all. 

 

He wasn't even deserving of a one word answer, they completely ignored him. They only spoke to him in public, at galas and parties; when he was convenient but any other time he was a bother, a burden, that wasn't worthy of even a second of their time.

He crumpled the parchment and threw it out of the tower, fleeing the scene. unable to stop the tears.