– 14: WRONG –

song: hi.ni - i can't have you (taehyung theme)

I was just trying to catch my tail as I suddenly shifted and ended up lying in the middle of the floor. At least Seyoung didn’t have to see this. She’s probably coming upstairs any second. ‘I don’t want you to walk around the apartment ’ or something, that’s what her slight annoyance and embarrassment literally screamed every time I was in front of her. How her cheeks blushed, how she just turned violent without any valid reason, yeah, that’s Seyoung.

Quickly running to the wardrobe, I picked out the buttoned blue pyjamas she bought for me recently on our way home and did my best to do the buttons properly. Still recalling her face when she had to button up my shirt on the day of the ball. 

Why wasn’t she coming? 

Me trying to deal with buttons took at least half a century but there still wasn’t any sign of Seyoung. Not even footsteps in the staircase. 

I walked to the broken window and peeked out, just to see how there were small dots of white fluttering down from the sky. Big, fluffy dots. 

Without any further hesitation, I ran down the stairs without any shoes on into the snow and reached my arms out into the air, trying to catch some. But as soon as they met my skin, they melted into droplets of water.

“Seyoung, look there are small dots falling from the sky!” I shouted into the dark alleyway, knowing that she was around here somewhere because I shifted. “Seyoung!”

I waited for a response but there was nothing. Nothing except… the sound humans make when they cry.

“Seyoung?” 

I quickly walked into the direction of the sound but she came towards me just in that very moment. Her jacket was widely open and I was asking myself if she wasn’t freezing because she always, always, felt cold. Even in the dark light, I saw that her face was still wet, though she must have tried to wipe the tears away before. Her eyes were red and her nose was running, her lips cracked from the cold, her body trembling.

“Are you okay?” I asked as she stopped just a few steps away from me.

Seyoung let out a small laughter before pursing her lips before pausing and shaking her head. I saw how her feigned smile faded from her lips and how her eyes leaked again, tears trickling down her red cheeks. 

“No,” she said weakly and tried to smile while crying.

My heart felt weak too, having to see her like this. Seyoung, who used to be so strong and bossy, who scolded me on a daily basis, being suddenly so fragile and sad. 

Her lips trembled as she tried to calm her breath and then, Seyoung just walked towards me and buried her face in my chest. I felt her cold fingers crumpling the fabric at the back of my shirt, how her tears stained it.

She just leant onto me and cried because of whatever must have happened with Jimin.

I felt how my hand suddenly held onto the back of her head, the other curling around her waist, as she sobbed silently. And I felt sad. Because she felt sad. 

I had no idea how long we have been standing there like this but after a while, Seyoung calmed down and her sobs became silent. I felt bad for her. I didn’t know what to do. At times like this, I wish I was more human.

“I’m sorry about your shirt,” she said as she poked my wet shirt at the chest with her index finger, letting out a heartwarming laughter. A genuine laughter.

“Eh, it’s nothing,” I said, still holding onto her shoulders with both of my hands as Seyoung successfully avoided all the eye contact I tried to make.

“Let’s go inside, I’m freezing,” she said before sniffing and wiping her cheeks with the sleeve of her jacket. 

She acted as if nothing happened. 

Don’t humans talk about this? If not, then humans are simply weird.

As we went upstairs, I notice that my feet were still wet from the snow but I wasn’t feeling cold at all. However, Seyoung was freezing, no matter how much she tried to hide her trembling hands in her pockets. She dropped her jacket without hanging it up and spent one and a half hour in the bathroom before coming out, looking completely drained. Her eyes were still red. And she was still sniffing.

“You’re cold,” I said as she buried herself under the blanket but she didn’t respond as she laid there with her face turned away.

Without any other word, I wrapped my arm around her. I expected resistance, her kicking me off the bed, her screaming my ears off, her punching me in the ribs. But there was nothing. 

She let me.

* * *

I was lying awake almost the whole night, staring at her. I could sense that she wasn’t sleeping much either but she surely wasn’t able to see me looking at her in this pitch black room