"Now that you've already seen a variety show recording, today you guys will be learning about, and experiencing, the meet and greet process that often occurs backstage while idols are promoting." Our variety teacher said. Suddenly everyone started talking excitedly all at once, the auditorium filling with the rumble of voices.

For today's variety lesson, we ended up meeting up with the EXO members again so they could be our models and show us their ways...which also meant that I couldn't avoid him today. The thought of that put a nervous flutter in my stomach, but I tried to resist the urge to look for him among the crowd.

"This part is very essential if you want to have a good impression on the other idol groups. I'm sure you've all heard stories about certain idol groups saying they don't have any celebrities friends. Well that's exactly what you're trying to avoid. Fans love seeing their beloved idols interacting with other idols, such as doing collaborations, going to parties together, or choosing each other for various surveys." 

I had to admit that it did sound exciting, but nerve-wracking all the same. As long as I didn't have to demonstrate anything this time, I guess it would be quite fun to watch.

"Come over here, Kris and Chanyeol," The teacher said, and then the two extremely tall rappers walked to the front of the crowd, naturally flowing with charisma. Our auditorium was large, looking like it could be used for any purpose, even filming the typical SM music videos.

"Okay, since Kris is an English speaker, we can have some fun here. Chanyeol, how about you pretend you're another English speaker from a different group, and you guys meet backstage at Inkigayo." The variety teacher suggested, directing them to their positions, facing the audience. Some trainees immediately started giggling and whispering when they heard that he would have to speak in English. 

"Uh, okay then," the tall guy, Kris, said in English nonchalantly, shrugging.

It immediately perked my interest, as this was finally something I could understand without the help of my in-ear translator. They got into their positions at the opposite ends of the makeshift stage, walking towards each other while bowing deeply.

"Hey wassup man!" Kris reached out his hand, meeting Chanyeol's in a unique handshake that made it look like they've been friends for a while. "Your new comeback song is really awesome and you guys are doing an amazing job."

The other rapper just stood there looking uncertain at first, with his giant, wide eyes, no doubt that it was because he didn't fully understand what Kris had said in English. "Gomawo, uhh, thank you, thank you... I like you too." He flashed a cheesy smile at the audience, revealing rows of straight white teeth, then the soft roar of laughter took over the entire room.

"Yes, thank you guys. So that's a good example of what you would do on a variety show; just try to make people laugh naturally." The manager said, smiling, as he patted Kris and Chanyeol on the back. "Improvisation is a very important skill to have; not just for variety, but even while performing, sometimes you might run into problems or surprising situations that you wouldn't think about.

"Anyway, now you guys get to try it. Quickly form groups of three, everyone!" The teacher shouted over the noise of everyone talking at once, causing my in-ear translator to buzz annoyingly. 

There was one face that popped into my mind first when thinking about who to form a group with...but I pushed that thought aside. Instead, I stood at the side of the auditorium, figuring that waiting for people who also didn't have groups to come along would be easiest. A while later, Minnie came out of the crowd in the middle and stood at the side as well, a few feet away from me. I was surprised that she didn't naturally go to--

"Yoonmi!" A voice floated over from nearby, and I looked up to see Luhan waving at me from the crowd in the center. He started walking over in my direction, but soon disappeared as he was dragged back into the crowd by another EXO member.

I scanned the large group of people, trying to see who ended up in what group, but all I could see was a giant mob in the center, the trainees all wanting to be in a group with certain members of EXO. They started playing rock paper scissors to fairly determine who would get the spot.

"Aniyaaaa!" A familiar loud voice cut through the other conversations in the room, probably from losing the game. I glanced over to see Chen reluctantly walking to the side where Minnie and I were standing, my chest doing flip-flops restlessly. 

I had been actively avoiding him for over a week, besides seeing him at the one short theory session we had, where we hadn't talked much anyway. If he had noticed my distance, he hadn't said anything, but instead, we had both been fairly quiet. Today, the sight of him immediately caused my pulse to speed up again. His hair was styled up today, a change from how I've usually seen it, and when paired with an all-black outfit, he looked super chic.

I wasn't sure what I had been hoping for or expecting exactly, but just that maybe after all that happened between us, maybe he would consider forming a group with me? But to be fair, why would he, when we had barely talked all week? When I was avoiding him all week?

But at the same time, I couldn't help but feel like all our experiences together...seemed special. Maybe I was just thinking too much; I'm still just another trainee after all.  And maybe that's why my heart sank a bit when I saw that it was indeed Chen that lost the first match of rock paper scissors, and was then forced to be in my group since we needed another person. 

Although I did find it strange that he didn't just form a group with Minnie in the first place.

He gave me a little smile, no more than one given to a stranger walking by. I couldn't read his face at all; his eyes were guarded, cautious almost, like he was holding himself back.

It was so unlike anything I've seen of him before, and it hurt.

He then came up and stood a couple of metres beside me. Minnie walked quickly towards to us, and her face immediately became animated as she started talking in Korean with Chen. 

I slowly backed away from them, feeling very uncomfortable just being there. With my in-ear translator turned off temporarily, I couldn't understand anything as they talked on, seeming to get closer both in distance.

I turned my attention back to the center of the room, where I observed as the other groups got together. Miyoung and the guy she was flirting with the guy from the other day, Kai, got into a group with another girl from the other top tier group, and D.O, Jiwoo, and Hyojin formed a group. All the groups had two trainees and one EXO member, but another girl was lucky and formed a group with two EXO members. 

From the corner of my eye, I saw Minnie and Chen clutching their stomachs as they laughed, appearing to have a very good time. He then leaned over closely to whisper something into her ear. 

"Yah, Kim Jongdae!" She turned to him, raising her hand to hit him, but he was faster, and swiftly ran away. She chased after him, the two of them dodging between the crowds.

I left out a small sigh of relief when my in-ear translator buzzed to life as the teacher resumed the lesson.

"Okay guys, quiet down. Today with your group, you will be acting out situations that you are given. These setting of these situations will take place backstage or in the change rooms at music shows, but each group's situation and meeting will be different. Okay, now an EXO member and a trainee from each group, please step forward." The teacher directed. In my group, Chen and Minnie were already near the front, from where they had stopped running, so they were going to act out this situation, I supposed.

"Okay, here is the situation: you two have been recently caught up in a huge scandal, and the media has been blowing up about both of you, even though your companies have both denied it. Now you two finally meet backstage when both of your groups are promoting. What do you do?" 

My mind went blank as I tried to think of what I would do, but Minnie was glowing as she seemed to get even more excited. Since she was also near the front of the crowd with Chen, the teacher told them to present first. 

"Hello," Minnie greeted hesitantly, pretending to be a bit awkward as she bowed deeply.

"Hello," Chen said back, also a bit embarrassed.

The two seemed unsure of what to say as they held each other's stares for a while, then burst into laughter, also making the audience laugh. 

"It's an honour to be in a scandal with you actually," Minnie said cheerfully.

"Yeah, I feel the same way. One's career wouldn't be that interesting without having a scandal once in a while." Chen said, shrugging it off nonchalantly.

Minnie laughed brightly in response, taking it as encouragement. "Hmm, imagine the huge plot twist if we actually started going out." She twirled a strand of her long hair, thinking. "Hey, maybe it's not such a bad idea." She suggested with a smirk on her lips.

"Cut!" The teacher said, quickly stopping them. "Don't get there yet guys, we still have the next scenario to do!"

I breathed out a sigh of relief, not even realizing that I had been holding my breath this entire time. It was extremely short lived once I heard the teacher's next words though.

"Okay, now can we have the other trainee in your group step up to do the next scene?"

My insides twisted at the thought of not only performing in front of an audience again, but it'd have to be with him. The only good part would be that we could least we could speak in the same language. 

"Okay, here is the next scenario that Chen will do with Yoonmi. You two have been bumping into each other backstage for a while, and now you both want to get to know each other even better. What do you do?" 

I walked forward to where Chen was standing, and bowed, greeting him in Korean. He bowed and greeted back in Korean. 

"How have you been?" I asked, switching over to Chinese. I wasn't sure how the others were going to understand us, but that was probably for the best anyway.

"Everything's been great! How have you been? Your group's new album is amazing." He grinned cutely, his eyes forming crescents as the corners of his lips curled up.

"Oh really, you think so? Thanks," I smiled, "I really love your title track!" Remembering what the teacher said about improvisation, I then attempted to dance a few steps to one of EXO's songs, which brought out a few laughs from the audience.

"Wow you're good!" Chen chuckled as well, clapping a few times. My heart throbbed at how much I've actually missed his melodic laughter, sounding golden like wind chimes.

I wasn't sure how exactly to continue from there, so we ended up standing there silently for a bit, just glancing at each other uncertainly.
I couldn't stand the silence anymore; not when there was a whole audience was waiting for us, watching me embarrass myself, so I used the first thing that came to my mind.

"I'm so glad that...your group is promoting now." I squeaked shyly. My heart thumped rapidly in my chest as I felt the heat rush to my face. I knew this was just acting but... did this suddenly seem really real? 

"I'm glad too," he said softly, stepping forward. He reached for my hands gently, pulling me closer. His hands were soft, comforting as they fit with mine so nicely. I looked up at him, surprised, unsure of the extent of his acting. Why wasn't the variety teacher stopping us yet?

"Rachel, I really like you." His kind eyes met mine, but I quickly lowered my gaze, not wanting to see what would only hurt me more. I could only hear the blood rushing through my ears, drowning out even the hush of the distant audience. I vaguely noticed that he used my real name instead of my stage name that I was supposed to use for this scenario. 

Then he gently tilted my chin up and made me look straight at him.

This time he wasn't holding back.

His eyes weren't guarded; none of that blank, cold, slate I had seen earlier. Like a clear solution, a door unlocked, there was so much to see, yet, at a glance, nothing at all. The tenderness, adoration...pain. It was intermittent, barely there like a frequency just on the edge of the visible spectrum, flashes in a change blindness test.

And just after that brief second I caught his eyes, he slowly dropped his gaze. I swallowed nervously, almost forgetting to answer him.
"I-I like you too," I managed to whisper. He leaned closer, gently cupping my face with his hands that felt cool against my flushed cheeks. My gaze slowly dropped as I found myself gradually closing my eyes. 

It could've been the acting on a set, real life where sparks fly, or simply a floating dream trapped within the unconscious mind.

I didn't know, I didn't want to know, didn't want to wake up.

But before flowers can bloom in the dark, before the prince falls in love with the mermaid, before my own hopes take flight, a voice broke the magical moment like a bucket of cold water. 

"Jongdae-ya!" A deep voice shouted, followed by a sentence in Korean, sounding very surprised.

I immediately jumped back as my cheeks heated up even more. Chanyeol was standing beside us, his eyes even bigger than usual, with shock.

"Ah, sorry, sorry," he said as he pretended to close the dressing room door and leave. 

"Okay, cut!" The variety teacher finally said. "See guys, this is what you call good acting. Although they sort of strayed away from their scenario, the acting was absolutely amazing; very realistic." 

I felt my heart drop slightly at his words although it was a compliment. Was it really just acting? I wasn't sure anymore. But maybe I just saw what I wanted to see...

The crowd clapped loudly, the EXO members shouting out Chanyeol's name, jokingly congratulating him for interrupting us. I quickly walked to the back of the room, eager to get away from all the stares. I felt so embarrassed since I had forgotten there was an entire room full of people watching us. 

As I walked, I felt two pairs of eyes on my back. One was a gentle gaze, concerned, and the other was a filled with cold fire, piercing through the back of my head.

It'd probably be best to continue avoiding him.

Another one of the first chapters I wrote for this LOL
Are y'all still alive though