My super late one shot birthday gift for Ghe~~ As promised, here it goes…  ^^

“Don’t go.”

Who would’ve thought that it will be my most used phrase rather than saying “I love you” and other sweet stuff to my special someone. I never really thought about it and it’s killing me slowly yet deeply.

If you really love someone, then you must support him in everything he does- and I’ve been living that life since I started dating him. We were just dating for a month when he decided to audition for Show Me the Money 4. At first I was sad but it was his dream and I want everyone to discover and appreciate his talents just like me. And it also means that his schedule will be packed and he will no longer stay that long with me in our dorm- in our room.

“I’m going to miss you.”

“Don’t say that. As if I’m entering the military or heaven with your words. I will go home here.”

“But the dorm will never be the same again.”

“I know.”

I may sound selfish but I only want him for myself but we need to do this- he needs to do this because he wanted to do so.

“Well, you need to do your best there. Prove them that you can!”

“I will do my best, for you.”

The following day, I woke up with some rustling sounds and saw Mino preparing to leave for the auditions. I decided to watch over him without him knowing that I’m awake. When he’s done, I closed my eyes as he sat on the floor by the bedside to kiss me in the forehead and whispered:

“I’ll be back. Sweet dreams.”

 A few rustle and a click of the door and he’s gone. I reached over his pillow and kissed it. This journey will be a long and sad one.

“Please don’t go…”

It’s been a year and I never really thought that we made it- people noticed his talent and I endured those long days waiting for him. But those days were so worth it everytime he’ll go back home and tell about his battles and raps to us while having dinner and after that we’ll sleep together and he’ll cuddle me so tight it’s hard for me to breathe but I don’t really mind because I also missed his warmth.

But, there’s a saying that…

We must not get used of something for a long time for it might disappear again little by little.

Around July, he will go to the studio alone and will go back around midnight looking very exhausted. After his shower I decided to talk to him.

“Are you hiding something Mino-ssi?”

“What do you mean?”

“You always go the studio and record songs alone, without anyone from our members. What’s keeping you busy?”

“It’s a surprise.”

“Are you having a solo track coming?”

“Aish~ I really want to hide this but I know you, you have a very powerful telepathy.”

“Really? When are you going to release it?”

“Very soon.”

“I will support you.”

“You always do that and I’m always thankful for that. But…”

“But what?”

“I will be gone again, a couple of months I guess.”

“Why?”

“I will promote my solo song but it’s also a sub-unit with Bobby and I have to be their guest for their Japan tour.”

“Not again~!”

“Don’t be sad. I will only be gone on the weekends, but I’ll be here during weekdays.”

“But weekends are like the only time where we can stay here all day and cuddle!”

“Jinwoo-hyung~”

I don’t know what emotion I experienced that I just stormed out of his room and shut myself in my room to cry. A few moments later, I heard some knocks and I know it was him.

“Please open the door and let’s talk.”

I didn’t respond and just cry. I’ve been needing him these days because I’m feeling down and I need someone’s presence to talk to and now that he has to leave again hurts me.

“Please Jinwoo-hyung, open the door…”

I know I’m just acting like a teenager and I’m hurting him but I’ve been hurt as well and felt like I was left alone. Everything was different when he first left us for SMTM and I’ve endured that much and now that it will happen again, I don’t know how I’m going to endure the further pain. I cried for too long that made me fall asleep, while hearing a few knocks and his deep voice.

“Please don’t leave me alone!”

I woke up the following day with stung red eyes and zero energy to get up and work. I peeked at the door only to find him sleeping on the floor.

“This bastard! He forgot that he has a bed to sleep with.”

I was about to pick him up when I heard another door being opened and I quickly locked myself inside again and slowly sat on the floor. I heard someone’s footsteps and a grunt as if he’s carrying something heavy. A few minutes passed, I decided to peek again and saw Seunghoon carrying Mino back in his room. I decided to close the door again and went back to bed as I mutter my silent thanks to him. Maybe I just need more time to think properly.

Weeks passed like that. He already shot a music video and Seungyoon told me that it will be a rated one, to which I’m no longer surprised with.

“I visited him on the site and he’s shooting a very hot video with a y woman. Aren’t you jealous Jinwoo-hyung?”

“Why would I?”

“That’s why I adore you hyung! You’re very sassy at times.”

“I’m learning from Taehyun.”

“But how are you and Mino-yah? Are you okay?”

“I still need more time to think.”

“He will start to promote next week and it also means that he’ll leave for the tour. It’s not good to see him leave knowing that you’re not in good terms.”

“I acted like a whiny girl in front of him and I’m embarrassed. I don’t know how I’m going to face him again after that.”

“He loves you and he just needs to see you before he left. You are his blanket and he needs you right now.”

“I don’t think this is the right time to talk to him.”

“I will not force you. We all saw your pain when Mino joined SMTM last year and now that it will kinda happen again, it worries us hyung. You need to be strong.”

“I need him.”

“We are here for you. You can share your problems to us. You used to do that before when Mino’s not yet in our team, you can do that again. And you endured so much during our trainee days. Don’t let this matter eat you up.”

“Thank you Seungyoon-ah.”

“Just remember that we’re always here for you hyung, we are a family okay?”

A week passed…

I was waiting patiently for a group of men to come inside. It’s making me nervous- first, this will be our first conversation after a couple of weeks and second, I’m afraid that other people might recognize me and I don’t want to create some chaos. Some few random thinking and I saw some girls rushing somewhere and there I saw him walking and looking so tired. I watched him move lifelessly, did he start to move like that since we had a misunderstanding? He started walking and was about to disappear when…

“Please don’t go…”

He slowly looked for the voice and when he saw it, he carefully approached it.

He carefully approached me!

I was getting more nervous but the tears in my eyes started falling down and my vision of him got blurry. I was thankful that I’m on a safe space and no one can see us.

“Why are you here?”

Then a hug- the warmth that I’ve been missing for so long, I felt it again. It feels so surreal and I don’t want to let go.

“I’m so sorry.”

“You don’t have to; it’s me who has to apologize.”

“No! I acted wrongly and didn’t talk to you for weeks. I’m really sorry.”

“Stop crying please.”

His thumb slowly grazed on my face as he wiped the tears on my eyes.

“I guess it’s time for you to leave. Take care.”

“You want me to leave, huh?”

“You have no idea how much I miss you but you need to do this, we need to do this. If I have to endure more days without you by my side but knowing that you’re achieving your dreams, I will be okay on that. I will wait for you just like what I’ve been doing before.”

“Thank you for understanding everything and I’m going to miss you.”

“Don’t act like you’re entering the military or somewhere with clouds and angels. Fighting~”

His face moved dangerously close to mine and I moved even closer to taste his lips. It was a sweet kiss and no one wants to break it but we need to part for air.

“You have to move now or you’ll be left here.”

“I don’t mind it as long as I’m with you.”

“But I don’t want to be the reason why your flight got delayed. And besides, no one knows that I’m here.”

“I appreciated your efforts to come over here.”

“I love you Song Mino.”

“And I love you even more. See you on Monday, and you better prepare yourself.”

“Prepare myself for what?”

He just winked his eye and I finally got what he’s trying to imply.