Amber’s POV

 

 

 

 

One week later

 

 

I heard her before I saw her and when I lifted my head, a lithe body came barreling into me like a freight train. Her squeals were barely swallowed by the discord of cheers and yells projecting from the bleachers. The left-over adrenaline that still lingered in my system coupled with the presence of the love of my life rendered me breathless. 

 

 

Krystal pulled away just enough for me to see the pure devotion in her eyes. 

 

 

“Congratulations, stupid. How does it feel to score the winning goal?”

 

 

“Eh, a little anticlimactic honestly. I was expecting a bigger rush.”

 

 

“Really?”

 

 

“No. I feel ing amazing right now.”

 

 

She giggled and jumped into my arms, her hold on me tightening when I started spinning us around. My ears were being deafened by her shrill expletives but I continued to swing us in a dizzying mess of limbs until I felt her face buried into my neck. My legs soon gave out, as I was already exhausted from the past three hours of game time, and I dropped to the grass with her falling on top of me.

 

 

“Ugh, Amber! My jeans are all muddy.” She whined but stayed on top of me with a pout.

 

 

I smirked and squeezed her thigh, “But princess, I thought you liked getting down and dirty with me, if last night was any indication.” I purred and wiggled my eyebrows.

 

 

Her eyes widened and she looked around to see if anyone had heard, her cheeks glowing a bright pink. I burst out in laughter at that and she started hitting me before her head fell onto my chest.

 

 

“Since when were you the cocky one in this relationship.” She mumbled against me.

 

 

“Since I found out you were a pillow queen.” 

 

 

I yelped when she harshly pinched me on the side and I had to pull her back down when she made to leave, “I’m kidding baby, come back to me,” I laughed and held her tight when she relented and stayed put.

 

 

“You’re an idiot.”

 

 

“Who’s dating the idiot though?” I smirked when she grunted noncommittally. 

 

 

Amidst the celebratory uproar and nonsensical chanting, the only thing that I could concentrate on was her. It wasn’t that she was stealing my attention away from the glory and the choir of praises that awaited me, because it isn’t stealing if I've already surrendered myself so irrevocably and completely to her. 

 

 

She pushed the hair out of my face, “You should go celebrate with everyone else.”

 

 

“I’m not thinking about anyone else right now.” I replied earnestly, getting lost in a sea of deep brown.

 

 

“Oh yeah? What are you thinking about right now then?” She whispered, her breath ghosting over my face. I shuddered in the most delightful of ways.

 

 

“I’m thinking about how badly I want everyone else to disappear so that I can have you all to myself.”

 

 

“Not a bad idea, but I suppose I could settle for something else instead.” She hummed, drawing her face closer to mine.

 

 

“And what is that?” I asked softly.

 

 

She didn’t answer and pulled me into a searing kiss.

 

 

 

~

 

 

 

I peeled my eyes open at the sound of heavy metal music blasting from my phone. 

 

 

My hand shot out and I haphazardly tried to find the device with no such luck. I groaned and sat up to search for it. Eventually, after grumbling out a series of curse words that may not have even been invented yet, I crawled under the bed only to find it stuffed inside a sock.

 

 

I was trying to remember how it got down here when my screen lit up to reveal a text from Krystal.

 

 

‘I just finished my jog. Your sleepy better be up and at my front door in 10.’

 

 

My heart did a funny leap when she sent another text with an emoji blowing a kiss.

 

 

It that instant I was reminded about the dream that I was having before being so rudely interrupted and my face fell. 

 

 

This wasn’t the first time that I’ve had a dream like that. 

 

 

It was just the first time that I didn’t freak out and lose my over it.

 

 

As I lay there beneath my bed, next to an empty soda can that I drank last night and bits of tissue paper scattered around me, I was forced to admit to myself something that I had been denying for longer than I realized.

 

 

Sighing heavily in resignation, I ran a hand over my face.

 

 

 

 

 

“.”

 

 

---

 

 

“Amber.…”

 

 

“Llama….”

 

 

“Oi Liu Yiyun!”

 

 

A sharp tap to my face brought me out of my musings and I turned to the right to glare at the offender. Sulli was looking at me with an odd look and at her brief glance to a certain someone sitting a few rows in front, I instantly grew worried at the possibility of having been caught staring at her.

 

 

Ah hell, was I doing it again?

 

 

“Why did you pencil-slap me and why are you looking at me like that?” I hissed at her in the lowest volume I could manage.

 

 

“I should be asking you that question, don’t you think? What were you staring at just now?” She asked back in the same tone, looking almost accusatory at me.

 

 

I swallowed loudly and became defensive, “Nobody! I mean, uh, nothing. I wasn’t staring at anything.”

 

 

“Is there something you wanted to share with the class, Ms. Liu?” Mr. Kang asked me expectantly.

 

 

I groaned internally when the rest of the class turned in their seats to look at me. 

 

 

“No, sir. Just a bug that’s bothering me is all.” I heard a scoff from beside me at that. 

 

 

Krystal had her head turned as well and when I caught her eyes, she raised an eyebrow as if asking me if I was alright. I sent her a wink and a thumbs up, to which she replied with a small smile. My gaze stayed fixed on the back of her head when she faced the front again, completely forgetting that I was in the middle of an interrogation. 

 

 

A light cough alerted me to a pair of watchful eyes and I tried my hardest to wipe the dopey look off of my face. I busied myself with taking notes and ignored the woman.

 

 

"Something's up with you and if I wasn't so preoccupied with my wedding plans I'd be down your throat right now fishing for dirt." She said, eyes still narrowed in my direction.

 

 

"You're seeing things woman, I'm perfectly perfect. Never been more normal in my life." I mumbled, my eyes widening imperceptibly at realizing that I had doodled a heart shape in my notebook. I immediately tore the paper and scrunched it up, shoving it in my pocket like I was hiding a bag of weed. 

 

 

Sulli looked at me weirdly again but before she could say anything I heard my name being called.

 

 

"Suzy and Amber..... Minho and Kai...... Choa and Jimin......."

 

 

"Wait, what?" I asked out loud.

 

 

The taller girl rolled her eyes, "Perfectly perfect my . We have a new assignment, Kang is partnering us up. Do you even know what class we're in?"

 

 

"Ha.Ha. Very funny." I waved her off, but just to be safe I checked the cover of my text book.

 

 

"Remember, this is five percent of your grade so don't take it lightly. You may use the remainder of class to discuss with your project-mate." After that was said, the class erupted into a bustling fish market as everyone shuffled about the class. Some didn't even bother to pretend that they were doing work and started talking to friends instead of their designated partners. 

 

 

As it was, my partner appeared before my desk as I was talking to one of my teammates and I looked up slightly surprised. 

 

 

Suzy was by no means an introverted person. In fact, she was the captain of both the cheer squad and tennis team in addition to being active in other school committees that I couldn't pick out at the top of my head. She didn't look like she had any issues as far as social skills was concerned, which is why I find it perplexing that no matter how friendly I try being to her, the girl would not say more than two sentences to me or even look me in the eye when doing so.

 

 

If Yuri was right about her crushing on me, which I highly doubt, she had a weird way of showing it.

 

 

"Hi.... Amber." She said quietly, eyes fixed on a random spot on my table.

 

 

"Hey partner." I smiled and fortunately, she cracked a small smile of her own at that.

 

 

"So I thought I'd just come over to ask if we could exchange numbers. You know, for the project." She rushed out the last part, awkwardly fiddling with her fingers. 

 

 

"Of course," I said and took out my phone for her. She handed hers to me and I accidentally went to her home screen after I finished keying in my digits. I recognized instantly the picture that she had saved as last year's yearbook photo of the football team. 

 

 

It didn't register with me at the moment that half of the picture was cropped and it happened to be the half that I was in, kneeling in the front row with five others in the frame. 

 

 

"Hey, neat. You a football fan?" I asked conversationally, thinking it was pretty cool that she supports the school team.

 

 

Her cheeks took on a deep shade of red and she hurriedly took her phone from my grasp, "I, uhm, no. Yes. I watch your games sometimes. Not your games specifically, I mean..... I watch them as a whole." She rambled on as her face continued to grow redder, but I was more glad that she didn't seem so abhorrent of me anymore to think suspiciously of her word vomit.

 

 

"Well, you do have our team's photo as your wallpaper. So either you're a fan or..... a boyfriend on the team perhaps?" I grinned teasingly, earning a shy glance to her feet.

 

 

"No, nothing like that. Unfortunately." She didn't mean to say the last part out I'm guessing, because her eyes widened in embarrassment.

 

 

The lunch bell rang and I hurried to reassure her, not wanting us to part with her feeling uncomfortable around me again.

 

 

"I didn't hear anything. And if I did, I'm just gonna say that whoever it is will notice a girl like you eventually." I sent her a wink and she smiled, her eyes finally shifting upwards to meet mine.

 

 

"I'll text you, to schedule a meet." She said shyly.

 

 

"Sure, I look forward to it." I grinned as I was packing my things until I felt a pair of thin arms wrap itself around my middle. A waft of coconut-scented shampoo bombarded my senses and I tried to appear unaffected as I turned in the arms to face the owner. 

 

 

Krystal was beaming up at me with adoring eyes and before I could process anything, she leaned up and pecked me on the cheek. It didn't linger, just a light graze, but it was enough to send my heart into overdrive. I was reminded about my epiphany this morning and I briefly wondered if she would still look at me like that if she knew about my newfound secret. 

 

 

My best friend, who kept her arms locked around me, turned to the rather uncomfortable-looking girl in front of us with a smile.

 

 

"Hey Suzy, this llama bothering you?" Krystal joked, to which Suzy responded with a shake of her head and an attempt at a smile.

 

 

"We were just discussing about the project. We're partners."

 

 

"I heard." It was meant to be casual, but at that instance the arms around me tightened in an almost possessive reflex. I would have read more into the gesture if only I didn't catch Kai staring at us as he was packing his things. At my gaze, he acknowledged me with a nod and looked away.

 

 

"Right. So I'll head for lunch now. Bye Krystal. Amber." She sparred me one last glance before hurrying out of the room.

 

 

"You didn't have to scare her off, princess. I was starting to make progress with that one." I said, taking the small pile of books and files she was holding.

 

 

She frowned, raising an eyebrow, "Progress how?"

 

 

I noticed her look and decided to , "I think she has a crush on me."

 

 

"You think? Everybody and their grandma knows that Bae Suzy has been crushing on you since freshman year." She snorted with a slight roll of her eyes. 

 

 

"Seriously? I've always had the impression that she didn't like me or something." I said, holding the doors to the cafeteria open for her.

 

 

"That's because you’re too dense and self-absorbed to notice things." She murmured, walking past me to sit at our table.

 

 

I looked at her funnily for a bit, wondering where the sudden attitude was coming from as she squeezed herself to sit in between Sulli and Jackson. Before I could give much thought to it, I was being dragged down by the sleeves of my shirt and I fell clumsily onto a seat.

 

 

“TELL ME YOU LIKE PUGS OR WE’RE NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE.” Luna yelled right into my ear and I almost dropped out of my seat at both the thunderous sound and the forceful grip on my shirt collar.

 

 

“YAH! Park Sunyoung! I’m not deaf you know.” I groaned, hopelessly trying to rub away the ringing in my ears.

 

 

“Not deaf, just blind.” Krystal quipped from across the table and I looked up to stare at her incredulously. She ignored my look and pulled out her lunch from her bag.

 

 

“Just say yes, Am. She’s on a rampage now after Jackson told her pugs were made on mars and has an old man’s for a face.” Minho whispered into the other side of my ear that did not have a murderous dragon breathing down on it.

 

 

I patted Luna’s head, “I’m more of a chihuahua fan myself but pugs are a close second.”

 

 

She looked somewhat appeased by that and went back to her seat. “Really? You don’t look like the chihuahua-owning type.”

 

 

“Yeah, Krystal and I always wanted one each. Preferably a boy and a girl.”

 

 

I only realized how odd that sounded when we received smirks all around the table. 

 

 

Jackson cooed, “Aww, you guys started planning your family. That’s so sweet my teeth is rotting. Don’t tell me you named them already too.”

 

 

I saw Krystal blush but she still refused to acknowledge me for some unfathomable reason.

 

 

“Yeah, she wanted to name the male. It was hard for us to agree on one but we eventually settled on JackJack.” I chuckled at the memory of the two of us, both roughly nine-years old, taking up the entirety of an evening in a playground discussing seriously about the names of our dogs that we already owned in our heads. We came home after our consensus, me with my pants full of sand because Krystal wasn’t the least bit amused when I offered to name one of them King Farts-a-lot, and spent the rest of the night trying to convince our parents that buying dogs for us would be the smartest decision they’ll ever make in their lives.

 

 

We’re now both in high school, still dog-less, but hopefully that will change sometime in the future.

 

 

“What did you name the girl?” Sulli asked. 

 

 

Krystal, who was idly picking at her salad, finally lifted her eyes to meet mine. 

 

 

A small smile grew on my face.

 

 

 

“Gongju.”

 

 

---

 

 

“You seem distracted.”

 

 

 

My body jerked a little at the sudden intrusion to my train of thoughts. Kai was looking at me with mild curiosity and I had to bite down a sarcastic response to that because yeah, who wouldn’t be ‘distracted’ if you found out all of a sudden you were in lov-

 

 

I sighed tiredly. 

 

 

‘Not going there. Not now.’

 

 

“I’m fine, just trivial teenager business. Sometimes I wish I could go back to a time when life was simple. When bothersome things like feelings and were…. irrelevant.” I said, mostly to myself, as I picked up my forgotten paintbrush and went back to my empty canvas.

 

 

“Trouble in paradise?” Kai asked kindly, no trace of hopefulness in his voice. 

 

 

In the last week or so, Krystal and I had grown considerably closer to him in different ways. It was hard for me to admit that I actually liked him (it was only recently that I confirmed why I found it so difficult to admit it) and no matter how little the dirt that I tried to dig out of him, there was hardly anything bad that I could say about the guy. 

 

 

He was virtually perfect for Krystal. 

 

 

So imagine the push and pull feeling that plagues me at wanting to give Kai a chance on one hand, and the other wanting to maybe….. give myself a chance.

 

 

There is absolutely nothing for me to go on that Krystal could be the least bit attracted to me (I mean she’s been crushing hard on the guy sitting next to me for quite awhile, you can’t just erase that with one conversation) but if there was one person in this world that could help me figure things out, it was my best friend. 

 

 

I thought about it and if I could talk to her about how I felt then…… maybe everything will just fall into place after that. It was wishful thinking but I didn’t want to regret not trying.

 

 

“Sorry if I was out of line. It’s none of my business anyway.” Kai said after a long while of silence on my part. If he only knew that I was just thinking about taking away his chance at dating the girl he was interested in.

 

 

“Nah, it’s cool. I just need to clear my head for a bit.” I gave him a reassuring pat on the shoulder and asked for permission to use the restroom. 

 

 

I was mostly in my head as I strolled through the hallways, when I heard familiar voices near the staircases. At realizing that they were no other than my two best friends who were likely having a free period, I decided to creep up on them and hopefully scare the living out of the two women.

 

 

That was, until I picked up on what they were talking about.

 

 

“I don’t think I can do this anymore. It’s getting tiring and the idiot is just too oblivious.” Krystal sighed and I heard a small bump on the wall, her head probably landing roughly on the solid structure.

 

 

“I’ve told you this many times and I’ll tell you again, I think it’s time you moved on.” Sulli was barely audible, seemingly cautious with her words. As if it was a fragile topic.

 

 

My heart thumped erratically in my chest. Could they be talking about Kai?

 

 

“Maybe it is. I don’t know Sulli… I’m in too deep already. But I don’t want to hurt anymore.”

 

 

“Then break off this silly arrangement you have with Amber and move on.”

 

 

Then I heard a light sniff, “I know that’s what I have to do….. but I just had to try…… I love h-” She didn’t complete her sentence as she fell into a resonating sob, a sound that struck a cord deep within my gut, twisting it, and leaving it to bleed through. 

 

 

If there was anything that I hated most in this world, hearing my princess hurting topped the list.

 

 

My feet moved at it’s own accord, and the next thing I know I was back at my seat, my gaze as blank as the canvas before me.

 

 

Was I so egotistical to think that I could win Krystal over and hope she’d eventually fall in love with me? It was Kai in the beginning and it is definitely Kai now who unknowingly has her in so deep to the point where he could make her sob like that.

 

 

It bothered me so much that he affected her so profoundly, that he had the power to hurt her like that. No, the thought didn’t sit well with me and so I decided right then that I would make this right. 

 

 

I never wanted to hear her cry like that again. 

 

 

Over a boy no less.

 

 

Kai furrowed his eyebrows at seeing the noticeably troubled expression on my face.

 

 

“You alright, dude?”

 

 

I blinked away the fleeting thought of the various ways I’d make him feel pain if he ever intentionally made her cry like that. 

 

 

“Yeah. Just something I need to do.”

 

 

“Sounds pretty important.” He asked, chuckling awkwardly at the solemn and pensive look I was giving him. 

 

 

‘Krystal is important. And if you ever think or treat her otherwise I will bend you over and make you see hell.”

 

 

“Look, there’s something you need to know but Krystal can’t know that you’re aware of this yet. You just have to listen to me and follow my lead. Got it?” I said, determination fueled by the sobs of my princess that still reverberated through my head.

 

 

“You’re kinda scaring me but sure, I’ll listen. What’s up?” He asked, eyes shifting nervously at my hard stare.

 

 

My throat was dry when the words left my mouth.

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Krystal likes you, and I know it’s mutual.”

 

---

 

 

A/N : This one’s for Sulli and Gongju. :( Both different kinds of tragedies.

 

Was this too melodramatic? I tend to go off into nonsense-land with angst. I love reading it and all but it’s probably not my forte when writing it. Oh well.

 

I apologize for the late update! Busy busy busy. Thanks for the feedback peeps, I read and appreciate every one of them. :)