CHAP 8: Time for change

“Good afternoon Mrs. Tuan.” - JinYoung said politely when he walked in to the Tuan’s house. On seeing him, Mark’s mom smiled brightly.

“Oh you came, JinYoung. I think Mark fell asleep already while waiting for you. Can you bring this up to him and wake him up for me? I made some soup for him to eat before he take the medicine.”

“Sure, Mrs. Tuan.” -he said and happily received the food tray from her, walking upstair to his friend’s room.

Mark was indeed still sleeping. The red hair curled himself on bed, shivering from his cold and JinYoung felt bad. He should have stayed with Mark rather than leave him like that. But it was good once in a while to give Mark his revenge. There was no way he accepted being the only one to feel the pain in their relationship.

Putting the food tray down on the table, JinYoung kneeled down next to Mark’s bed and stared at his love. Mark was so handsome, and the black hair had a to watch Mark sleep. In his sleep, he was peaceful, he was like a sleeping prince. JinYoung’s prince. The black hair giggled at his thought and continued staring, wondered what Mark would do to him when he woke up later.

*

Mark yawned and woke up around 30 minutes later. Just to find a sleeping boy on his floor. He startled at JinYoung’s presence but seconds later, he started to worried the black hair would get sick from the cold floor. He grabbed his blanket and wrapped around JinYoung’s body. The black hair shifted a little, but showed no sign of waking up.

Mark smiled to himself. He saw a tray of soup next to his bed, knowing that JinYoung had brought it up for him. He always felt good whenever the black hair cared for him like this. He never wanted that to change. No one could ever stand between him and JinYoung. So maybe there was not a name for their relationship, maybe Mark would still persist on dating girls and JinYoung dating Jackson, did it really matter for them to go public?

Mark enjoyed private moments like this with his JinYoung so much more. He felt cold again. But he was still too lazy to eat anything so he couldn’t take his medicine right now. Looking at the boy on the floor, the red hair didn’t dare to wake JinYoung up. But his sole blanket was down there…. He silently tiptoed down the bed, crawling next to the black hair and lay beside him. Mark slided his arm under JinYoung’s head and immediately, JinYoung turned sideway to snuggle his nose to Mark’s neck.

It tickles, of course. But the red hair felt warm. Not from the blanket which he now got back but from the constant breathing of the boy in his embrace. He could never denied that he loved this so much. He loved being with JinYoung so much. But why hadn’t he admit that he loves JinYoung? What was stopping him…. No matter what, he would do anything to protect the thing he had with the black hair. It was too precious, too treasurable to Mark.

He closed his eyes and drifted to sleep again, more quickly this time since he no longer worried that JinYoung in someone else’s embrace not his.

*

“Mark?” - the red hair heard a voice calling him. He lazily opened his eyes and saw JinYoung looking up to him with adorable eyes.

“Hmmm?” - he hummed with a low voice, still sleepy.

“Let me go. It’s getting hard to breathe.” - JinYoung chuckled. Mark was the best when he woke up. So cute yet so y with his messy hair. His arms were holding tightly on JinYoung’s waist, hugging the black hair so close to him that it was impossible to move.

“What if I want to suffocate you?” - Mark squealed the black hair even tighter, snuffing his nose in the soft hair.

A thought suddenly hit JinYoung as he rose up to kiss on Mark’s cheeks. Just a quick kiss, very quick, lasted less than seconds but still very surprising to the red hair. Mark let go and JinYoung escaped with a smile, watching his friend’s stunned face with pleasure.

“JinYoung….” - Mark shuttered, watching the black hair’s eyes wrinkled as he smiled brightly.

“What?” - JinYoung teased and stood up. - “Common, weirdo, finish your soup and take medicine. Not that I care for you but your mom asked me to.”

Mark pouted when he heard JinYoung said that he didn’t care, though he knew it was just a joke. He stood up as well and sat down on his bed.

“Feed me.” - the red hair said and pouted again. JinYoung knew he could never say no to that face. He smiled lovingly and fed Mark.

“You’re not a baby.”

“But I’m sick.”

“A sick grown-up can feed himself.” - the black hair said but his hands still stirring the soup and taking some spoon before putting in to Mark’s mouth.

“What are friends for..”-Mark protested.

“You didn’t see Jaebum or YoungJae , or any other boys asking me to feed them!”

“Well, it’s their lost.”

Then followed a stage of silence. Mark eyed the boy in front of him with as much love as he could and JinYoung could feel his ears burning hot. It was not like he had not heard Mark’s cheesy words before, but every time is like first time, especially when the red hair was never the one good with words.

“Sorry for leaving you earlier, I really had a date with Jackson.” - JinYoung had to bring up the topic. To be honest, he enjoyed the frown on Mark’s face, followed by a signature pout.

“Yeah. Whatever…” - Mark said before mumbled a little lower - “It’s not like I haven’t heard anything though…” - JinYoung still heard it. The black hair smirked a little inside, trying to keep his face cool. So Mark did know how to be jealous. So cute though.

“Do you want more?” - the black hair asked when Mark shook his head to the next spoon of soup. He suddenly lost his appetite. JinYoung took a glass of water and made Mark finished his medicine. It’s funny. Mark is his friend yet he felt like he was taking care of a baby.

“Do you and Jackson have dates often?” - Mark suddenly asked. JinYoung startled at the question, knowing too well what kind of “dates” the red hair was talking about.

“Why do you want to know?” - the black hair raised his eyebrows. Dating was something private of course. Mark sighed, he knew that. And yeah, why did he even want to know? It would only annoy him more and he didn’t even know why.

“Nevermind then.” -he said and snuggled down under the blanket again, letting the gentle hands of JinYoung his hair to sleep.

“JinYoung…” - he called and the other boy leaned down. Mark took his courage and pulled JinYoung’s neck down until their lips attached. He savoured the other’s lips, kissing fiercely, nibbling on the lower lip before shoving his tongue in.

“Hmmm…” -JinYoung was taken by surprise, a sweet surprise. Mark has never been this dominating. It somehow came off y. He eventually gave in to the heated kiss, let Mark pull his entire body lying on top of the red hair. There was hardly any space between them, their lips not once broke the contact as Mark took time to explore JinYoung’s cavern, making the other boy let out some involuntary moans. It was a win. Mark Tuan never loses to anybody, not to Jackson. If JinYoung could moan for the foreign guy, Mark could make him do that as well.

He trailed his fingers up and down the black hair’s torso, making JinYoung squirmed helplessly in his embrace. And the black hair started to protest. He started to have trouble breathing if Mark wouldn’t let go soon. He was sure his heart was going to explode from this overwhelming dominating red hair.

“Wow… Mark…”- the black hair still tried to catch his breath. Mark was as well, but his stare was still intense, his hands still lingered on JinYoung’s waist. - “Where was that come from?”

JinYoung got no answer. Mark kept staring, his hands moved up to cup the black hair’s face which was blushing hard. All those sudden affection pushed JinYoung to the edge. His confusion was taken to the unbearable point now.

After that fierce kiss, endless of kisses before of course, endless calls asking him to come over to snuggle, and with a slight hint of cheesiness, there was no damn way that Mark had no feelings for him. And no matter what it takes, he would make the red hair admit it. JinYoung was gonna give it a chance.

“Mark…” - he spoke when Mark’s finger tracing his lips, desired to pulled him down for another breathless kiss. - “Do you love me?”

The red hair startled. It came as such a shock that he sat up immediately, forgot that JinYoung was on top of him. He reached out his hands to catch the other boy just in time before he fell on the floor.

What? Why did he suddenly ask about this? Please JinYoung...I’m not ready. Please tell me that you’re not ready too… I’m not expecting this kind of talk right now…

Mark was panicking. And JinYoung could see it in the red hair’s eyes, the way his hands trembled. Was it that bad? Thinking about serious relationship with him made Mark like this?

“Why...why do you ask?” - that was the only few words Mark managed to spit out.

“Mark….” - JinYoung took the red hair’s hands and squeezed it slightly, somehow that comforted Mark. He stopped holding his breath. - “Is it really impossible for us to go out publicly? I’m so tired of just snuggling in your room like this…”

In the end, JinYoung felt coward. He could not gather the gut to require the answer from Mark when he was like this. In the end, he wouldn’t be finding out whether Mark loved him or not anytime soon. But at least, they could take step by step, starting with them going out on real dates, not like this.

Mark took a few minutes to think about JinYoung latest question. Yes, he was not ready to define his feelings for JinYoung. It was something so foreign to him. But yet the thought of going out, holding the black hair’s hands, hugging him or even kissing him in public stressed him out more. However, our red hair refused to admit that this was the reason of his complicated status with JinYoung.

So he would try. And if he passed, maybe it wasn’t disgust that stopped him from dating JinYoung, maybe they didn’t share any feelings at all. But if he didn’t, Mark might start to believe that he should overcome his denial stage and admitted that he fell for JinYoung.

Weird… how the red hair wanted himself to pass and not pass this hard test the same time… Either way, it was worth a try. He was curious, and it didn’t necessary to be now right? He needed time to be mentally prepare for this.

JinYoung patiently waited for Mark’s answer, which took too long and he started to give up. Just when he was about to step down from the bed, and maybe away from his one-sided love, Mark pulled him in and kissed him deeply again.

Weakly, JinYoung felt back to Mark’s embrace, let the red hair straddled his lips and maybe he would take that as a yes, as a promise that whatever they had right now would take another step forward.

In a good way, he hoped.

*

“Sorry, I’m late!” - YoungJae hurriedly parked his bicycle and rushed into Jaebum’s house, where there were already 3 other boys sitting there, looking at him with annoying faces.

“I’m not surprised.” - YuGyeom yawned, just arrived after his nap as well.

“I’m so gonna give you an alarm clock for your next year.” - BamBam poked his friend and laughed.

“I already did that last year ~ And maybe for this year too. Get in line BamBam!” - Jaebum laughed as they enjoyed teasing the small eyes boy.

“Hey! You guys called me over just to tease my sleeping habit?” - YoungJae grunted and sat down with the group.

“Uhm, what are we here for?” - YuGyeom cluelessly asked.

“You fools, for JinYoung and Mark of course.” - Jaebum repeatedly hit the big boy’s head.

“But I thought JinYoung said we should not interfere….” - BamBam was confused.

“And you are gonna believe him? Please, I know JinYoung. I rode home with him everyday, he definitely falls hard for Mark. That was not something he could forget and move on easily.” - YoungJae nodded, agreed with his classmate that they need to work this out.

“And yeah, am I the only one to notice that Mark’s stares for JinYoung was as lovingly, or even more, those he gave his girlfriend?” - JaeBum added.

They all agreed. The question was… “how”? How could they make Mark realize that he loved JinYoung too? And if he didn’t, they were gonna put a stop to this unhealthy relationship. The boys love JinYoung so much and they couldn’t stand seeing the black hair boy get hurt. Well, the better ending should be they date officially but if not, the other 3 boys needed to be prepare for the worst.

“So...what’s the plan?” - YuGyeom asked and they dug in, discussing their plan of getting their friends together.

*

“Hey, Mark! Over here!” - JinYoung waved at the red hair and Mark ran towards him.

“Hi, JinYoungie!” - Mark said a little bit playfully and ruffled JinYoung’s black hair. - “Where are the others?” - he asked before taking a glance at the other boy from top to toe. JinYoung was wearing a navy blue T-shirt with black jeans fitted his thigh a little too well. It was once in a times that Mark could see the black hair dressed up like this. And he mentally slapped himself for not realizing sooner that JinYoung was this damn handsome.

“Hey you weirdo, stop staring at me like that!” - JinYoung giggled and hit Mark’s arms slightly, secretly hoped that the red hair didn’t see his blushes. - “I have waited for half an hour now and no one shows up!” - he whined and Mark immediately felt guilty.

“Sorry, mom made me eat something and took another set of medicine before letting me go.” - Mark said and scooted closer to his friend as the crowd of people pass them, walking to the amusement park.

“Do you feel any better?” - JinYoung was worried again, placing his hands on Mark’s forehead to check his temperature. Jaebum gathered the group to go out today because it has been a long since they went to the amusement park. At first, he disapproved, claiming that Mark was still sick but the red hair said he wanted to go so he guessed it was okay.

Mark nodded, feeling already uncomfortable with the public skinship. He hoped not many people noticed them acting like this. He agreed to go this time, even though his sickness wasn’t entirely over. This might be one-of-a-kind chance for him to try …...dating (?) with JinYoung publicly.

They stood there waiting for another 15 minutes. Chitchatting for a while, JinYoung noticed how cute that he and Mark wore the same color of shirt today. Almost looked like a couple. Mark had a white loose tank inside with the navy blue shirt he wore outside. Blue jeans with a pair of Converse that he knew it was Mark’s favorite. As always, the red hair was outstanding handsome. He could already feel girls passing by, giggling not-so-much-quietly with Mark.

“Hey, where are you guys!?” - Mark almost shouted at the phone when Jaebum called.

“I couldn’t make it. Sorry guys! Mom needs extra help at her shop today. So urgent she won’t let me go!” - Jaebum’s voice sounded apologetic.

“Hello, YoungJae? You got sick?? But why so sudden?” - JinYoung rolled his eyes at the other boys’ called.

They hung up, looking awkwardly at each other. “YuGyeom texted me saying he just remembered he still had homework to finish.” - “Same with BamBam.”

“So, do you want to go home now? It’s only two of us left in the game.” - JinYoung laughed sadly. He knew Mark wouldn’t like the thought of two of them going out alone in public, let alone that it was the amusement park, with a lot of couple games.

“Why should we?” - Mark’s answered surprised JinYoung. He got even more shock when the red hair naturally took his hands and pulled him over the ticket room. “We’re already here. Let’s have a lot of fun so those idiots would regret that they abandoned us.”

Mark could see JinYoung almost glowed when he said that. His smile left wrinkles at the corner of his eyes and the other’s smile was so contagious that Mark couldn’t help smiling along. Yes, they were going to have fun. Maybe it was time for him to take a step forward, putting aside his usual shyness. If doing that could make JinYoung happy like this, Mark thought it was a good idea trying.

What was this feeling? I always want to make him happy. His smile was my strength. But was that strong enough to lead me over this denial stage….. Do I love JinYoung?

*

“Two tickets please.” - he could feel the clerk stare on their intertwining hands and JinYoung squeezed Mark’s hands tighter. It was a rare chance that Mark agreed to skinship public like this, there was no way JinYoung going to let that chance slip away easily.

Mark… I will make you realize you love me. I really hope you do love me…

The red hair breathed out, trying not to make a fuss over people’s stare at them. He could do this. He felt relieved when JinYoung distracted him from his messy thoughts by pulling him on a train which took them around the amusement park.

“Where do you want to go first?” -JinYoung asked, smiling brightly at the red hair and Mark felt his heart skipped a beat.

“Rollercoaster!” - he yelled excitedly.

“But...but…I’m afraid of height…”

“What? Really? You weirdo…” - Mark used his free hands to knocked lightly on JinYoung’s head. Right on that point, the train stopped abruptly, JinYoung felt forward and Mark caught him in his embrace. - “Hey, be careful, JinYoungie.” - the red hair nervously said when he felt the other boy too close to him, he could feel JinYoung’s breathe on his skin. It wasn’t like they had never been close like this, but it was the first time they were close when other people were around.

“Oh...sorry…” - JinYoung blushed and pulled away. Mark didn’t know why he had the urge to keep JinYoung closer to him again. In spite of the fact that there were people, he didn’t seem to care as much as he used to.

“Let’s go to the roller coaster, please!!!! It won’t be that scary.” -Mark whined and begged. “I’ll be there to protect you…” - he didn’t even know where was that come from. The words just spitted out from his mouth like that. But it would be a lie if he said he didn’t enjoy the cute shy face of JinYoung.

It turned out the roller coaster was not that scary. JinYoung just got a little dizzy when he got off but he smiled anyway when Mark slided their hands together. What was wrong with the red hair today really? It was like a total different person, not that JinYoung was complaining. However, he didn’t want to get his hopes up too high.

It turned out the one who needed to be protected was Mark. JinYoung couldn’t stop teasing the red hair when they got out of the ghost house. Mark was literally clung onto him the whole ride through the ghost house. And maybe JinYoung enjoyed a little much the way Mark hugged him around the waist, nudged his face into JinYoung’s neck when he was terrified. There were many people around them, they didn’t say anything. But there was still a worry inside JinYoung that the red hair would feel disgust and left him again.

At the end of the day, they sat down on a bench, watching over to the lake in the middle of the park.

“Hey,weirdo, what are you thinking?” - Mark pressed a cold coke to the side of JinYoung’s cheek and the later boy shivered.

“Hey~~” - he whined but smiled right after. Wrinkles at the corner of his eyes. The kind of smile he only showed when he was truly happy.

“Today was fun.” - JinYoung said and took an attempt to lean his head on the red hair’s shoulder. Mark didn’t push him away like other times.

“Uhm...it was…”

“See, I told you it would be better if we go out often rather than staying at your house day by day.” -JinYoung let out a carefree laughter.

Mark observed the way his friends beamed with happiness. It was true he had fun today too. He could say he slowly came over the shyness of public skinship now. But his feelings were the things he had not sorted out yet.

He was not gay. He could not love JinYoung. But why did he keep feeling like he did fall for the black hair….

Contrary to his thoughts, Mark leaned in and intended to place a kiss on JinYoung’s cheeks. But he didn’t expect the red hair to turn around and their lips landed together instead. A quick peck. Then they stayed silent, looking into each other’s eyes, as if they worried this moment would break if they said something.

Ring~~~

Mark’s phone vibrated. At a glance, he saw Yumi’s name. He looked up to JinYoung and saw disappointment in the black hair’s eyes. The phone kept ringing and he was torn between picking up or not.

“Pick up… Your girlfriend is waiting.” - JinYoung said and stood up to walk away. Before going too far to hear anything, here was what he heard.

“Hi, Yumi…. Yes… I’m hanging out with my friends...All 5 of them of course. We have fun.”

JinYoung tried to hold back his tears. He felt like a part of him had given up on loving Mark. He kept saying it was impossible between them. Maybe it was time he started to live true to his belief.

A/N: This is the longest chapter so far ^_^ hope you all like it ~ It's been a little busy for me to update during this month so please be patient and wait for me, I will make your wait worth it! Thank you for all the comments and subscribes~