Chap 5: True story

"What do you mean by that?"

"We are wrong....how...?"

JinYoung was surrounded with question that he didn't even know where to start first. He sighed. This was exactly why he hid it from them in the first place. He didn't want to make a big deal out of everything. Not like his story wasn't a big deal yet.

“Calm down guys. You’re giving me a headache.” - he held his head between both hands signing that they needed to stop.

“Okay. So tell us, the true story. I can’t believe we are best friends for years yet you are still hiding this from us. Don’t you trust us JinYoung?” - Jaebum said a little hurt.

“It’s not like that.” - JinYoung protested. - “It’s not simple as you think it is. Mark and I … we….are in a very complicated relationship.”

“How complicated?” - YoungJae asked and sat down as well. All of eyes stared at JinYoung’s, waiting for him to answer.

The black hair sighed one last time and told his friends…. The true story. Very inexplicable.

*

They were all friends back then. Like normal friends. In a group, you could say that Mark and JinYoung were the closest. And back then, the red hair had no trouble skin-shipping with his friend.

JinYoung truly missed that time. When Mark waited for him every time the school bell rang no matter how slow he might take to backpack all his stuff. They would go side by side with Mark’s arms flung around his shoulder, Mark’s lips would curve in a beautiful smile at his joke. They would take their bike and hang around the town, enjoying the breeze when cold came and sat down to drink some hot coffee while chatting about a lot of thing.

Back then, JinYoung didn’t know he was homoual yet. So did his friends. He was more biual. The black hair was having a hard time himself , being confused about his . But he knew one thing for sure. He had started to fallen for his best friend. And that was no other than Mark.

Then he became terrified. He didn’t know what it was like to tell his friends this. Would they support him? Or would they disgust him? Most importantly, how would their group turn out if they knew he loved Mark.

JinYoung admitted that the real reason behind his hiding, was that he had been scared. He was scared to know the answer. The reply Mark would be giving him if he confessed. The red hair sent him mis-signal every single time. From the day they met till now.

Mark was clingy, but only to JinYoung. Mark was the quiet type but only JinYoung could make him speak and laugh. Mark showed obvious favor to JinYoung out of their group of friends. Mark hugged JinYoung, sometimes sniffed on his head. Mark was being caring at the same time bullied JinYoung.

And JinYoung found some confident, thinking that Mark would at least have some feelings for him that was more than a friend. But then things happened. And that was when Mark got himself a girlfriend. And he had to tell JinYoung first about her.

“JinYoung!!” - the hoarse voice was unmistakable. The black hair boy happily ran towards his secret crush, trying not to show his excitement.

“Hello Mark.” - he said, blushed a little when the red hair smiled at him.

“I got something to tell you. Only you JinYoungie!” - Mark put a finger on his own lips, indicating the secret he was about to spill.

JinYoung heard his heart beat fast and hard in his chest. Was this what he had been waiting for? Would Mark really confess to him? He bit his lips, expecting a lot. Maybe too much….

“I had a girlfriend, JinYoungie. Her name was JiYeon. She was in the cheerleader team and I got my eyes on her for few months already. Finally I asked her out yesterday. And she said yes!!” - the red hair said, still smiling happily without knowing that inside, JinYoung broke a little.

*

“So you like Mark from first place, right? But JiYeon, I remember that girl. She and Mark dated for a while. That time we all find ourselves some lovers. And you met….” - YuGyeom paused. The truth suddenly hit him. As well as all other boys.

“That’s when you started dating Jackson.” - BamBam completed his friend’s sentence.

JinYoung quietly nodded. He didn’t want to show his friends his emotional side. He was the soul of the group. The one to make jokes and pranks. The one to lift up the mood. And he was always there to cheer up his friends. Not the other way round like this. So he smiled, though everybody know how fake it was.

“So you didn’t love Jackson? At all? But you still date him till this days, even if he went abroad. I was always admiring your love story.” - YuGyeom pouted but JinYoung couldn’t do anything but patted the big boy’s head.

“It’s not like I didn’t try….”

*

In his utmost agony, JinYoung was glad Jackson made a move on him. When he had to fake his smile every time Mark told him how fun his dates were, the black hair finally felt some love when Jackson confess to him.

At first, JinYoung was shock. He had been failing to find any girl to date since Mark’s incident. So he was quite sure he was homoual. But then when JinYoung heard Jackson said that he loved him, he wasn’t ready. He wasn’t sure if he fell for Jackson like he did with Mark. Or better said, would he be able to get over Mark?

The answer was the he should. And so he took the chance. Jackson didn’t know a thing about JinYoung’s feeling with Mark. So of course the other boy was beyond happy to have JinYoung’s acceptance.

They dated. Publicly. Surprisingly, with all the support of their friends. Maybe except one, Mark Tuan. The others might not notice the sudden change in their friendship but JinYoung knew Mark had been avoiding him since he came out. The red hair avoided every body contact with JinYoung, as if he thought homoual was a contagious disease. JinYoung should have known that his best friend is homophobic. He guessed that it was lucky he didn’t tell Mark his true feelings before. At least now they were still friends, though the black hair would prefer their bonding before more. However, JinYoung thought this may be good. Maybe Mark should avoid him, so that his heart would know how to move on.

So what… He dated Jackson. Jackson was sweet, caring, special in his own way. But Jackson was not Mark. JinYoung felt secured whenever he was with Jackson cause the boy was never afraid to show his love in public. Jackson made him realize that being homoual is not a thing to be ashame of. And with Jackson next to him, JinYoung knew how fun life could be when you live your true self.

*

“Jackson was so kind to you. He was so in love with you.” - YoungJae pointed out and shook his head. “Even when he was abroad, he didn’t forget about you, not even once. And you still love Mark all these time?”

“I don’t get it JinYoung. You said Jackson was kind to you. Why didn’t you move on? It’s not that hard to return the feelings of someone who loves you that much.”- JaeBum continued.

“And Mark and you went back to normal right? A little bit before he broke up with JiYeon. And now date Yumi. Why do you love him if he gives you this much heartbreak?” - BamBam leaned his head on JinYoung’s shoulder, sympathetically.

“Because Mark decided to be an .” - JinYoung gulped and swore. He held back a sob inside. Images flashed his mind. Then a smile reappeared. The one which caused wrinkles at the corner of his eyes. The true one.

*

JinYoung thought time would heal them all. It has been two months since he started dating Jackson and Mark was finally coming over his disgust. To JinYoung only, as the red hair said. Because JinYoung was his best friend. But he never showed his clingy side ever again. Not when the rest of the group was around.

“JinYoung, how to solve this? I totally forgot the equation.” - Mark pouted and scratched his head. It was a normal day when class had ended and both of them stayed to finished their homework.

“Let me see.” - JinYoung said and reached his hands to pull Mark’s notebook closer. But surprisingly, the red hair moved closer to him as well. They have never been this close since he dated Jackson.

“Uhm hmm?” - Mark hummed and nodded eagerly when JinYoung wrote down what the red hair was missing in class. Maybe he was asleep again that time.

Mark was too close. JinYoung shivered under the red hair’s breath on his ear. Mark pressed their cheeks together, his arm flung around the black hair’s shoulder. JinYoung turned his head aside and staring at his best friend. Mark was always handsome when he focused in something. Oh who was he kidding? JinYoung found Mark handsome in every way.

He kept staring and didn’t notice that Mark had been looking at him as well. All out of sudden, he planted a kiss on JinYoung’s cheek.

*

“WHAT?” - four other boys all screamed and JinYoung had to shut them down.

“It… was just a coincidence right?” - Jaebum confirmed.

*

It was not.

“Mark….” - JinYoung flustered and blushed madly. Why was Mark doing this? Before he could blurt out the question, he received another kiss on his forehead.

“Mark…” - the black hair barely breathed. What were they doing? Mark had a girlfriend. JinYoung had Jackson. But why did he enjoy this so much? His heart beated out of pace, his eyes stared wide open.

Mark’s eyes looked at him intensely, straight into his eyes. JinYoung could feel a pair of hands gripped on his shoulder as the other boy inhaled sharply.

Then he kissed JinYoung’s cheeks again. The soft lips moved up to his nose.

Finally,

Eventually,

On the lips.

JinYoung was beyond shock. He could swear his heart was dead by then. He could feel millions voltage was running through his body by then.

Mark’s lips moved slowly against his. The kiss was uncertain. Like the red hair was torn between letting go and going deeper. He closed his eyes as well and pulled JinYoung even closer till their body was pressed together.

The kiss went slow but steady. JinYoung didn’t dare to breathe as if he did this moment would break and he would wake up from this heavenly dream.

At the end, Mark pulled out and looked at JinYoung again. Gosh, JinYoung felt like he wanted the red hair to talk and not to talk at the same time. He just wished that the words coming out was what he expected.

But the reality was close to that….

*

“So Mark likes you as well?” - YuGyeom popped his eyes open.

JinYoung shook his head.

“But he kisses you. A lot of time.” - YoungJae raged. - “How does that not mean he likes you?”

JinYoung let out a small sigh. “The thing is… I don’t even know what his feelings was…”

“So it was just that….” - Jaebum finally realized.

“It was just that….” - JinYoung confirmed.

*

They stayed silent for all the rest of the time, still sitting close with JinYoung between Mark’s leg. With Mark’s hands the soft black hair of JinYoung. With slight kisses somewhere between. But no words were spoken.

And not that shocking, the next day, in front of their friends, they still acted like nothing had happened. But JinYoung asked nothing. Mark still explained nothing about what he had done. It became a secret rule between them. Things better done than said.

In front of everyone, Mark was still playing with JinYoung, hugging and teasing his ‘best friend’. But whenever JinYoung touched him back, he would avoid. His disgust was still there.

And so did his confusing action. Everytime they were alone, they redid that scene over and over again. Mark was back to the sweet, gentle one that JinYoung loves. He would acting childishly and asked JinYoung to spend time with him. On secret dates. In each other houses.

The snuggling, kissing, hugging. Mark and JinYoung. All in secret.

*

“Please, don’t tell Mark I told you guys about this. Please, I beg you. I don’t want to lose what we have.” - JinYoung held his friends’ hands.

They froze and stared at him. What Mark and JinYoung have? What was that? Did it even exist?

A/N: Sorry for the late update!! I got busy with Lunar New Year celebration. So here's a new chap with lots of revealation. I don't know if anyone caught my hints abt this on the few last chapters. Anyway, enjoy! Ur comments and subscribe is my strength. And thank u to those who upvoted this story! *give candies*