“Luhan.” Luhan and Krystal snapped their heads towards the source of the sudden chirpy outburst. Luhan’s face lit upon seeing the tall latter that was striding towards them.

His messy jet black hair was covered by a red cap, and he wore glasses that practically covered half of his face. He didn’t look nerdy though; Krystal noted. True, slightly goofy with his pearly white grin but adorable anyways.

“Chanyeol!” Luhan jumped from his seat and shouted in enthusiasm.

It’s been quite a while since the two have met, and the last visit wasn’t a friendly one either. It was a couple of months after the accident, and Luhan had visited him to inform him about everything that had happened. Since then, Luhan couldn’t bring himself to come here; not alone. He’d formerly wanted to bring the boys with him here, but after a lot of begging that was futile, and with everything that’s been happening lately, he kept postponing it. Frankly, if it weren’t for Krystal, he probably wouldn’t have come.

Chanyeol’s eyes flickered towards Krystal. His smile momentarily fell, but his lips curved up so quickly that it made her doubtful of the change of the mood.

Chanyeol instantly recognized her. Recalling the last time he’d talked with Luhan though, he wasn't supposed to act like he did. But seeing how tensed Luhan suddenly become, a thought suddenly popped in his mind.

Offering his all too famous widened grin, Chanyeol extended his arm to Krystal in which she willingly shook.

“And you are?” Luhan let out the breath he didn’t know was holding. He mentally screamed Hallelujah inside his mind as a dorky smile appeared on his face. He was momentarily afraid that Chanyeol would’ve forgotten about what he’d been told; it would’ve definitely rose questions he was not ready to answer.

“Krystal.” She couldn’t help but mirror his smile.

He glanced at Luhan while asking. “Girlfriend?”  

Luhan clenched his jaw when he noticed mischief in Chanyeol’s eyes. The jerk was toying him. “No.” He tried to sound as calm as possible. In all honesty, he was trying really hard to refrain himself right now from wiping the teasing smirk off Chanyeol’s face.

“Oh… well then…” he mumbled inaudibly to himself before his smirk stretched. He threw one last glance at Luhan before turning to Krystal, who was watching him in confusion, with an innocent smile drawn on his face. “What would it take to buy a pretty lady like you a drink?”

Krystal’s reaction surprised them both. Luhan snapped his head towards her when she burst out laughing. Chanyeol stared at her like a lost puppy; not really knowing why she was laughing. Luhan, on the other hand, looked like he was on cloud nine right now with the smug grin that was drawn on his face.

“God, I didn’t know that people still used those cheesy pickup lines.” She commented when her laughter finally died down. Offended, Chanyeol pouted. “But I thought girls liked cheesy.”

“Excuse him; apparently, he’s been living under a rock for so long.” It was now Luhan’s turn to smirk teasingly; he turned to Chanyeol and mouthed. “Karma’s a .”

“HEY” His face turned a slight shade of pink which of course didn’t go unnoticed by Luhan.

“You’re blushing.” He taunted.

“From anger.”

Luhan frowned at him before turning to Krystal. “The outcome of living under a rock; obviously.” He shook his head and feigned disappointment.

Before he could retort back though, Luhan spoke again. “Besides, she’s off limits.”

“And why is that?” It was Krsytal’s turn to become confused.

“You’re Chen’s.” He simply pointed.

“I am not.”

“Yet.”

“Speaking of Chen, how’s he?” Chanyeol suddenly spoke interrupting their little argument.

“He’s hanging in there… I guess.” He replied truthfully. He knew that Chen was still hurting… a lot, but he hoped that Krystal’s presence would make it slightly easier.

“He came by last night, but he didn’t look too well.” He spoke recalling last night when he’s seen him standing there. Chanyeol had gone back to retrieve his forgotten phone when he saw him. His face lit upon noticing Chen standing there, and he was about to approach but stopped upon seeing the look on his face. He didn’t look okay; far from being okay, and Chanyeol couldn’t just leave. He stood for a while and watched his friend from afar.

He deliberated approaching him again; maybe he’d be thrilled if he saw him, but also maybe it would bring back unneeded miserable memories for him. He watched him as few tears fell and as he mumbled few words. He couldn’t make any of them, and he itched to step a bit closer; to try and comfort him, but for some weird reason, he couldn’t. Maybe he needed to be alone; to vent alone; he thought.

He didn’t take his eyes off of him until he started walking away and eventually disappeared from his sight. Chanyeol had lied awake all night, he couldn’t sleep with all the thoughts that roamed through his mind. Chen had always been known for his chirpiness and gleefulness even during the toughest times. It was weird seeing the one who always drew smiles crumbling down like that. It was absurd. It felt like the nature’s been flawed.

“When exactly? And did he come in?” Luhan inquired almost instantly in surprise. Never would he have thought that Chen would come to this place. It would break him; that much he knew.

“After the place’s closed up. He didn’t get in; he just stood there for a while staring at it.”

“How did he look?” Krystal asked with worry laced with her voice.

“Broken.”

“Broken.” The word itched in her mind as she absentmindedly stared at the road ahead. Luhan was driving; taking her to God knew where. “We’re going to meet the boys.” Was all he said before they got inside the car and he drove off. Nothing’s been said after that; maybe because they were too frustrated by Chanyeol’s words earlier.

Chen wasn’t okay, and Luhan realized it now. How foolish of him; to actually think that Krystal could ease his pain a bit. This wasn’t a fairytale where love could replace the misery; that much he was aware of now.

He glanced at her from the corner of his eyes. Her worried and troubled expression didn’t disappear from her face since she’d heard Chanyeol, but at least it showed that she cared; maybe more than she was already aware of. With misery, happiness could tag along, couldn’t it? He silently hoped.

“Why aren’t you guys friends with Chen anymore?” Krystal suddenly spoke, interrupting the silence for the first time since they got inside. “He needs you, apparently.” She added; voicing her thoughts.

“He needs no one but his hyung.” the words rolled off of his tongue unconsciously, but hearing it aloud made him realize its accuracy.

“But you shouldn’t have given up on him.” she protested.

“We didn’t….”

“You’re all together, and he’s all alone… it doesn’t take a genius to know that you’ve given up on him.”

“He walked away.” He whispered sadly.

“And you shouldn’t have let him.”

“ Krystal, we didn’t.” He hit the steering wheel in annoyance. “We didn’t… we were all grieving, but apparently us being together was paining him more. 'It isn’t fair.' he always mumbled whenever we sat in the same room. So no, we didn’t give up on him. We actually tried quite hard. We lost two instead of one. And both of them… were stolen away, we didn’t choose for it to be like this.” His voice kept lowering with every word that came out until it eventually cracked.

“Why?”

“Why what exactly?” he sighed in exasperation.

“Why does he have to be alone? Why can’t he be with you guys? And Why...Why does he spend most of his time on guilt?” She asked with voice laced with frustration and pity.

“He’s not alone, he’s got you Krystal.”

“Me? I’m not enough.” She scoffed.

“Apparently, you are. Or else, he wouldn’t have walked away from us to have you.” 

“What do you mean? It’s my fault?”

“Forget it.”

“Luhan.” She pressed.

“Just forget it, okay? It’s no one’s fault, really. Now can we please change this subject?” The desperation in his voice shut her up. Reluctantly, she stayed silent but not before mumbling. “Why can’t everyone stop talking so vaguely?”

Luhan heard her question; loud and clear, but he didn’t acknowledge. If it were for him, he would’ve blurted everything out. He wanted to do so badly; she’s been once his confidante after all, so it was a little unfair to leave her clueless like this. Nevertheless, hell would surely break loose if he blurted anything out.

Therefore, silence fell between them throughout the rest of the drive.

Kicking the car door open, Krystal stood for few moments inspecting the place where Luhan had taken her. Other than the building that was facing them, and the couple of cars that were parked beside them, the area was deserted.

She then fixed her eyes on the shabby looking building. It looked old; uncared for and abandoned. Half of its windows were broken while the rest greyed by the dirt. The paint was crippled at parts showing the grey bricks underneath, and its door looked like it was barely holding itself together from collapsing into pieces. The building was once surrounded with plants; Krystal noted. With the thirst, they’ve eventually flattened into the ground leaving yellowish remains that made a crunching sound when their feet made contact with them.

Luhan’s noticed hesitation written all over her face as she walked. It was justifiable; the place wasn’t so encouraging. But it was all they could find; the only place where they could practice without anyone’s protests. Besides, it was spacious too. And between the numerous night practices, the endless confessions that its walls have heard; between the promises, the breakdowns, and the supporting words; the blossoming brotherhood that this place’s witnessed, it’d grown to be Luhan’s favorite.

“This had been once a warehouse.” Krystal turned towards him when he started explaining. “However it was abandoned when we were searching for a place to practice. We asked around, but it seemed that it wasn’t anyone’s property anymore. So we kind of invaded it.” He finished it off with a sheepish grin and she nodded before they began walking towards its entrance.  

The door squeaked when Luhan softly pushed it open and walked inside. Expectantly, the interior was as shabby looking as the exterior and also as void. Besides few instruments and two couches, there wasn’t anything else inside.

Her eyes instinctively landed on the three boys who jumped off their seats upon noticing their arrival.

“Finally.” One of them breathed in exasperation. “You know how long have we been waiting for you to get your over here? And what’s with the urgent….” He abruptly stopped complaining upon meeting Krystal’s gaze. She offered him an awkward smile, but it soon fell when she noticed how his expression changed into a furious one. “What the hell is she doing here?” She was taken aback when he suddenly barked.

“Baekhyun.” Luhan warned in a calm tone. He needed to stay calm or things would get worse. He already knew that they wouldn’t be so happy to have her here, but he didn’t expect for Baekhyun to act this way. Even with the people he didn’t like, he always faked it so he wouldn’t come off as rude. It seemed though that his hatred for her was far beyond what Luhan’d thought.

“What is she doing here?” He urged in a much higher tone without tearing his eyes off her.

The other two glanced at each other seemingly desperate to find a way to calm their friend down. Surely, they were as angry with Luhan as he was. After all, he didn’t tell them that he’d bring her when he already knew that they’d grown to hate her. She wasn’t welcome here. Nevertheless, they didn’t want Baekhyun to act like this.

“Baek…” One of them softly spoke. He tried to approach the said latter in order to calm him down a bit, but he was instinctively shoved by him.

“Don’t.” He sent him a murderous glare before shifting his eyes back to Krystal. The venom in his eyes sent shivers to her spine, and she wanted nothing more than to cower away.

“Krystal.” Luhan suddenly turned to her and smile while pointing at the two latters before introducing them. “This one’s Kyungsoo, and the other is Xuimin.” They tried to force smiles on their faces, but they looked too fake for her own liking.

The atmosphere was one of hostility, and Krystal couldn’t grasp why she was treated this badly. She wanted to yell at that Baekhyun guy; to ask what his problem was, but she decided against it for it would probably make things worse.

“And this… is Baekhyun. Don’t mind him; he’ll come around.” Luhan finally added. He sounded so casual and even sent her a sheepish grin as if Baekhyun wasn’t mentally killing him.

“If you’re done with this; get out and take her with you.” He spat.

Luhan turned a deaf ear. He didn’t acknowledge his rude words instead he continued speaking with Krystal who was looking at him in uneasiness. “So… This’s where our band practiced before. Chen was the lead vocalist; as you might’ve already guessed, and Baekhyun was…”

“GET OUT.” Baekhyun interrupted with a loud roar, and everyone, besides Luhan, gasped. He seemed the least bit phased, but he knew that his calm façade of his was about to crack.

“Baekhyun.” Luhan warned softly again. “You shouldn’t act like this around guests.”

That was it. Baekhyun was hardly refraining himself from beating the crap out of him until he realized how wrong it was for her to be here.

But before he could say anything though, his eyes landed on the petit figure that was hesitantly walking in.

Her long brown hair, her chocolate brown eyes that now locked with his own ones, her tinted pink lips, and her flawless milky white skin. Everything about her was still the same, every detail that he’d come to love was still the same. The dullness in her eyes and her nervous fake smile were the only things strange to him. With widened eyes and mouth agape, he kept staring at her as she made her way towards them.

Noticing his shocked expression, everyone followed his gaze until they saw her.

“Taeyeon.” Baekhyun breathed in bewilerment.

Uncomfortable with how the way they were staring at her, she awkwardly waved. “Hi.”

Like a deer caught in headlights, they all froze and continued staring at her with widened eyes except for Krystal who was alternating her puzzled gazes between them all. Stunned to silence, no words were uttered as the minutes passed by. Taeyoen wasn’t comfortable with their immobility, yet she couldn’t bring herself to say anything. She waited and waited for any of them to snap out of their trances and say something to break this uncomfortable silence, but no one did. She furtively stole a glance of Baekhyun whose face only showed incredulity.

Krystal waited for them to introduce her, but it didn’t seem like it was going to happen any time soon for they were motionless, so she settled on taking the initiative herself hoping that they’ll eventually snap out upon hearing her voice.

“Hey! I’m Krystal.” She waved back while offering her a widened smile.

Taeyeon’s eyebrows rose in question. She was sure that Krsytal was only mocking her, but her smile looked so weirdly genuine, and she didn’t look mad; not at all. Either she’d become a pro with acting or something was completely wrong with her.

Taeyeon was expecting more yelling and less smiling, she’d even stayed up all night last night trying to organize the words she was going to say and the endless apologies. But this… she couldn’t deal with this abnormal reaction.

“I already know? Is this some kind of a joke?” Taeyeon asked in uncertainty. She waited again for her raise her voice at her, or to nod; to do anything other than staring at her like she was some kind of a complete stranger but all she received was a puzzled look from Krystal’s side.

Taeyeon’s question that was laced with an irritation managed to snap the boys out. Panicking, Luhan quickly changed the subject silently praying that he’ll manage to save the situation. “Taeyeon! Why didn’t you tell us that you were back?”

She glanced at Krystal unsurely one last time before turning to him. “I arrived last night.” Her eyes wandered around the place momentarily seemingly searching for something. “Why aren’t the two troublemakers here? Who’s the poor victim this time?” She smirked.

“Is she talking about Chen?” Krystal leaned towards Luhan’s ear and whispered, but somehow Taeyeon managed to pick on what she was saying.

“What’s wrong with you? Why the hell are you acting like this?” She yelled in frustration. Taken aback by her sudden outburst, Krystal wasn’t sure if the words were actually directed to her. She pointed at herself in utter confusion. “Me?”

“Stop this… stop act-”

Taeyeon was suddenly silenced by the pair of lips that crushed on hers. Every part in her body stopped functioning momentarily and her mind turned blank. She didn’t react to the kiss instantly making him quite frustrated. He continued kissing more forcefully hoping to bring her to kiss him back. They stayed like that with their lips sealed together without any movement except from his side.

It wasn’t until few moments later that she finally seemed to snap out. She pushed her mind’s disapproving screams aside, and for the first time since very long, she unleashed her desire and let it dominate her. She fisted his shirt; tightly clinging on him for dear life. She tried to bring him closer, but it was impossible for their bodies were already practically adhered together.

Those lips; how long had she been craving to taste them again? How long had she been trying to falsely convince herself that she’d gotten over this feeling?

Everything simply dissolved as he deepened the kiss. He hungrily kissed her; showing her his desperation. Frankly, he panicked the instant she started asking so many questions, and he couldn’t think of any other way to silence her except with this. But the moment his lips touched hers, he felt like he couldn't get enough of it; like she was supplementing him with the only thing that was keeping him alive.

It wasn’t until few moments later that Baekhyun suddenly chocked between their kisses. Breaking away from him, Taeyeon's eyes suddenly snapped open and noticed the salty liquid that was now staining his flushed face.

“Baekhyun.” She softly whispered, and his eyes welled up eyes opened to meet hers. Sorrow was evident in his eyes, and her eyebrows shot up upon seeing the intensity of it. Something was wrong with him; something was terribly wrong.

“Baekhyun.” She worriedly urged again, but he couldn’t bring himself to speak. Few more tears spilled as he let his head hang low in defeat.

“Everyone get out; let’s leave these two.” Luhan suddenly demanded without meeting anyone’s gaze. His eyes were fixed on Baekhyun in helplessness, and even though he didn’t want to leave him alone in this situation, he didn’t really have much of a choice. He wouldn’t be able to help his hyung with this even though he desperately wanted to.

No one protested or uttered any word, and Krystal was the first to walk out of the place with xiumin and kyungsoo trailing behind, but they both paused momentarily on the doorstep and turned around to glance at Baekhyun. Like Luhan, they wanted nothing more than to stay here. They knew that he needed them.

Noticing their hesitation, Luhan walked towards them and patted their backs softly as telling them that it was okay to leave. Rather reluctantly, they all walked out of the place but not before Luhan turned around to take one last glance at Baekhyun before leaving.

Not minding any of them, Taeyeon inquired worriedly again. “What’s wrong Baekhyun?” 

"Baek." She pressed with a softer tone this time when they all went out and raised his head in order to make him meet her gaze.

“Everything.”

“I’m glad she decided to come back.” Kyungsoo commented once they all stepped out.

“Do you think she’ll stay with him?” Xiumin voiced his inner fear. “I mean… she did leave for a reason.”

“She’ll realize that the little misunderstanding is now nothing compared to what they both have on their plates. They need each other.”

“Do you think she’ll stay out of pity and need only?” Luhan, who was been silent during the little conversation, now asked worriedly. He’d seen how Baekhyun was affected by her sudden departure, and how miserable he was when she was away. And the incident took place, and it was the time when the said latter locked himself up. They had to beg for an entire month for him to finally come out of his room. ‘It feels like Mother Nature’s having fun paining me.’ He’d once said when they were all sitting together. Luhan didn’t want his hyung to crumble again for this time he feared that no one would be able to pull him out of his sorrow.

“No.” Kyungsoo replied almost instantly in confidence.

“You’re saying it like you’re so sure.”

“I am.” Noticing the confusion written all over Luhan’s face, Kyungsoo continued. “Other than the fact that she was clinging on him so desperately when they were kissing, Taeyeon was extremely tensed when she walked inside and saw Baek… It means that she still didn’t get over him; he’s obviously still having an effect on her. You should worry if she didn’t look phased by him.”

Luhan’s lips curved up into a small smile. He surely hoped that what Kyungsoo said was real; it’d make things easier and whole lot better.

“Well, I’m taking Krystal home now. Need anything?” They both only shook their heads as a response. He patted their backs lightly before walking towards his car with Krystal trailing behind.

Luhan has been driving for the past ten minutes in complete silence. For some weird reason, Krystal hadn’t asked him any question since they got inside the car like he’d expected. He feared that she was creating her own assumptions and thinking too hard about it; especially after the way Taeyeon treated her earlier. When he felt like he couldn’t tolerate the silence any longer, he spoke. “Shoot.”

“Hmm?” Krystal mumbled absentmindedly before turning to him.

“I know you’ve a lot of questions, so shoot. I’ll answer them.”

“Ohh..” she trailed off and stayed silent for few more minutes.

“She’s Baek’s ex if you’re wondering.” He suddenly began feeling the need to explain. “She’d been out of the country for a while, and no one really knew where she’d travelled; not even Baekhyun. After some misunderstanding between the two, we woke up one morning to find a text from her saying that she’d left; without explanations and without giving us a way to reach her. It was before… you know… the incident…” He glanced at her from the corner of his eyes and saw her nodding before letting out a sigh and continuing.

“We couldn’t reach her; so of course, she wasn’t informed about his death. That’s why she’d asked earlier about the troublemakers.”

“She was talking about him and Chen, wasn’t she?”

Luhan nodded. “She has absolutely no clue that both of them aren’t around anymore.”

The sun’s long set, and the sky’s become a sea of black by the time Luhan’s car came to a halt. The drive back home has been long giving them enough time to talk. Luhan has shared few more stories about his hyung and told her about his friendship with Chen.

He kept talking about so many events; even sometimes reciting ones twice. He didn’t actually give her any space to ask any questions; not that she got any with the amount of information she was given. He’d been forced to stay silent for so long, and now that he’d been freed, he felt like he couldn’t shut up. Words kept coming out of his mouth like a flood that couldn’t be controlled, and in all honesty, Krystal didn’t mind it. His stories revealed a side of Chen’s character; one that wasn’t tainted with his bottled up sorrow, and she found appreciative.

Taking off the seat belt, Krystal’s hand stayed on the car’s door handle momentarily deliberating something inside her mind. She turned around to meet his gaze. “Why are you telling me all this?”

Luhan was slightly taken aback by her question…had he… had he revealed too much?

“I already told you that I like talking about him.” He replied calmly; in complete contrast to the turbulence inside his mind.

“No…I mean; you took me to meet your friends who didn’t appreciate my visit. They obviously didn’t want to see me, yet you took me there. You tell me about so much like we’re long lost best friends. I’m not complaining I swear… I just want to know…Why?”

Luhan paused momentarily thinking about an answer for her question. How was he supposed to explain it? How was he supposed to tell her that they’d once indeed been friends? Like really close?

He averted his eyes away from her questioning gaze before heaving a sigh in exasperation. “The boys don’t hate you. They just think that Chen isn’t with us anymore because of you. They think that you stole him away from them. They want to blame someone for all the things that got wrong and all this misery. They vent by pointing their accusing fingers and unleashing their anger on you.

And why am I doing this? I’m doing all this for Chen, but everyone’s unfortunately too blinded by their own emotions to realize it. Am I manipulating you? Yes. Will it become harder for you? Maybe. And do the boys hate me right now for what I’ve done? Of course. But honestly, I don’t care; I want my friend back. I think one was already too much to handle.”

Even though she was overwhelmed with his bluntness, she couldn’t help but ask this question. “Why me?”

“Because Chen’s left everything behind to have you. He feels like his friend’s death was unfair; that he being alive and continuing living is unfair. It’s not fair to have you; to have us; to have music…to have everything when his hyung had nothing. Therefore, he chose to leave everything behind. He thought that being so miserable would ease off his guilt a bit, but apparently, you’re the only thing that couldn’t get away from. I do believe that you have a huge effect on him, and that’s why I’m using you… Because you’re the only thing that could bring Chen back.

But if you want to leave… then just leave; leave now. Because the more you stay, the more dependent he’ll become on you. The more you stay, the more vulnerable he’ll be. And the more vulnerable he’ll be, the more pieces we’d have to adhere when he crumbles… and I doubt that there’ll be even a  possibility to bring him back again if you ever abandoned him.”  

Krystal laid on her bed thinking about the words Luhan had said earlier. So for some weird reason, Chen’s chosen to be with her. She now understood why his friends, especially Baekhyun, acted that why earlier. They had the right to; after all, Krystal was nothing compared to them. They’d been his friends, more like his brothers, for so long, and they shared infinite memories together that shouldn’t have been tossed away like this for Krystal who’s only known him for what? Few weeks? Of course, it wasn’t fair for them; even she admitted it.

Her fear was slightly pushing her to consider leaving; to drift apart from Chen until he gets that she didn’t want him any longer. It would be hell lot easier for her; and maybe it’ll even make Chen reconsider his choice…maybe he’ll realize how worthless she was.

But there was a small voice in the back of her head that begged her not to leave. What if her departure only made things worse? What if she was the last resort to bring him back? What if he chose to isolate himself more if she did leave? She didn’t want to up like that.

She didn’t know from where this small voice emerged; Was it pity or did she really care about him to an extent she wasn’t aware of? It didn’t matter the answer for it, but for some reason, it bugged her to know its answer.

Her phone suddenly vibrated on her night stand announcing that she’d received a text. Thankful to the interruption, Krsytal straightened her back on the headboard before reaching over her phone. Swiping to unlock, her eyebrows shot up when she read it.

From: Yi Fan

I’m coming home.

The doctor's coming back! 

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