Chapter 5

Saudade

The floor squeaked in displeasure when Krystal’s foot made contact with it, and she was instantly engulfed with the vintage aura that this place held. The sound of classical music could be heard from afar, and the scent of the old papers had filled the place. Krystal’s eyes fluttered close while she let herself enjoy being inside of this place that she’d come to love throughout the years.

Whenever she felt down, she’d come here and lose herself inside one of those books. They’d always managed to make her forget about her own dilemmas and instead she focused on the lives that they offered. She’d found herself quite few times getting attached to the characters, and she couldn’t deny how surreal it’d always felt.

To her, they weren’t imaginary; they were just unattainable. They couldn’t be seen, but they could be felt and most of the times they’d affected her deeply.

She’d been called a bookworm several times, a loner, a nerd for she always walked around with a book in her hand. But she’d never brought herself to reply and had always brushed those comments off because in all honesty, she’d pitied them. The roller coaster of emotions that one must ride while reading a book wasn’t perceivable for them; they couldn’t decipher how it was possible for inked words to stir such emotions inside, and because of that, she’d felt sorry for them since they’d only lived one life with a limited number of friends rather than a thou.

 

Krystal tiptoed and with great difficulty tried to reach the upper shelf. When she finally laid her hands on the book, she grabbed it and crouched down until she felt the cold floor underneath her. She let out a satisfactory sigh as she stared at the cover for few minutes. It’d been so long since she finally laid her hands on the book, and to say that she was ecstatic would be an understatement.

Her eyes twinkled in delight while she brushed off the layer of dust until it finally revealed the book’s title. No matter how many times she’d read this book her excitement never lessened, and right now was no exception.

She opened the book on the first chapter was ready to devour its words when a voice interrupted her.

“It's hard to come to terms with the fact that you aren't going to be loved the way you want to be loved.”

She raised her head slightly only to be met with a pair of dark brown eyes that was fixed on her. They belonged to the young man who towered over her with a warm smile on his face.

“It’s hard to come to terms with the fact that you aren’t going to be loved the way you want to be loved.” He repeated his earlier words again. “Making faces by Amy Harmon, I believe it’s the book that you’re reading?” He added when he noticed her confusion, he then took a quick glance at the book that she held to confirm his words.

She diverted her eyes towards the book before his words finally registered. She only nodded in response for she was too engrossed her own thoughts.

Those deep brown eyes; they were awfully familiar, but she couldn’t pin down where she’d seen them. Even though she tried to rack her brain, she failed to remember.

“It’s your favorite book, isn’t it?” His question has snapped her out of her thoughts and piqued her interest.

“How did you know?” She looked at him suspiciously while he crouched down beside her and replied nonchalantly. “Lucky guess.” She only nodded even though she wasn’t convinced with his reply.

“And the way you stared at it was unmistakable.” It was then that she raised her head suddenly and looked at him. “Wait, you were watching me?”

He chuckled when he detected accusation in her tone, and the sound didn’t ease Krystal’s jitteriness. “I might’ve been for the last few minutes?” His reply sounded more like a question while he grinned sheepishly at her.

The revelation only increased Krystal’s discomfort, and she stared at him with widened eyes.  “I’m not a creep I promise, I just happened to find you here when I entered.”  He spoke fast while he laughed. 

Krystal let her head hang low when she felt her deep frown threatening to be replaced with a smile that mirrored his. She couldn’t deny the fact that she’d found his smile contagious and the sight of it was refreshing.

The silence that had fallen between them was soon interrupted by Krystal’s voice. “Have we met before?” She finally asked the question that nagged her since his arrival.

“Do you remember seeing me before?” She shook her head slightly at his question.

“Then I guess not.” He whispered while he averted his stare towards the blank wall that faced them.

His vague answer confused her more, but her questions were soon abandoned as she stared at his profile. It wasn’t until now that she’d finally managed to take a proper look at him.

His brown hair was brushed into the side, and his jawline only managed to emphasize his beautiful features. He wore a white button down shirt with rolled up sleeves, blue jeans and white converse. He looked a year older if not her same age, and she couldn’t deny that he was indeed handsome.

“Do you come her often?” She inquired again after a while of complete silence.

He was quiet for few seconds until he finally looked at her while he spoke. “Someone practically dragged me here once, but I hadn’t entered this place since then.”

“Your girlfriend?” She face palmed herself as soon as the words were slipped from . It was the first thought that had crossed her mind, and she unconsciously spoke it out. She regretted her question because she didn’t want him to mistaken her for being nosy.

“You could say that… yeah… I guess.” He replied hesitantly as his lips quirked up into a pained smile. She didn’t have enough time to let his words sink in because he then spoke again.

“Making faces or the fault in our stars?” Krystal smiled when she realized that he was using the same tactic that the couple in her favorite book used, and she didn’t need to think twice before she answered. “Definitely making faces.”

“What?” he looked genuinely surprised by her answer. “Come on, I even prepared myself for your fangirl moment over Augustus.” Krystal found herself laughing at that.

“So you’ve obviously read both books? A book lover we have here?” She managed to stay when her laugh quietened down.

“No, no… I’m not. I was just forced to read them.”

“So what brings a not-book lover here?” Krystal inquired seriously.

“Do you find my presence so annoying?” He replied almost immediately. Krystal was slightly taken aback by her swift response nevertheless she managed to shake her head as a reply. Honestly, she had always loved to randomly meet new people, so his company was quite thrilling for her.

“Good.” He sighed satisfyingly.

“What’s your name?” She asked out of the blue.

“Chen, yours?”

“Krystal.”

 

They’d both agreed for a while more to read, but they eventually ditched the books since Chen had interrupted her every few seconds with different questions. Neither of them seemed aware of the clock that ticked by as they enjoyed each other’s company. People entered and left, and before they knew it, the “little while” turned into hours, yet they remained seated in their earlier spots.

“His death was inevitable; I mean it was pretty obvious from the beginning that he’d eventually die.” Their conversation was now averted towards a book which they’d both read.

“Of course I knew that he was dying, all I’m saying is; I just had higher expectations for the way she’d write it. I mean, his whole death part was crap. I wanted more; I needed more. He was a truly impeccable character that influenced me and he deserved a better ending.” Krystal let her head hang low as she finished her explanation with a sigh.

“Well, I wanted to show you something.” Chen abruptly stood up before he spoke and walked towards one of the shelves. His hands brushed few books before he finally settled on one. He showed it to Krystal and urged her to open it. Krystal’s interest piqued when she noticed that it was another version of Making Faces, and she felt herself getting excited as she wanted to know what was so special about this one.

She was greeted by someone’s messy handwriting the moment she turned the first page.

“Everybody is a main character to someone.” She recognized those words instantly since they were a quote from the book. She looked at Chen questioningly before she continued reading. “Always remember that you’ll forever be mine.” 

She was silent for few minutes as she stared at the words that were written. “I wonder who this girl is…” she let her words trail off as a thought suddenly crossed her mind.

“Did you write this?” She suddenly asked as she looked at him hopefully, but he only shook his head as a response.

“So, it’s not yours?” She replicated his earlier action when he asked as her disappointment mirrored his.

“Where… how did you find this?” She inquired again.

“I’d found it that time when I’d come here.” He paused for few seconds before he asked. “Are you completely sure that it’s not yours?” His emphasizing on the question and doubtful tone made her question herself, but she managed to push her hesitations aside and answered confidently. “I’m pretty sure, yeah… It’s not your girlfriend’s, right?”

He seemed disheartened by her words and without meeting her gaze he replied. “No, she assured me that it wasn’t hers.”

 

The matter was soon forgotten after her mother’s call. She’d nearly pleaded Krystal to return to the house, and with an exasperated sigh, she gave in. When she finally hanged up, she found Chen standing before her with his hands stretched towards her. She gladly took his hand as he helped her to stand up.

He didn’t need to beg for her to accept his offer to walk her home. She knew that walking home with a stranger in this late hour wasn’t a smart thing to do, yet she didn’t care because she wanted to be spontaneous for one day without feeling the need to think about all her actions beforehand.

 

The moon shone brightly illuminating the starless sky above their heads. They walked slowly through the vast streets with the sound of their hysterical laughs echoing loudly. They’d talked about the most random stuff, and Chen’s most embarrassing stories from his past had entertained her very.

Chen’s company was overwhelming thrilling because he never failed to crack her up. Throughout the whole walk, they both failed to muffle her laughs that disturbed the streets’ quietness. From afar, one would surely mistake them for two drunks as they walked without seemingly any care in the world. Their steps faltered quite few times while they walked as they tried to shush themselves. They’d both mirror each other’s actions by putting a finger on their mouth as they signaled with all seriousness to shut up, yet they’d eventually erupt with hysterical laughs again.

 

Krystal was too engrossed in the entire thing that she didn’t focus on where they were heading. So when they finally wiped their tear stricken faces as their laughs quietened down, she was surprised when she realized that she’d reached her house.

“Well, my house’s right there.” She pointed at the tall building to their right.

She rocked back and forth on her heels as she waited for him to say anything. She knew that she wasn’t supposed to have high hopes, but she couldn’t stop herself from silently wishing for him to ask for her number.

 “It was great meeting you today…” he paused for a minute before he asked with hopefulness. “Will  I ever see you again?” 

“I sure hope so.” She replied truthfully while her lips turned into a smile. She was hesitant for few seconds, but when she realized that he wasn’t going to say anything else, her smile fell the moment she turned around.

She glanced back at him one last time and found him watching her with a smile evident on his face. He raised his hands slightly as he waved at her. A ghost of a smile managed to appear on her face as she replicated his action.

Her earlier wish was crushed, and she walked home with slouched shoulders and a head hung low.

 


 

AN: 

Double update!! xx 

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Thankyouu <33

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Its_Ally
Finally updated! sorry for taking long xx

Comments

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harlibug #1
Very cute <3
weirdtou #2
Chapter 33: Thank you so much for updating, this story is really good..
So the secrets is begin to revealed? Wkwkw
Thank you for not abandoned this fic, and i know school come first, so good luck for ur senior year dear....
aee_eusebio
#3
Chapter 33: Three, you’ve seen pigs fly before. >> somehow, because we're still guessing how krys was back then, i believe she ever said that before haha XD
but but but but "Chen’s in love with you" ugh my chenstal feelssssssss T^T
bless you for not abandoning this fic *cries a river*

thank youuuu and good luck on your senior year, i know how it feels lol
softsology
#4
Chapter 33: AND THE SECRETS ARE BEING REVEALED OMO
AHHHHHH *is screaming out loud*
Hey it's okay~ School comes first cx
so GOOD LUCK!!! FIGHTING!!!
aee_eusebio
#5
Chapter 32: AAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHH I'M CRAVING FOR MOREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE


did you really discontinue this awesome piece?? T^T
aee_eusebio
#6
Chapter 22: Chen. For being the worst dancer alive. My favorite line. And he's also my favorite dork.
ughhh my chenstal feelsssss
weirdtou #7
Chapter 32: I ve never been this excited of a fanfic for such a long time, and I really hope they you will continue this story, this story is really great, I love how you potray their emotion
weirdtou #8
Wow, this fic is amazing, I can not believe that I just found it today
.
mountaine
#9
Chapter 31: This chapter was one crazy roller coaster ride!!! As crazy as how Chen rode it! Gooooosh, stop pushing each other away ;~;
GalaxyyExotic #10
Chapter 29: Honestly I'm really really confused right now. You write the best all the descriptive is a lot a lot better than other cliche stories that uses little vocab. Love u ♡