Double Trouble

Note: This chapter is raw.

Jessica yanked the girl’s down without hesitation with one hand while her other hand held the girl firmly by her waist. Looking deep into Taeyeon’s eyes, Jessica smirked. Without words, she s her hand up one of Taeyeon’s thighs before she gently cupped the girl’s heat, eliciting an immediate moan from her.

“You’re so beautiful. Do you know that?” Jessica whispered, and then she slowly let a finger enter Taeyeon.

Taeyeon threw her head back as fell open from the pleasure. “Kitte—”

“Jung Krystal!”

Both Jessica and Taeyeon froze immediately at the voice of someone they dreaded the most. Jessica’s eyes darted to Taeyeon’s equally fearful and widened eyes. That voice was near. Awfully near. Taeyeon was scared stiff, but what scared her more was the way the colours were drained out of Jessica’s face completely. And, Jessica was shaking.

Taeyeon kept her eyes fixed on Jessica, who retracted her finger and then slowly stood up. She followed suit as she tried her best to keep her calm while she tidied her clothes, standing behind the president.

“Jung Soojung!”

The voice sounded again and Taeyeon swore she saw Jessica flinching. She never knew Jessica was that scared of her mother. Protectively, Jessica reached backwards to grab Taeyeon’s hand. The slightly older girl squeezed a little tighter, hoping to provide Jessica with just a little more strength.

The footsteps drew closer and closer, and the heartbeats of both girls pounded faster and faster. It’s okay. I’m here. Hell I’m ing here so she won’t be able to do anything to Taeyeon, Jessica tried to convince herself.

The footsteps stopped.

Jessica bit hard on her teeth as she narrowed her eyes at the door. Click. She could hear the sound of her mother’s hand reaching the doorknob. She drew in a deep breath, ready to fight whatever would come her way. The doorknob moved and Jessica held onto Taeyeon’s hand tighter than before. I’m not afraid of her. I won’t be. I will fight for Taeyeon because—

“Mom!”

Jessica’s eyes widened at her sister’s voice outside the office. Shocked, she turned back to look at an equally shocked Taeyeon before she turned her head back.

“Krystal.”

Mrs Jung’s hand left the doorknob with a soft click and Jessica finally let out the breath that she didn’t even know she was holding. She was already on the verge of tears when Taeyeon rested her hand on her shoulder. When Taeyeon gently squeezed on the tensed up shoulder, Jessica found her tears falling silently. She was so afraid of losing Taeyeon. As if she could sense that, Taeyeon pulled her hand out of Jessica’s grip before she wrapped her arms around Jessica’s neck and rubbed her cheek with Jessica’s.

“You’re okay. Baby we’re okay,” Taeyeon comforted in a whisper.

***

After dealing with her mother, Krystal was back outside her office. Knocking at the door, she called out, “Jessi it’s me. Are you in there?”

“Yeah we are. Come on in,” came the reply.

Krystal opened the door and found Taeyeon sitting at her desk and her sister, on the couch. Raising her eyebrow, she closed the door behind her but she stood where she was.

“So why are you guys sitting so far apart? I was half expecting you guys to be all over each other,” Krystal teased as she laughed. However, when Taeyeon and Jessica both didn’t laugh, she frowned. “Were you guys actually…really doing something weird when mom came knocking…?” The younger Jung turned to stare at her sister who wouldn’t look back at her, and then at Taeyeon whose guilt was written all over her face. She pursed her lips and then she scratched her forehead mindlessly. “Seriously, you guys just decided to have se— I mean, do weird things in my office without even locking the door? What are you guys even—” The girl stopped abruptly when Taeyeon prompted her by shaking her head.

It was only then the younger girl noticed that her sister, who in her usual self would have long snapped at her, was awfully quiet. Sparing one more glance at Taeyeon, she bit her lower lip as she made her way towards Jessica. Choosing to squat down in front of Jessica instead of joining her at the couch, she looked up into her sister’s eyes.

“Jessi you okay?” she asked as she lightly placed her hand on Jessica’s thigh. Jessica nodded, even though her face indicated otherwise. Krystal then found herself standing up before she cupped Jessica’s cheeks. “Don’t worry sis. You know I always got your back.”

***

Taecyeon dragged his feet until he finally arrived home. He stopped for a brief moment when the extra pair of heels came into view. Oh right, Taeyeon. He let out breath to clear the sudden congestion in his chest, and then he reached out to key in his passcode.

When he noticed a figure after opening the door, he immediately greeted without hesitation. “Hi Jes—” He found himself staring awkwardly at Taeyeon who was initially studying the photo frames on the shelf before he quickly regained his composure. “Hi Taeyeon.”

“H-hey hello!” Taeyeon returned the greeting as awkwardly as it could be.

Taecyeon gave a small smile and then he closed the door behind him and kept his shoes neatly tucked away. Then, he turned back to face Taeyeon once more.

“So…where’s Jessica?”

“Oh she’s—”

“Here,” Jessica responded while she appeared out of a room with a smile.

A grin turned up on Taecyeon’s face almost instantly. He never could resist a smiling Jessica.

“Anyway,” Taecyeon said as he slightly lifted his arm that carried a paper bag. “Bought you girls some food just in case.”

“What did you buy?” Jessica asked, making her way towards the dining table just like the other two.

“Macarons? Green tea with red bean filling.”

Taeyeon’s eyes lit up at Taecyeon’s words. “What…?”

Jessica’s frantic eyes met Taecyeon’s before her cheeks flushed slightly. The man was unable to hold back a small laugh at the girl. Turning to Taeyeon, he said, “Yes, your favourite. Jessica mentions it a lot and since you are here, I thought I might as well.”

Surprised, Taeyeon turned to look at Jessica but the girl refused to have any eye contact with her and it only made her smile wider than ever.

“She talks a lot about you way more than you probably think she does, Taeyeon,” Taecyeon added, much to Jessica’s embarrassment.

“No I don’t,” she argued.

“Oh, so who’s the one who likes blue, shikhye, anything with red bean… Wait, what else… Ah, games.”

Taeyeon’s eyes widened as Jessica’s mouth fell open. When Taeyeon’s surprise subsided and she started laughing, Jessica could only heave a sigh. “Taec did you really, really, really have to tell that to her?”

Taecyeon shrugged with a grin before he put down the bag of macarons and reached out to gently push the two girls by the back of their necks to sit down at the dining table. “Let’s just eat.”

***

It was an hour later when the three were done with the macarons and a fair share of laughter as they talked about their individual experiences during the period when Jessica was overseas. However, the talk had to happen and Jessica decided that she shouldn’t drag it any longer. Turning to Taeyeon, she said, “I think I’m gonna have to talk to Taec for a bit. Do you want me to send you home first?”

“Ah it’s okay. I can just hail a cab,” Taeyeon declined.

“Look at the time, it’s already late. Why not just stay over? I’m sure Jess has some clothes you can wear or something,” Taecyeon suggested instead.

Jessica only looked at Taecyeon in slight confusion, but when the man gave a smile in return, she found herself just nodding instead.

“Isn’t it…inconvenient?” Taeyeon found herself asking.

“It’s not, unless Jess thinks it is but how is that even possible right?”

Jessica couldn’t understand the man. It pricked her conscience each time Taecyeon was nice to her. She would have liked it more if Taecyeon would scold her, maybe even just hit her than to have him being extraordinarily nice to her when she didn’t deserve it at all. She didn’t know what to say, and so she nodded again.

“If it’s really okay with you…” Taeyeon said in a small voice.

“Your company’s great to have, Taeyeon. I’ve some new games on my PS4 anyway. Maybe you can try them and let me know if they’re fun.” Taeyeon wondered if Taecyeon had always been so nice. Suddenly, she wasn’t so sure if getting back with Jessica was a right decision made.

Maybe, Jessica deserved a man like Taecyeon. But, letting go of Jessica was not an option. It would never be. Taeyeon would never be able to let her go again.

***

Jessica sat herself down on the floor, and then she waited for Taecyeon to close the door to their bedroom and join her on the floor before she finally said, “Maybe we should get a divorce, Taec.”

Taecyeon’s eyes widened as he stared at the girl. “What? Why?”

Jessica was unable to look at Taecyeon. Instead, she stared into space in front of her. “You don’t deserve this. You know you don’t deserve this, especially from me.”

“Especially from you or whoever or whatever. Just what do I not deserve?” Taecyeon asked as he furrowed his brows.

“This entire…me and Taeyeon thing. It’s just… I’m sorry Taec…”

“So, we get a divorce and you and Taeyeon can get together and be official or something?” Something about the calmness in his voice scared Jessica more.

Jessica’s eyes met Taecyeon’s in slight panic. “No! Taec you know that wasn’t what I meant. Taeyeon and I will never be able to become ‘official’. I just don’t want to drag you along into this mess… Okay, I don’t deserve you Taec. I don’t deserve you being nice to me. It kills me inside every time you’re nice to me.”

“Are we back to this again? Just because you’re in love with someone else, I can’t be nice to you? We didn’t get married— I didn’t marry you for love Jessica. You won’t be able to really get together with Taeyeon even if we’re divorced. In fact a sudden divorce will only bring you more bad than good. What’s wrong with what we have now? We’re still continuing this fake marriage, and you get to be with Taeyeon. No one knows anything and we’re all okay.”

“You’re okay but I’m not, Taec!” Jessica raised her voice a little as she frowned at the man. “You don’t know how it feels like. You keep saying that it’s okay but it’s just— It’s not okay…”

Taecyeon looked at the tears that were threatening to spill from Jessica’s eyes and unknowingly swallowed his saliva. He took a deep breath, before he asked, “Are you scared that you’re hurting me?” The first stream of tears rolled down Jessica’s cheek as she nodded. “What if I tell you that doing this stupid divorce thing is going to hurt me more?”

“What…?”

“We’ve been…” Taecyeon wanted to explain, but he suddenly felt tears choking him. He cleared his throat as he pressed his lips together, and then he tried again. “We’ve been here for each other for as long as I can remember and…you don’t have to be lovers to feel a sense of attachment.” He wasn’t lying. They weren’t lovers. He loved Jessica, but Jessica didn’t love him. “I don’t know what it’s like if…if…” He bit his upper lip as his own tears welled up in his eyes. “If I’ve to come home to an empty house every day. If I don’t get to see just someone waiting for me to get home so that she can talk about the crazy things that happened during work. A friend, a soulmate, at least, it’s someone.”

Jessica looked away from her husband as her tears fell seamlessly. She had rarely seen him cry. The last time she saw him cry, it was when their elderly neighbor in the States had passed away. But this time, he was crying because of her.

“I’ve…forgotten what it’s like to be alone, Jess…” Taecyeon continued with his tears falling silently. “It scares me. It scares me so can we please…not get a divorce…?”

Jessica didn’t know what made her turn back to look at Taecyeon before she nodded. She didn’t know what made her wrap her arms around the man before she patted his back. She didn’t know what made her heart wrench so badly. She didn’t know what made her want to stop the man’s tears so much.

But, she knew.

She knew what Taecyeon was talking about. She knew how Taecyeon’s existence had become a comfort to her. Before Taeyeon came back into her life, she knew how she and Taecyeon had managed to fix each other because they knew exactly how similarly broken they both were. But what was she to do, when Taecyeon told her that a divorce would hurt him more? Just what was she to do?

***

Taecyeon woke up alone on his bed the next morning. He wasn’t going to complain. Afterall, he had been the one who told Jessica to accompany Taeyeon who was sleeping in the guest room. Letting out a sigh, he got up and proceeded to wash up before he went on to make some breakfast for all three of them.

He ate his share and then he left the rest in the microwave. Wanting to tell the two girls who were still asleep about the breakfast, he gently knocked on their door. When there was no reply, he opened the door out of habit but his face fell when he saw the girls. Jessica was asleep with a peaceful expression on her face as she lay safely in Taeyeon’s embrace.

Dejectedly, he closed the door.

Jessica’s rightful place was in Taeyeon’s arms. There was never a place for him.

Taecyeon took a huge breath before he tried to shake off the thoughts. Then, he picked up his briefcase and left for work. He wasn’t sure if he would be able to focus at work that day with such a heavy heart.

He had barely driven for twenty minutes when his phone rang. Seeing that it was his mother, he mindlessly picked it up.

“Yes mom?”

“Taecyeon, I’m reaching your place in about five minutes’ time. I brought you some supplements that your aunt brought back from Japan,” came the reply, much to Taecyeon’s horror.

“What?! Mom we’re not at home. Why don’t you bring it another day?” Taecyeon replied, totally flustered.

“Silly boy, did you forget that I know the code to your house?” The laughter that followed didn’t soothe Taecyeon’s heart at all.

“No but—”

“No more ‘but’s. We’re already entering the compound.”

[A/N] 9/5/2015

Oops, apologies because this chapter took a little longer than I'd expected. Emotional conflicts are on the high in this one. I know this "love triangle" is bringing some of you pain and frustration but trust me, it's not like I'm extending this situation on purpose. Let's just be a little bit more patient and we'll see, yeah?

And so...my personal favourite moment - You're okay. Baby we're okay. What's yours? Write me something, anything. :)