16 Years Ago (Age 19)

Dear Yixing,

Got your postcard. I know it's been a while.

My grandpa died last month. It feels strange to write that, almost as strange as him not being around anymore. I miss him a lot, but you know what's stranger? Every time I sat down to start writing a letter, I would want to tell you all about these random moments in my life that were fun or funny, and I couldn't do any of that because, my grandpa died. And it feels strange to write you up out of the blue and begin with that statement: my grandpa died. You didn't know him.  It doesn't affect your life, even though it affects mine. I don't need consolation right now. It feels kind of like second nature that I can share this 'fact' with you. But isn't it strange? (I'm using that word too much, 'strange', but whatever.) You open up a letter and read about the death of someone you don't know...

Or maybe it isn't strange because we've known each other for so many years, but then you don't 'know' me either in a physical, personal way. 

(I could be a serial killer who murdered the real Chanyeol years ago and you'd never know!)

What if I died though. Would you know? How would you know. I won't be able to write and tell you. Maybe I should write down your address somewhere big on my wall and say, 'Write to Yixing, if I die please. Thank you.' I'm going to talk to my parents at least. But what if our house burns down and we all die? Then there's no one to tell! You'll just stop getting letters one day and eventually it'll be second nature to not expect a stranger's letters from Korea. 

This is morbid. Sorry, I've been thinking about death a lot. I promise I'm not really this depressed in real life.

End rant. Happy letter next time (if there is a next time!)

Chanyeol

Dear Chanyeol,

I sincerely hope you are alive and well, or else I'm writing this letter for absolutely no reason. Don't be dead, please. Because then I won't have anyone to write to. :)

Feel free to rant whenever you want to. I feel like half my middle school and high school years all I ever did was talk about weird stuff to you, and all you ever told me were what new toys you got for your birthday or how many girls this week thought you were hot. So consider this payback! Wait that doesn't make sense. Nevermind.

I'm going to be weird this time and send you a real picture of myself. Or at least me and my two new (apparently) best friends. The guy on the left is Joon (shortened nickname now) and the right one is Henry. Don't get any erted thoughts just because they're both kissing me on the cheek. I couldn't stop them in time before the flash (stupid timed cameras) and turns out that was the best picture of me the whole trip. 

It feels weird to have close friends, especially since I haven't known them long. Guess road trips force you really bond. Being suite mates help too, and I like them even more because they piss off Brian by always barging in through the bathroom door so he's always taking himself (and his girlfriend) out somewhere else. Hooray! Little victories.

They're already talking about making another road trip up through California and Oregon this summer. Which is two weeks away. Okay so the guys are pretty spontaneous. 

Your friend Yixing, the traveler

P.S. I gave Joon your address too just in case I die. *wink*

Dear World Traveller,

When are you making a road trip to Korea? (Just kidding)

Hooray for friends! Hooray for friends who burst in on Brian's... whatever he does. Wow when did you grow up and get so cute though? Wait, we both have dimples. That kind of bothers me. Do the girls over there think it's cute? They do here. I have a feeling though if we stood up next to each other they might find you cuter though. Oh wait, but I think I have the height on you, so no, I'm not worried! Even if my ears still stick out...

Thanks for the cheery letter. At least we have some insurance on each other in case we die! (That shouldn't sound cheerful, and yet it is. Haha!)

Having friends is a great thing. I should know. I have... well, less friends now than I did in high school. At least I still hang out with Jongin every few weeks. Our college life makes it kind of difficult, and since he's some kind of dance major he's always doing stuff after hours. And then there's me: boring old business degree classes. What am I even taking? I don't know. I forget everything the second I close the textbook.

Did I tell you I got smashing drunk last week? (Of course I haven't. I would remember writing you if I did). We we went out with some old high school buddies, and I drank too much (wow, cool) and apparently I was hollering about 'the good old times' and even your name came up. They didn't know who the hell you were. Guess I never told them I had a penpal. Since... we were 5.

I just bowed 90 degrees in the direction of California. I'm sorry! Do your friends know? That you have a "super secret" friend across the ocean that you can spill your whole life story too?

Wow this letter got weird real fast.

Bye now,

Chanyeol

Dear Chanyeol,

It must just be you because I tell everyone I know about my penpal from across the seas. And that he's a giant fairy who grants wishes and... yeah, no I haven't. Although since you brought it up I told Joon, and he thought it was kind of neat. He was assigned a penpal when he was in elementary too, but they stopped writing after a few years. I guess you and me are just bound to be together. 

I mean, bound to always write. Yup, this is getting weird.

By the way, would it be weird if we ever got to speak in person? Like, what do you sound like? Can you even speak English? Without an accent? Because some people I know are good reading and writing and can't talk out loud. Should we exchange phone numbers? Wait, how expensive are long distance phone calls? I think we have a plan for international calls, because sometimes my mom talks to her cousins in China. Here's the number for my land line. 714-xxx-xxxx I feel weird setting this up now... but I go home most Sunday evenings. Maybe we could talk some day.

Still your longest friend though,

Yixing

P.S. Joon says hi. Is that weird? You don't know him. But sometimes I talk to him about you.

*static*                                        

"Hello? He...hello? Can I talk to Yixing?"                                        

                                        *static*

                                        "Hello. This is his mother. Who is this?

                                        -

                                        -

"Oh. Hello. This is Chanyeol. I am a friend of Yixing."                                        

                                        "Oh. Wait please... [Yixing!]"

                                        -

                                        -

                                        -

                                        -

                                        -

                                        -

                                        -

                                        -

                                        "Hello?"

"Hi. This is uh... Chanyeol. You gave me your number..."                                        

                                        "Ahhh! Chanyeol! So you called!

"Yes..."                                        

                                        -

                                        -

                                        -

                                        "Well this is cool."

"Uh, yes."                                        

-                                        

-                                        

"So, how are you?"                                        

                                        -

                                        -

                                        "I am good. And you?"

-                                        

-                                        

-                                        

"Me? I am good. Too. I'm good too."                                        

                                        "Oh that's good."

"Yeah."                                        

"Uhm"                                        

                                        "Uh..."

                                        -

                                        -

                                        -

"Yeah this is weird. Hearing you."                                        

                                        *laughter*

                                        "Yes, it is. Oh well. So, how was your day? Is your day? How is your day?"

                                        "It is okay. It just started for me actually. It's morning here."                                        

                                        "Oh that's cool. Any uh... plans?"

"Yeah. Some..."                                        

Hooray we have contact!

Aren't the first phone conversations with strangers always awkward? I still really love how awkward they are, both in letters and now on the phone. But I guess it won't always be that way, huh?

Rosie