warning: if you're not in the right mood -drama, romance, etc- do not read or you might vomit. you've been warned :'D

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He was panting like never before; but he didn't give a damn. For all he cared he could die of lack of oxygen right now and it wouldn't matter. The traffic was hell at that hour, he couldn't make it home in ages if he went with any kind of four-wheeled device. After storming out from Yoochun's office like that, all he wanted to do was to speed his way home and the road was making him rage so bad that he had parked his car to a random somewhere and just started to run his way home. He knew it would take more than half an hour even while he was running like wolves were chasing him; but it was still faster than trying to get past this traffic in his car. He just had to be home as soon as possible. Enough was enough. 

He didn't stop until he reached the apartment complex and even then, didn't stop until he was in the elevator, ignoring all the weird looks his neighbours were giving him. He leant his hands on his knees, trying to get his breathing together as the elevator moved up. He dashed out when he heard the familiar ring of the elevator indicating it had arrived, fumbled with the keys muttering curses under his breath and dashed inside the house the second the door was open.

"YEOJIN!" he yelled, running to the living room, then to the kitchen. Seeing nobody was there, he ran into her room. She wasn't there either; but he could hear the shower running so without thinking he barged in from the bathroom door, accompained by a shrill scream from inside.

"YEOJIN!!" 

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN MY BATHROOM?!" 

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!"

"WHAT HAVE I DONE?! GET OUT!!"

"YOU'RE PREGNANT?!"

"IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!!" 

"NONE OF MY BUSINESS??!" 

"JUST GET OUT OF MY BATHROOM KIM JAEJOONG!!" 

"IT'S NOT SOMETHING I NEVER SAW WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL?!"

There was another shrill raged scream from behind the shower curtain, Jaejoong closed his ears and grimaced.

"GET THE OUT!!" 

"IF YOU DON'T PROMISE TO TALK TO ME AFTER YOU'RE OUT, I'M NOT MOVING AN INCH!" 

"FINE, just, get out already!" 

"You promised!" Jaejoong said and got out of the bathroom. He went to the living room and plopped down on the couch with a deep sigh. He took a few moments to calm down, then leaned back on the pillows and covered his eyes with his arm.

"What do you mean she doesn't want, what is that supposed to mean?"

"It means, my dear retarded friend, that you're so bad as a husband that she doesn't want anything to remind her of that night." 

"Oh shut up I bet I wasn't that bad- but please could you be ing more open, my brain is shorting out here!" 

"That's why I call you retarded. Alright, I'll start over. I had no idea she was your wife when she came in so I treated her like I did to any othe-"

"Skip that part, I got that first time you told me." 

"Okay, so when I did tell her she was indeed pregnant, she got sad instead of happy. She told me how much of a horrible bastard you are and-"

"Don't mix your own thoughts into this!!" 

"Okay okay, I got it!! I'm serious this time. She thinks you hate her. She hates herself for giving herself to someone who hates her and she thinks the baby will be miserable with a dad who doesn't give a about it so she wants abortion and just so you know, I did give her a date. She also wants a divorce the second she can without damaging both compaines and hurting his father." 

"...that bloody IDIOT!!" 

She hated him, thought he hated him so she hated the baby. That was it? He didn't like the situation, not even the slightest. It hurt to think she would go to such lengths because of his previous actions. True, he was no epitome of innocence; but still it was just... it hurt and he wasn't going to take it. He wasn't going to leave any misunderstandings or any words unsaid. Fixing it or ruining it, it didn't matter anymore. He just wanted everything to be clear between them. He didn't care what he had to do, he had cast away his pride and he could everything as long as she stopped to listen to him and agreed to think again. He didn't mind anything she would say to him, he had probably deserved everything she could ever say and all he could offer was his apology and his heart for the rest of his life. He didn't want their unborn child to suffer because of him, too. That child could be the most beautiful baby on the earth, she would be most treasured, happiest and Jaejoong would give her everything he ever could; he couldn't let Yeojin harm an innocent life just because of his own idiocy, useless pride and the hurt he had caused her. If she still had it in her to love him, even if it was just a tiny bit, he would make her fall for him so hard, he would sweep her feet off the ground and make her feel like she was in a dream. If only he could convince her to open her heart to him again... 

He sighed and leaned forward again, resting his elbows on his knees and looking down. It took her a while to come into the living room. She looked cold as always; but it was somehow different with her pink teddy bear printed pajamas on. She sat on the couch across the one he sat, pulled her legs to her chest and wrapped her arms around her knees. There was a silence as she simply watched him, leaning her chin on her knees. 

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jaejoong said in the end, unable to look her in the eye. 

"I found out only today. How did you learn?" Yeojin said.

"I... was suspicious something was up, so I followed you." Jaejoong confessed. There was no point in hiding anything, he didn't want any secrets left between them anyways. 

"How did you learn?" she repeated. 

"The doctor was my friend, he told me when I asked... the one you heard me talking to." he explained further. 

"Oh." she said simply. 

"Why..." he started; but he felt a lump in his throat so he stopped and took a deep breath before he continued. "Why do... you want an abortion?" 

There was another silence. Jaejoong looked up to her face; but she was looking away. The sadness in her face was so apparent that he wanted to just reach out and wipe it away... yet it was him that caused it in the first place. He felt his heart ache again. 

"It wouldn't have a nice life... with a mother who hates herself and a father who despises anything about them; I don't want my child to experience that... I don't want it to be an unwanted result of a mistake. If I can't give it the love it deserves-"

"How can you say that?" Jaejoong said softly, unable to wait for her to finish her sentence. She turned her gaze back on him at his words. He looked pained; so much that she almost wavered. 

"It's not like I love doing it..." she mumbled, "With everything that happened, the choice was apparent though."

"I don't detest you. I wouldn't let her feel unwanted ever and if you can't give her the love she deserves just because you think you slept with a man who doesn't love you; I'll love her twice as much to cover up for that. She is our baby..." he said before he had to stop again because of the same lump in his throat that made it hard to breathe and made his eyes burn. 

"She..?" Yeojin mumbled, looking down. When she broke the eye contact, Jaejoong looked down as well. He took a deep breath to calm down; but it was almost impossible to suppress the tears he had been pushing back all the time. 

"I don't hate you... I never did, despite what I said I never hated you. I've been a true jerk, I've been horrible to you; I don't even have the right to apologize for that. I wanted to push you away, my excuse was that the marriage was forced on me even though it made no sense. It wasn't my first arranged marriage date, I could have said no if I wanted to yet I didn't... I liked you even when we first met. I could never admit this; but I just wanted to see what you could do to my dull life. I wanted to see that you wouldn't leave like mother did, I wanted you to prove father wrong... and in time, before I even realised, you became everything I was looking forward to. I looked down on everything you did, ignored them, acted cold; but every day I was secretly looking forward to seeing what you would be up to next. I was too proud to admit it, I never could speak a word about it to anyone; I couldn't even tell that to my best friend. I only told him what I was trying to make myself believe. He knows me too good to buy it; but I couldn't be convinced. I thought it wouldn't change. I thought you would forever stay that way... it's retarded; who puts up with it when all that happens is constantly getting hurt? It was too late when I realised all this. When I could finally admit all this to myself I had already lost you. Ever since then I've been trying... like you once did for me, I'm trying for you. I know how you felt all the time now and it hurts to know I made you feel like that. Nothing I did for you since then was a show just to trick you or anything. Not even a word I spoke that night was an act. I didn't lie to you... I didn't do that to use you; I really just wanted to be with you, I wanted to hold you, kiss you... I wanted to love you, I wanted you to feel it. It wasn't just anything to me. Can you still not see it? How can you still say that I despise you?" 

Jaejoong wiped at his eyes, though it was futile with all the drops rolling down from his eyelashes to the carpet relentlessly. He couldn't do anything to stop it anymore, he couldn't even stop his body from shaking. He took a shaky breath and continued in a more hushed voice.

"I don't know if you can forgive last year and everything that happened; but at least you can stop hating yourself, right? You didn't give your first time to someone who detests you whatsoever. You were drunk out of your mind, that's still true; but... it was with some stupid man who doesn't even know how to show his love for you, that's at least better... right?" Jaejoong sobbed softly at the end, squeezing his eyes shut ad gritting his teeth to stop the tears. He didn't want to be this pathetic fool, he had wanted to talk everything out with Yeojin, not cry like a kid in front of her and confess. He was the one in the wrong; he needed to explain things and make her understand, not just sob like this...

His eyes snapped open when he felt her arms wrap around his shoulders. The warmth of her body leaning against his back made even more of the stupid tears flow out. Even though she hadn't said a word yet, he felt like he could breathe easier now. He turned around and wrapped his arms around the waist of the angel kneeling next to him on the couch and buried his face in her stomach. Her fingers threaded themselves in his hair as he quietly breathed in her scent and gradually calmed down. When he could bring himself to, he pulled away slightly, leaned his forehead on her stomach and closed his eyes.

"How can you think of hurting her..?" he almost whined, "Our little baby..."

"You already decided it's a girl?" she chuckled softly. 

"Of course it is! She'll be beautiful as her mother." he said, smiling slightly and her stomach gently. "How can you think of hurting such an angel? Even if she wasn't planned, she isn't a mistake... she's a blessing."

Yeojin sat down so she was at his face level and cupped his cheek in her hand. 

"And whose fault is that?" she said. He looked at her face and blinked for a second before looking away, ashamed. 

"Mine... I'm sorry..." he mumbled. She made him look at her again.

"Do you really mean it..? Everything you said... I'm almost tempted to believe you." she said. His heart skipped a beat. 

"Every word of it." he said and cupped her face in his hands, looking into her eyes. "I love you, Kim Yeojin. I really, really do. You have no idea how I hate myself for every time that I hurt you. You have no idea how much it hurt... when I learned you wanted to harm our baby because of me." he couldn't hide the pain in his voice when he spoke about that. He caressed her hair gently. "If you just decide to believe me, I can bring heaven to your feet. I can love you like no other ever can. I can make it so you'll laugh at all the time we lost never speaking to each other. I can make you forget how to cry. All I want... I want to see your smile and hear you laugh every day of my life, that's all I'll ever ask for. That's just how much I love you."

"That sounds like the most tempting lie I've ever heard." Yeojin smiled. He could see both hesitation and wish in her eyes. She wanted to believe; but she was having a hard time with it. It was no wonder, he thought.

"No lies. I've had enough of them." he shook his head, "I have no right to ask you to forgive me right away... but can you at least promise to try?" 

"I guess I can do that." Yeojin said softly after short. Jaejoong smiled and planted a soft, lingering kiss on her lips. He wanted to tell her that she wouldn't regret; but her eyes half-closed when he pulled back, her breath so sweet and lips so soft, he couldn't help but kiss her one more time. This time it lasted longer, more passionate, more real; possibly the first real kiss they shared that they both remembered. When Yeojin finally broke the kiss for air, they were both breathless. Jaejoong chuckled softly and pulled her close to himself to bury his face in her hair. He wanted to drown in her scent and die in her arms after seeing their grandchildren grow up, when they both had more wrinkles than they could count if they tried. He took in a deep breath and sighed. 

"Can I sleep with you tonight?"

***

"Wanna bet on it?"

"Oh come on, I told you it's just stress!" 

"That's what nonsense you were spouting last time too..." 

"YAH!"

The man laughed as the woman smacked him in the arm. The woman was pouting in a playful way, pretend angry. He rubbed his arm and watched her sulk with a wide smile on his face. It had been three years since he had won her heart; he had made everything he had promised true. She hadn't cried even once since then; he loved her like his heart could burst anytime and there wasn't a day he passed without seeing her smile or hearing her laugh. It was precious. 

"What? Am I wrong?" the man chuckled.

"Okay you might be a little right but I need to remind you that it's highly improbable." the woman said, trying to keep her cool. 

"Impossible is nothing, I'm telling you. Jiwoon's little brother is on the way." the man insisted. 

"Oh so you even know the gender of it?!" the woman said. The man nodded.

"Was I wrong last time?" 

"I'm still saying it's just stress." 

"Then the bet is on. If I'm right, you have to go on that trip with me and if you're right, I have to do one thing you ask me to, whatever it is."

"Don't go on deciding things by yourself!!" 

"What, are you scared?" the man teased with a half-smile the woman had never been able to get used to since the first time she had seen it. It still made her heart beat two times faster and put a blush on her cheeks. She huffed.

"Fine, it's on!" 

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OTL hope you liked the ending. please comment? :') i have a feeling the whole story was much better at the first chapters and got kinda boring towards the end. i'd like to hear what you guys think.