"Why won't you accept any help from me?!" Jaejoong yelled the next day, in frustration. Again, as every day, she was glued to the toilet because of the nausea, even though she couldn't throw up even if she wanted to. He was close to exploding, really, he just couldn't take it anymore. One whole week of sickness even after she went to doctor and she was still only telling him to stay away. 

"I don't need help!" she said stubbornly. He ran his hands through his hair. 

"You've been throwing up constantly for so long and you say you went to the doctor last week yet I was wondering if I should take you to ER yesterday! And you say you're okay? You're okay?! I'm not a monster, Yeojin I just want to help you!" he yelled in frustration. 

"I told you I don't need it! After all this time now is when you decide to care." she snorted, flushing the toilet and going to wash her face. 

"Why?! What have I done for you to hate me this much? Enough for you to just push me away when all I do is try to help out?!" Jaejoong asked, flustered. He felt helpless and desperate... and angry. He felt mad. Mad and rejected.

"What have you done, indeed." Yeojin said, sarcastically. "Nice to finally ask yourself that after a whole month."

"I did nothing, nothing you didn't want me to. Nothing you didn't like me to. You didn't push me away, in fact it was the opposite." Jaejoong said.

"Oh so you actually know what I'm talking about! Good for you, genius." Yeojin said. Jaejoong grabbed her arm just as she was about to leave. It made Yeojin give him a dirty glare. "Let me go." 

"Not until you tell me why. Why? What did I do? It's not like I you or abused you; you wanted it. You liked it, you were begging for more. Then you go ahead and treat me like a piece of - fine, I'm used to that, alright; but you refuse any help from me even if you're feelinglike death. What exactly did I do for you to detest me to such lengths? I can't just sit down and take this anymore!" 

"Well you'll have to; because that's all you're getting." Yeojin said and shook her arm free of his grasp. "You wanna know why? I'll tell you why. I'm ashamed of myself for falling so low as to sleep with someone who despises me and who I am and doesn't mind telling people that - losing my first time to a man like that, drunk out of my mind is just humiliating. And yeah that was . I don't even remember anything from that night; if I was in my right state of mind, I'd have kicked you right in the balls so it doesn't matter whatever the I did as you took adventage of me like that."

"I was drunk too, you know? And even though I can barely remember the night, I know that I would never force anything on you!" Jaejoong said. 

"Did you not hear me? You took adventage of me. Forcing yourself on me or not doesn't change that fact. You're the proof I was low enough to give myself to someone who despises me. Just seeing you makes me sick to my stomach. If you really wanna help me out, don't show me your face for a while, thank you very much." 

Jaejoong stood there as she stormed out of the room. As she left, he heard her mutter to herself.

"And if my brother lived, he'd be our little baby angel no matter what, that's what a family is." 

He blinked, having a hard time understanding what she was talking about; but soon it dawned on him. She had heard that too. She had heard his comment that night, when she had told him about her mother and the little brother they had lost. He had said that maybe he was lucky to have died. Alright he was being stupid about that; life was precious and worth living no matter what. And saying that was simply rude; it was obvious she would be sensitive about that matter. No matter what he thought, it was awful to just speak it out so harshly. Moreover, the boy would have been okay in a family like theirs, no matter what the condition. But that wasn't the main problem here. 

Just as he had guessed, she thought of that night as . She hated him for doing such a thing. She didn't care if he was drunk or if she liked it, she didn't remember anything of the night. She just felt bad about it... and she thought that he despised her. 

It was sad; but inevitable. She had heard him talking to his friend on the phone and that was all he had said. But could she still think he felt like that, after everything he had done for her? After he tried so much to be good on terms with her again, was it so easy to believe he hated her, really? But she was hurt deeply by those words; so much that she had cried. It wasn't hard to understand she couldn't get over them so easily. He gritted his teeth and cursed himself. He should have told her it was wrong! He should have told her that he didn't despise her, that she was hurting for nothing... he was such an idiot! But it was too late. He wasn't sure if she'd have believed him with how much she was hurting now, anyways. Maybe it was better to lay low and let her calm down first. Yeah, it probably was. 

So he did.

Next morning, he went next to her secretary. The woman told him that Yeojin was busy, he had already guessed that much; but the plan wasn't to see her. It was to talk to her secretary.

"No, it's okay, I don't want to disturb her when she has work. She just hasn't been well, you must know; but I'm busy too so I can't take care of her as I'd want... can you make sure she eats enough and takes her meds? I'm worried for her." he said. He didn't even have to fake the worry in his voice and face, he only had to let his feelings show and it came naturally. 

"Of course." the secretary he didn't know the name of smiled understandingly. 

"That silly girl never takes enough care of herself when she has work." he said with a gentle smile, looking at her door. "She didn't even tell me last time she went to doctor because she thought she would bother my work." 

"She's a kind person." the woman said. Jaejoong chuckled and looked at the secretary.

"Of course she is, she's my angel." he smiled, "I'm just wishing she wouldn't push herself so hard... she mentioned she'd visit doctor again, I hope she really does that; but she'd scold me if I told that to her one more time." 

"I could remind her instead?" the woman offered. Jaejoong smiled gratefully.

"That would definitely be good." he nodded.

"And, um... would you like to know if she does go?" her secretary said. Jaejoong blinked.

"Well I guess it'd be nice if you won't be bothered. I don't want to seem like a prying worrywart, being just a worrywart is more than enough" he said with a soft smile. The secretary shook her head.

"No, of course there's no bother. I'll make sure to tell you." she said. Jaejoong nodded.

"I'll really appreciate that. I'll be going now, make sure to take good care of her in my stead, alright?"

"Got me that." the secretary nodded seriously. Jaejoong smiled and left the place. Now that was one down. He didn't need to see Yeojin's face to know she was alright now. Her secretary would do that job for him. All that was left now was to silently do small things for her; like cook something light and easily digested and leave it in the fridge or "forget" some water in her room when she wasn't home. Stuff she wouldn't be so suspicious about. He was sure that she wouldn't take that easily; but he wasn't going to sit back and do nothing either. 

It worked out fine, much to his surprise. He had thought that she wouldn't eat the stuff he left at the fridge; but she did. She didn't question it that much, it seemed. He wondered if he could do more for her that she would take easily; but he wasn't sure if she had forgotten enough to accept anything more obvious yet so he stuck to what he was doing. In about a week, he got a call from her secretary.

"Mr Kim? This is Siyeon, your wife's secretary." the woman said kindly. Oh, so that was the name! 

"Ah, yes I remember, Miss Siyeon." Jaejoong said. 

"Oh I'm glad. I called to tell you about your wife like you asked." she said. 

"Is there something wrong?" Jaejoong said instantly, worried before he even knew it. 

"Nonono, I just called to tell you that she has asked me to get an appointment from her gynecologist today. I don't know if it is related to her health problems, but..." the woman mused. Jaejoong blinked. Gynecologist? Why gynecologist?

"D-did she tell you why?" he stuttered. 

"No, she didn't. She asked me to get the appointment in my name, I assumed she didn't want you to know before she knew for sure; but I thought I should let you know she asked for an appointment..." the secretary trailed off... 

"Knew for sure what... wait what- WHAT?!" Jaejoong said the last word so loudly that his own secretary knocked on his door. 

"Is everything alright, Mr Kim?" 

"Yeah, it's alright Kyojung, don't mind me, go back to your work!" he said, closing the phone with his hand, then when he was sure she was gone, he returned to the call. "Again. What?"

"Uhm, well Ms Kim would tell you if there's anything; I'm taking good care of her and she's going to doctor today. There I told you now. Good work, Mr Kim!" 

"WAIT!" Jaejoong yelled again; but the line was cut. He bit his lip. What was this supposed to mean? Okay he knew what this was supposed to mean alright; but how could this be? She had her period just a day before that had happened, it was basically impossible. Right? She would have taken precautions if this was possible. Right?! He had to find out. He had to, alright this was going to sound sick but, stalk her. 

He had no idea where Yeojin's usual gynecologist was - why would he even know? He never had a reason to. Until now. He tried to call her secretary to take the address; but the line was busy. Of course it was, they were busy. He had to find out somehow; but he couldn't just go and ask. 

He waited until the lunchbreak and everyone was out to eat before he took off to her office. The place was empty, the secretary was nowhere to be seen and the notebooks were lying defenseless on the table. He quickly picked one to check out when the appointment was. It was written down as just "doctor" at 7pm. But who?! He groaned and started looking for a phone book. It took him a while to find it; but then he realised that he didn't know what the name of the place was. He ran his hand through his hair and the PC screen. He searched in the schedule there; but there was no record there either. He started rummaging through all the papers on the table, until he saw a familiar looking number written on a post-it. 

"Dr. Park... well, nothing to lose!" he mused, looking at the name on the paper. He pulled out his phone and dialed the number; but stopped before he hit the call button. The auto-search on his phone had found an exact match of the number. He dropped the post-it back on the paper and frowned at the name on his screen. 

"Yoo...chun? For real? Her doctor is... what the heck?" he mused to himself. Well Yoochun was a good doctor indeed; but he wasn't sure he was comfortable with him being his wife's doctor. And again, that wasn't the main issue here. He knew that while at work, Yoochun left his phone with his secretary. He took off from the office and went to his own office and locked the door. He was doomed if this wasn't the number; but he was quite sure this was it. 

"Park Yoochun's phone, may I help you?" a kind voice answered when Jaejoong finally called. 

"Ah, hello; you're the secretary my sister talked to I assume? I wanted to confirm the time of her appointment today..." Jaejoong said. 

"I'm sorry, we don't usually share that information with anyone other than the patient herself, even if you're her brother." the woman said. Jaejoong's heart dropped; but he wasn't about to give up. 

"I understand why you would do that; but I want to only confirm because she asked me to, you just need to verify." what was the secretary's surname again? He remembered calling her Miss Han before... he decided to go with that. "The name is Han Siyeon and the appointment should be for 7pm today, as she said."

The woman stayed silent for short on the other end of the line, probably indecisive.

"That would be true, Mr Han." the woman said in the end. Okay, being called Mr Han was really weird; but he was supposed to be this Siyeon's brother right now, so he acted like nothing was wrong. 

"Great. Ah, and, when should she arrive? Fifteen minutes prior to the appointment would be alright, right?" he asked again. 

"Yes, that would be okay. Please do not be late; I'm afraid if our appointments don't arrive we accept other patients after five minutes." the woman said. Jaejoong hummed and nodded even though she couldn't see. 

"Of course, I understand. Thank you, I'll make sure to tell her that."

"You're welcome." 

Jaejoong was smiling victoriously as the line was cut. Now he had the time AND the place. All he had to do was to talk to Yoochun after Yeojin's appointment. He put his phone down and the screen of his PC. The best part was, he knew where the place was too. He wouldn't have a hard time with anything. All he had to do was to wait until Yeojin left for the appointment and he would take action. 

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kinda like a filler chapter? haha, iunno, i'm not quite satisfied with this one ^^;; hope you liked it, please comment!!