Chapter 12: I like the idea of your story. After reading the foreword, I was like -- 'I better read this'. But the story is kinda rushed, like you're summarizing it. I know how the character feels but I can't feel it since the setting changes very quickly. And the chapters are very short, really short.
My english is not perfect but its frustrating to read a fic with a lot of grammar mistakes. So take the advice of the comment below this.:)
Aw... I want to cry... this....................... looks good.......................................................................
BUT.
Your english . There are many grammar mistakes. Try to improve it. And when the time comes, please, re-write this. I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings but I'm just stating the truth. :(
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