I sighed with relief at the end of class, hearing the final bell ring. My first day had been exhausting, and I was ready to to home. I checked my phone, finding a new message buzzing on the screen. 
    How was your first day? ~ Dad
    I smiled, knowing how busy he was. He still found time to worry about me, it's so sweet. I sent him a quick smiley face and started walking home. I reached our large apartment and walked inside, feeling a wave of warmth hit my face from the kitchen. 
    "Hello?" I asked, putting down my bag. I smiled as a soft voice answered me. 
    "In here, Sujin-ah." Jia, my housekeeper and nanny, looked up as I walked in. She was in her late 30's, and had basically raised me. My mother had died when I was young, and my father was away a lot for work. 
    "Hello, Jia! How was your day?" I asked, setting down my backpack and wrapping her up in a hug. One of her hands the back of my head while the other continued stirring tonight's dinner. 
    "It was good! And how are you, my beautiful girl?" Jia smiled, the bracelets on wrists jingling as she picked up the pot of noodles and drained it in the sink. She was so pretty, with a round face and twinkling brown eyes. 
    "School was fun." I said, shrugging my shoulders. Jia grasped my chin gently, turning my head up. She frowned slightly, wrapping me up in another hug. 
    "What's wrong, baby?" Jia asked, making me sniffle unhappily. She pulled back, grasping my shoulders and looking at me. 
    "It's nothing, it's just that—" I broke off, wiping my eyes quickly and hanging my head. "Everyone else can do things like try out for sports, and meet boys and make friends. I can't do that, what's the point? I'll just move again." I said, feeling miserable. I really wanted to be friends with Tao and his friends, but I knew I couldn't. 
    "Oh, sweetheart. It's okay." Jia rubbed my back sympathetically, turning around and serving the food. "I know it's been hard. But sometimes you just have to take things day by day."     "I know. I'm sorry, Jia." I said, taking my plate and sitting down with Jia. She patted my hand, smiling as we ate. 
    "I know it's hard. You've never reacted like this before, did you maybe meet someone?" Jia asked with a knowing smile. I nodded, smiling myself. 
    "What's his name?" Jia asked with a laugh. I was grateful once again for Jia, who was as close as a mother. I could talk to her about anything, and I loved her a lot. She treated me like her own daughter, and I started laughing. 
    "Tao." I smiled. Jia repeated his name, tasting it, and smiling. She took another bite of noodles, nodding at me. 
    "Here's my advice. Become friends with Tao, don't distance yourself from him. Just let things happen naturally." Jia said knowingly, with a twinkle in her eye. 
    "But if I move again, what's the point of being friends?" I asked sadly, looking at Jia. She patted my shoulder gently, standing to clear the plates. I followed her lead, waiting for her to reply. She paused, thinking, and tapped her long fingernails on the counter.
    "Use your head. I trust you to make the right decision, trust yourself." Jia said. She tapped my head with a smile, sending me to my room to my homework. I nodded, realizing that I would have to trust myself. 
    I did my homework and crawled in bed, utterly exhausted. I closed my eyes, expecting sleep, but found I couldn't sleep. Images of Tao swirled in my mind, making me stay awake long into the night. I knew I really liked this boy. Which is why I couldn't let myself get near him.  

    I woke up early and dressed for school quickly. After eating breakfast with a sleepy Jia, I walked to school. Finding my locker, I got ready for my first class and kept my eyes out for Tao. My heart sped up when I saw him, making me smile as he led a very sleepy Lu Han through the halls. 
    He had ditched his glasses, but was wearing black pants and a white collared shirt with the sleeves rolled up. He flashed me a quick smile, walking up to my locker and letting Lu Han stumble blindly after him. 
    "Hi! How are you?" Tao asked, smiling brilliantly and tugging my braid gently. I smiled, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear. 
    "I'm good. How are you?" I asked, making Tao laugh. He always looked so happy all the time!
    "I'm good. Lu Han, not that way!" Tao yelled, seeing Lu Han start walking down the hall the opposite way. "Sorry, if I don't stop him, he'll just keep walking." I giggled, and Tao shot me an exasperated look. 
    "It's not funny." Tao said, sticking his tongue out when I laughed outright. "Lu Han! Stop walking!" Tao yelled. Lu Han's head jerked up and he shuffled to a stop. 
    "Wha'?" Lu Han said confusedly, slouching against my locker. Tao rolled his eyes, smacking Lu Han's head. 
    "Hey! Treat your hyung with respect, maknae!" Lu Han said, almost pulling off his authoritative tone. A large yawn interrupted him, making Tao smirk. 
    "Is he always like this in the morning?" I asked, making Tao laugh. He nodded, shrugging and shot me a 'what do you do?' kind of look. 
    "Come, maknae." Lu Han said, mustering his imperiousness for a moment and grabbing Tao's arm. For the first time, Tao actually frowned. He pouted, pulling his lips down and setting his feet. The bell rang, and Tao rolled his eyes. 
    "Ugh...fiiiiine!" Tao mumbled. He steered Lu Han off, making me smile. He looked back with a quick smile, opening his mouth wide. 
    "I'll save you a seat at lunch!" Tao yelled, and I nodded. Wait, wasn't I supposed to be avoiding him? Dang it...

    "Hey, Sujin!" Xiumin greeted me excitedly from his seat and I smiled. Lay greeted me just as gladly, and the rest of the boys all warmly acknowledged my existence. I even got a wave from Kris, who continued eating. 
    "Eat up." Tao playfully nudged my shoulder with a smile from his seat next to me. I nudged him back, then remembered I was supposed to be avoiding him. "What's wrong?" Tao asked. 
    "I have to go." I stood, grabbing my tray and walking outside. Tao shot me a concerned look, frowning after me. 
    I can't like him! Why is everything so complicated? Jia told me to just go for it with Tao. But what if I get hurt?
    "Sujin, are you okay?" Tao's voice made me turn, and I nodded. "You seem upset. Did I do something?" Tao asked. I took a deep breath, there was only one way to do this. 
    "You didn't do anything, I'm fine." I said. Tao smiled, pointing back toward the cafeteria. 
    "Do you want to go back?" Tao asked, taking my tray. I shook my head firmly, and his face fell. 
    "I think I'll just do some studying." I said, ducking my head. Tao smiled again, this time somewhat more shyly. 
    "Do you want help? I can show you the way to the library, and maybe we could do some studying?" Tao asked, rubbing the back of his neck and looking at me hopefully. 
    "No, I'll just go by myself. Thanks anyway." I turned abruptly, forcing myself to leave Tao behind. His face fell, and I walked quickly away before I had to watch more. 
    How can something so right feel so wrong?

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—Taoris95