SUHO

My phone kept ringing that morning. It was annoying, but I know I needed to answer it. What’s up with a phone call before morning breaks?

The caller ID says it’s my mom. “Hello, Mom. What’s the matter? It’s 4 in the morning.” I closed my eyes again and waited for my mom to answer.

“Mom, are you there?”

There was commotion on the other line. I can hear a woman’s voice other than my mom’s.

“Mom?”

“Oh, a-deul. Sorry about that. And…sorry for waking you up so early.”

Sheesh… like it’s not obvious.

“A-deul, your fiancé just arrive,” she said, so much happiness in her voice.

“What fiancé?” I asked.

“Don’t fool around, Jun Myeon-i! Yoon He Ra, your fiancé is here… in Korea. She just arrived here in Korea from Italy.”

Then, everything just SANK IN.

Right, I’m engaged. How can I forget that!

“WHAT!” I shouted.

“Hyung! Shut up!” Sehun yelled from across the room, then went back to sleep.

I walked out of the room and took deep breaths. Am I just hearing things? This is not right. The living room of our dorm was like as it was: messy and unsightly. I dumped myself on the dark blue couch and stared half-awake at the screen of the TV.

“A-deul? Are you OK?” my mom asked.

“How can I be OK if that’s the first thing I hear in the morning?” I told her.

“Well deal with it. You have to meet her in the hotel for dinner and…”

“Mom, I can’t. I have schedule,” I said, “I don’t even know when my free day is.”

“Work it out.”

Her voice shook the innards in me. She can be terrifying if she wants to.

“But Mom…”

“Jun Myeon!”

“It’s Suho now Mom.”

“Well not to me,” her voice was firm.

I heard a faint voice said, “It’s OK eomoni, it can wait.” It was He Ra for sure.

Yoon He Ra. You are a mystery to me. How can I be engaged to a girl I don’t even know. What year is it exactly? It’s the computer age but my parents are probably living in the old days.

Yoon He Ra. I haven’t seen you but you already bug me out. Why is it that I HATE you so much yet I don’t know a thing about you? Maybe because I’m facing the fact that I’m going to (POSSIBLY) marry you in the future, and (POSSIBLY) live with you for the rest of my life.

Yoon He Ra. You have a beautiful name but with deadly possibilities. I don’t want to know you. I kept on asking myself who are you to my parents that they chose you for me.

Yoon He Ra. You are the only thing that will keep me from my dream. I’m not going to waste my 7 years of training just for a girl. I’m not going to lose EXO for you.

Yoon He Ra. You are my hell.

“I’ll think about it,” I said and ended the call.

I stared at the ceiling for some time before I fell asleep again. I’m not going to waste my time thinking about Yoon He Ra. All of that can wait.

“Hyung, why did you sleep here?” Chanyeol said.

Half-awake, I stared at him just inches to my face. EXO was running around the dorm, getting ready for rehearsal in the agency. I must have been too tired to hear them in a hustle.

“It’s 10 already.”

My eyes widened. I smacked Chanyeol’s arm and said, “And you’re waking me up JUST now. Are you out of your mind?”

I stormed to our room. “Chanyeol you idiot.” I opened the closet to change clothes.

“Hyung!” he called. “Manager called earlier this morning. He said all your schedules are moved. You’re free for today.”

“What?!”

“You’re free today.”

“Why?” I asked.

“I don’t know. Ask him.” Chanyeol left me in room and headed back to the living room.

D.O. peeked at the door, eyes wide as usual. “What’s up?”

I’m confused. How can my schedule for today be moved?

“Hyung, you deaf?” D.O. said.

“You guys go ahead; I’ll be right behind you. I’ll just change clothes.”

D.O. left without another word.

How can this be?

“Suho-ya, we’re leaving. Bye.”

Luhan-hyung said with a smile.

“Hyung!” I called.

He stopped. He looked back and said, “Don’t worry, we’ll be fine. Besides, your fiancé is more important than today’s schedule. We’ll make sure the fans will not get bored even if you’re not around.”

Fiancé?

My eyes widened. “ Fian… fian…”

“I know, Manager-hyung told me.” He smiled again, and then left.

How can this be? THEY KNOW?

And with the last, “Bye, Leader!” from Chen, they all left me alone in the dorm.

YOON HE RA. You are my hell!

I kept on thinking the whole afternoon: “WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?”

Manager-hyung said I’m free all day, but I don’t know what I’m gonna do. And with the Yoon Hera thing hanging, I can’t think straight. I need air. I want to go out.

I wrapped myself as much clothing as I could so I’m not trampled by fans when I go out the street. Fans, I love them so much but there are times they’re just too much. Sometimes, I keep looking behind my back like they might be creeping behind me. but when I’m on stage and they’re cheering you on, their awesome!

There’s only one place in my head to go to right now: Han River.

My mom always takes me there to play when I was little. At times, my dad and hyung will come too, but that like once in a blue moon. Dad is always busy with work. Genesis Hotel in Seoul is the flagship hotel of the hotel chains, that’s where you can find him.

Hyung is just as busy as dad, getting management training because he’s going to inherit it in the near future. He’s also engaged, by the way, to the daughter of a telecommunication company. I’m really not into details about the two of them. But from what I heard, they are inseparable and started to like each other. Unlike me, I’m going to hate Yoon Hera, even if she did nothing wrong. Oh, wait, she did something wrong: being engaged to me!

The taxi stopped near the river. Families are gathering by the water, watching the ripples on the banks. It would be nice to have your family around, with the weather this nice.

I sat on a nearby bench and stared at the water.

Dad is not proud that I’m in the entertainment business. But with hyung as the inheritor of the Genesis, there’s nothing to argue. I don’t want it anyway. As long as I’m doing what I love to do, and that is acting and performing, I’m grateful.

Close by, a kid tripped and fell. I ran to help him.

“Are you okay, kid?” I said, but I was not the only one that said that.

A girl, about by age, was helping the kid stand up while I was looking at her.

“Next time, be careful okay?” she said with a smile.

“Yes,” the kid said, and walked away.

She looked at me. “Are you okay?” she asked.

“Yeah, I was just helping the kid, but I guess we both have the same intention,” I smiled, not knowing what to say.

“That’s fine. The more help, the better, right?” she smiled.

My heart melted.

Then, she looked at me intently. “You look familiar. Have I seen you before?”

Oops. Is she a fan? I need to get out of here!

“I don’t know,” I answered. “I have a very plain face, you know. Anyway, I need to go. It’s nice to meet you.”

She smiled. “It’s nice to meet you too.”

And I turned around and walked away. I walked away with her big brown eyes, curly long black hair, and innocent-sweet smile on my mind. It’s too early to say this is love, because I don’t know if love-at-first-sight really exist, but I’m definitely smitten.

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Crina~