Seohyun

“Hyunnie, mianhae…” Yoona eonni wrapped her arms around me as I broke down into tears in front of her. I could feel the warmth of her embrace once again. I had wanted to feel this warmth for years, and now that I could finally feel it again, my tears overflowed.

I couldn’t say anything as I sobbed harder. I leaned my head on her shoulder and hugged her back. I just couldn’t fight back the tears that kept flowing out of my eyes. All the feelings I have hidden all these years have flowed out and I couldn’t do anything about it.

“Hyunnie, if it’s okay with you, can we go inside?” She said while still trying to calm me down.

I could only nod silently as it was very hard to say anything without sobbing harder. I pulled myself out and grabbed eonni’s arm. I pulled her gently inside the apartment building. I still couldn’t stop sobbing, but I had managed to hold back the tears. Eonni was busy patting and rubbing my back gently to calm me down as we slowly made our way to my apartment room. Once inside the room, I stopped sobbing and we sat on the couch.

“Hyunnie…” eonni called softly.

I looked at her with my puffy eyes. She has grown into a beautiful girl, not the little kid I once knew anymore.

“Eonni, where have you been all these years?” I started first while holding not to burst into tears again. My voice was still cracked. “Wh…why did you have to run away?”

“I’m sorry, Hyunnie…” she could only frown.

“Why did you leave me alone?”

She went silent for a moment before she finally opened to speak.

“I thought that I had lost it all. I’d had enough. All my aunt did was gambling and drinking. Every time she went home drunk, she would shout at me and hit me. I had no one to turn to. I never knew where my parents were…” her eyes began to get teary.

“But you have me. Why didn’t you turn to me?”

“…”

I kept silent. I decided to hear her story first.

“Every night I locked myself in my room in the attic and prayed that my aunt wouldn’t barge inside without any reason just because she was drunk. I could hear shouting and loud banging every night she came home drunk. One night, she broke inside my locked room and pulled me by my arm forcefully and threw me against the bathroom floor. She locked me in there and shouted words that I didn’t know were curses. She let out her anger on me only because she lost in a game and got broke. I was suspended at school because my aunt was no longer handling my school fees. I told Mr. Kang not to tell you that I got suspended. And then I felt tired and weary, so I decided to run away. I took all of what was left in her gambling saving and packed away. Somehow I managed to sneak my way out of her reach,”

I didn’t know what to say. We were really small at that time. I’d never imagined her having to face this kind of life. On the outside, she was the brightest kid I’d ever known. As I listened to her story, I began to realize that no matter how close I said we were, there were many things I had no idea about her.

“Eonni…” I wanted to hug her as I saw a drop of tear flowed out of the corner of her eye, but she continued on so I restrained myself and let her continue.

“I’m sorry, Hyunnie…when I ran away, all I could think was getting away from her and ending all those horrible nights. But then I realized that I was getting farther away from you too. I was selfish, only thinking about myself. I didn’t even think about your feelings…” another drop of tear left her eye. “I hated myself for leaving you,”

“Eonni…” my teary eyes finally gave up from holding back. I hugged her and sobbed hard. “Eonni…don’t say that. I never knew you were suffering. We were so small that time. And every time we were together, it was like the whole world belonged to us. You always took care of me, protected me, and supported me. You always acted strong for my sake. I never knew you were also facing horrible hardships when we weren’t together. It was me who was selfish. I wanted to hate you ever since you left. And after 8 years, we finally meet again. All of my feelings that I kept for myself flooded out. I’m so sorry for slapping you earlier. It was a sudden burst of feelings that I had kept inside all this time. I’m so sorry, eonni…”

“Hyunnie…that’s okay. I deserve it. Mianhae,” she tightened her arms around me.

I stopped sobbing and tried to calm her down. I never knew she suffered so much. I felt horrible for hating her. I felt guilty for being so selfish, only thinking about my feelings. Once again I was selfish. First was about Yonghwa oppa and now Yoona eonni.

“Eonni, it’s my turn now. Let me take care of you…” I thought to myself as I felt the warmth of being inside her arms once again.

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The sky was so clear compared to the stormy afternoon yesterday. It was already afternoon, and we decided to grab some coffee at the nearest café and try to catch up with each other.

“Here you go, eonni.” I put the cups of coffee on the table as I came back to our table from the counter.

“Ah, gomawo Hyunnie~”

“Eonni…what are you doing here exactly?” I started the conversation.

“A year ago, I went back to Seoul to visit you at your old house but turned out that you weren’t there anymore. And then the current owner of the house told me everything she heard. I’m…I’m sorry about your parents…” her expression darkened.

I lived alone now because my parents had passed away. They were in a car accident right when they were going to pick me up at school in the evening because I had an extra piano course. It was the beginning of my first high school year back then. I went here after that to live with my cousin and the house back in Seoul was sold. But now I decided to live alone so that I could learn to take care of myself better, without the presence of my parents, even when my cousin’s house is still in the same town.  

“It’s okay, eonni. Thank you,” I smiled to her. “What have you been doing all these years? Did you really live alone?”

“At first, I was trying to live alone with all the cash I took away from my aunt. I barely survived each day. I would sleep on a bench in the park, or inside the station, or in front of closed shops. I got shooed by security guards countless times. When the cash was about to run out, a man approached me. He happened to be an owner of a foster home. He took me in. He introduced me to his wife and the kids in the foster home. Most of the kids were my age, so they welcomed me. They put me to school, paid for the expenses, and also gave me a place to stay, so I returned their favor by helping them in their business. I helped them design attire in their tailoring business. I’ve always been dreaming about being a fashion designer, you know that right?” She laughed.

“They gave me extra allowance every time I helped them. I saved all those allowance. I only thought about finding you. I always hoped that someday I can set off from the foster home and try to find you. And when I was in the middle school, the owner of the foster home took me to Busan to live with their relatives. I was like a daughter to them. I could feel love again after my parents gave me away to live with my abusive aunt and disappeared from my life. I stayed in Busan for the rest of my middle school years. When I graduated, my savings and deposits had become a mountain. I decided to start my move in finding you. And so I went back to Seoul to visit your old house,”

“I went here to live with my cousin after appa and eomma passed away. But now I live alone in my apartment even though my cousin’s house is still in this town,” I explained to her.

“I see. The owner of your old house also gave me a lead. She said that you went to this town after the house was sold to her. And so I continued my search. I came here and settled. I go to the Y.G. High School. I never stopped looking for you but for some reason I couldn’t find you, for a year and a half I couldn’t find any more lead. I was on the verge of giving up the search when I saw you walking down the streets alone, a year ago. I couldn’t believe my eyes that I finally found you. But guilt was still in my heart. I couldn’t face you yet,”

“And then you began to stalk me,” I laughed. “ssasaeng eonni!”

“Right!” She joined in the laughter. I could finally hear her alligator laugh once again. “Actually, I lived this past year trying to find courage to approach you. I knew you transferred to S.M. High School. It was only recently that I’d built up courage to stalk you. And finally now I can even see your smile again, Hyunnie~”

“Yoong eonni…I can’t express how much happiness that I could finally reunite with you…” my eyes began to get teary.

“Aw, Hyunnie~ Nado. Nado.” She gave me a really wide smile. “Hey, don’t get teary here, people will stare.” She chuckled.

It was like how I always dreamed of.  We were finally back at each other’s side. Talking, laughing, and enjoying the presence of each other. Covering each other with the warmth behind our smiles. It felt like the first day I spent with Yoong eonni in the kindergarten.

Just when we were enjoying sharing our stories, someone called me from behind.

“Seohyun-ah!”

I turned my back and saw Jonghyun oppa and Jungshin entering the café. I called them over to our table. When I turned back to Yoong eonni, her smile was fading slowly as her gaze was fixated at something. Her expression wasn’t shocked, though; more like amazed about something. I tried to follow her gaze. Doing so, I saw Jonghyun oppa.

“Seohyun-ah! What are you doing here?” Jonghyun oppa and Jungshin were already over our table.

“Just grabbing some coffee and enjoying an afternoon chitchat. I just met my long lost friend, you see.” I pointed towards eonni. “Jonghyun oppa, Jungshin-ah, meet Yoona eonni.”

Jonghyun oppa and Jungshin immediately bowed towards eonni.

“Annyeonghaseyo. Lee Jonghyun-imnida,”

“Annyeonghaseyo. Lee Jungshin-imnida,”

Yoona eonni rose from her seat and bowed back. Her expression was still the same with when she stared at Jonghyun oppa. “Annyeonghaseyo, Im Yoona-imnida.”

I told the two boys to have seat but they refused. And then Jungshin offered to take care of their order and then went to the counter.

“Seohyun-ah, are you okay now? I mean, after what happened yesterday…” Jonghyun oppa asked.

“Ah, I’m okay now oppa. Gamsahamnida.” I told him. “Why don’t you just take a seat here with us, oppa?”

“Ah, that’s not necessary, Seohyun-ah. We’re just grabbing some coffee for take away. We’ll be going back to our practice.”

“Oh, your band. I see,” I nodded my head, then I realized something. “Um, is oppa also practicing there with you?”

“Hmm, we asked him but he said he wouldn’t come this time. Well, I understand. It might be best for us to give hyung some time alone for now. I mean, after what happened yesterday…”

At the thought of that, I only nodded.

Not long after that, the two boys said their farewell and went back outside. When I went back to eonni, she was staring blankly at the door while smiling ear-to-ear like a lunatic.

“Wae, eonni? Why are you smiling like that?” I waved my hand in front of her eyes, trying to break off her trance.

“Ng? Mwo? Uh-huh, nothing,” she finally snapped out of it. “It’s just…the smile. That was the most beautiful smile I’ve ever seen…”

“Whose smile? Jonghyun oppa’s?” I guessed.

“Ne…” she nodded shyly. She then reached her chest with her hand. “Dugeun dugeun…”

“Omo! Eonni, are you having a love at first sight?!” I blurted out loud.

“Shh, not so loud! Umm, ne, Hyunnie. I guess I do.” She nodded shyly again.

Once again we shared excessive laughter. We laughed until we dropped a tear. It was the tears of joy of being reunited after so long. My long dream had finally become reality. I could see, hear, touch, and talk to Yoona eonni for real again. The joy and happiness that forever cannot be expressed by words.

I watched her silently and smiled joyfully as the café was filled by Yoong eonni’s alligator laugh.

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Author's note:

Annyeonghaseyo~

Jwesonghamnida for the reeeeeeaaaaaallllllyyyyyyyy late update >< been very very busy with college activities.

So here's an update in my short leisure time before getting back to the busy schedule of activities X( I can't imagine my idols having to face extremely tight schedules when it's already hard for me to be in this kind of situation which is nothing compared to theirs...

It's about Yoong and Seo's reunion hehe.... sorry for mistakes, haven't had time to proofread this (_ _ )7 very sorry about that

I hope you can still enjoy my story and patiently wait for the next updates because, I hate to say this but, it's gonna be another long wait x( but I really hope it won't be as long as this one.

Thank you for all your support and loyal readers who patiently wait for every updates! I do hope you can enjoy it till the very end!! xD

Manhi manhi gomapseumnida!!