Chapter 6!

How do you plan for a new life?

I wanted to move on and buying a new condo unit seemed appropriate. It was something that I intended to do for years but it was only now that I had the bravery to meet the unexpected.

When Hyoyeon returned, I knew that I had to do something. I love her still. Seeing her with her new boyfriend, I plan to make changes… but how much of me should I alter? How much of my life should be changed for her?

One by one, I started wrapping, stacking and piling my belongings. I plan to move by the end of the week. My sister felt that I should stay in her home longer but the idea of I, seeing Hyoyeon every morning, terrifies me. I tried putting up a face; making her feel that nothing changed but the truth is, I’m scared… there’s a terrified feeling inside my heart.

The feelings you have for a person will never easily die down, most particularly, if you were in love. Love has this tragic way of rekindling the past by bringing back old hurts. Despite seeing her with a new life, I knew that we had not talked about things yet. She may be too kind to smile or cordially acknowledge my presence but I knew that there were things that we had to discuss still. I was a part of her past; the one that hurts.

I was a nuisance in my own home and this old home had been the sanctuary of what-ifs and what-could-have-beens.

I went for this big box located in the uppermost part of my closet. I pulled it out and inside, I found my memories.

Our pictures together…

The first greeting card that she gave me on my birthday…

The cap that she bought for me…

And then a red velvet box came in full view. I sighed upon knowing what it was- an engagement ring.

I left the big box on the floor, brought with me the token and looked at it for a few more seconds. It was a pear-shaped diamond set in platinum.

When we were still together, she would stress that she never wanted anything too pricey but I wanted to give her the best. I smiled upon the thought. But afterwards, loneliness set in, for I never got the chance to even propose… that night, when I thought I mapped out the perfect plan for a proposal, fate betrayed me… or should I say—-I gave fate the chance to.

I felt my tears forming. I was for the nth time saddened. She belongs to someone else now. And while every sign points to me, losing, I cannot accept the idea.

I love her. I love Hyoyeon. I then put the ring back to its box. Something in me desires to keep it and I will.

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“Are you okay?”

“Of course, I’m excited to see your new unit, so are you sure you’re leaving Hyerim to Aunt Rina?”

“She needs to go back to the States. She wanted it there. She misses her friends. She wants to study there so I had no choice.”

“But how about your house in Gangnam, are you just going to leave it like that?”

“Aunt Rina will take care of everything. Besides, that house was too big for me. And If  ever Hyerim will leave then, I’ll be just left alone and the loneliness might kill me.”

“Aigoo my poor baby, but at least you’re free to take any girls home now, hahaha”

“You know me Hyo, I’m not like that. There’s only one girl that I want & wishes to take home… and if she like, she can also stay & live there with me…” He said while looking straight at me

I kept mum. Donghae… he has been very generous with his time. He would do everything for me and I knew that. He would be willing to change his life but I could not manage to say yes.

My plan was still my top priority. In fact, I haven’t started yet.

“One day, Hae… once I’m done with my plan, then that’s when I will decide.”

“Hyo… about that… are you sure you’re not going to change your mind? You still gonna do it?”

“You saw him. You knew my story. I’m still mad at him and you know that.”

“Hyo…”

“I will never forget that night, and the nerve of him to see me after all that happened.”

“Hyo… don’t you think it’s too much--”

“Too much? Which one? When you gave your everthing to that person just to make him happy? Or when you gave him all your trust but you just ended up being hurt… that is too much Donghae… that’s too much.”

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No Hyo! Don't be like that to Junho!!😭

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