The Comeback[s]
BastardIt isn’t for another long week and a half that Mei Lin shows any signs of recovering, and on that particular Saturday, it’s as if everyone had been invited because everyone is gathered in the hall outside of Mei Lin’s room—the doctor still not allowing her more than one visitor at a time. Henry had barely stepped outside the hospital, and Lu Han, as well as Yi Fan, would often come right after work. (Victor knows that he is of no further help and besides, the other four wouldn’t allow him to see her anyway.) Gale is too busy with her newborn on most days, so she’s normally at Henry’s house taking care of Alistair; but today, after putting him down for what she hopes to be a long nap, she decides to visit.
When she arrives, she can see the three men sitting in the hall. Why the hell is he here again? She doesn’t need any more blood. Ignoring one of them, she gives Henry and Yi Fan a questioning look, assuming that at least one of them would’ve been in there with Mei Lin. Don’t tell me Victor’s in there.
“The nurse kicked us out so that she can replace her IV fluids,” Henry explains.
Just as the last word left his mouth, the young woman in white comes out looking a bit frantic; not too long ago, Mei Lin’s pale lips parted and had asked, “Wu Yi… sir, are you alright?” in a hoarse but comprehendible whisper. Her tired eyes opened shortly after.
“She’s awake,” the nurse says timidly. “She’s asking for Mister Wu.”
Yi fan quickly gets up and is about to burst through the door when he remembers that he shouldn’t say or do anything too sudden. He also takes a bit of time to straighten himself out, knowing for the fact that he looks like . I shouldn’t worry her anymore than I should. He walks in slowly and Mei Lin tries to move her stiff neck but has to settle for only moving her eyes. “Mei?”
“Nǐ zěn me yàng?” ("How are you?") she asks in the same coarse tone, the last thing she remembers being Yi Fan donning a brightly bloodstained white dress shirt. Seeing how he’s in different attire, she could only assume that she had been unconscious for quite some time. “You’re walking… that’s good.”
Yi Fan clenches his jaw and swallows even though his mouth just went dry. All the moisture seems to have gone to his eyes. He blinks a bit more than he should and breathes deeply in hopes that it would calm his wringed heart. Mei Lin closes her eyes again, making Yi Fan open his mouth in fear that she’s slipping back into her coma, but nothing comes out.
Her eyes open slowly once again and reminds herself to redirect her eyes at him. “What day is it?” From Yi Fan’s lack of response (he couldn’t remember the day for some reason—all this seemed to be one long nightmare), and from the condition that her body’s in, Mei Lin’s guess is that she hasn’t been moved in at least a week. “That long, huh?” she tries to smile but it only cracks her lips, causing her to wince. “Was anyone else hurt?” Yi Fan somehow manages to shake his head. “That’s good…” She squints and examines him. How long has it been since you’ve slept? “Wǒ méi shì.” ("I'm fine.")
Something breaks in Yi Fan’s composure and he drops down with his head on his arms and his arms on the bed. The pain in his knees from the impact with the floor was practically welcomed for it was a gentle caress compared to what’s lacerating his chest. Mei Lin forces herself to turn her head to the right and crane it down a bit. She sees her boss sobbing silently near her arm and hears a muffled, “Idiot.”
Unsure if he was talking to himself or her, Mei Lin puts all the effort she can manage into lifting her right arm. She winces but ignores the stiffness in her joints and muscles. Once her hand is resting lightly on his head, she moves her thumb back and forth in attempt to comfort him. “Hey,” she says, waiting for him to look up. “I’m still alive, aren’t I?” She tries again to smile but it only comes off to Yi Fan as pain.
He can’t bring himself to look at her anymore so he quickly throws his eyes to the side of the room. “Wǒ zhēn duì bù qǐ.” ("I am so sorry.")
Mei Lin’s hand now has enough strength to his head, so as she does this, she says to him, “Méi guān xì.” ("It doesn't matter.")
At the sound of that response, Yi Fan wants to run away, unable to face her. Unmoving, he blinks and his tears stain the sheets rather than his sleeve. The sight is enough to make Mei Lin want to cry, but her eyes are producing no tears. Yi Fan finally brings himself to drape his arm around Mei Lin as gingerly as he could manage and hugs her for a few moments. I’m so relieved that you’re alive. “Please don’t ever scare me like that again,” he begs aloud.
Mei Lin slowly brings her left arm up and puts it on Yi Fan’s back, her hand resting on his shoulder blade. “It won’t happen again, sir.”
This forces a choked laugh out of Yi Fan’s throat. Idiot. He stands himself up and fixes the sheets and Mei Lin’s pillow. “The K-gang is behind bars,” Yi Fan says, clearing his throat. “For attempted murder, breaking parole, trespassing, vandalism, and possession of an illegal weapon.” His eyes are still anywhere but on her.
“Where’s Tao?” Mei Lin asks.
He has to consciously remind himself not to frown. “He’s… in witness protection,” Yi Fan lies. With all the medication and her current well-being, Mei Lin is not herself and believes him. “We won’t be seeing him for a while.”
“You shouldn’t be here,” Mei Lin says. “You have more important things to worry about.”
Nothing is more important than you right now.
There’s a soft knock and Yi Fan turns to see if it’s another nurse. Henry stands on the other side of the glass, slightly impatient, and chooses to walk in anyway. Mei Lin can’t see who just walked in but Henry soon replaces Yi Fan. “Patients should be allowed to see their proxy, Kevin,” he says, trying to sound casual and lighthearted. “How are you feeling, Mei?”
“Stiff,” Mei Lin answers honestly, thinking that Yi Fan was out of the room after hearing the door close again.
Henry walks to Mei Lin’s bedside and pulls up a chair to keep Mei Lin’s attention and Yi Fan out of view. “You were shot twice: once in your right leg and once in your back.”
Yi Fan flinches as the memory of it all flashes behind his eyes.
“There’s damage to your lungs, windpipe and vocal cords from the excessive bleeding—you lost a dangerous amount of blood. Your heart is weaker as a result, so don’t push yourself.” Henry is smiling but Yi Fan is devastated. “Thank Lu Han when you get the chance for all the transfusions.”
He puts his hand on Mei Lin’s, unsure of what else to say and unable to keep such a professional composure. “Mei…” His eyes watch his own hand to ensure that he’s gentle enough. Is this why you pushed me away? They start to water.
“I’m sorry,” Mei Lin says, “for having troubled you. I know you’re in the middle of your tour and—”
“Mei,” Henry grasps her hand a bit tighter. “Just stop. Just shut up and worry about yourself for two seconds.”
She chuckles, “You’re not going to cry on me too, are you?”
Yi Fan laughs to himself silently.
She unconsciously laces her hand with his and rubs it. They stay like that for a few moments and once Mei Lin thinks that he’s calmed down, she says softly—not wanting to believe what she’s about to say, “Hin Wah… How many analgesics do they have me on?”
“Just morphine,” Henry says, after looking at her chart. “Why?”
“I… I don’t think I can move my right leg.” Yi Fan’s heart tightens.
Henry’s eyes widen and he gently lifts the sheets. Sure enough, Mei Lin’s left toes are moving but her right leg is idle. Panic overwhelms Yi Fan and Henry, “Doctor!”
After an hour of getting Mei Lin to adjust to consciousness, Henry is allowed to see Mei Lin again, who is now sitting in her bed and looking a shade more alive. “Don’t look so scared,” her voice still sounds like sandpaper. “I was just very, very stiff.” She wiggles her right toes for emphasis. She waits until the door is closed before adding, “You didn’t tell me he was in here too. He didn’t need to hear all of that.”
He had a right to know; he loves you too. “I brought Gale with me.”
“What?!” Mei Lin coughs from the sudden strain that she hadn't intend to put on herself. Henry quickly rushes to her side to rub her back. “You found her? And she’s here?”
“I was in Miami for a concert. I’m guessing she walked past me on my way back to the hotel because Amber found a note in her bag with her name and a number. Amber almost threw it away,” he pauses to chuckle. “She’s sneaky, let me tell you. We made plans to meet up at a café and before we even could even finish what we had ordered, the hospital called and—”
“And her baby?” Mei Lin asks. “Is it a boy?”
“Yeah, how did you know?” Henry pulls up a chair and sits.
“I don’t know, I think I might have dreamt about it.” She shakes her head a little. “There was yelling, but I remember something about a boy.”
Henry fixes Mei Lin’s hair. “Well, Alistair is here as well. They’re staying at my place for the time being.”
“Anything else I should know about?” Mei Lin asks, grateful for the fact that Henry is filling in the month long gap in her consciousness.
“I’m sure Kevin already told you this but they caught the sons of es that did this to you. The gun that they used was stolen and the reason why they broke into your apartment was to get Tao’s fingerprints… seeing how you two were living together.”
The decreased volume of Henry’s voice makes Mei Lin’s lips flatten into a thin line. “They were trying to frame him?”
“Don’t worry, they didn’t succeed,” Henry says quickly. “Tao talked to them and recorded their whole conversation. On top of that, how could he have shot himself with his own gun?”
“Tao was shot?!” Mei Lin’s heart monitor quickens in beeping once again. Henry had said too much. “Is that why he’s in witness protection?”
“… Yeah. Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. Everything’s fine, okay? Just worry about getting better.” Henry rubs Mei Lin’s back again and says a few more comforting things, hoping that this would lessen the severity of what he had just said. “I think someone else wants to see you.”
Mei Lin’s eyes follow Henry’s to the door and Gale walks in as if on cue. “Hello, stranger,” Mei Lin says, unable to suppress her smile.
“You look like ,” Gale smirks.
“I’ll leave you ladies alone,” Henry chuckles.
“We wouldn’t want her having another heart attack now, would we?” Gale snickers.
“Heart attack?” Mei Lin asks while the door closes.
“You had a heart attack and you don’t remember?” Gale teases. “Well, you were still in a coma, so I guess I can let that slide.”
“I remember having a nightmare,” Mei Lin says. I heard voices… “Is Lu Han here?” The grimace told all. “Have you talked to him?”
“I came back to China for you, not for him.” Gale did her best not to sound harsh.
Seeing how stiff that made Gale, Mei Lin drops the subject and moves onto a different boy in her life. “Alistair,” she says. “It’s a lovely name.” Gale quickly smiles. “Did you give him a Chinese name?”
Her smile dies. “It’s not my place,” she says simply, turning her head to the wall.
Mei Lin can’t help but bring the conversation back to what—whom she’s really concerned about, “Gale—” she holds her tongue, “Can I ask you for two things?”
Gale could hardly deny her friend, but she fears what those requests might be. “Depends.”
“Stay,” Mei Lin says carefully. “Stay in China and go back to GIBI. I’m going to be out of commission for at least two more months and as capable as your replacement is, I do not trust him to run two Departments. Please? For my sake.”
“Mei, I have a newborn now and—”
“I’m willing to bet my good leg that Xue’s the one taking care of him right now,” Mei Lin says. “Send Victoria if you don’t want to deal with the Resource Department.” Gale is still trying her lip. “You’ll be getting my paycheck on top of your old one.”
“Mei, do you think that I could’ve pull off dropping off the face of the Earth if I didn’t have enough money? I don’t need nor do I want your money.”
“Raising a baby is expensive,” Mei Lin points out. “Take it.”
“Your medical bills—”
“Will be covered three times over.”
The two friends are having a staring contest now. This lasts for about thirty seconds before Gale huffs a reluctant, “Fine. I’ll come back and I’ll take your goddamn money.” She crosses her arms defensively, not wanting to believe that she had just caved and instead, asks, “What’s the other thing that you want from me?”
“Well, since you’re staying in the country now, that means that I’ll eventually get to meet your baby, doesn’t it? So it won’t be necessary for me to request this, I hope.” I would rather you work it out with Lu Han.
You’re holding back. “Spill,” she says seriously.
Mei Lin quickly comes up with something. “Wu Yi said that Tao is in witness protection. I doubt that I’ll ever get to see him again but it would be nice to know where he’s going to go and how he’s doing.”
Gale pays extra attention to her body language and facial composure. She’s still and silent for a few seconds too long but Mei Lin is too clouded by opiates to pick up on it. “What makes you think that I can find him?” she asks dryly.
“Well, seeing how you know how to disappear, I figured you would know how to see the invisible.” Mei Lin’s smile makes Gale flinch but that was the only break of her composure. “Or is it not the same?”
“It…really doesn’t work the other way around,” Gale says slowly, unable to look her in the eyes. The hell is wrong with me? Lying was never an issue before. She’s going to see right through me—
“Oh…”
How off her game has all this really thrown her? “I guess I should change and head to the office? Is my office still there or is that replacement using it?”
“You can use my desk.” Gale turns to leave but Mei Lin stops her, “Gale. C-can I ask you for one more favor.”
“Well, the last one was not doable, so yes,” Gale says, still facing the door.
Mei Lin is silent for quite some time, making Gale look back for a moment to see her eyes focused on the sheets. “I know you two don’t really get along but…”
Oh no, Mei, I swear if you mention Lu Han—
“Be nice to Wu Yi, would you?”
What? “I’ll try.” Those IVs must have you pretty out of whack. “I can’t promise anything.” Especially after the that I’ve been giving him; it’s going to look pretty weird if I’m suddenly forgiving.
“Thanks… for everything.”
“Just worry about getting better.”
Gale sighs and closes the door slowly. Weight takes over her body and she now has to lean against the wall but gravity pulls her down until she’s sitting on the cold linoleum. With her elbows resting on her propped knees, she puts her palms on her forehead and drags them back, raking her hair and feeling exhausted.
Yi Fan had already left and Henry went home as well, both of them just as drained as Gale from seeing Mei Lin in such a state—and from having to lie to her. It would crush her. She will find some way to blame herself; I know she will.
The last thing that she needs right now is the person that just arrived. Lu Han stumbles when he sees Gale in a curled mess. “Is she okay?” Lu Han asks, referring to Mei Lin.
“Yeah,” Gale says, too tired to be defensive. “She actually woke up a few hours ago.”
“Then what’s wrong?” Lu Han asks, genuinely sounding concern for both Mei Lin and Gale.
“Have you ever had to keep something from someone you love?” Gale asks. How the hell did she manage to lie to Henry and push him away? How did she not crumble? “The answer better be no,” Gale adds, realizing what her question would imply. A small smile slips through them both. “Tao.” The smiles drop. “You should go in and see her if she’s not sleeping. I think she wants to thank you for your blood.”
Lu Han peeks in and sees that Mei Lin is lying down but her eyes are blinking. He’s about to go in but the elevator down the hall opens and the sound of a crying baby pours into their ears. Scared, Lu Han looks up and sees a young lady holding golden-tanned baby. The doe-like eyes, small nose, and how he stops crying the moment he lays eyes on Lu Han, all of that tells Lu Han without words who he is. Xue slows her pace, confused as to why Alistair suddenly stops crying.
Gale is petrified for a moment but quickly scrambles to her feet to receive her child. “What’s wrong?”
“Mister Liu was trying to sleep and he won’t stop crying. I didn’t know what to do,” Xue says, sounding as if she is going to cry. “I tried taking him for a walk, but—”
Gale takes Alistair in her arms and he curls into her chest, but only for a moment. Alistair cranes his small neck and looks at the man in front of him. With a touch of innocence, Alistair reaches out to Lu Han, as if knowing that that’s his father, and tries to grasp him for depth perception has yet to develop. Gale looks away, the scene too much for her after the performance she had to put on for Mei Lin.
Can I hold him? Lu Han balls his fists, digging his dull nails into his palms and using the pain to control himself. Hi…
Alistair starts to cry again, wanting to he held by the man before him. Mei Lin’s ears perk up to the sound of Alistair’s wailing and cranes her neck to see through the glass panes in the doors. You got your voice from your father.
“Just ing take him,” Gale finally spits. Alistair stops crying immediately and starts to giggle and laugh. “Mei wanted to see him. Kill two birds with one stone; I’m leaving.” Xue tries to stop Gale, but is instead given instructions to bring Alistair (and only Alistair) back to Henry’s mansion.
Mei Lin hears her doors open again and sees Lu Han holding a smaller version of himself. “He looks just like you,” Mei Lin smiles, sitting up again. Xue moves forward and makes an attempt to help her. “Did she just leave?” Lu Han nods, his eyes not leaving Alistair’s. “Part of her is probably struggling to forgive you, then.”
“You think so?” Lu Han asks softly and hopefully.
They speak in hushed tones with Alistair starting to yawn and look sleepy from all the excitement. Mei Lin hums in responses while Xue moves a chair closer to Mei Lin’s beside for Lu Han to sit in. “Thank you,” she says. “I heard you donated a lot of blood—almost as much as I had lost.”
“Not that much,” Lu Han chuckles. “How are you feeling?”
“Tired,” Mei Lin admits. “And sore, even though this is the most movement that my body has seen in a month.” Lu Han smiles again but it’s hard to say if it was because of Mei Lin’s lame attempt at a joke or because of the darling that’s in his arms. “Have you decided on a Chinese name?”
“Lù Àn Lín.”
“'The deer of the dark forest,'” Mei Lin mumbles to herself in English. “Why?” she asks, switching back to Mandarin.
“Something about his eyes,” Lu Han smiles. “Or maybe I’m biased.”
“Have you gotten a chance to talk to her?” Mei Lin asks.
“I’ve been scolded and yelled at, does that count?” Lu Han sighs. “I asked a few stupid questions and kept my mouth shut ever since.” Being able to hold him right now is a miracle all on its own.
“Give her time,” Mei Lin says softly. “She gave you time.” Mei Lin realized that she shouldn’t have said that all too late. “Tell you what, why don’t you go to my apartment and office to get me some of my things?”
“Liu, my boss, and not to mention, Gale, would kill me if I brought you any electronics,” Lu Han says. “The doctor gave us all very specific orders not to strain you given your current condition.”
“My rent, my bills—”
“Let Liu and Victoria handle the housekeeping,” Lu Han says.
“He can’t stay here; he’s in the middle of a tour—his first tour at that.”
Lu Han knows better than to tell Mei Lin that Henry had canceled the rest of his tour. “You haven’t changed at all,” Lu Han says. “Don’t worry about us when you were the one who almost went to the other side.”
“I have very good balance,” Mei Lin says. “I know how to walk the line.” Mei Lin feels a want to hold the baby in Lu Han’s arms but she highly doubts that Lu Han would hand him over, plus, the IVs in her arms beg to differ with her. “Bring Victoria here tomorrow.” Lu Han is hesitant to agree. “It won’t be about business,” Mei Lin says. “But it would put me at greater ease if I know everything’s being taken care of.”
“The prince is actually doing very well without his maid,” Lu Han says. “You don’t have to worry about him.”
“I’m well aware that he’s very capable; that’s not what I’m worried about,” Mei Lin admits. “Be honest with me for a second, will you?” Lu Han holds his breath in fear of what she might ask. “He’s blaming himself for all of this, isn’t he?”
There’s a long silence before Lu Han nods. Both he and Tao blamed themselves. “That’s why you have to focus on getting better.”
Mei Lin nods and gives Xue a look, cuing her to speak. “We should go. It’s getting late and Miss Chen needs her rest.”
Lu Han gets up but still refuses to let go of his son. “Goodnight, Mei.”
Mei Lin simply smiles. Lu Han leaves first and Mei Lin stops Xue. “Could you get me that water?” As Xue pours Mei Lin a cup, she starts coughing uncontrollably. This startles Xue and causes her to drop the cup. She rushes over to try to comfort Mei Lin and calls for the nurses when Mei Lin starts coughing up blood. “I’m fine,” Mei Lin insists in between all the hacking.
“You shouldn’t talk so much,” the doctor says.
“Don’t say anything to Hin Wah,” Mei Lin says to Xue. “Go, Gale’s going to be mad if she finds out that Lu Han has run off with their son.”
Luckily, Lu Han had fallen asleep with Alistair still in his arms (and still on the same floor). And sadly, after he awakens, his arms are empty.
Though it is a relief that Mei Lin is now awake and slowly making progress towards recovery, no one is able to sleep very well that night. Gale and Henry blame it on Alistair and the time zone adjustment but Yi Fan knows all too well what’s—who’s keeping him up at night. It’s been taken care of. They’re behind bars, for life; it’s over. But what if… what if Lau’s right and keeping her so close is nothing but a target for my enemies to aim at? I’m going to have more and different kinds when I take over the company and—but I don’t want her to be any more distant than she is—I need her.
It goes without saying that Yi Fan comes to work appearing more dead than he has been for the past month. Some life gets startled back into him when he sees Gale in her lab coat in Mei Lin’s office. “I know I’m dressed in white, but I can assure you that I’m not a ghost, Yi Fan.” She glances at Yi Fan and then returns to her work. “You look like .” The stunned silence provides Gale with opportunity to jab a bit more. “What? You’re not going to threaten to fire me for speaking like this to my boss?”
“What are you doing here?” Yi Fan finally asks.
“My job,” Gale says. “And her job—well, one of her jobs. Do you mind?” Mei Lin’s voice is ringing in Gale’s head every time she says something cold. “Talk to Victoria or Yi Xing if you need something; I’m not your puppet.”
“Mei is not my puppet,” Yi Fan says. He stands there for a moment, playing with the question in his head before saying something else that might have him sent through the glass. “Gale, can I ask you something?”
“Sure, I just might not answer.”
“What should I do about Mei?”
“I’m not exactly the most ideal person to be giving advice on anything related to whatever it is that you feel for her.”
“No, not about that. When she recovers, I think I should fire her,” Yi Fan says slowly.
Gale holds back the need to slap Yi Fan. “Just shoot her yourself, why don’t you? Do you know how much she’s dedicated to this company? To you? And you’re just going to fire her the moment that she gets better?”
“Not from being Department Head,” Yi Fan clarifies. “From the secretary position.”
“You know that she’ll still act as your secretary even if you fire her, right? That’s just who she is. She cares too much to let you have to do all this alone.”
“But I won’t be alone… technically.”
“You want to try saying that again? With a straight face this time?” Silence. “Yeah, I thought so.” Gale sighs, “Just… act like nothing’s changed. It’s what she would do. Let’s just try to keep everything as normal as possible.”
There’s commotion in the lobby and the two turns to see that it’s a couple demanding to see Yi Fan. “Where is he?!” they demand, loud enough to be heard through the glass. “I demand to know what the son of a has done with my son!”
The only other time that Gale has seen Yi Fan look so petrified and guilty was the moment that Gale’s presence was made known to Yi Fan. Yi Fan starts shaking with fear as the couple spots Yi Fan through the clear glass. Even Gale starts to feel scared when they enter.
“It’s true, isn’t it?!” the woman demands.
“Wǒ… wǒ zhēn duì bù qǐ.” ("I...I am so sorry.")
Gale doesn’t need to know that the dialect is from the city of Qingdao to know who these people are. And Gale doesn’t need to be able to understand it to feel the mix of anger and misery that they’re going through. And she doesn’t need to imagine what Yi Fan must be going through right now, because she can’t.
Author's Notes/Translations:
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Nǐ zěn me yàng? (你怎麼樣?) = How are you?/Are you okay?/How are you doing? Inquiring about one's current state of well-being, essentually. Note the normal/casual/not-formal use of the word you.
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Wǒ méi shì. (我沒事.) = I'm fine. lit. I [have] no matters.
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Méi guān xì. (沒關係.) = a phrase that roughly translates to "it doesn't matter," meaning: don't worry about it. It's used to downplay the sevarity of a situation.
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Lù Àn Lín (鹿暗林)
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