Chasing Cars
Bastard“What a pleasant surprise,” Ms. Kwon says at the sight of Mei Lin, who bows on sight. “Surely there’s no need for that anymore, not when Yi Fan doesn’t even bother with formalities.”
Yi Fan bows his head in the slightest way possible before pretending to look busy. “I’ll see you tonight at—”
“Yeah,” Mei Lin says quickly so that her boss can be free from this awkward situation. “Try not to look too miserable." You are the head of the PR Department, after all.
Yi Fan nods and walks off in some arbitrary direction. “Are you still his secretary?” Ms. Kwon asks. "Surely with a position of your own you—"
“Yes,” Mei Lin says. A photographer who is documenting the conference interrupts the young ladies. They both plaster a well-practiced smile before returning to their conversation. “Ms. Kwon, I was wondering, uh…”
“Yes?” Ms. Kwon asks, even though she already has a pretty good idea as to where this is going.
“Earlier this year, you and Yi Fan—”
“Ah yes,” Ms. Kwon says, smiling at the recollection. “He tried so hard.”
The chuckle in Ms. Kwon’s voice peaks Mei Lin’s curiosity. “What do you mean?”
“The poor boy was so stiff but he did everything a gentleman was expected to do. He held the door open for me, pulled my chair out, asked me if I’m doing well, about my hobbies—he even tried to compliment me on how I looked that night,” Ms. Kwon giggles. “It was sweet; he wanted to please me, but his heart wasn’t in it. He’s a good man, I’m sure—nothing like what the rumors make him out to be—but I won’t settle for someone who does such nice things out of necessity and I feel like he’s the same way.” Ms. Kwon pauses as the events roll through her mind’s eye. “He seemed disappointed with himself at the end of the night when I told him of my observations.” She looks at Mei Lin for an explanation but unfortunately, Mei Lin doesn’t have an answer. She decides to change the subject, “Your latest project has our stocks at its highest for the past decade.”
Mei Lin bows a bit and says, “I hadn’t noticed.”
“Then you should talk to your Finance Department,” Ms. Kwon says.
“I think I will,” Mei Lin says, giving them both a reason to end this conversation. They bow with hopes of seeing each other again and Mei Lin goes off back to her booth where Gale is holding down the fort, so to speak. “Well?”
“I feel like Hercules after being swallowed by the hydra,” Gale chuckles.
“You know the Disney rendition is inaccurate, right?” Mei Lin asks with the same chuckle.
“You get the point,” Gale says, rolling her eyes. “So, how do you feel, Hua Mulan?”
“I can’t tell if you just called me a man or if you’re implying that I’m going marry Henry.”
“You saved this company—or rather, the future of this company.”
“That’s hardly anything compared to the empire of China,” Mei Lin says, rolling her eyes. “You’re giving me far too much credit. If you weren’t here, none of this would even be three-dimensional, or even tangible. If I’m Mulan, then you’re Mushu.”
“Oh Mei, I’m blushing,” Gale says sarcastically with a well-placed hand over her heart. “Let’s hope I don’t ruin your engagement.”
“What engagement?” Mei Lin chuckles.
“Come on, it’s not like you’ve never talked about it before,” Gale says. “Surely he’s brought it up before.”
“Once,” Mei Lin says. “It’s only been a year, Gale. Since when were you one to rush things?”
Gale lets out a laugh, “Never. And I know you’re not one to either.” God knows how many years it took for you and Junsu to finally kiss. “But you’ve known each other for so long, surely you would make an exception. I mean, come on Mei, I thought you Chinese people are quick to get married, especially since you’re already well into your mid-twenties.”
“What’s wrong with playing it safe?” Mei Lin asks with Victor’s memory firmly in mind.
“Nothing,” Gale says. “But if you love him and the feeling is mutual, I don’t see why you would wait. I know you want a family, Mei—”
“And that’s exactly why I should take my time,” Mei Lin says back.
“I don’t pay you to gossip,” Yi Fan says with a bit of a smirk.
You don’t pay me, Mei Lin corrects him mentally.
“She’s here for her Department,” Gale says in Mei Lin’s defense. “Surely you can go three days without a PA. Gosh, how do you live through the weekend?”
“You’re lucky I can’t fire you,” Yi Fan says, squinting his eyes. “You on the other hand—”
“I thought you said I was going to see you tonight,” Mei Lin says back playfully. “If you needed something, sir, you always have my number.”
“Maybe he just misses you,” Gale suggests, testing the boundaries with a daring smirk. “Tired of pretending like you don't care?”
Yi Fan’s glare could cut diamonds but it doesn’t even faze Gale in the slightest. I might not care but I’m trying. “Tired of doing your job?” Yi Fan snaps back.
“If I was, at least my boss would give me a break,” Gale says back. If only concealer didn’t exist, then you would know what you’re really doing to her.
Gale almost believes that she sees a frown trying to tug on Yi Fan’s lips but he simply looks away as she receives a sharp glare from Mei Lin. You shouldn’t have said that.
Don’t look at me like that; I don’t see why you’re trying to protect him from the harsh truth, Gale glares back.
“Ms. Chen?” The three look over at a poorly dressed man. He glances at the nametags before him and directs his attention to the young lady in the center. “Hello.” He extends his hand and Mei Lin shakes it lightly. “My daughter has an incurable case of ALS and I was hoping that you would be able to help us.”
Yi Fan’s eyes go wide and Gale looks away, but the three of them had the same idea: How the hell does he know about that?
“I am so sorry to hear that,” Mei Lin says, her Mandarin sounding fake with sincerity. “But I don’t see how I could—”
“Please,” the man begs. “I know about how you cured that one lady and—”
“I am sorry, I do not know what you are talking about,” Mei Lin says evenly. Who the hell broke confidentiality—
“But Chairman Wu said—”
“What did he say?” Yi Fan asks. He did not…
“He was talking about it earlier at their panel,” the man says, shrinking under Yi Fan’s controlled fury. “He said he had an engineer who successfully cured a case of terminal ALS…”
“And what makes you think it was me?” Mei Lin demands, sounding as angry as Yi Fan looks.
“There she is!”
Her attention is being pulled in every which direction now with the throng of reporters, cameras, microphones and interested clients. Mei Lin is overwhelmed by the massive entourage of questions and can’t help but blink repeatedly at the constant and repetitive flashes from expensive bulbs. Mei Lin says nothing, mostly because she is unsure what to say and in which direction she should say it. Gale takes two steps back and Yi Fan’s rage is about to boil over as the original man tries to get Mei Lin’s attention again. He grabs Mei Lin by the arm and pulls her away and down the isle of booths and stands in spite of the following crowd of media. They call out her name, and even Yi Fan’s, but his steps are purposeful and non-stopping. They follow the two out of the building and they stand there for a spilt moment before Zi Tao pulls up and takes them away.
“You still in one piece?” Yi Fan asks. Mei Lin simply nods though she’s not sure if she believes her actions.
This isn’t the first time Mei Lin was in front of cameras or reporters (her boss is Head of Public Relations, after all), but this had been the first time that Mei Lin was approached in such a way. She’s used to prepared press conferences and formal meetings. This is the first time that Yi Fan had to be the one to hold off the media rather than the other way around. He’s use to the bright lights, the rude and blunt questions, and the lack of personal space but Mei Lin has always been in the background providing support or anything else that Yi Fan needed.
“Where are we going?” Mei Lin asks once she realizes her surroundings.
Zi Tao gives Yi Fan a look with the same question. “Tavola,” Yi Fan says, activating the car’s GPS. I need some quiet to mull over the that he just caused.
“But sir,” Mei Lin says, “You don’t have a reservation.”
“Duì zhǎng doesn’t need a reservation,” Zi Tao smirks. “Not when he knows the owner personally.”
“Would you like to join us?” Mei Lin offers once they arrive, ignoring the look that her boss gives her.
Zi Tao chuckles at Yi Fan’s displeased expression that threatens to fire him if he accepts, so instead he simply says, “Rain check.”
Yi Fan gets out of the car himself and waits for Mei Lin before entering the building. Some words are exchanged between the usher and Yi Fan before someone, who Mei Lin presumes is the owner, leads the both of them to a private back room. “You sure you’re okay?” Yi Fan asks after ordering for them both.
“Shouldn't I be asking you that, sir?” Mei Lin asks. You have to be pissed off.
“I’m clearly not okay, Mei,” Yi Fan says matter-of-factly. “But I’m not the one who’s going to be the face of this new revelation.”
“This was all experimental. The fact that it worked is a miracle on its own,” Mei Lin exclaims. “If we were to start taking clients for such cases, does he even realize how much time and effort—”
“And money,” Yi Fan points out.
Mei Lin waves her hand, giving the point to Yi Fan. “I wouldn’t have time to do anything else, and,” Mei Lin sighs. “I’m not even a doctor. Am I even licensed to do this? Probably not.” Mei Lin rubs her head. “Do you know how much paperwork I had to draft and get signed and checked by lawyers and doctors and all parties before I was even allowed to begin administration and treatment? Just the amount of testing that had to be done to identify the issue and what I was trying to fix—”
“Mei,” Yi Fan says, before Mei Lin pops a screw loose. “Thank you,” he says sincerely, as he now realizes just how much Mei Lin had to do to save his mother from ALS.
Mei Lin calms at the sounds of those words, relaxing her tense shoulders and sinking a bit in her chair. “There’s no need for that, sir,” Mei Lin says. “I did not mean for it to sound as if—”
“I know,” Yi Fan says with a bit of a grin.
“My point was that should that have to be done for more people,” Mei Lin sighs at the thought, “It would require a whole new department and perhaps even a whole other branch of the company. I’m a biomedical engineer, sir, and even though this is in my job description, it is not in my contract and as much as I would love to help everyone—”
“I know,” Yi Fan nods, feeling himself calm while he’s trying to do just that for Mei Lin.
“Does that make me a bad person?” Mei Lin asks aloud. “I have an opportunity to help hopeless cases, but I’m not God and I don’t want to make promises I can’t keep. To be quite honest, it was a long shot and—”
“Mei,” Yi Fan says sternly, forcing Mei Lin’s attention, “You’re a wonderful person.”
Mei Lin shifts awkwardly in her seat as the food comes in and she is unsure as to where to place her eyes as she feels an even more awkward heat rise up her neck, threatening to color her cheeks. She’s gravely uncomfortable by such words and from such a person and even worse, she is unsure as to how to feel about it.
“What really gets under my skin,” Yi Fan says, jerking Mei Lin back into this world. “Is that he would use his own wife to make money.” He might not have revealed her name or who she was, but just the very principle—
“Sir?”
Yi Fan looks at Mei Lin, who looks very concerned. He looks down at his hand, which is now bleeding because he had clutched the knife too tightly. “Oh.” He doesn’t even feel the pain. Mei Lin quickly pulls out what appears to be a first-aid kit from her bag and starts to clean and bandage the shallow cut. “I wonder where the nearest basketball court is,” he says jokingly, but that doesn’t seem to make Mei Lin worry any less. “I’ll get over this, don’t worry.” He doesn’t sound as reassuring as he’s trying to be though.
“You might as well tell me not to do my job,” Mei Lin mumbles. How can I not worry about you?
Yi Fan frowns deeply, ensuring that Mei Lin can see his expression when she finishes up. “Mei,” he almost whines. I just want you to trust me. “I’m asking you to have a bit of faith.”
Mei Lin pauses when putting her first-aid kit away to let those words sink in. She glances at his right hand before trying to keep her eyes on his to look for any signs of wavering. When did they go from cold diamonds to warm coffee? Mei Lin closes her eyes and reminds herself that she hates coffee. Sometimes coffee is necessary, a voice reminds her. “Sir,” she finally says. “You can ask me for a lot of things, but one thing that I never expected from you is advice on my religious beliefs.” Yi Fan bites his lip a bit, knowing that Mei Lin is purposefully interpreting his request out of context to lighten the mood. “As idealistic as I am, we live in reality. I’ll do so when I sleep.” At least I can still dream that my way of life actually has even a smidge of influence.
Yi Fan sighs and the two eat in silence. “I guess this is his punishment,” Yi Fan mumbles to himself. “Piece of .”
Mei Lin is about to comment as to how Yi Fan should not speak that way about his own father but she realizes that would be hypocritical seeing how she doesn’t have the highest views on her father either. “It’s doable,” Mei Lin says, trying to make Yi Fan feel less guilty.
“You just don’t want to,” Yi Fan adds.
“My wants and my preferences are different,” Mei Lin points out. “I would prefer not to.”
“Why not?” Yi Fan asks out of curiosity. “You would be provided with the proper resources and—”
“How the hell am I going to juggle four different jobs?” Mei Lin asks.
“Four?”
“I’m your secretary slash PA, I’m the Head of the Developmental Department, I’m still a bio-medical engineer in terms of design and creation, and I’m not sure what else I would be should this become a thing, but I have a feeling that I’m going to be the Head of another Department, and I would likely lead another team or—”
“You don’t have to be my secretary any more if—” Yi Fan is cut off my Mei Lin’s sudden but sharp stare. “What?”
“How many times have I told you that I wasn’t going to quit?” Mei Lin asks. “Like I said, it’s only a preference. They can’t put me in another position without my consent anyway—”
“Unless the board goes behind your back,” Yi Fan points out.
“They can’t,” Mei Lin smiles.
“Oh?”
“Because you’re a board member and you would never allow that to happen.” See, I do have faith, just not towards what you want me to.
“If they make you the Head of two Departments, then you’ll be a board member as well,” Yi Fan points out. I only got to keep my seat because I’m to inherit the company.
“They won’t do this to me,” Mei Lin says. “I would have way too much power for someone who has only been here for fourteen months, not to mention the stocks.”
“We could take over the company if you did,” Yi Fan says playfully. “Lau would be on our side. He may not be a board member but he owns quite the number of stocks.”
“Lu Han would back me, I’m sure,” Mei Lin smiles. “And of course Gale would.”
“I sometimes forget that that little deer has a pretty decent chunk of the company as well,” Yi Fan says, “You wouldn’t think so, but he does.”
Mei Lin giggles at Yi Fan’s use of the pun that is Lu Han’s name. “Henry, you, me, Lu Han, and our respective departments,” Mei Lin says slowly as she does the math in her head. “That’s pretty close to fifty-one percent.”
“Suho seems to like you enough,” Yi Fan points out. “And he’s friends with Lu Han.”
“That would push it way over fifty one percent,” Mei Lin laughs. “Do you know how many shares Suho owns?”
“There’s a reason why he’s the Head of the Finance Department, Mei,” Yi Fan says with a big grin. “Then it’s settled,” he declares. “We’re going to stage a coup.” Mei Lin throws her head back and laughs freely.
Yi Fan chuckles along. Is this what it looks like to be happy?
His thoughts and her laughter are interrupted by the sound of her phone. “Text from Henry,” Mei Lin says before Yi Fan could ask or look over her shoulder. “He’s wondering if I’m alright.”
“What are you telling him?” he asks as Mei Lin types a response.
“That I’m with you,” Mei Lin says. There is almost an immediate reply and Mei Lin chuckles at Henry’s text. “He says that that doesn’t really tell him if I’m alright or not,” Mei Lin explains.
“Are you?” Yi Fan asks somewhat seriously, causing Mei Lin’s chuckling to die down awkwardly.
“I will be,” Mei Lin says after a sigh.
“Future tense,” Yi Fan points out with lips pressed thin. Mei Lin simply nods while keeping her eyes on her phone even though the screen is dark right now. “Anything I can do now?”
Mei Lin is quiet as she thinks about this thoroughly. “I don’t want to go back to the convention,” Mei Lin admits. “And I have a feeling that they’re waiting for us back at the hotel.”
“Then we’ll go to another one,” Yi Fan says.
“…What?”
“Let’s go,” YI Fan says, sitting up. He leaves three one hundred Yuan bills on the table and motions for Mei Lin to follow him as he calls for a cab. “I’m sure they’re tailing Tao by now.”
One pulls up less than twenty seconds later and he opens the door for Mei Lin. She gets in and Yi Fan asks for the closest five star hotel. Mei Lin ignores the fancy gold characters and metallic trim on the fine glass doors because it only reminds her how much this is out of her price range. However, it no longer surprises Mei Lin when Yi Fan books the rooms and pays for them both. They’re separate rooms that can join together and Mei Lin almost protests because a double room is cheaper than two singles but the thought of spending the night in the same room as her boss—or worse: sharing a bed with her boss—is shudder-worthy, so she holds her tongue.
Mei Lin is about to take a shower when she realizes that she has no clothes to change into. “There are robes in the closet and they do dry-cleaning downstairs,” Yi Fan points out when he realizes that he has the same dilemma. He almost smirks at the color that is peeking through Mei Lin’s cheeks when she realizes what that means. “Never slept before, Mei?” He can’t help but chuckle at how his secretary can be.
“It’s not that I’ve never—” Mei Lin looks around awkwardly as she rocks on her feet. “Just never alone,” she mumbles.
Yi Fan feels the need to cough because something is choking him suddenly. He rubs the back of his neck for a moment before looking away as well. “You could call him, I’m sure,” he says to himself. I hope these walls are thick enough.
He sees Mei Lin shake her head from the corner of his eye. “They’ll follow him. And besides, if anyone is going to come here, it would be Lu Han with my clothes.” If anything, I’ll just sleep with the robe on. “I’ll be fine.”
“Don’t be shy into calling room service,” Yi Fan says. He’s about to close the joining door when Mei Lin stops it with her hand. “Hm?”
“Sir,” Mei Lin says, not meeting his eyes. “I know you’re not one to have debts and I understand that you’re only trying to pay me back for your furnishings…”
That’s not the whole story…
“…But I’ve done the math.”
Of course you have.
“And you were out of the red over a month ago…” Mei Lin blinks religiously as the awkward air thickens. She starts to fidget under her boss’ observing eyes. “Not that I’m complaining, sir, but uh, I don’t particularly like being in debt to anyone either, and—”
“You don’t owe me anything,” Yi Fan says matter-of-factly. He closes the joining door and waits until he can hear Mei Lin sigh and plop down back on her bed. These walls are not thick enough… Not if Yi Fan can hear Mei Lin humming to herself. You would think such a pricey place would invest in some better—
Yi Fan’s train of thought is cut of by the sound of Mei Lin’s muffled voice through the walls. “If I lay here/ if I just lay here/ would you lie with me and just forget the world?” He’s tempted to get up off the bed to crack the joining door open just enough to hear her better. “Forget what we’re told/ before we get too old/ Show me a garden that’s bursting into life.”
Someday, I will. Even though the wall filters what Yi Fan can hear and the clarity of the lyrics, it’s still soothing to him.
“All that I am/ All that I ever was/ is here in your perfect eyes, they’re all I can see.”
I’m sure she’s thinking about Lau…
“I don’t know where/ Confused about how as well/ Just know that these things will never change for us at all.”
That sounds like it could apply to me—I wish it were me she was singing about—what a lovely voice.
“If I lay here/ if I just lay here/ would you lie with me and just forget the world?”
Yes.
Translations/Author's Notes:
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"I hadn't noticed" = once again, it is polite to deny compliments at least a few times to not come off as arrogant.
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"I feel like Hercules...." = Hercules was particulary worn out and tired after his fight with Hades' first monster.
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"Let's hope I don't ruin your engagement" = this is reference to Mulan 2 {whispers which wasn't as great as the first one but ok Li}
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The song that Mei Lin sings at the end of the chapter is Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol.
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