My wrists were fastened to either side of the bed using handcuffs. I did not know why they put me here, all I knew was that I had done something wrong. It could be because I did not eat up all my food, or because I told them to go away, or even because of both. Whenever I did something inappropriate they would lock me up somewhere, depending on how bad my actions were. They did it to everyone here.

 Only a few days back, I was locked inside one of the isolated rooms in the building. Those rooms were directly horrible. The walls were not painted, they were grey and dirty. There were no objects inside the room, not even a window. Everything inside of there was an iron door. I was locked inside one of those rooms because I had a panic attack. I was isolated because I was crazy.

 They said they only did it to make us better, to help us, but it was all a big fat lie. People died inside of this building. They either killed themselves, died of exhaustion or simply were killed. How was that good for me? How was I supposed to become better if my surroundings were totally messed up?

 I missed the life outside of this prison. I even missed the horrible times at the hospital. I missed having the possibility to go outside for some fresh air or just to sit down and read a book. I missed Sungjae’s visits. But what I missed the most was Minhyuk. I felt betrayed, but I still loved him so much. I wanted to feel his gentle kisses and have his arms around me. The last time I felt safe with him was more than two months ago now.

 Looking at the brighter side, I had actually managed a friend. Her name was Yook Sungmi. She had been at this place since she was five. She was bent and broken. Her life had been taken so roughly away from her. She told me she was kidnapped and taken to this place. No one had looked for her since.

 But I was not even sure if she was real. I saw dead-like people reaching out to me all the time. They were everywhere. I saw people hurting each other around in the halls, and no one else seemed to notice it. I heard people scream in pain and horror, even inside of the isolated rooms. It all just felt like one horrible nightmare. Nothing felt real anymore. I was so tired, I just wanted it all to end soon…

 The door in front of me opened, and I squinted my eyes at the sudden light. A woman entered the room, Doctor Shin. She talked with all the patients in this place to see if they were changing for the better or the worse. She was said to help, but she only made it all worse.

 “Hey Sujung, how are you doing?” she asked, smiling as she sat down beside of me on a chair.
 “I would have been better if you took these handcuffs off of me…” I said, looking up in the ceiling. “Why am I here?”
 “Because it will teach you how to behave better, and when you behave better, better things will happen to you,” she told me.

 “No! I don’t want to be here!” I cried. “Can’t I at least go outside for some air?”
 “I’m sorry, but you cannot. We need to take some tests today,” Doctor Shin said. I looked at her, eyes teary.
 “What kind of tests…?” I asked carefully, my voice coming out as only a whisper. I could clearly remember last time we were taking ’tests’.

 “We are just going to see how you react under water,” she explained. I started struggling against the handcuffs, loud noises of iron hitting iron filling the room. I did not want to go under water. I was terrified!

 “Relax! It will not take long,” she said. Some of the guards came in the door and started to remove the handcuffs. I tried to run away, but they had a strong grip on me as they started to drag me out of the room and through the corridor. The whole way, I did anything in my power to get away, but as always, I failed. They were too strong and I had no strength in my body after all this time.

 We entered a room, and before I could do anything at all, they were tying my wrists and ankles together tightly. I was then lowered down in what seemed to be a small, yet deep, hole in the ground. I could feel the hard walls scratch by me as I turned violently to be let free. After a little while, they stopped lowering me down, and I was left in the middle of the dark hole. I looked up at the opening above my head, silently pleading to be let out.

 The only thing I could feel was cold. No ground was to be felt underneath my feet, and it was too little space to try and move and crawl upwards. My heart was racing as I heard the sound of water, and the next thing I knew, they were pouring ice cold water over my head. All my muscles tightened at the sudden cold and I could hear it crash against the ground.

 I could not be too long above it, because it was filling up rather quickly around me as they kept throwing freezing water over my head. I was almost unable to breath. Panic approached me. It felt like the walls were starting to come closer. I screamed and begged them to stop, but only more water came. Soon, water filled all the way up to my neck.

 Harder than ever, I tried to do something to escape. Yet again, everything was hopeless. Water was over my head by then. I could not breathe. I could not see. It came to the point when I thought I would pass out after minutes under the cold water.

 I prayed to every god there is to spare my life, to make this stop, and just as if my wish had been heard, the water started to slide away. I had no idea how, but it did not take long before it was by my neck again, allowing me to take a deep and sharp breath. I heard the sound of water running down a hatch.

 I was so happy I even cried. Just a moment ago, I feared my life being taken away, but then, as if a miracle had happened, my wish was heard for the first time and I was saved! Or so I thought…

 The next moment, burning hot water started pouring down from the opening. I screamed in pain, feeling the hot water burn my ice cold skin. I threw myself against the walls, who seemed to have come so close since I was put here at first, in attempt of getting away.

 Why was I punished like this? What had I ever done wrong? It could not possibly be only because I was born, the idea of it was only stupid. A human would not come to the world without a purpose. Again, I went through the same experience; only in heated water this time. I was 100% sure there were left burn marks on my skin.

 After another eternity, the water faded away. I prepared my body for whatever was to come next, and to my surprise, I was being dragged out from the small hole, taken back on the safe ground. Maybe safe was the wrong word to use as I was not safe anywhere inside of this building, but it was safer up here than down there.

 “Why are you doing this to me?!” I managed to breathlessly choke out as I coughed up water from my lungs, sobbing.
 “You know very well that all of this is to prepare you for the world outside,” one of the men said. I glanced up at him, tears blocking my view.
 “What you prepare me for is not what I’ve experienced outside before,” I told him, still trying to catch my breath.

 I received a kick to my rib cage. Knowing that anything I did or said would annoy them, I kept silent, only focusing on breathing and calming down for now.

-

 “Eonni, did you live with your family before you came here?” Sungmi suddenly asked as we sat inside the library. It was not much, and it was not large, but it was something. Even if all the books were old and broken, and it was too dark to even read, it was still just a quiet place no one else used to go to, except for Sungmi and I.

 “No…” I replied, a little hesitantly, “I mostly lived in the hospital I guess…”
 “Were you really that sick before you came here?” she asked curiously.
“It started out with a few broken bones actually,” I confessed, “My father had beat me, and I was sent there, but I started seeing and hearing things and I tried killing myself, so I wasn’t allowed out.”

 “So, did you have anyone taking care of you? Friends or something?”
“My boyfriend…” The memory of Minhyuk helping me and taking care of me made a little smile creep around my lips.

 “How about you? Do you remember having anyone close?” I asked her, wanting to know something about her life as well.
 “I can, barely,” she stated, lighting up a little. “My elder brother always used to take care of me well. He meant the world to me.

 I cannot remember it clearly, but when they took me away, he was screaming and trying to convince them not to do so and he was held back. It was horrible…!”

 As I was looking at her, she only kept reminding me about Sungjae. Her eyes were the same, her hair colour was the same. Even her attitude and the way she acted was similar to how I remembered Sungjae.

 “Do you remember your brother’s name?” I asked, but she shook her head sadly.
 “No. I wish I could though.”

The time we spent together was not filled with laughter nor happy moments, it was just nice to have someone by my side, someone to talk to. Sungmi was only fourteen years old, but she was so mature for her age. Not that I was surprised. The girl had been locked inside of this hell since she was only five. God knows what she had experienced throughout that time.

 Like myself, she wore a lot of scars. Mostly, they were around her wrists and ankles, all made by ropes and chains. I was happy to hear that no one had ever abused her in the way I had experienced being treated. The last thing I wanted was for anyone to go through horrible things.

-

 “Eat up!”
“I can’t…”
 “I said; EAT UP!”
“I cannot eat this! It’s disgusting!”
 The loud sound of a palm hitting flesh could be heard repeatedly.

I was too scared to move, too scared to look up at him and tell him he was hurting me. I knew that if I did any further actions, I would regret it later.

 “Are you going to eat up or not?” I shook my head, letting tears fall. No matter what I did, I would be punished. If I ate up, I knew I would be sick and throw up, and that was good enough for them to decide and punish me. Either options would lead me nowhere, so why even try.

 I was yanked roughly up from the floor and led to a room by two of the workers, or prison-guards as I liked to call them. Once inside, the door was slammed shut and I was bent over on my knees, scared with my whole life, shaking and crying.

 “I thought you had learned not to disobey us by now,” one of them said in a deep voice, walking closer to me. “Seems like you must be reminded of the consequences.” Through a blurry vision, I could see the taller of the two, him who had not spoken yet, pick up a long and thick stick, while the first man went behind me and tied my wrists together.

 “Please…” I begged, my voice cracking and tears hitting the floor, but in response, the two of them laughed coldly.
 “You should have begged before. Now it’s too late,” the deep-voiced man said, tightening the rope so hard I was sure I lost all blood circulation in my hands.

 The tall man walked to stand in front of me, holding both hands around the stick. I looked at it with scared eyes, knowing exactly what he would use it for. I had been through this before. Even before I came to this place.

 He looked from me to the stick, then back at me, a sly smile forming around his lips.
 “Ready?” he asked, but before I could even think of a reply, he swung the stick and hit it against my bare shoulder. I cried out at the feeling of wood scratching my skin, blood sliding down from the newly created wound.

 The one with the deep voice was holding me in place as the tall man kept me harshly with the stick. After a while, he took his hands off of me, only to kick me to the ground. He kicked and kicked and just would not stop.

 “Come with me, I’ll help you.” I looked up, seeing a pale girl stand in the shadow by the wall, reaching a hand out to me. Her clothes were stained in blood, her visible skin scratched roughly. “What are you waiting for? Come!” I tried to reach out for her as well, but I was unable to fulfil my will.

 “Let’s leave it at here, she hopefully learned her lesson,” the deep voice came. They both left me there, chuckling between each other as they closed the heavy door behind of themselves.

 “Are they gone?” someone whispered. I could barely see her, but there was another girl sitting against the wall in the corner of the room, completely hiding in the shadow. 
 “Yes, they are gone,” the pale girl said, leaning against the wall.
“Sujung, you need to get out! They’ll kill you, ruin you! I’m begging for you to leave!” the girl who sat in the shadow said, her voice again only coming out as a whisper.

 “What they have done up to now is nothing compared to what they can do. You were already ill when you came here, you’ll die inside of here!” I felt my breath hitch up in my trout. I was scared, and I wanted to leave this place.

 As I felt myself panicking, I tried to remember what Minhyuk used to say when I was scared. I tried imagining having his arms around me, I tried to hear his voice telling me that everything was going to be fine, that he would stay right by my side. But it was all so distant. Minhyuk was distant. All my memories were distant. Something about this place made me forget, made it impossible to remember.

 I could not breathe, and as I was unable to calm down, I eventually passed out on the cold and hard ground, blood dripping and tears falling, no memories and only fear left.

• Six months later –

“Eonni, do you still remember everything?” Sungmi asked as we sat together in the library.
 “I remember something…” I replied, “I remember some of the few good times the most. Like the day I went playing with the ducks together with Minhyuk and Sungjae, I can remember that day very well. But I also remember the bad times that I experienced with my father.

 Although I can still remember Minhyuk, he’s fading away. He’s becoming a blurry picture, and I can’t even remember his voice clearly like I used to do. I don’t want to forget him…”
 “Everybody forgets what they left behind when they stay in this place, Eonni. I can’t even remember the name of my own family members, I only know I lived with my mother, father, elder brother and elder sister,” Sungmi comforted.

 I only let a sigh slip past my lips. It was hard, accepting that the memories would be gone. I did not want to accept that I was going to stay in this place and only take the pain I was given. I wanted to leave as soon as possible.

-

   (Minhyuk’s POV)

 Nine months and sixteen days. I could not sleep. I could not focus. My eyes were dark and tired. My mind was empty and angry. No matter where I searched, I could not find her. Sujung was gone, and I could not do anything.

 I was already in my last year at school, but still I did not go. I refused to rest before I found her and had brought her back. Ilhoon had more or less disappeared as well. He was not gone in the same way, he just completely refused to meet me or talk to me or even stay inside the same building as me. The few days I went to school, he left.

 “Minhyuk, can’t you please rest for only one day? You are starting to scare me. I promise we will find her, but for now, just lay down and rest,” Eomma begged, tears forming in her eyes as she spoke.
 “No. I can’t live if I don’t find her,” I told her, not taking my eyes off of my laptop as I searched the internet for any kind of place she could be in.

 “Eomma’s right,” Changhyuk pointed out, “you look awful. Maybe you have to accept that she’s gone.”
 I looked at him. “She’s still out there, I know she is! I will find her, and you will help me!”
 “It’s been almost a year,” he sighed.

“I’m going out.” I put away my laptop and stood up, walking out to the hall.
 “Where are you going?” Eomma asked, hurrying after me.
“I’m going to find her father. He probably knows where she is,” I explained, putting my shoes on.

 “We already tried looking for him! It doesn’t even look like he lives here any longer!” She took a hold of my arm, not wanting me to leave.
 “It’s worth trying.” I gave her a weak and assuring smile, and she let go of my arm.

 Walking to my car, my phone started ringing. I took it out, and seeing it was Eunkwang who called, I accepted it and put it by my ear.

 “What are you doing?” Eunkwang’s voice came.
“I’m going out,” I told him, closing the door of my car as I sat in the driver’s seat.
 “Ah, really? Come pick Sungjae and me up then.” I was not sure if this was a statement, but I guessed it was more of a command, so I went with it.

 “Sure, where are you?” I asked, starting the engine of the car.
“At Sungjae’s place. We’ll be expecting you soon,” he said, then hung up.

 By the time I arrived at Sungjae’s house, they were already standing outside, waiting for me.  As usual, Sungjae sat in the front passenger seat, while Eunkwang was forced to sit in the backseat.

 “So where are we going?” Sungjae asked as I started driving once again.
 “I’m going to track down that man once and for all,” I told him with a sigh.
 “Minhyukie, we already tried looking for him a million times,” Eunkwang stated, but I remained silent. I was tired of hearing them say I should give up.

I stopped the car a few houses away from where Sujung used to live. Usually, there would be no car outside in the driveway, but today was different. Today there was a car there, one I was sure I had seen there before.

 Patiently, I waited for any signs of the man I was hunting, while Sungjae and Eunkwang was playing a car game.
 “OH!” I suddenly noticed the door opening. Both of my friends were shocked by my sudden outburst, and Eunkwang was suddenly laying on the floor.

 “Is that him?” Sungjae asked, leaning closer to the front window for a better view. I nodded, starting the car yet again as I saw him enter his own.
 “Are we really following him?” Eunkwang asked, brows furrowed as he managed to crawl up from the ground and sit down in his seat, fastening his seat belt. Again, I nodded, driving carefully after.

When he finally pulled over, we were outside a bar. I quickly made myself ready to step outside the car and follow him, but both Eunkwang and Sungjae held me back.
 “Are you really going to follow him?” Eunkwang asked sagain. “You found the guy. Great! You know he still lives here! Now, let’s give it a rest.”

 “I can’t wait any more!” I shot back at him, “I can’t sit here and do nothing! He knows where she is, and I’ll make him tell me!”
 “You’re not sitting around doing nothing!” Eunkwang argued, “You’ve actually done a lot. You completely changed when she disappeared. We are the ones who actually can’t do anything because you won’t listen!”

 I decided to ignore him and shook their grips off of me roughly, before escaping the car and entering the bar. It did not take too long before I had searched the whole place and walked over to him.

 “Tell me where she is!” I grabbed him by the shoulder and slammed him into the wall. Everyone who was around went silent and I could feel all of their stares bore into my back. “Tell me!” I shouted once again, but all he did was laugh at me. I felt the heavy smell of alcohol from his breath.

 “I’ve looked everywhere for more than nine months! I need to know where she is!” Angry tears filled my eyes. After all this time I was about to break down. I was desperate to know where she was.

 “Then you obviously didn’t look good enough, kid,” he chuckled, a smirk forming around his lips.
 “I’ll do anything!” I slammed him against the wall, “Please! Tell me where she is!” At that point, my voice cracked and my tears were about to fall. “Why would you send her away? WHY?!”

 “I couldn’t afford having a daughter,” he said, sounding irritated, “Now get your hands off and go home.”
 “You could just have given her to me! I would never let her see you!” I yelled into his face, tightening my grip around his collar.
 “It’s not that easy to get rid of a child, you know,” he growled.
“Then I’ll make my family adopt her, anything to take her away from you.

 So tell me where she is!”
“I’ll give you a hint; she’s out of your reach.” He grinned evilly, teeth showing, the smell of alcohol hitting me strongly. That’s when my walls broke down. Using all my force, I started beating him. I hit him over and over again with my fist, hovering over him on the ground.

 “HYUNG! STOP!” I felt two pair of arms drag me off of the laughing man.
 “NO! HE KNOWS WHERE SHE IS!!” I tried fighting against their grip, but they were determined on dragging me outside.

 “MINHYUK, PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER!” Eunkwang shook me by my shoulders, glaring at me. “Look, I know it’s hard, but you can’t let this ruin you! You’ve been looking for so long, there’s almost no chance she is still out there!”

 I could not take it any longer. I fell to my knees, letting my sobs out.
“Hyung, it’s going to be all right,” Sungjae comforted, my back carefully. “Even if we don’t find her, it’s going to be fine.”

-

 Eleven months. Twenty days.

I was on the verge of giving up. But before I did, I had a few more hospitals to call. Every single time I asked if she was hospitalized at the place I had called, I received the same answer every single time; I’m sorry, there is no Kim Sujung here.

 After doing research on the internet for what seemed like forever, I had written a list of all kinds of hospitals that I had been dialling since she disappeared. Now, I only had one left, but as I was losing hope, I did not feel as if there was any point in dialling that last one. When I had not found her by now, what were the chance of finding her there? From what the internet said, this hospital was placed very north in South-Korea, standing alone in a completely abandoned place. What were the chances of anyone being there really?

  Even as much as I saw no use in it, I decided to dial the said number. It was my very last chance of finding her. It was worth a try.

 A woman answered the phone. She did not sound too young, neither did she sound old, but she did sound tired.
 “Hello, is there a Kim Sujung hospitalized here?” I asked.
“Just give me a second and I’ll check,” the woman replied, keeping silent for a moment. “Yes, there is.”

 I was taken aback. It felt like the whole world stopped around me. I wasn’t sure how to react.
 “I-is it possible to talk to her?” I stuttered.
“I believe so,” she said, “Just wait a few minutes.”

 I sat still, waiting for what seemed like forever. I was worried, even scared. It had been so long. After all this time, I would finally hear her voice again. It felt so unreal.

 “Yeoboseyo?”
I froze. “Ki-kitty?”
 “Minhyuk…?”

*Author’s Note*

Hello everybody!! I’m sorry I took so long to update, this chapter was just really hard to write :C

 I am so sorry for making this chapter so intense and dark! Honestly speaking, I got nightmares because of writing this thing!

 I’m sorry the chapter is a little shorter than usual, but it’s because I had (as I said) a hard time writing it, and I had no idea what else to put in this chapter.

 So they are finally able to speak with each other for a very long time!! I promise I will try my best and update the next chapter, but because May is one of those months in Norway where we celebrate all kinds of stupid things, I’m not sure if I’ll have so much time. Also, I’M GOING TO SEE 4MINUTE LIVE ON MAY 25TH! I’m so happy^^

Haha, please don't unsubscribe because it was so dark! I promise it will only become lighter from now on :D

 Anyways, please tell me what you think of the chapter in the comment section c: Upvote and Subscribe if you haven’t already. <3