bargain |ˈbärgən|

(n) an agreement between two or more parties as to what each party will do for the other

(v) negotiate the terms and conditions of a transaction

Myungsoo stood in front of the front gate. This was it, the place. It didn’t take him long to called Hoya and borrowed his car (and his map) and drove here by himself. He stared at the letter once again and closed his eyes, trying to guess how would Sungyeol looked like by now.

Is he still smiling? Showing off his gums? Can he talk? I miss the sound of his voice… How’s his cheek? Is it still fluffy? Is he still as talkative? I really really want to hear him talk as much as he wants. Just a bunch of random is fine as long as he’s talking to me. Can he move his hands? Can he play with my hair if I sleep on his lap again? He can, can’t he? Does he still read books there? Is he reading his book by now? Just like he used to.

Does he love me still?

Myungsoo took a deep breath and walked in to the nursing house. It was white and clean, too white to his liking.

“Hello, how can I help you?” The girl on the receptionist desk greeted him.

“I… I need to see one of your patients. It’s Sungyeol. He said he’s… Wait a sec.” he took the letter, “He’s in room 218.”

“You must be Kim Myung Soo then? It’s nice to finally see you. Here, your visitor card. He’s currently having an appointment, but you can wait in his room. It’s on the second floor.” Myungsoo nodded and took the card.

He was anxious, and nervous at the same time. It was a new feeling since he had never felt this way before. Not like this when it comes to Sungyeol. The nursing house was not that big, it was easy for him to find Sungyeol’s room. He stood in front of the door for a second. He knew the owner of the room wasn’t there. He just wanted to have a self-composure to help him go through whatever happened next.

It was a simple and small room. A bed on the corner, white sheets and wooden frame with a few plushies he recognized, he had given at least two of them to the owner anyway, a tv right in front of the bed, a sofa beside the bed, probably for visitors or nurses he thought, a simple desk and a cupboard. Myungsoo looked at the white wall beside the bed full of pictures, polaroids, tickets, paintings, and Myungsoo recognized every single one of them. The first movie ticket he had took Sungyeol to a midnight show, the ticket to the gallery where they would spent hours admiring at the paintings, sculpture or anything, really, a painting Myungsoo painted on Junior High it was a dandellion, sort of, he took pretty pictures, but drawing wasnt his forte. Pictures of Myungsoo that Sungyeol took secretly, pictures of Sungyeol that he took, and pictures of them.

Sungyeol never forgets him. He cannot.

Sungyeol still loves him after all. Always have, always will.

“Excuse me…?” Myungsoo got startled by gentle touch on his shoulder, he turned around to find it was another nurse, “Excuse me, but this is a private room, do you have a visitor card?”

“Sorry what? Oh… Oh… Yes… I… I’m Kim Myung Soo…” the nurse’s eyes got widen.

“So you are the Kim Myung Soo.”

“Umm… Yes…”

“Excuse me for a second…” the nurse walked outside. And then there he was on a wheelchair. The nurse pushed Sungyeol’s chair inside.

He’s still smiling. His cheek is gone though. His eyes still as warm. He got skinnier, his cheek… His hands, his wrist. My God his wrists are so small…

Dear Soo,

Hey! It’s been my what? 3^rd? 4^th? I think it’s 4^th isn’t it? So yes, this is my 4^th letter. How are you now? I’m sorry I didn’t write for you last month. I got caught up with something. , whom am I kidding with? You can pretty much tell I don’t write anymore, yes? Since all of the sudden my writing becomes pretty and neat. You must’ve guessed why, right? The nurse told me to stop being so stubborn. And meet you instead. The sooner the better they said. My family visited me yesterday. Sungjong told me you barged in to my room the other day. Did you find me there? Kekeke. Just kidding okay. To be quite honest, I miss you. And quite frankly, (in which I am going to regret this…) I really do want to meet you Soo… At least once if it's too much to ask… And by now, you know where to find me.

Love,

Yeol.

The nurse had left and Myungsoo still hadn’t talk. And neither Sungyeol. Sungyeol was looking at him, eyes full of question and love, until finally Myungsoo got the courage.

“Hi…”

“H…He..Llo..” Sungyeol stuttered and smiled apologetically. And it pained Myungsoo. Knowing his lover in front of him was in pain. and he couldn't do anything about it.

And it pained him, knowing that he wouldn't get to hear another I love you from the person he love the most.

------------------------​------------------------​------------------------​------------------------​------------------------​------------------------

hello! how are you guys, i'm sorry for a short update. But I owe you guys one, since I wasnt updating for (a bit) too long. okay so, i'm finally going to finish my diploma on october. yippeee ki-yay! and i'll be screaming yeollie's name on the top of my lungs next week right below him. (well that sounds wrong) sort of.... since i'll be going to the OGS tour.... and he'll be on stage.... and i'm not.... therefore.. yes. i'll be 1metre below him. make sense now? No? okay. Should anyone who's going to OGS meet up? yes? no? too awkward?? hahahaha. just saying :D 

anyway, thank you thank you thank you all for your support by reading, commenting, subscribing and even upvoting this story. it means a lot to me. i am terribly sorry for the grammatical error and the typos all along the road, i am a crappy writer when it comes to prove checking. without your support i dont think i could write anymore chapter since the pilot chapter. knowing that i at it. BUT. because of you guys, i am able to write until 29 chapters, along with my side oneshot-challenge. (so happy i could die) and then again. i have to say this, THANK YOU ALLLLLLL. I WOOF YOU GUYS. (too cheesy now? yes? no?)