“Ah, Taemin-ah… You can be so easy to tease,” I snickered as I walked back to my bedroom. “Cute too,” I smiled to myself as I took in his blushing face. “No wonder why she’s so conflicted,” I began to empathize with Mi-ja.

“Even I would fall for his charms.”

I felt a hand brushing softly against my forehead, fingers gathering the loose strands of my hair.

I slowly opened my eyes, my vision blurry without my glasses.

…Umma?

Blinking slowly, I stared at her long golden hair as she sat beside my bed.

“Mi-ja? Time to eat,” a voice that sounded nothing like my mother came out from her. I let out a sigh and buried my face into the pillow, now remembering that I am living temporarily at SHINee’s dorm.

This is not my room at all.

I protested last night that I am fine to go back home afterwards, but they went against it. Now I am here, actually living with idols.

The hell…

Min-Ae patted my shoulder as she stood up from the bed. “Come on, Kibum would be upset if you didn’t come down for breakfast,” she told me as she walked towards the door. “Kangdae and I will go back home to grab some of your things since you’re living here for the time being, just letting you know in case if you didn’t see us around,” she informed me before she left the guest room.

I laid still in the covers before sitting up, looking around with squinted eyes.

The name ‘Kibum’ reawakened the equivalent shattered reminiscences that I cannot recollect so well. I blinked, focusing my vision on the mattress before cleaning the corners of my eyes to get rid of the gross eye boogers.

“I should hurry,” I mumbled to myself as I picked up my glasses from the nightstand next to me before noticing the tear stains on the pillow.

I chuckled to myself, realizing that I had cried in my sleep.

I need more time to take this in…

Swinging my legs over the edge of my bed, I got up from the soft mattress. I hoped my eyes were not red enough to be noticeable. I smoothed down the blue jersey Minho gave me, feeling the warmth touching my skin underneath the material.

I flushed at the thought of Minho wearing this. Geez, I am wearing so many things that belongs to the members: first, it was Key’s beanie, and then it was Taemin’s Mickey Mouse t-shirt; now it is Minho’s jersey. I would not be surprised if Jonghyun and Onew lent me something to wear.

The door handle turned slowly in my hand as I pulled the door open. I almost collided into a body when I took one-step forward.

I looked up to see Taemin, his fist raised as if he was going to knock on the door. I watched as his hand slowly went down to his side, his fingers nearly twitching as he stared at me.

“Ah…”

He only let out a sound, his lips parted open as he was going to say something but interrupted himself by closing his mouth, sealing them tightly. They clamped so securely that it almost seemed like he would never talk again.

Then he smiled.

It startled me a bit, because he was like not that for some time. My stomach was hurting from hunger and I noticed that I have to go and get something to eat soon. However, I am unable to do that for this man is blocking my way.

“How are you feeling?” He questioned.

“Good,” I reacted, rapidly and modestly as possible. My single word cut him sharper than I meant it to be. He must be doing a good job of not letting it show because he nodded and hummed.

The brunet whistled a soft tune, running his fingers through his black hair, his brown eyes still on me. He was still grinning whenever he made eye contact with me.

I was not. I only had a blank face on staring back at him.

Knowing that I would not give in easily, his smile wavered until it was gone, his eyes interchanged with regret.

He should know by now. He was the one at fault for creating the first damage before my step-mother finalized it.

I narrowed my eyes at him as my stomach began to growl a little bit louder this time. Taemin seems to get the hint and stepped aside, not saying anything.

I walked out and past him, not making eye contact. It was not long before he grabbed my wrist, preventing me to go any further. I stopped in my steps, my eyes looking straight ahead as I heard his rigid breathing between the two of us.

“I’m sorry,” he breathed out, his fingers bending around my wrist.

I know what he wants me to do and I am not giving that to him easily.

He is never going to let me go until I forgave him.

I clenched my hand into a fist, my hand shaking in distress and pried my arm out of his clutch, walking away as I said nothing to him.

Not yet. Let him suffer for a bit. Not yet.

As I went down the stairs, the sight of a smiling angel greeted me.

“How are you?” Onew asked once I stepped foot into the living room.

I shrugged my shoulders. “Eh, could’ve been better,” I responded.

He grinned then. “Key made some pancakes for you. We already have ours so you’re the last to sit down and eat,” he pauses for a moment before continuing, his tone changing into a joking manner. “And I’m sure he made you your favorite drink~”

I rolled my eyes with a groan. “Give me a break, please!” I moaned as I walked away from the living room. I said that, but my heart is just tingling at the thought of ‘strawberry milk’.

Onew pulled up a face. “I liked you better when you were clinging onto my arm, chanting ‘strawberry’ repeatedly like it was a prayer.”

“Don’t remind me,” I covered my eyes with a hand as I took a seat in the dining room. “I wasn’t in my usual self, OK?”

I heard footsteps behind me. I looked up to see Key setting my plate full of pancakes down in front of me, along with a large cup filled with strawberry milk.

I stared at the delicious breakfast in awe before looking at Key with a bright grin.

“I swear Key; whoever marries you is a lucky woman to have you. I can just imagine waking up to this in my bed!” I squealed as I picked up my fork before catching his raised eyebrows.

Then I blushed, realizing what I have said. “I mean, not that I’m the one you’re going to marry, t-that would be absurd!”

My ears gradually grew bright red when he sat next to me, his hand on his cheek as he rested his elbow on the table, his eyes still on me.

I stabbed one of the syrup-and-butter-covered pancake, abruptly shoving it into my mouth. “Dis is wreally gud!” I was talking in stupid English with my mouth full. It was improper of me, but if it will hide my embarrassing situation, then I will do it for time’s sake.

Key only laughed at my reaction, brushing a strand of loose hair away from my face (so that I would not accidentally eat my own hair) and wiped my cheek with his thumb where the syrup has splashed itself on.

“You’re so cute I want to kiss you,” he told me. I only let out a growl.

“Shut up,” I muttered under my breath as I took a large sip of my strawberry milk, downing half the cup. No more kisses from him for the time being, I am still suffering here.

Now is not really the time to soften up especially when it comes to both Taemin and my step-mother who were at fault for this.

Nobody but me that Taemin was also involved for the damage in my heart. Moreover, as much I want him to get the blame, I did not want him to end up in a hospital because then it will be my fault in the end. That alone is much worse than just accusing him of seeing me in my underwear.

I heard footsteps from the staircase and glanced towards the person who walked past the dining room before looking away after seeing that it was Taemin.

I felt bad when I caught a glimpse of his enflamed eyes, his disheveled, fluffy black hair and his unusually pale face before he walked out of my view, probably sneaking into Key’s bedroom for something. Key didn’t notice him sneaking into his bedroom as he’s too busy watching me in such a mother like manner, but Onew, who was watching the TV in the living room, was a bit surprised to see him in such a state after spotting him.

I looked away when the leader made eye contact with me, acting as if to not have noticed as I resumed eating my appealing brunch. Although I cannot forgive him right now, I cannot help but feel guilty, knowing that once I released myself from his grasp, he was crying to him.

Maybe I am making him suffer a little bit too much.

Nevertheless, it is too late for that now, is it. Now we actually have two people breaking down—just one of them is unknown to the human eye and the media.

I yelped, almost choking on my breakfast when arms wrapped around my collar tightly.

“Jesus, Min! Are you trying to kill me? I almost died from choking!” I yelled once I had my throat back, clear from the food blockage that I received in my throat from the surprise I gained.

Min giggled in my ear and loosened her hold on me. “I’m so glad you’re feeling better! I was about to cry seeing you!” She finally pulled away and took a seat next to me on my right side.

I let out a sigh as I ate my pancakes, suffering a series of two pairs of eyes at the table this time.

“You two…you—you just love to stare at me, don’t you?”

They chuckled and both high-fived each other from behind my seat. I shook my head at this immature behavior. Ridiculous, I thought. I quickly finished my plate and moved the empty glass away from me as I stood up. “I’m going to wake up Minho, that sleepyhead,” I informed them as I turned, almost running right into Jonghyun.

I took one good look at him and laughed, but quickly quietened down when I saw that he is seriously disturbed so I feigned astonishment instead.

“Jonghyun, what happened to your eye?” I question as I pointed at his right eye.

He had the sickest black eye and he clearly did not look so happy with it. Looks like the stylist is going to use a lot more concealer than that for his schedule.

He pointed at Min who cowered under his glare. “Ask her,” he hissed before walking off into the kitchen to make himself breakfast.

I rose an eyebrow at her. “Okay, what did you do to make Jonghyun hate you for life?”

“It was a reflex! He was waking me up and I accidentally did my usual wake-up routine, thinking that he was an alarm clock… I’ve forgotten that I was sleeping in his room, not in my house.” She bit her lower lip and looked down for a moment, feeling guilty as she began to look back at it, as if remembering his shocked face which then contorted to a blank (yet mad?) expression.

I can actually imagine that – he is a not a type of person who holds everything inside. Just one look at his face and you will know.

“Do you think he’ll be mad at me forever?”

I scoffed, thinking that it is appalling for the male to hate her after telling me that he loves her. I mean, you must be kidding me—you cannot hate on someone you admitted you are in love with! That would make no logical sense. “No way, he loves you too much to even do that. Just soften him up with aegyo and he’ll give in.”

“Hmm…” Min tapped a finger on her chin before smirking, “should I give him a punch to make him apologize?”

I gave her a look. Key was looking at her with narrowed eyes as if judging her. I said, “No, that would be a little bit drastic.”

“How,” Key started, “I mean, seriously tell me—how that dino came to fall in love with a violent woman like you?”

Min shrugged. “Love is blind, as Jjong would put it,” she told us.

Now I understood why they seemed like a perfectly good match together: they both have their ways of putting their appalling stupidity to use.

Pushing them aside as their love problems and their quarrels are none of my own business; I went up the stairs. I wanted to get into Minho’s bedroom to wake him up because he was not in the kitchen nor in the living room since I woke up from my sleep that I wished I could have slept for a little longer.

Going to his room again makes my heart pound. It is not because I am the one waking him up or the fact that I might accidentally forget to knock and walk into him changing (God forbids if that happens again) but mostly because of the missing photo of which I have stolen from him.

Did he even notice that it was gone?

I paused in my steps as I thought of the only one photo hidden underneath the camera before pulling up a face, furrowing my eyebrows. I scarcely doubt it. He barely have time to check out his things due to his schedule—it’s a miracle that he has few today, I thought to myself as I resumed walking, my bare feet thumping softly on the cool, wooden floor.

Besides, even if he did, I will brace myself for it. I will brace myself for his angry side that I have already witnessed. His furious side that would choke me, his hands around my neck. He would clutch onto my wrists until it feels like it will break beneath his strength any time soon. He did that before, and even if he promised not to do it, he will do it again.

Promises are made to be broken, you know.

Besides, the fight between Taemin and I was an example. He caught me off guard last time, which resulted into me exposing the item I was going to take with me. I will make sure that it would not happen again and try to make a comeback if necessary.

Although it may not be possible if he has anaesthetized me with his wrath that hardly ever comes around.

After walking down that familiar ‘twist-and-turn’ hallway, I stood in front of his door, listening into the noises inside the room. I let out a chuckle when I heard a snore from the other side of the door.

Boy, he really sleeps a lot, I shook my head as I placed my hand on the doorknob, twisting it around and pushing it open. I peeked inside the room, the bedside showing up first. Instead of his head on the pillow, I saw his foot. I snickered at the sight as I stepped further in, seeing Minho in an unusual position.

His head was on the end of the bed, his arm dangling out from the edge. He has completely switched places on the bed, not sleeping in a position where he is supposed to be sleep.

Not that it matters anyway. It is a bed, for goodness’ sake; the only thing you can do on it is sleep.

As well as other things, I thought to myself with reddened cheeks before shaking them out of her head. But you know what I mean!

I tiptoed my way towards him, seeing his messy bedhead and his closed eyes, sleeping innocently without a care in the world. His snores grew louder with each small step I made on my path to him, his mouth parted open just a bit.

Is that drool? Gross, I scrunched my nose as I crouched down to his eye level, curiosity getting the best of me as I examined his sleeping face. Choi Minho, your fans will freak if they knew I saw how you sleep. God, you need to keep that to yourself.

“Be glad you have your own bedroom,” I muttered under my breath as I remembered the fact that SHINee once shared a large room together as a bedroom since their debut, five beds cramped inside that zone. Now that they all have their own room (aside for Onew who is sharing his with the manager), they all have equal privacy.

I reached out to touch his red-tinted brown hair, his bangs covering his eyes. The locks felt soft under my touch as I swept them away.

“Minho,” I began to say in a soft tone, patting his shoulder. “Wake up; you’re going to miss your breakfast at this rate.”

He didn’t move for quite some time, but after a while as I continued to pat his shoulder, shaking him a little, his eyebrows furrowed, telling me that he had heard my wake-up call. He shifted in the body, groaning as he covered my hand with his large one.

“I’ll be up soon,” he mumbled, his eyes still closed. I did not trust him with his words as soon as I removed my hand from his hair. I growled when I heard him snore, knowing that he has gone back to sleep.

“Yah, wake up!” I shouted as I rolled him over, his face directed towards the ceiling before I got on the bed and tugged onto his arms, trying to get him to sit up. “Come on, get up!” I whined, as he struggled against my grip, wanting to go back on the bed. He let out a groan, shaking his head while I pulled his body upright.

I yelped when he gripped my arms, tugging me onto his chest and laid back down in the bed, me being on top of him.

My heart thudded at the sudden closeness, his arms wrapped around my waist as he went back to sleep. I squirmed around, but god, his strength is unbelievable!

“Minho~ let go of me!”

“No, you’d make the perfect teddy bear for me,” he purred, snuggling his chin on my head.

I let out a huff, my cheeks and ears burning red before I sat up, my legs straddling his lower body as his arms wrapped around me. I raised my fists and began to hit his chest.

Hard.

Minho coughed from the hard impacts I gave him and finally blinked open his eyes, his brown eyes glistening as he saw me. “Okay, okay! I’ll get up!” Moreover, he did, at last, but he did not know that I was still on top of him and I had forgotten to get off him before he did. He came up at once, his nose nearly touching mine.

We blinked, staring into each other’s eyes before both our faces turned red. This was not how a wake-up call would end. I pushed myself off him, getting the bed and brushing myself, hiding my reddened face by having my back on him.

“Uh,” I cleared my throat, coughing out the dryness. “Just come downstairs for breakfast.” I paused, glancing at him with pink cheeks before smiling a little. “And, uh…you have a bit of a… morning wake-up down there.”

Minho looked at me confusedly before looking down. I glanced at him and saw his colored face, grabbing the pillow to hide the small tent in his pants, getting a morning wood as soon as he woke up.

I actually felt that when I was on top of him… oh gosh, that was even more embarrassing. I left the room as soon as possible, not wanting to stay in the awkwardness any longer.

I was wrong, I thought with a shake of my head, walking back downstairs, that was much more blemishing than seeing Minho .

Min-Ae and Kangdae were back by the time Minho finished eating. I thanked them for the hard work and apologized for making them drive all the way back home to get my stuff, but they did not mind.

“What about Appa?” I asked of him during that time. “What…what did he say about me moving away from the house temporarily?”

Min-Ae looked at Kangdae before smiling at me. “He said that if it will help you recover until you are ready to come back, then he shouldn’t oppose to it. He was actually glad that you got out of the house for some time, he didn’t want you to suffer again seeing your step-mother—my mom, I mean.”

I nodded, understanding her. “I know,” I replied and stood quiet for a while. “Thanks anyway,” I answered, taking my one of my suitcases. Then I remembered about the yellow cardigan I left on my bed before I abandoned my own home. I hope it is inside one of these luggages…

Kangdae stopped me, his hand on my wrist as he shook his head with a smile. “Don’t. We’ll get these luggages up to the room for you.” I blinked at him before nodding with a small smile on his face, watching him drag one of my luggage towards the stairs. Min-Ae was helping as well, before she paused and looked into the dining room.

“Yah, Minho, help us with this!”

“What, now?”

“Yes, now, you lazy Frog face!”

I heard Key laughing from behind. I have to admit, it did sound much funnier in my head. Footsteps came closer to me as I looked up at the face of Choi Minho himself. I looked away embarrassingly, the remains of this morning incident still fresh in my mind as he left as quickly as he came, the baggage in his hand.

I went into the dining room and sat down at the table. Onew and Min were no longer in the living room or around the area for all that matters—I believe Min has gone back into Jonghyun for more sleep (she’s worse than Minho) and Onew is studying the pieces from our vocal classes. Jonghyun must have left for a morning schedule – possibly for his radio talk schedule, and Taemin…

As for Taemin…

…

Actually, I do not know even where he is. Last I saw was when he was going into Key’s room, but that was it before I went upstairs. Now I do not even know where he is.

I do not even know where everybody else is! It feels weird being here alone when I was so used to having the constant chatters and whatnots. It is understandable, I thought to myself with a pull of my lips. If everyone is so busy, then it cannot be helped then.

“Hey,” Key whispered beside me, his lips near my ear.

I have forgotten that he was still here.

I jumped in surprise, my eyes wide from his sudden gesture. Key smiled at me before it faltered a little. “Are you alright?”

I furrowed my eyebrows at him. “Of course I am. Why do you say that?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s just… you seems to be thinking a lot this morning.”

I looked away for a moment before silently agreeing with him. I have been thinking a lot today. In addition, it is only the start of the morning! Was this because of Minho and Taemin? I have to get this love thing solved eventually. If it will continue, it will cause worry for the rest of the group and even drive me crazy into thinking too much.

“You…you could say that. Actually,” I paused for a second before smiling softly at him. “It’s about my love life…”

“Love life you say?” Key was highly interested now, his arms propped up on the table as he scooted closer to me. “Tell me what’s troubling you, Mi-baby. I might be able to help,” he told me. I chuckled at this, knowing that sometimes he is the love guru around here.

I nodded in response to his statement. “I found out that I’m in love with two people,” I told him.

His feline eyes went wide slightly before chuckling. “Two people? Hmm, they must have got you bad if there are two people you are in love with. Are they people I know?”

I nodded.

“And is both of them amongst us?”

I nodded again.

Key held up his hand, counting the men here. “Obviously, not Kangdae,” he murmured to me with a smirk. I gave him a playful shove on the arm, laughing at the absurdness of his answer.

“Of course not! I love Kangdae; I do, but only like a brother to me! I can’t see him romantically!”

“And it’s not me either because I just told you, duh,” he did his extravagant eye rolling which automatically made me think that this is the reason why he’s labelled as ‘The Diva’. “Onew seems way too old for you.”

I rose an eyebrow at him. I was glad that he did not include Onew into my love problems because, after all, he did admit to me that he likes Luna. That man needs to confess to her soon, seriously. I have done my part with Jonghyun, now it is time for me to do my part for Onew.

However, that was rude to call him old, despite the nickname Onew always got and did not mind of Old Man.

“That was unkind of you. He’s not that old.”

Key looked at me with raised eyebrows before jeering, running his fingers through his ashy brown locks. “Mi-baby, Onew is almost in his thirties. Hell, he is half of fifty! You are soon to be in your twenties by what—June? How much of an age difference is that?”

“…Point taken.”

“Anyway, as I was saying,” he resumed his so-called ‘love list’ for me as he counted, “Jonghyun is dating Min so he couldn’t have really liked you more than a friend. That would leave…” He paused, looking up from his fingers, eyes straight on me. I nodded, pulling up a face to show my troubles.

“Oh,” he whispered.

I let out a sigh. “Yup. Minho and Taemin. It’s the two of them.”

Key sat silent before smiling. “Wow, you’re in love with the two most preferred members of SHINee. I am not so surprised actually. What I am surprised the most, however, is when you liked me!”

I groaned, pushing the laughing boy away. “Key-umma! This is critical here!” Then I held my head in my hands, sighing deeply now as I thought of the issues I am having with both of them. First, Minho will find out that I stole one of his photos and will explode on me any time soon, and secondly, Taemin is broken because of me, and his stupidity for not understanding me better. I am torn here. “What am I going to do? I cannot even set my mind straight on both of them! How the hell am I supposed to give them my answer when I can’t tell between even my own feelings for them?”

I felt fingers playing with my hair. I looked up to see the motherly smile of my friend. “Well, I can’t tell you who to choose as that would be unfair,” he told me before smoothing the locks down my back, his hand pressing against my skin. “Have you figured out who understand you the most?”

I stood silent for a minute before replying, “Both of them. Both of them have understood me but,” I swallowed my spit to clear my dry throat before resuming, “Nowadays, it’s just Minho who understands me. Taemin wasn’t even trying anymore.”

“Then…who connects to you more?”

I paused, sitting in silence. Honestly, I do not even know. I do not know who relates to me more. If I had my forgotten memories back, I would know, but right now, I have no clue.

“I don’t know,” I answered him this instead, my voice soft.

Key looked at me. He really looked at me, his eyes studying my face before sighing. “Mi-ja,” he started, his hand now holding mine. “Love is a crazy feeling. It can even drive you to the point where you want to rip your own hair out. It can make you choose the options that can be right or wrong. But love,” he paused for a moment before smiling. “Love is a good feeling. It can make you soar in the sky and gives you millions of butterflies in your stomach. Sometimes it’ll make your face red and gives you the inability to speak properly.”

I stared at the visual before smiling knowingly at him. “You sounds as if you actually had some experience with this before.”

“I’m not going to lie when I say this,” he said while chuckling. “You were amazing. You were the most beautiful person that I have ever set eyes on and I will always think of you. But long after you, I met another girl.”

Now this is getting interesting. I am beginning to like this love drama. I propped my elbows on the table, my chin on the palms of my hands. “Tell me more. Who is this girl you speak of?”

He shook his head, his cheeks red. “You’re blushing~” I teased, poking his reddened skin. He only groaned and brushed my hand away.

“Fine, I’ll tell you, but you’ll be shocked if I told.”

“Just tell me!”

The brunet let out a sigh, a hand on his temple as he looked away for a while before whispering to me, “It’s Park Min-Ae.”

. . .

“What—”

“Be quiet!”

I covered my mouth with both hands; my eyes wide as the said girl came downstairs, not passing us a glance as she grabbed the last of my luggage by the door. As she turned back to the stairs, she looked at us, seeing our shocked expression.

“Mwo? What is it?”

“Nothing,” we both said in unison, a smile on our faces. “Just talking about things.”

Min-Ae gave us an odd look. “What kind of ‘things’ are you talking about?”

“You know,” Key started with a shrug. “Things.”

She stared at us curiously before shaking her head slowly. “O-kay…” She stressed out the ‘O’ in English before quietly walking away. “Don’t mind me, just putting away suitcases,” she mumbled out before she went up the stairs. We both made sure that she was out of sight before letting out a relieved sigh.

I yelped out in pain when Key smacked my arm with strong strength. “Are you out of your mind? You could have got me found out!”

“Mianhae! I was just shocked after hearing the name!” I clasped my hands in front of me as an apology. Then I leaned in closer to his reddened face as I whispered, “But dude, you’re in love with Park Min-Ae? My step-sister? The girl who scolded you for acting like a ?”

“I know it’s strange! But I just…I just fell for her.”

I rose my eyebrows at this, leaning back into my seat. “When did this start?”

“During Su-Min’s party.”

I gazed at him, feeling baffled before laughing. Key pouted at me, shoving me lightly to the side. “Shut up! It was love at first sight!”

“More like love at first hit,” I giggled, knowing how her red high heel hit Key back then. I do not know how he fell in love with her from that.

Key shoved my head aside angrily, causing me to laugh at his cute, upset reaction. He pursed his lips as he furrowed his eyebrows at me. “Shut it, I still hate her for that. Anyway, that is not the point. That hit of hers was not the cause that made me like her. It was a little later during that time.”

“And when was that, exactly?” I rose an eyebrow at him to make him prove his point.

“Her admittance to you.”

I blinked at him, letting him continue what he is saying.

He let out a sigh, his eyes averted to the rainbow ring on my finger. “When she brazenly admitted that she’s your step-sister and that she loves you as a friend, I felt touched and…proud of her. During our plan, I saw it. Despite a few errors in the operation, I saw them. Those two eyes full of determination, the want to succeed and to protect those she loves…” He sat silent for a while before continuing, “If I didn’t know her, I would have thought that she was your biological sister.”

I snorted. “Seriously? You saw me in her?”

“I’m not kidding, Mi-ja,” he looked at me with a serious expression that I gradually ceased my laughing matter. I could not laugh if he’s firm about it. “That’s when I fell in love with her. Even when she did—literally—dunked me into the pool, she still dragged me out with worried eyes as if wondering if she had taken it too far.” He sighed. “I’m crazy, right? I have fallen in love with a former enemy whom I disliked when she hated you. She’s that same girl I ed on and yet, I fell for her.”

I sat in my seat, silent. I understand now. Love is so strong, that it can even make you fall in love with a person whom you thought was your enemy. It is a crazy thing, yes, but as he said, it is a pleasant feeling as well.

“Which is why,” his voice broke me out of my thoughts, his attention now focused on me. “I can’t choose who’s better for you. It is best if you chose one of them yourselves. Focus on how they act around you. Focus on who is more reliable, more caring, and more willing to be with you than the latter. I don’t care who you choose, whether it’s Frog face Minho or Oblivious Taemin.” I snickered at his nicknames for them. “I just hope you chose the person who fits everything you expects of him, even if it’s not much.”

Like understanding my concerns, being patient with me…I want one of them to fit those categories for me.

However, as I looked at Key, that was not what I was interested in anymore. As I observed him, it was not my center of attention when I began to see the familiarities in him, that smile of his, the warmth in his brown eyes.

I stared at the brunet, examining his sharp features, his feline eyes and bow-shaped pink lips… I thought of his real name as I stared at him.

“What’s wrong?” Key asked me, his eyebrows furrowed as I continued to stare at him.

I stared at him for a little longer before blinking. There, right before me, was a younger version of Key, sitting in that same seat as he looked at me. I blinked again, my vision returning to normal as I furrowed my eyebrow. “Who are you? Why are you hiding from me?”

His eyes widened in shock. “I…I don’t know what do you mean by that. Mi-baby, are you all right? Do…do you need something to drink?”

Nervous, I thought to myself as I heard the stutter in his voice. He is nervous.

“Kibum…” I started, staring at his every joints. I watched as his fists immediately clenched, his muscles tensing up. “Oppa…” I finished, trying out his real name. “Who are you?” I questioned him again. “Why are you in my memories?” I bluntly said this, no longer wanting to keep quiet about it now. I cannot seem to keep quiet, not when Kibum also appeared in my broken memories.

I would have stayed still if it was just Taemin appearing in my head, but since another member of SHINee is also appearing in my forgotten recollections and that Taemin has (drunkenly) given me information, I wanted to know if my suspicions was correct.

He abruptly stood up from his seat and excused himself, stumbling over his words as he walked away, exiting the dining room. I turned around in my seat and followed him with my eyes, watching him go down the hallway until he disappeared when he took a turn.

After his disappearance, a strong pain occurred in my head. I clutched onto my head, my eyes squeezing shut.

“Hey, you jerks, look over here!”

I could see myself standing in front of a group of boys, a rock in hand. I was in front of a boy on the ground, as if I was protecting him.

Why? Why was I protecting him?

“Are you okay, oppa?”

I recognized that face instantly as he looked up at me, his face in pain and full of bruises. He shook his head sadly, his eyes full of sorrow and hurt.

“Geez, be careful! You could have gotten hurt!”

I saw his upset face then, a Band-Aid on his cheek as he held the silver tray full of cookies and two glasses of milk.

“Oppa~ I am okay!”

Why did I say that then? I let out a soft groan, opening my eyes to see flashes of white, absorbed into my own memories.

I could see them now—me sitting right next to the boy, who seems to be a bit shocked by the sudden closeness. I could almost feel his eyes on me as he silently examined my five-years-old self, his attention on my hand that has white, thin gauzes wrapped around it.

Did I get that during the fight? How?

“What’s your name?” I heard myself ask.

He looked like he is pondering on whether he should tell or not as he stared at me, examining the features on my face before he finally answered, looking away, “Kibum.”

I knew it.

He seemed to have paused for a moment before asking back the same question as I, “What’s yours?”

“I’m Mi-ja!” I chimed out, a bright grin on my face.

…

I closed my eyes, the white light blinding me before opened them once it was gone, switching myself back to reality. I raised my head from the table, my eyes staring at the glass doors out the balcony in the living room before sitting up, now taking in what I have remembered—or what remains I have remembered, that is…

Taemin’s right, I assumed as I looked down at my rainbow ring. SHINee did know me when I was younger. I fiddled with the accessory in my left hand before looking up, my eyes holding a weird glint.

SHINee, do not bother try to hide your secrets from me anymore. I will find out eventually. I will know the reason why you kept them from me soon. I will.

I may be able to peek behind your veils that is full of secrets.

…

You cannot run away from me.

Taemin’s POV

I stared at myself in the mirror as the three member of SHINee sat around in Onew’s bedroom. We used to sleep in this room with five beds since our debut, and as Onew has taken a liking to this area, he did not want to move out of it and instead, stayed in with our manager.

His bedroom was ordinary, as it should be in every person’s bedrooms. With a bed and a large space for sitting around, it just felt ordinary.

“Is Mi-ja improving well?” I hear Onew ask Jonghyun. I looked just in time to see him nodding.

“Yes, she is. Well, I think she is. She might be showing us that she’s fine just to make us stop worrying for her,” he replied, his lips pursed as he played with his light blond bangs.

Minho let out a sigh. “I’m still upset with the fact that her step-mother killed her mother. She seemed like a very nice woman…” A sigh emerged from the male. “It’s a pity that I couldn’t have known her more.”

“At least Key saw the most of her; well, that is what he told us,” said Onew. “Anyway, is it alright to tell us this, Jonghyun? Mi-ja could get upset that you told us about the car accident she ended up in.”

“Well, then how am I going to clear up the misunderstanding we had on her? It’s best to clear this up now than to continue wondering why she has forgotten us or why hadn’t she not returned a week after just as she said she would,” he huffed, crossing his eyes over his chest.

“I suppose he’s right,” Minho agreed. “We all thought she lied to us and never wanted to come back or has forgotten us on purpose. How were we supposed to know that she was in hospital during that time? We didn’t even have her phone number to know where she is!”

Jonghyun crossed his legs in his sitting position, his body bouncing a bit on the bed. “I have a hunch on how she forgotten us, but I don’t think it’s correct. Even if it was, it’s unlikely for her to remember us during the past 14 years.”

“She can’t remember now. We yet have to prepare a surprise for her. That most important memory can’t be remembered yet and that’s why we have to make as much progress we have with her,” Onew’s voice was firm as serious.

I am sorry Mi-ja; I thought as I remembered how harsh I was for taking away the music box. Nevertheless, this is for the best.

I stood silent, just listening to everything. I did not notice that they stopped talking until I looked up, seeing their eyes on me. I blinked, shocked to see them staring at me. “M-Mwo?”

Jonghyun shrugged. “I don’t know. The fact that you’re being creepily quiet today is what’s up.”

“Gwaenchana?” Onew inquired me, his eyebrows rose at me as he worried for me, just as a leader should do.

“Gwaenchana,” I answered back, nodding my head.

Jonghyun thought otherwise. He furrowed his eyebrows at me as he examined my face. “I don’t think you are. I can see you put on concealer underneath your eyes.”

, was it so obvious? I thought it matched my skin color! “I was just tired, okay?” I forced the words to come out, putting so much pressure into it as if I was saying ‘just take these words and leave me alone’.

Sadly, it failed to work as Onew continued on, “You know, you’ve been like that since last night as well, since Mi-ja went missing. In addition, you never spoke a word even when Mi-ja has spoken to us that night. I find it strange, really, that you are acting strange around her, and she is doing the same to you.” He paused his speech for a while, his eyes taking in every small details of me before saying, “And something tells me that you two are not in a…pleasant situation.”

“Jinjja?” Jonghyun exclaimed in surprise. His eyes were so big that I feared that they were going to pop out. However, Minho did not look so surprised. I know he was not – he confronted me about it that night. “Did something happen between you two?”

Eyes.

I could feel their eyes on me. I could imagine their disappointed looks once I told them. Even if it were for a reason, they would be upset that I caused such mental injury to her.

I looked away from Minho’s burning gaze, biting my lower lip as I blinked, not wanting to show them the current state of my eyes.

“I—”

“Guys!”

I mentally thanked Key-hyung for interrupting at the right moment as he barged into the room, barely out of breath. His disheveled hair was pointing in all directions, as if he has been running.

“She,” he panted, trying to get his breath. “She knows. She knows!”

“What?” Jonghyun gasped. “Already? How?”

Key closed the door behind him and slid down it, sitting down on his rear as he placed his hand over his chest, feeling his racing heart. “The moment she said, ‘Who are you,’ I knew. And the moment she called me, ‘Kibum-oppa,’ I left the area as quickly as possible.” Then he looked up at us. “She’s beginning to remember me. She does not remember me fully yet, but she’s beginning to. And it wasn’t the first time either.” He took a deep breath before telling us this, “Remember when I said that she collapsed on the ground in the playground of my old school? She did remember that time. I thought she hadn’t breached through the second part, which would be safe for us—and believe me, I was glad that she was beginning to remember—but she knew of my name then, which was when I was at her house.”

“Damn,” Minho hissed. “I should have known this would happen. She is beginning to get suspicious of us.”

Jonghyun looked worriedly at Minho. “You don’t think she’s…?”

“She might as well have. She must be thinking we are using her. She must be convinced that we only wanted to get close to her, only to hurt her in the end because we ‘hate’ her.”

Key scoffed. “I would never!”

“We wouldn’t do that to her, of course, but then again, we did appear to her suddenly the first day we met and we did seem a little bit too close to her. Maybe she did not notice at that time, but as we progressed, she is beginning to come around. And I wouldn’t be surprised if she did, we did seem a little too happy and possessive of her,” Minho concluded, which brought a few hums of understanding, Jonghyun muttering, “You’ve got a point there…”

My mind was in a race. How can this be? Nobody had told her anything that relates to her and us.

Unless…

“Ouch!” I yelped, holding my forehead as a flash occurred before my eyes. “God, that hurts!”

Onew noticed me as he sat up straight. “Taemin, are you alright?”

“No, I don’t think—” I paused as I recalled that one memory I tried so hard to bring up. My eyes widened as I remembered the night where I told her.

I told her. About my childhood. About my liking for her. About us.

Moreover, I told her everything.

…

Okay… now I am officially in deeeeeeeep .

…

At least it was not up to our plan, I thought with a mental smack on the forehead. Stupid me.

“Uh…” I trailed off, my voice growing quiet as I glanced at my band members. “I think you may hate me for this.”

Key furrowed his eyebrows at me. “Hate you for what? The fact that you’re wearing my concealer that you stole from my room?”

“…That too, but that’s not the point!” I let out a sigh as I sat up from the chair, my back facing the mirror. I stepped closer towards the group as I avoided eye contact. “You know when I was—how do you say this?—drunk at Mi-ja’s house after Christmas?”

They all nodded, remembering the time when they all scolded me right after I entered the dormitory with my manager.

I fidgeted with my fingers. “I… may have… accidentally told her about us knowing her… my childhood included.”

…

A series of groans emerged from them as Jonghyun fell back onto the bed. “Way to spoil it for her, Lee Taemin. Now she’s really getting skeptical of us,” he grumbled.

“I’m so sorry, it wasn’t intentional! She must have taken advantage by listening onto me while I was rambling on like an idiot. God, if only I wasn’t so wasted…” I muttered out the last part to myself.

Onew smiled warmly at me. “It wasn’t your fault. You did not expect this outcome. Just do not drink past your limit again; you have blown enough cover as it is.”

“What are we going to do now?” I questioned him with raised eyebrows.

The leader stood quiet, our eyes focused on him as he began to think. Then he sighed. “We’ll wait. If she is that eager to know secrets, then we will allow her. Besides,” he paused for a second, a smirk on his face. “We all know that our little Mi-ja hates having secrets being kept from her.”

Jonghyun snorted. “Yeah, I remember. That snoopy little brat,” he chuckled, as if remembering the day he met her.

After a moment of silence, we all jumped at the knock on the door. We tensed up, staying quiet as if thinking it was Mi-ja who was at the door.

“Yah, if any of you are inside, would one of you care to come out and tell me why all of you are gathered in Onew’s room?”

We breathed out a sigh of relief, knowing that it was only Min from the other side of the door. “And please send Jonghyun out the room, there’s something I need to talk to him about.”

“Must be about that black eye she gave me,” he muttered under his breath, audible enough for us to hear as he got up from Onew’s bed, walking up to the door on which Key has moved away.

Minho snickered. “I warned you about that one too, but you never listened.”

“Shut it, Choi Minho,” he growled at Minho as he twisted the doorknob, exiting the room.

I felt like leaving the room as well, so with an excuse, I exited Onew’s bedroom long after Min and Jonghyun had left. I shook the eyes of Choi Minho closing the door behind as I left the room.

I stared at the music box in my hand, inspecting it from every corner and taking in every detail before putting it down on the desk, next to the pink envelope in my bedroom. I picked up the thin item, looking at it.

Maybe Mi-ja is right, I should open it before I regret it.

With shaking hands, I ripped it open, taking out the contents. It was a letter, or I think it was as it is in the form of a card. I took a read at it.

Dear Taemin,
How are you today? Knowing you, you must be nervous to open this letter.
You did not take long to read this, did you? I hope not. I will be upset to know
that you did.

Taemin snorted. He has already taken a year to read this simple letter.

Anyway, I have given this letter to you for a reason. I know, Taemin. I know that
you are still suffering over the heartbreak that I gave you years ago. However,
sometimes, later on in life, we realize that it is time to move on. I want you to move on.
I am not saying that you need to forget about us. I do not want you to forget the times
we had together nor the times we loved each other. I do not even want you to forget the
silly arguments we have over the stupidest things—even that made me laugh if
you look back on it.

He smiled, remembering the times when they fought over the simplest things. It was stupid, of course (who fights over cotton candy?) but it was funny as he looked back at them.

I do not want to see you suffer anymore. I want you to find a new girl who will
take care of you, who will stay with you and do the things I have not be able to do
with you. It may be hard at first, considering that you are too stubborn as a mule
to even let go of me, but you will get the hang of it.

This Mi-ja, she seems very nice. The way you look at her that day seems
like you like her. Not that I am complaining, I want to meet her as well!
Whilst I cannot say if she is the right person for you, I do hope that you
move on and is able to go into a new relationship. Do not forget about me,
as I was your first love, but do not linger on your last hope of us getting
back together. I am doing this for your own good, to help you with your
decisions in life. I know, forgetting it is hard, and I am sure you want
to keep on remembering it. I will not stop you from that.

Just remember that I will always be thinking of you.

            Love,
            Choi Jinri (Sulli). ××

I folded the letter quickly, just in time as the tears spilled over, running down my warm cheeks. I furiously wiped them away, annoyed with myself. I have been crying too much these days—and I say that I am the one who cries the least tears. Why am I crying so easily nowadays?

I guess sensitive topics about my life are what makes me cry easily.

I jolted a bit when I heard a knock on the door. I hastily hid the envelope into one of the drawers and wiped away any evidence of my tears before walking up to the door.

“Coming!” I called out to the other side of the door, my hand on the handle. I pulled it open, revealing that one person I was not ready to face yet.

“Taemin,” Mi-ja breathed out, her round eyes staring up at mine. I could not speak, not when she knows about us. I almost flinched when she touched my cheek, her thumb softly rubbing circles on my skin.

“Your eyes… they’re red,” she mumbled, her eyes full of fault. “Did I do this to you?”

I stood silent. I am still feeling remorseful for causing the first damage to her, so I suppose I could trick her with this one misunderstanding.

Mi-ja removed her hand from my cheek and let out a sigh, crossing her arms over her chest. She looked away for a moment, her vision averted to the ground below us before returning her attention onto me. “I’ll forgive you,” she told me.

My eyes widened at her answer, my cheeks red as a grin began to break through. “Really—”

“Under one condition.”

I pouted. Of course, there has be a condition. She is still upset, you know. There is no way she will forgive me that easily. “Sure,” I answered in a hoarse voice. “Anything.”

“Go on a date with me,” she replied, her eyes serious.

I blinked, taking in what she said before saying, “Oh.”

That is…that is easy! It will be a piece of cake, just like slicing an apple in half. That’s—! Pfft, this is—

My eyebrows furrowed as it slowly began to absorb into my brain. “Oh?” I questioned her, seeing her reddened cheeks and her eyes that kept glancing at the floor. She stepped a little closer to me, her eyes taking quiet glances at my face as she hastily held my hand, her fingers playing with the rosary ring on my index finger.

Wait a second. Did she just say I think she just said? No way… Holy , no way. She did not just ask me out.

My eyes went wide as it finally hit me. She seems to know that I understood it as her face grew red, biting her lower lip and now fully looking at the ground. I looked at my hand that was intertwined with hers before looking at her colored face.

“Yes, I did ask you out, you idiot. What do you say to that?” She grumbled, looking away with red ears. Her voice showed the truth that she’s really in her right mind on this. I stammered over my words, my cheeks and ears now beginning to grow rubicund.

Oh my God, she did ask me out on a date.

She asked me out on a date.

A date. W-We are going out.

Dating.

Holy .

“EH?”

Well, more secrets are coming out, aren't they? Now SHINee is in trouble because Mi-ja definitely thinks that they are up to something.

Oh well, nothing they can do about it because she is coming after them like a bull. This is what you get for keeping so much secrets from her.

And yes, you heard her right, she officially asked Lee Taemin to go out on a date with her in coniditon for making her feel mad. So Taemin better be doing good to make her happy or she'll kick him hard in the nuts. (￣^￣)

Now, I believe that Taemin must be really shocked about this. I mean, seriously.

I was looking at this in order to dislpay his shock on Mi-ja deliberately asking him out on a date:

And I#m pretty sure that this expression on his face matched the whole 'shock' thing perfectly.

I mean, Taemins is like: （・□・；）

And Mi-ja's like: \(///Σ///)\

And I'm pretty that summed everything up, no srsly. ＼（＠￣∇￣＠）／

Anyway, just because Mi-ja has officially picked Taemin to go out on a date, doesn't mean she's going to be together with him. There's a big difference between dating and being in a relationship. (And yes, I know that Minho actually went out with her, but that is counted as 'unofficial' since Mi-ja didn't really think of it as a date, sooo....)

...Who's ready for some SHINee & Other KPOP Marcos before I leave to work on my next update? Because I am!

Wow, you've just shot down Mi-ja, bro. And all the other fangirls LOLOL

You have to admit: Jaejjong was the ghei back then. ^^;;

Jonghyun, just accept the goddamn fact that you are short, Good Lord!

I have to ask, why are you all in the library in the first place if you're just going to be like this? LOL

Well, can't blame you for being short, dude...

And that's the end of it, really. I don't want to count how many macros I've put in here. I think the ratio between SHINee and Other Kpop is like 2:5. Or if I put into percentage, I say it's an estimate to about 10% of SHINee and 80% of others. LOL, what is wrong with me.

See you next update!

(And I'm on the 50th chapter! Wow, I'm really going for 100 or more, aren't I. .____.)