My eyes are stuck.

I can’t pry them off of Baekhyun’s and it’s even worse because he’s giving me this look of complete of apprehension. He’s waiting for me to say something but I can’t even form thoughts in my own head. I can only stare back and try to somehow piece the situation together, but my mind keeps replaying the words over and over again.

‘I think I’m in love with you.’

‘I’m in love with you.’

‘in love with you.’

‘in love.’

‘love.’

I open my mouth to speak, but there’s a knock on the door and I let my head snap in its direction—finally an excuse to pry my eyes off of Baekhyun. The door slowly creaks open before Baekhyun even has a chance to say “Come in.” …if he was even going to say ‘Come in’ in the first place.

Hyosung’s head pops into the office and with a hand over her eyes, probably assuming she would see me sprawled out on his desk, but it was exactly the opposite. I’m sitting as far back on the chair with my back strongly pressed against the back of the chair and my hands anxiously gripping onto the arm rests.

“Oh,” she says after peeking through her fingers and letting her hand fall to her side as she opens the door wider. “Um, your fiancé is downstairs,” she says, although it sounds more like a question.

“What?” I practically breathe out. I can see Baekhyun’s concerned stare in the corner of my eyes and I suddenly feel like the weight of the world has placed itself on my lungs. I could only think of the worst case scenario.

He’s never visited me at work before because there’s a very strict policy here about visiting employees and he honestly never has time to anyway.

Minkyung must have told him. Somehow she was able to find out who I was and find out I was with someone and she obviously needed to get her revenge so she told him.

Jongin knows I’ve been cheating on him and he didn’t even find out through me. 

I stand up and return my eyes to Baekhyun. He looks at me with guilty eyes and it’s almost like he knows what’s about to happen just as well as I do. I send him an uneasy smile to try and ease the situation. It doesn’t work, but I use it as more of a goodbye to him. I really didn’t know what was about to happen.  Jongin could be storming up flights of stairs ready to beat him to a pulp or he could be fuming downstairs in the lobby waiting to beat me to a pulp…

I can’t think straight at all. Baekhyun’s confession is still replaying in my head, but I can’t stop imagining Jongin’s face. I honestly don’t know if he’ll be furious or if he’ll be devastated. I really don’t think I have a preference.

I walk past my desk and I see Luhan and Jongdae glance up at me and quickly return their eyes to their screen. I know they know and it only makes the situation worse. Hyosung offers to go downstairs with me, but I insist that I must face this alone. How bad would it look to Jongin if I didn’t even face him alone?

I stand in the elevator lobby after pressing the down button and await my doom. There’s still a tremendous weight on my chest and I’m starting to find it hard to breathe. When the elevator doors finally open, I drag myself inside and I hear someone jog their way in before I turn around to face the doors.

I press the button next to the one and look to whoever is accompanying me on my way down and I want to vomit when my eyes meet Baekhyun’s. The doors are already closing and I have no choice but to spend an agonizing thirty seconds with the last person I really didn't need to see. And I still haven’t assessed the fact that said person is actually in love with me, but I could only jump one hurdle at a time.

“Let me take the blame,” he says and I roll my eyes at his chivalry. It was charming before, but now it’s just unnecessary.

“Baek, it’s fine. I saw this coming. It’s both our fault. There’s no reason for you to be the only one to suffer,” I say, keeping my eyes glued on the floor indicator in the elevator.

“What do you think he’s going to do?” The tone in his voice is genuinely remorseful; like he didn’t want Jongin to leave me, even if it meant that I could possibly end up with Baekhyun himself.

“I honestly have no idea,” I say, trying to swallow down a lump in my throat, but failing from doing so because of the dry cavern that is now my mouth. The elevator dings and my heart race picks up. There was no way I would ever be ready for the upcoming situation.

I walk out of the elevator and down the hall with whatever dignity I have left. I spot Jongin casually sitting in the waiting room with a leg propped up on the other while he stares at his phone. Possibly a text message from Minkyung that is about to ruin everything…

I can hear Baekhyun quietly trailing behind me against my request, but I don’t have it in me to tell him to stop following me.

Jongin hears my footsteps and his head snaps in my direction and springs up quickly. He’s going to kill me, I think. I take a deep breath as he finally is in front of me. I watch as his eyes glance behind me at Baekhyun, but I don’t see flames burning in his eyes, or actually any feeling burning in his eyes at all. He looks perfectly happy.

He pulls me into a hug and I hug him back cautiously, wondering what the heck was going on. I pull away and stare at him with confused eyes, and he’s still looking at me with a goofy smile on his face.

“Okay, so I know you told me I should never visit you at work, but I decided to be spontaneous, you know?” I try to control my facial expressions, but I really can’t help but gawk at him. “We’ve been so routine lately. I thought it was time for something new.”

He wasn't here to kill me? Or Baekhyun?

“Wait, what?” I manage to ask. I came downstairs expecting the absolute worst from Jongin, and here he is proposing a little rendezvous?

“I’m taking you out to lunch, stupid,” he says, playfully hitting me on the arm. “Uh, who’s he?”

My eyes widen and I quickly come up with a recovery. “He’s the guy I went to New York with. Um, the one that saved me from getting mugged? You said you wanted to meet him,” I reply, trying to sound as convincing as possible.

Baekhyun side eyes me and shakes Jongin’s hand. “Uh, yeah, I’m Baekhyun.”

I try not to look it, but I’m falling apart on the inside. These two were never supposed to meet each other. I’ve completely failed at trying to keep these two parts of my lives separate and I’ve only put myself even more at risk for the situation I was dreading. The two of them meeting only escalated the fight that was bound to happen.

“Oh, hey man, thanks for saving her, I really don’t know how to thank you,” Jongin says, shaking hid hand with both of his own and smiling at Baekhyun. I could practically see the guilt pouring out of Baekhyun’s eyes. “Maybe I should treat you to lunch as well.”

I try to keep my face as straight as possible, but on the inside I’m flailing around in panic. I could hardly handle this small meeting in front of me. How on earth would both Baekhyun and I be able to handle lunch?

“Oh, it’s okay,” Baekhyun says with a slight stutter. “I actually have lunch plans with my buddy, Chanyeol. Um, it’s the reason I’m down here in the first place. So, uh, I should really get going,” he says glancing at me, and I mentally thank him for avoiding what could have possibly been the most awkward experience of my life. “It was nice meeting you.” He smiles at Jongin and looks at me with wide eyes when Jongin’s not looking.

I somehow dodged a huge bullet, but I still feel like I’ve been shot in the chest.

UM KCON IS TOMORROW AND I CANT SLEEP SO HERE I AM WITH AN UPDATE HAHAHAHA. I FEEL SO UNPREPARED OH MY GOD. I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT IM WEARING. I JUST CANT. FNLWAEFBAERLJKFGDKLGDS. THE CONCERT'S NOT EVEN TOMORROW AND IM FREAKING OUT MAN. I EVEN HAVE THE CRAPPIEST TICKETS HAHAHA BUT I MEAN JUST SEEING EXO IN PERSON JUST SOUNDS LIKE A RLY BAD HEART ATTACK IDK

OK WELL ANYWAYS I MADE A TWITTER SO IF YOU WANT TO SEE (POSSIBLY RLY ANNOYING) KCON UPDATES THEN FEEL FREE TO FOLLOW :3 I'LL FOLLOW YOU BACK :)

http://twitter.com/rolling_baek