The greatest thing happened to me today. I’m so happy right now I could fly. Yes I know it’s kinda contradicting with what I wrote the last time >.<

It all started by Jessica asking me out on a date today.

She confessed to me! I think she did… but… I panicked >.< I didn’t reply to her and I felt like I hurt her feelings.

I was contemplating. I’m afraid I would hurt her in the future. What if… I’m not around anymore and as much as I would like to keep my promise of not leaving her alone… I’m afraid that my body won’t listen to me. If I could take up all the pain that she would feel in the future, I would. I end up changing the topic to our date.

It was fun and enjoyable. What I cherish most is the normality of the whole date. I thought Sica would treat me differently after she knew that I had this sickness but she didn’t. Although I did felt her concerning at small little things like how she would split the shopping bags among us which usually she would just let me handle it all and how she would walk in a slower pace even though when she got excited about some outfit she saw far away.

I felt cared and loved. Even though she never intends to burden me all the while during all these years but it’s just me wanting to spoil her. Some may say that I’m chivalrous especially towards Sica. It may be true but it’s just me liking her to rely on me. As if she needs me.

Back to the scenario, we went to the Ferris wheel. Yes. You remember don’t you? My plan to confess at the very top of the Ferris wheel. However I didn’t. It is not because it’s not how Jessica described her perfect scenario of being confessed to. You understand why I didn’t confess don’t you?

The burden is too big. Not for me but for her. I see no future in me.

How could I possibly let her know that I’ll love her forever when I barely could only control my own pulse?

That thought never left my mind. I decided to leave the decision to a higher power for a sign.

It happened. It snowed. The weather report this morning said that it wouldn’t snow today but it did. Right in front of Jessica’s door. All the pieces fall together perfectly and if I didn’t know, I might think that it has all been planned.

If Jessica didn’t found out…

If she didn’t ask me for a date today…

If my mom didn’t insist that we wear a scarf…

If I just have confessed at the Ferris wheel…

If I decided to listen to her to not send her back home earlier…

If she had gone in just a second earlier…

If the sky decided not to snow…

And if any of those didn’t fall into place…

The miracle wouldn’t have happened. It’s the exact scenario of what Sica described. It’s a sign.

I confessed exactly how she described it.

I never thought of the consequences anymore.

Turns out she loves me too!!!

It’s like a dream come true!!!

It still feels like a dream…

Hehe… I pinched myself… This is not a dream…

Woohoo!!!