Dear Diary-nim?,

This is the first time I’m writing one and I guess I took my brother’s suggestion. He told me to write down every unhappy thing and keep it there. Guess I’ll have to burden you from now on Diary-nim. *bows* Hehe.

Days ago I was training myself on the treadmill when suddenly I felt my heart ache. I stopped thinking I was just overexerting myself but turns out it happened more and more often when I'm exercising. It has never happened before. I told my mom about it and she took me to the hospital and the result came out. I was diagnosed with a term that I don’t even know what it means. The doctor explained that it’s a heart disease where my heart muscles would gradually become weak over time and I could die from heart failure. The doctor could only tell me roughly that cases like mine would live for another 10 years and if lived healthy and positively I could double it up. No surgeries could help and heart transplant is the only option.

I was so shocked. It was so surreal that I couldn’t react or believe what the doctor said. My mom looked worse. Apparently this sickness is hereditary and that’s what my uncle who stayed out of the city had. He passed away when I was in junior school. I only knew he died of heart failure but I didn’t understand why such a young man whom ate health would have heart attack. He died at the age of 22.

I couldn’t even cry. It’s not true. I don’t believe it. The doctor must be wrong. When the news broke to us, my mom hugged me and cried. I have never seen her cried that way in my life except that once at grandma’s funeral. I still didn’t cry. Like I said… I don’t believe it.

Am I going to die?