DONGHAE's POV

“I can see you’re not close with that monkey,” Kyuhyun asked as we walked towards our next class after lunch; English.

“I don’t really know him well since I didn’t grew up here so, yeah, we’re awkward and stuff and I don’t really like him. He’s such a jerk,” I added, feeling a bit annoyed just by talking about him. I heard my companion chuckle.

“That you’re right. But even though he’s like that, he’s quite popular here since he’s the head of the Dance Club, and also because of his girl friend,” he said.

“Oh?” I just answered, deep in thought. So that’s why he said he’s straight. Right, of course he has a girl friend. I rolled my eyes for even sparing a thought about him.

Everyone in the class was really nice to me, making me feel comfortable and asking me questions about my life and stuff. Both the guys and the girls accept my preference and they don’t find it disturbing hanging out with me. Everything is going well, if only a certain someone didn’t make their entrance.

“I see everyone accepts my cousin?” An irritable voice sounded as the chair beside Kyu moved and he slumped down. I ignored his presence, while the one’s talking to me just smiled at him.

“You’re cousin’s really cool, Eunhyuk,” Onew said.

“Yeah, Donghae’s really nice, too. You’re lucky to have a cousin like him,” Kai said, before turning to me and giving me a small smile.

“Right. He’s cool. Whatever. You guys are noisy,” he hissed, putting earphones in his ears and laid his head on the table.

“I sure am glad you’re not as moody as him, Donghae-ah,” Sunny whispered in my ear and I chuckled, before the teacher entered, putting the class in order.

“Mr. Lee Dong Hae?” The teacher called for me in English accent. And I smiled at him, standing up to do my introductions to the class, even if I know them already.

“I’m Lee Dong Hae, please take care of me,” I said as I smiled at my classmates who’s giving me thumbs up, and a smile.

“You’re from States, am I correct? If you don’t mind, would you do your introductions in English?” our teacher requested and I obliged, repeating what I said in english, and after that I sat down beside Kyu and classes started.

There wasn’t pretty much to study since I practically know the lessons by heart, I scanned the book we’re given and sure enough, I know them all, from the S-V agreement, to the compositions, and more, so I just sat in my chair, listening to the teacher babble in English, I don’t want to be rude and sleep off even if I know everything he’s teaching. On the other hand, the jerk had his head on his desk, earphones still on his ears, and eyes closed. I sighed; I guess he really is a bit if a bad guy image. Kyuhyun was taking down notes like a good student and I smiled at how his brows are almost meeting at the center for trying hard to understand the teacher talking in English.

“So, let’s have Donghae tell us his favorite book. Mr. Dong hae?” the teacher called out for me and I stood up, as the whole class looked towards me with an expectant face.

“Well, there are a lot of books that I love, since I love reading, I don’t really know what book I should choose,” I told the teacher honestly in english, as I gave him a shy smile.

Mr. Lee smiled at me, “But is there a particular book you liked? Or an author, perhaps?”

I started thinking at the books I’ve read, “Umm---I read the books written by Nicholas Sparks. Though I know most are romance, a lot of them talks about family and religion, so I like the author,” I answered and was given the permission to sit down.

“Nicholas Sparks?” Kyuhyun whispered to me and I nodded, before turning back to look at the teacher explaining the nature of reading.

Class ended after half an hour and Kyu lead me to our next period; Biology. I was excited, since it is my favorite subject, and Kyuhyun seemed to notice my giddy attitude that he started chuckling.

“What?” I looked at him, and he just ruffled my hair and smiled.

“Nothing. You looked like a cute kid when you’re excited like that,” he said and walked ahead of me.

This would’ve been the best class ever if there is no certain monkey sitting at the end of the room, reading a magazine with earphones on. Keeping my cool, I just entered the room with Kyuhyun, and as I walked towards an empty chair. Thankfully, the teacher entered so we took our seats and the lecture began.

“Excuse me, Mr. Lee Hyuk Jae, but if you are not interested in my subject, you are free to go,” the teacher said coldly as Hyuk Jae continued flipping the pages. As soon as his attention was called, he looked up and cocked a brow at the teacher, and smirked. I was expecting him to stand up and leave, but he looked at me, and winked, which confused the hell out of me.

“My bad, but I can’t leave, sir. I have to take a close watch at my wi---” he looked at me again, and I swear he’s going to say wife, so I glared at him, oh, if only looks could kill. “Wise cousin all alone when he just transferred,” he finished, and put down his magazine, and sat properly. “Satisfied?” he asked the teacher with his cocky tone, and the teacher just glared at him and resumed teaching. I couldn’t concentrate, though. I am literally pissed. What’s this jerk up to again? I didn’t even notice my hands curling into fists, if Kyuhyun didn’t reached to hold my trembling hands. I looked at my right, and saw his worried expression.

“Hey, are you okay?” He whispered. I took a deep breath, before smiling at him, relaxing my hands and gave him a small nod.

While the teacher continued teaching about the cell cycle, I let my thought wander. I can’t let Hyk jae ruin my life, just because he holds something that might cause a great turmoil, and just because he knows I am so kind, he’s taking advantage. I hate it when people takes advantage of me. There was a time when a boy confessed he liked me, but I don’t really have feelings for him, but being the kind human I was, I gave him a chance. We’re always together, always. But before I even start falling for him, Heechul spilled the beans and told me I was being used. Heechul told me that he investigated the boy, and he learned that he was ordered by a gang leader to make me fall for him; the gand leader hated my brother, since Chul is loved by everyone and all of them are afraid of him and respects him, something the leader can’t accept because it hurts his pride. So, to get back to Chul, he ordered a new member of their group to get close to me, and when I fall, he’ll reject me, all of that just to get Chul, because they know how my brother loves me. At first, I was shocked, but after learning the truth, I got upset, because I truly thought the boy is different, he looked so innocent, but I guess, looks really are deceiving. Remembering the past, I know I need to do something. Hyuk Jae and I will be living together whether we like it or not. Maybe I need to be understanding, and all. Maybe we can start being friends. I need to think this in a mature way, I need to be mature, for mine and his sake, I have to be.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*

“Let’s go,” Hyuk Jae called for me at the end of class, as I was chatting with Kyuhyun since he told me he’d tour me around school tomorrow. I looked up and saw his impatient face, I sighed and grabbed my bag. I need to take this the kind way, right?

“I’ll be going, Kyuhyun-ah. See you tomorrow,” I smiled at him, and followed the monkey as he’s already outside the door.

The drive home was quiet, since we don’t have anything to talk about. Should I open it up now?

“Umm---” I started, but there was no response.

“Hyuk Jae,” I tried again, but the car was stopped all of a sudden, and I realized we’re already outside the house. I looked at the driver’s seat, and he’s glaring, not at me, he’s glaring forward, hands gripping the steering wheel tightly.

“Hey, are you okay?” I asked, worried of what’s happening to me.

“What the hell is your problem, dude?!” He shouted at me, and I flinched at my seat, suddenly scared at his sudden outburst.

“W—why?”

“You even have the guts to ask why?! You admit you’re gay, the whole school knows we’re related, and you’re sticking like glue to MY friend!” he continued shouting, and he looked at me, and it seems like he wanted to kill me with his eyes.

“Do you know people are saying behind my back?! They doubt if I really am straight, or if I’m a homo like you! Like, what the hell?! I have a girl friend and even she asked me if I am gay or not! Do you know how pissed I am right now?! Why do I even have to be stuck to someone like you?! It’s just the first day and you’re already making my life hell?! Maybe it’d be better if it was not you I was arranged to be married with! Anyone’s better, as long as they’re not you! Or better yet, why don’t you just go and die so I can be free from that stupid pact!” He finished.

I stared at his angry eyes, speechless. I really have no words for him. I feel---I feel like---I don’t even know what I’m feeling right now. Anger? It would’ve been rational if I actually feel anger right now. But I don’t. I don’t feel angry towards him, and as odd as it may sound, I can’t find it in myself to actually be mad at his words. Pain? Sadness? Maybe? Yes? I don’t know. Why am I feeling like this? Why do my heart ache? Why am I hurt? Because of his words? Because of his accusations? Or because it was him who said it? Which is it?

I felt something wet drop in my hands, I looked at it, and brought a hand to my face, only to realize that I’m actually crying. When did the tears start to flow? I didn’t even felt my eyes watering. I chuckled to myself, as I tried to wipe the tears. But as soon as I erase them, new ones start to form and they don’t seem to stop, it’s starting to annoy me. Why the hell am I crying?!

“Sorry, give me a moment,” I told him and my voice cracked, but I did not dare to look at him, I can’t look at the hatred in his eyes, so I just continued to wipe my eyes with my hands, but to no avail. I’m starting to hiccup from crying too much. Damn it, I feel like a kid, again. The last time I cried this hard was when my gold fish got eaten by Heechul’s cat, but Heechul was there to comfort me, but now, he’s not here. I have no one beside me right now. No one’s here to comfort me. Thinking of how alone I am made me cry more, made the tears flow faster. So I stopped attempting to dry the tears and just let them flow. But I can’t stay here. I feel like I’ll be suffocated, by my tears and by his anger towards me. I need to get out. Before I open the door, I manage to gather the courage to look at him in the eyes, and I saw that he’s staring at me. His eyes no longer painted with anger, but with regret and sadness. But I stood my ground, I am just hallucinating.

“I’m sorry if I’m making you suffer. Sorry, HyukJae, I really am. But you know, I actually am thinking of starting over,” I said, as he looked at me, “and to think I wanted us to be, at least, friends.” And with that I went out of the car, and ran into my room, locked it and flopped myself to my bed, where I allow the pillow to absorb my tears, and without knowing, I fell asleep with tears still visible in the corner of my eyes.

_____________________________________________________

Sorry if it's lame. :(

Lovelots <3