Hae held on tight.

Hyuk was panting on top of him, they were still connected.

Hae started to slowly rub up and down Hyuk's back.

'Stop arousing me.' Hyuk grunted and pulled back. He got up and avoided eye contact.

'W-What are you doing?' Hae asked, fear already crawled in his voice.

'Dressing myself.'

'Why?'

'Our agreement, one ....or two and that is it.' Hyuk forced himself to say.

Hae automatically lifted his hand to his chest as it hurt.

Hyuk zipped up his pants and turned around.

Hae grabbed his wrist 'Don't'.

Hyuk froze.

'Please don't.' Hae repeated.

'Let go.' Hyuk said.

'I-I can't.'

'Donghae, you knew the terms.'

'But I love you.' Hae whispered.

Hyuk closed his eyes but refused to turn to the boy. 'You are too young to know of love, what we shared was pure lust.'

Hae let go of the wrist and jumped up to stand in front of Hyuk. 'What? Lust? How dare you violate what we just shared!' He shouted.

'I'm your ex bodyguard and what we shared was another night of hot .'

Hae slapped him with all his might and then started crying.

Hyuk forced himself to not react to it.

'I guess you don't feel the same for me.' Hae mumbled.

Hyuk didn't respond, he couldn't. He grabbed his coat and went to the door. 'Take care, Hae.'

Hae felt his heart break as he saw him disappear.

Days went by slowly. Hae couldn't tell them apart. He spent them doing nothing but mourn. He couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, cared for nothing. Everything was a daze. He didn't realise how many times his appa, Yeye, Kyu or Siwon came over to check on him. A doctor was called several times and he was fed through an IV.

'Doctor, what is going on?' Mr. Lee asked desperately.

'Your son...seems to have lost the will to live.' the doctor said gently.

Mr. Lee started crying. Siwon hugged him as he fought back the tears as well.

'Has anything drastic happened to your son lately?' The doctor inquired.

'He was kidnapped, tortured, almost and the man he loved took off.' Kyu summarized.

'I guess this Hyukkie he keeps calling for is his ex lover?'

'Yea.' Siwon said.

The doctor sighed. 'I'll give him something to sleep.'

In the meantime Kyu searched for Hyuk desperately, convinced that the man was the only cure.

'Kyuhyun?' Sungmin said surprised.

'The one and only, how are you, jerk?'

'Why are you here?'

Kyu looked down.

'Don't tell me, trouble in paradise?' Sungmin smirked.

Kyu looked up with a sad expression. 'I'm sorry.' He said.

That blew Sungmin away. 'Why would you be?'

'It must be hard to hate a brother so much.' Kyu explained.

Sungmin flinched.

'Let me tell you something that will lighten your mood.' Kyu continued. 'Hae is a complete mess after Hyukjae disappeared. We are actually afraid he might die since he's slipping away from us more and more with each day passing.'

Sungmin frowned. 'That idiot.'

'Hmmm?' Kyu said.

'Hyukjae is a damn fool.'

'I agree.' Kyu smiled weakly. 'But Hae loves that fool more than live itself it seems.'

'Hyuk loves Hae too.'

'I know.'

'Deeply, from the beginning actually.' Sungmin said.

'Make me understand what is going on.' Kyu asked softly.

'He thinks everything that happened to Donghae is his fault and he can't forgive himself.'

'So he punishes them both, really what a retard. Where could he be hiding?'

'Don't worry, Hyuk will throw himself into working. Since he is the best in the field, just check out all the rich and famous, you'll find him in the shadow there.'

Kyu got up. 'Thanks, Sungmin.'

Sungmin looked away.

'By the way, it's good to see a part of you couldn't let go of Hyuk as well.' Kyu said softly and walked away leaving Sungmin in shock.

'So from tomorrow on, I'll be your bodyguard.' Hyuk shook the famous politician's hand.

'I'm glad we could persuade you, Mr. Lee.' The politician, Mr. Jung smiled predatory.

Hyuk felt that this was far from a pure soul and that was good. He couldn't afford to be around something that was remotely good or pure. He couldn't face anything that would remind him of Donghae.

'You are a tough negotiator though, Mr. Lee.' Jung said. 'You really have no heart, asking such a high fee.' he whined.

I lost my heart. Who needs one anyway? Let it beat alone, let it linger, let it pine after the one that isn't in my reach. Let it die, I don't care, I've lost it a long time ago to a smiling angel.