“They’re here!” Henry repeated as if his previous words aren’t enough to wake me up from my slumber. “Come on!” he tugged on the blanket that covers me.

                I sat up and pinched my own cheeks, just to check if this is a part of my dream or not. “It hurts!” I screamed and then I heard  Henry giggle at my side.

                “You’re not dreaming, pabo.” He laughed more. “Need some help in pinching your cheeks?” he offered but I stuck out my tongue on him.

                I threw the blankets off me and ran to the bathroom. I quickly dressed myself up and nodded on contentment as I saw my reflection on the mirror. Then, I ran out of the room and found Henry still there, sitting on the bed.

                “Done already?” he asked and I nodded. “That’s fast.” He beamed at me and I twirled around in front of him.

                “So, do I look okay?” I asked him, giving out my best smile ever.

                He didn’t say anything but I could see him suppress his laughter. I grunted but ended up laughing with him anyway.

                “Let’s go!” he invited as he pulled my hand. “Oh, yeah. They don’t know anything about you being here.” He turned to face me and he put his index finger over his lips. “It’s a surprise.” He smiled again and I smiled at him as we made our way down the stair quietly.

                “Wait for my signal.” He mouthed when we reached the edge of the stairs. I nodded.

                “Hyung!” I heard him shout as he left me there. I heard the silent chatters went dead silent as Henry announced his return.

                “Yah! What’s up now?” I heard someone ask in a pretend-irritated voice. I forced myself not to giggle.

                “Nothing!” I heard Henry’s voice reign again. “Annyeong, Hee-chul hyung! Dong-hae hyung! Sung-min hyung! Shin-dong hyung! Ye-sung hyung! Ryeo-wook! Kyu-hyun!”

                I heard a loud smack sound followed by the cry of pain by Henry and laughed as I imagined who did it to him. Hee-chul oppa, I guess.

                “Seriously, Henry, why do you need to state each of our names?” I heard the baritone voice of Ye-sung echo in the room.

                “I’m just having an attendance check.” He replied and I giggled again thinking that it’s his way of informing me who came. “Where’s Lee-teuk and Eun-hyuk hyung?”

                “They have their radio show, remember?” Shin-dong, I guess, answered.

                “Oh, well.” Henry let out a loud sigh. “Then they’ll be missing the fun.”

                “What’s fun anyway?” Dong-hae’s voice sounds rough from here.

                “Well, you see, I have a very special visitor.” Henry announced. So I guess my cue’s coming next now, right?

                “A fan visitor?” Hee-chul asked excitedly. “Bring her on! The fan service Queen is here!” he laughed his Hee-sica laugh and I bit my hand just to avoid laughing too.

                “Sorry, hyung, but she’s not your fan.” Henry replied and I heard another smack and scream of pain coming from him again. Still biting my hand, I held onto the railing of the stairs for support. This funny convo is not helping me hide in here.

                “That really hurts hyung!” Henry exclaimed then I heard everyone of them laugh, or so I guess. I wonder why Kyu-hyun isn’t talking. Is he busy or pre-occupied or something?

                “So where’s your visitor?” Dong-hae asked. I’m so excited to come out there and say hi to them again but that would ruin the ‘fun’ Henry’s thinking.

                “I changed my mind. I won’t show her to you guys.” Henry sighed. If I wasn’t thankful to him because of his good deeds, I would’ve went out there and hit him too.

                “Then don’t. I don’t care about your fan anyway.” At last, I heard Kyu-hyun’s voice now. But why is his tone like that? It’s like he’s annoyed just by being called here? I wonder if he’ll have the same reaction later if he’d know that it’s me Henry’s talking about.

                “She’s not my fan either.” Henry reasoned and at that moment, I want to tell him he’s wrong but I know I’d be lying to myself if I do so. “She’s your fan.” He continued.

                I gasped and blushed at his words. How can he just tell Kyu-hyun that I’m his fan? That’s true but still, that would give us away! It’s supposed to be a surprise, remember?

                “I don’t need another fan.” Kyu-hyun stated lowly and I slumped on the staircase as I his words pierced right through me.

                He doesn’t need another fan. He doesn’t need me. Why would he say that? Doesn’t he know how much I treasured those times we’re together even though it all ended up badly? Doesn’t he know that I missed him so much? Doesn’t he know that he’s the reason why I agreed to go back here at Seoul and leave my mom alone at Pusan?

                Of course he doesn’t. He doesn’t know a thing.

~ Kyu-hyun’s P.O.V. ~

                This conversation is going nowhere. I shouldn’t have come anyway if only Sung-min hyung didn’t force me too. I could’ve been winning my hundredth game on my laptop alone at the dorm. I might’ve been able to think about everything that has happened for the past days. I may have been able to think of a way to make it up to Min-ji.

                “I changed my mind. I won’t show her to you guys.” I heard Henry sigh after a few moments. I lost track of their conversation since I’m obviously spacing out. What are they talking about? Oh, right. Henry’s visitor. A fan.

                “Then don’t. I don’t care about your fan anyway.” I suddenly blurted out. I almost regretted it after I said it since all of their eyes are now all focused on me. I’m just not in the mood, why can’t they feel that? I gulped on my juice and tried to divert my attention on something else; anything else except their eyes and stares.

                “She’s not my fan either.” Henry replied. “She’s your fan.”

                My eyes widen at his words. My fan?  I’m supposed to be thankful and excited to meet this person who idolizes me but why do I feel so scared? Min-ji. My mind shouted and then my heart suddenly throbbed in anticipation. But why would she be here at Henry’s house? Most importantly, I should be worried if she is because I don’t know what harm I could inflict on her next. What if I’d hurt her again? What if she gets hurt again? I can’t forgive myself anymore after what happened. She’s almost considered as a criminal for being in a picture with me if only our company didn’t resolve the case promptly. I can’t risk her safety anymore. She’s my fan; I need to take care of her.

                Wait a minute. Henry didn’t even say anything about Min-ji, why am I assuming things? She’s not here. That’s impossible.

                “I don’t need another fan.” I said loud enough for them to hear. I don’t need another fan being hurt because of me.

                “Kyu-hyun-ah.” Sung-min approached me and squeezed my shoulder. I nodded to him to tell him I’m fine but when I faced him, his expression turned to horror. I stared at him more and wondered why, and then he reached out to my face and wiped something off it.

                I’m crying, again?

                Why am I crying on little things these past few days? I hate being like this, especially in front of them. I hate being vulnerable; I hate being pitied upon. I hate being weak!

                I snapped his hand off my face and turned my back on them. The room is so quiet now, it scares me more. I wiped the last teardrops on my face and head off to the kitchen. I can feel their eyes on me again; leaving me all burdened for making them worry about me.

                Then the faintest sobbing sound came from nowhere as I’m making my turn toward the kitchen. I glanced at my back but all I saw is the deserted stairs there. I looked back at the other members at the lounge but I heard their low voices in another conversation; maybe about my sudden burst-out. I’m about to ignore the sound when another sob came out. Now I’m sure it came from the stairs. Is Henry’s house haunted or what? I cautiously approached the stairs as another sniffling sound came from behind it. I poked my head at the side and saw an outline of a person sitting on the steps of the stair.

                I came closer to the figure when the stairs suddenly produced that squeaking sound which you commonly hear from horror movies. The figure lifts its head upward and my eyes met the face that haunts me these past few days. I rubbed my eyes to erase the hallucination it’s creating but when I opened it again, it’s still there; she’s still there.

                “Kyu-hyun oppa.” She murmured and I flinched back and fell on my knees in front of her as I heard her voice speak my name again.

                The shock I felt was nothing compared to the happiness I felt when she spoke my name; when she called me. I was overwhelmed by that unexplainable feeling that all I could do is to reach out for her shoulder and confirm that she’s really there in front of me.

                “Kyu-hyun-ah.” She said again, calling me with that mad tone of hers I liked the most. Something glistened on her face but I have no courage to hold her that close yet.

                I don’t know what to do next. I don’t know if I should do what I’m best at. I don’t even know what I’m feeling right now. All I know is that I’ve missed this person in front of me so much that I can barely think of anything coherent. She’s the only fan I needed; nothing else matters.

                I smiled at her as I squeeze her shoulder.

               “Min-ji.”

sorry if it took too long for me to update.. anyway, thanks for bearing with me!!!

♦rhei_07♦