AN: Well..here is the first chapter..I really hope it's not THAT bad.. This chap has a bit of angst, but this will get better, I promise x33

The 'stranger' 

 Key was sitting in his room, staring at the little leather diary he had just bought. He didn't know why, but when he'd seen it in the bookshop, he knew he had to buy it. So now as he sat there, he sighed softly. Somehow the book reminded him of his crush-the puppy –slash dino looking Jonghyun. Mabye because his eyes was the same colour of the diary? Key didn't know. But he knew that this was killing him-not being able to sonfess about his feelings made him stress even more. It was true that he was deadly afraid though. His doctor had told him that even though his condition had been improving, he could still collapse in any moment. But Key still went to school, he didn't want to spend his remaining life in a hospital room, waiting for death. So he opened his diary, and started writing... 

Dear Diary,

I don't know what to do anymore. Every day, I see him at school. With his large puppy-eyes and breathtaking smile. I wish I could just walk up to him and.. say hi. Or anything. I wish I could, but who am I? Just a sick boy.. 

As he finished writing, tears gathered in his eyes. He never knew why, but thinking about him-Kim Jonghyun, had always made Key cry. He was aware of the fact that Jonghyun used to have a crush on him, but he doubted that he still did. It was all before Key knew that he could die, before his appa died in the same sickness Key had. That was the day when Key wanted to tell Jonghyun that he liked him, they were still young, and he didn't know that it was 'wrong'. He couldn't have been older than 7-year-old, meaning that it was ten years ago. 

Flashback~

Key and Jonghyun were in a park, surrounded by blooming flowers. Like always, they were holding hands. Key turned to Jonghyun, opening his moth to say something. Suddenly a painful cry was heard as Key's umma ran towards them. Her eyes were full of tears. 'Key come quickly.' she sobbed. 'Your appa isn't well!' she cried. At that moment, Key knew that he wasn't going to see his appa again. He started crying, and ran with his mother. At the hospital, they weren't allowed into the room of his appa. They told them that they had to wait. Key wanted to go inside and say goodbye, he knew what would happen. After an hour of waiting, a doctor walked out, his head down. 'I'm sorry..' he said. 'e have never seen an illness like this before..' and at that moment, Key knew that his appa was dead. He broke down. He clung to his mother for dear life, but she was like him. Sobbing and breaking down.

Flashback's end

Key was crying again as he remembered that day, ten years ago.He still spoke to Jonghyun for some time, but not so long.  Because a week after his appa's death, he fell sick, just like his father. And the symptoms were the same. The doctors couldn't do anything. Key wouldn't talk to anyone, only to the teachers, when he was asked a question, and his mother. No one knew that he was sick. After some time, Jonghyun gave up trying to talk to Key. He was sad, but couldn't do anything. 

 Key was snapped out of hi thoughts as suddenly a few messy lines appeared in his diary. His eyes widened. 'This is impossible.' he thought, but read the writing anyways.

I might not know how you feel exactly, but can tell you that what you're doing isn't right.  

 Key glared at the words. How could this stranger know what was right. If Key told Jonghyun about his feeling, maybe they would became a couple, yes. But he was sick and even though he was improving, he knew that he didn't have much time left. Every day he woke up in pain. His whole body would ache and the ache wouldn't go away, even after taking painkiller. He was sickly pale and he had lost his appetite a long ago. He was happy if he could eat an apple for breakfast and not throw it up right after. Maybe the girls at school were jealous of his perfect figure, but he knew that he was losing weight too fast.

How could you know?  

He wrote angrily.  He had enough of people-his mother, his doctor, the nurses- trying to tell him that tehy knew how he felt and he had to open up to people. But he refused to. No one could tell Key what to do. 

Because if you don't confess, you'll suffer. Even if your crush doesn't like you back, you have to tell him so you could go on. 

Key sighed and didn't write back. Even though what the stranger wrote was right, he wouldn't admit it. He wanted to end the suffering, but what if they got together? What would Jonghyun do after Key died? Key didn’t know, and he didn’t want to find out. He was scared of death, but every day he would go to bed thinking that he might not wake up. And when he did wake up, he’d cry, wishing his appa was still there. Wishing that he was Ok.

 Closing the book, he put it away and lay down on his fluffy, plain white bed. His room itself looked like a hospital room. A little part of Key wanted to decorate it with many shiny-and colourful stuff, but he just wouldn’t do it. Colourful things didn’t suit death.. Before he fell asleep, he grabbed his stuffed puppy (that looked strangely like Jongyhun) and hugged it tightly, wishing this nightmare would end.