Ha Neul’s POV

…

…he kissed me…

…

…Kim Jonghyun and I kissed…

…French kissed…

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*gulp*

…

KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~!!!!!

…

Wait…

Why am I so happy about that?? I sound like one of his crazy fangirls…!

Besides, why on earth did he kiss me???

Did he confuse me with one of his women or something?! That bastard!!! How dare he!!

Arrrghhhh!!! My first kiss!!! (First real kiss anyway…) Why?! Why did I have to lose my first kiss to that playboy?!! Aaaaa, give it backkkk!!! *cries*

Why? Didn’t you like it?

What?

You enjoyed the kiss, so why give it back?

Yah! Who’s talking such crap here!?

I usually go by the name ‘subconscious’…

Pft! What? Subconscious? Hahaha, you’ve got to be kidding me! And why would my subconscious say that I liked the kiss??

Because it’s the truth?

Yeah, right…

Then why did you kiss him back?

…

Err… that… I… I kissed him back?

Oh, come one! That’s the best excuse you could come up with?

Fine! I kissed him back! But it wasn’t because I liked it!

Oh? But because?

Because… Because…

Because you liked it.

NOO!!!

Then why?

…

Hmm?

…

So, it’s because y—

Fine-fine! It’s because I liked it!! Happy?!

Sure.

So, now, what’s the point of making me realise this?

I just wanted to make you see the truth.

Why thank you! I’m soooo happy that I now know that I liked that dino kissing me…!! I’m sure I’ll sleep a looooot better now…!!!

…

So, isn’t there anything else I should know? Like whether I already know the subject matter of the next exam or not? Subconsciously, you know?

…

What, now you’re not talking anymore?

…

Fine. Then just keep quiet…!

…

*Sighhh* Gorgeous… So, I liked the kiss, huh… So? Probably, the whole female Korean population would have LOVED it!! Then, why couldn’t I? Exactly! It’s perfectly normal to have liked that kiss! Yep-yep, that’s it. Nothing special happened. Therefore I shall continue to behave like I always have.

“Yosh!” I pumped my fist and jumped up from the couch I had slumped onto when Jonghyun had disappeared into his room. I went through the bath and when I came out again my eyes fell on the bottle that still stood on the table in the living room.

God, how could I have been so stupid to refill the bottle with WATER?! I should have just thrown it away praying that he would forget about it! But somehow I was also glad that he had found out tonight. Because then my mind had been too busy thinking of a way to deal with the situation to recall the kiss from the afternoon…

Because, in fact, my subconscious had been right… More than right…

I had loved it.

Whenever I remembered it, I felt tingly all over again and my heartbeat would pick up. Without realising, I had raised my fingers to my lips and touched them. I could still feel his lips on mine… My body remembered it perfectly…

AAARRRGGGHHHHH!!!!

Stop it! Stop thinking about it!! Nothing special happened! Nothing. Nothing. Nothing!

I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, thought of rainbows and ponies, and pushed down the handle of the door. I lay down on the bed and wrapped my arms around my teddy bear.

Only, when I felt the chest of my teddy bear rising and falling as if it was truly breathing, it finally dawned to me that once again, habit had led me into disaster.

This was not the guest room… and my teddy bear was with my family in Busan…

I slowly opened my eyes…

…and gulped.

There they were… The big, red, kissable lips that felt insanely soft to the touch… as I knew…

I was hugging my ‘teddy bear’s back and he had his head turned around to me.

Oh, God…! So much for my resolve to act as if nothing happened…

I couldn’t do it… It was impossible… With his face so near to mine that I could feel his breath? No way. With my skin burning hot like fire at the places where we touched? Not a chance. With him looking so damn gorgeous by simply sleeping? Not in a million years.

Suddenly and to my utter surprise, Jonghyun turned around in my arms and he wrapped HIS arms around my waist!!!

“Caught you…” He mumbled and I froze. He was awake??!!! My stomach did a backflip and my heart started beating like crazy.

However, when he didn’t open his eyes nor said anything else I concluded relieved that he must be sleep talking. I broke out of his embrace and stood up.

But there was no way I could sleep in this room tonight so I quietly made my way to the door. I had almost reached it when I heard the rustling sound of bedcovers being moved. I swallowed and turned around again, expecting him to have woken up.

Instead, I found him twisting and turning around on the bed… Another nightmare…

Now, I fought with myself. Should I leave him to himself just for this one night? Because I seriously felt that sleeping here tonight wasn’t the best idea. Or should I ignore this feeling and help him calm down?

My thoughts got interrupted when I heard him groan and upon looking up, I saw the pained expression on his face. I felt a pang in my chest and winced. Now, every hesitation was gone; all I could think of was how to make his nightmare disappear.

I rushed over to the bed again and gently grabbed his ankle. He was lying in a weirdly cricked position that surely was anything but comfortable. I straightened his leg and was just about to rearrange his arm too, when he suddenly sat up, wrapped his arms around me once more and pulled me against his chest!

I then heard him mumble something again, but this time I couldn’t understand it. And before I could do anything, he let himself fall back on the bed, taking me with him!! So, now I was lying on top of him with his arms firmly wrapped around me, not letting me move even an inch!

God, what was wrong with today? First my ‘confession’ during the interview. Then the kiss! And now this?! I don’t think my heart will be able to take much more of such happenings…

Right now, it was beating so fast, I thought it was going to take off any second! I surely would have died from a heart attack were it not for the soothing scent that I knew all too well slowly seeping into my system. (I still hadn’t sued that shampoo company…!)

I give up. This man is a mystery to me. How the hell can he change my mood like that in just a matter of seconds? First, he sends my heart racing with nervousness and anticipation and now I’m so calm I could fall asleep any moment!

Someone please explain this to me…

Oh well… I might as well use this chance and sleep… God knows what will be next…!

---------

Something was wrong with Jonghyun.

Although he still let me sleep beside him (after the nightmare I just couldn’t bring myself to sleep in the guest room…), but as soon as he thought I was asleep, he got up again. One night, when he again didn't come back even after two hours, I got curious and went to look for him. I immediately found him, sitting on the couch and doing something on his laptop! At about three in the morning!

I knew he had difficulties with sleeping but I thought we had solved that somehow...

But what worried me even more was that AFTER working on his laptop (until almost five am!) he went to sleep right on the couch...! Didn't he want to sleep in the same bed as I anymore? Then why didn't he say so? I could just go back to the guest room…

But no, he didn’t say anything and that just became his new everyday (or rather every night) routine...!

Another thing was that he stopped eating regularly. Even though he still cooked for me!! And when I once said that he really didn't need to cook for me when he himself wasn't even eating, he turned away and mumbled monotonously that he couldn't possibly let me ruin his kitchen...

That was, by the way, the way we talked now too; if we ever exchanged some words at all... He would turn his back to me and end the conversation at the first opportunity. In fact, he stopped looking at me altogether...

I understood that he felt troubled after what happened at the amusement park and wanted to avoid me. (I mean I was doing the same…) But wasn’t he being a bit extreme? To even change his eating habits and all? Couldn’t we just agree to forget about it and treat it as if it never happened? Like some sort of accident?

But even more puzzling was that he still drove me to university and cooked for me...! Why make an exception for these? I just didn’t get it.

Therefore, I decided to ignore my kitchen-ban for one evening. I needed a reason to talk to him. Besides, he needed a break and if he wasn't going to grant himself one, then I simply would have to make him. And thinking of his unhealthy meal schedule lately, I figured that a warm dinner would be the best. But as I am not unaware of my lacking cooking skills, I decided that ramyun would have to suffice. Although he wasn't a fan of instant food, but it was still better than the snacks he had been living on lately...

---------

It was almost six in the evening and I was actually faring quite well (there hadn’t been any major blunders up to now), when suddenly someone barged into the kitchen and almost made me drop the bowl because of the surprise.

"Yahhhh!!! What are you doing?!!! You're banned from the kitchen, don't you remember?!!!" Jonghyun yelled and frantically looked around the kitchen, probably looking for destroyed equipment. Eventually, his eye focused on the simmering ramyun. "And what the hell is THAT doing in my kitchen?!"

Well, at least he was talking to me again... somehow... Furthermore, I had been prepared for his ranting. And I wasn't going to back down so easily. Not this time.

"Stop yelling, I know I'm not supposed to be in here and that I'm also not supposed to bring instant food into your sacred kitchen, but ramyun is the only warm food I can make without challenging my goddess of luck and you really need to eat something warm!"

I literally saw his mind reeling for a second as he processed what I had just said. Was me trying to cook for him something this absurd?

"You-you expect me to eat... THAT?" He then questioned and looked at the bowl with utmost scepticism.

"Well, it's at least better than what you have been eating the past few days...!" I countered. "Besides, it might not even be as bad as you think it is..."

But he shuddered and shook his head. "No way... No way am I going to eat that!"

"I'm going to bother you until you agree to eat something real…!" I warned him; I needed to make my intentions clear or he would never comply. "I've set my mind to it, just so you know!"

That made him hesitate. He glanced at my ramyun again and finally seemed to make a decision. "Fine... But I still won't eat this..." He grumbled, nodding his head at the bowl. "There aren't even any fruit...!"

"Ah right! Fruit!" Why hadn't I thought of that earlier?! I walked over to the fruit bowl but she was empty. "We're out of fruit though..." I thus informed him meekly and he sighed. "Aish, you're helpless...! Fine, let's go...!"

Huh? Go? Where??

-----------------------------

I'm backkkkk!!! :DDDD

Though, now I've got to learn for my (ten!!! *faints*) exams... TT.TT but I still intent to continue updating! After all, I can't just learn, learn, learn for nine weeks straight...! --_--

Gosh, I've gotten so many comments!! *giddy grin* I so love you guys!! Thanks so much for all your kind words!! (I know I'm repeating myself but I just can't say it often enough... >.<)

Oh, and I'm working on drafting two new fics... ^.^ One starring Key and the other Minho... I'm debating on wheter I should already upload the forewords and descriptions just to see the reactions or not... Though, I will not start writing them unitl I have finished one of my current stories. Because then updates for each story would become even less often and I wouldn't want that. :) Hmmm... Are you guys curious? XDD