As soon as the words left her lips, she regretted it. 

Say no.. Say no... Kyungsoo-ah.

"Okay."

_____________

Kyungsoo helped her carry the bear into the living room.

"Where shall I put this?"

"Just.. anywhere will do." Ume placed her laptop and bag down and walked into the small kitchen.

"Coke? Juice? Plain water?"

"Just plain water, thanks..." Kyungsoo's eyes scanned the house, small but cosy. White walls with sensible looking art pieces, all things neatly put into it's place. The magenta sofa stood out in the otherwise colourless living room. 

"Sorry I've got nothing much in the house..."

"Ah.. It's fine... who's this?"

Kyungsoo pointed at the picture frame of her family photo.

"My parents, and my brother. My brother is staying in Hongkong with his wife, and my parents... they passed away in an accident several years back."

"Ah... sorry.."

"It's okay, that was so long ago." Ume placed the cups on the tea table and sat down on the sofa.

"You live alone?" Kyungsoo moved to sit down next to her.

"It's that obvious? Haha... Yes. For a long time now. But I'm used to it."

Kyungsoo peered at her.

That look again.

Ume tried to chase away her unsettledness inside. 

This was such a bad idea.

Ume's restlessness made Kyungsoo bite his lower lips in nervousness. 

This is not good. Why had I said yes?

"Kyungsoo-ah..." Ume started, but stopped immediately when she saw him biting his lips. She knew that's his usual habit when he's feeling nervous.

But of what? 

"Ume. Noona." 

Ume.

"Y-Yes?"

"I-- "

Her eyes had that disarming look again. The one that makes him want to... 

I will...

As he closed in, Ume felt the nape of her neck burning up a blush right up her cheeks. 

Protect you...

Kiss her.

____________________

The initial lightness of the kiss fell away to give way to more intensity when Kyungsoo realized she didn't pull away. Her lips felt soft, warm. The warmth trickling slow and steady throughout his body, building it into a small ball of fire. He could go on forever like this. 

Ume felt as if her breath was being short circuited increasingly as his kisses turned from tentative to sure. When his tongue fleetingly slipped deeper, her pounding heart drummed the very last oxygen out of her.

She broke off the kiss to catch her breath, and saw that Kyungsoo was heaving slightly as well.

"K-Kyungsoo-ah... "

He mumbled a short uncomprehensible response. His bashfulness revealing more of his stark youth.

Ume was suddenly struck by the reality of the situation.

This is wrong.

"Kyungsoo-ah, you need to go." Ume stood up.

"W-What?" Kyungsoo didn't understand.

"Look, I'm sorry if I.. if I had misled you in anyway. It's... not right. This. And you... it's just..."

"Do you still love him?" He interrupted. 

"What?! No! What- why are you talking about him.. it's got nothing to do with that jerk. It's just that... I'm so much older than you and you have a good future in front of you and doesn't need any further obstacles like me and... I'm not the right one for you..."

He blinked. "Why are you deciding who's the right or wrong person for me?"

"I'm not! I--- " Ume paused briefly to catch her train of thoughts. "Listen, Kyungsoo-ah." She forced herself to calm down. 

This has to end. Here.

"I'm not the girl for you. Women my age, they get married. They have kids. They have responsibilities. And you are just not... financially suitable for me." 

She lied. He was quiet.

"We're eleven years apart.. 1+1... does not equal to one, Kyungsoo-ah..." Her voice trailed off.

Kyungsoo didn't blink. The part where she said "financially suitable" rang in his head. She was right. What can he give to her? 

"I get it." He nodded, then shook his head as if to clear his thoughts. "I'll get going."

Ume followed him slowly to the door. As she opened it, he turned to her for the last time.

"Thank you... noona... for everything."

He walked away.

________________