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The first question that popped into Chin Ho's mind when he laid his eyes on the young woman asleep on the chair next to his hospital bed was, what in the world happened last night ? Her hairstyle was ruined, her beautiful white dress was stained and her makeup was pouring down her cheeks. She was a mess, to summarize. He had rarely seen his big sister in such a state and he had to admit it worried him a little.

He noticed she was frowning, as if she was having a bad dream. He wanted to hug and comfort her, but he was too tired and weak to get up. He stared at her with concern until she eventually started to move and slowly opened her eyes.

 

« Noona. » he softly called.

 

Chae In blinked and turned to him, suppressing a yawn.

 

« Hey. How are you feeling ? »

 

Hearing her own drained voice, she cleared and sat up straight while removing strands of hair from her face. Her brother raised an eyebrow and sniggered.

 

« I should be the one asking you. Did you look at yourself in a mirror ? »

 

She pursed her lips at his remark and sighed. That kid was mean but he was right, she looked like a zombie. She closed her eyes and massaged her temples with a wince. Her whole body ached and she felt exhausted.

 

« What happened to you ? » Chin Ho insisted, waiting for an explanation.

 

She looked away as her head hurt from all the memories rushing back.

 

She heard someone calling her name. In the middle of all the buzzing inside her head and the tears blurring her vision, she recognized the voice. But still, she didn't stop. She had to keep walking, she had to get out of here as fast as her legs could take her. But he was faster and soon caught up with her. Grabbing her arm, he made her stop and turn to face him.

 

« Chae In-ah. »

 

She bit her lip and looked away not to show him her ruined face. She didn't want to see him, she didn't want to see anybody. She just wanted to disappear.

 

« I'm sorry, Minhyuk, she blurted out between two sobs. I can't... I just need to be alone right now. I'm sorry. »

 

It was pathetic. She was pathetic. She didn't even dare to look into his eyes and tried to free her arm, but in vain. He had a firm hold on her and didn't seem ready to let go yet.

 

« Why are you sorry ? »

 

His harsh tone caught her off guards. She looked down, unable to speak.

 

« It's all this bastard's fault. Why are you the one sorry ? WHY YOU ? »

 

She had never seen him scream like this, nor at her nor at anyone else for that matter. She had never even seen him angry. And she was paralyzed with fear.

 

« Do you think I'm stupid ? Do you think I don't know what's going on ? »

 

This time, she looked up and met his eyes. They were wide open and filled with resentment. His face was red from rage and his teeth clenched.

 

« Why do you let yourself get hurt like this ? Do you enjoy it ? »

 

She clenched her fists as more tears silently rolled down her cheeks. Minhyuk let out a nervous laugh and shook his head, upset.

 

« Why do I have to watch you cry because of him ? He's not worth it, don't you realize that now ? »

 

He stared at her and instantly calmed down as he noticed how scared she was. He realized he had been screaming all along, adding to her tears. Confused but still mad, he released his grip and let go of her arm before taking a step back. He ruffled his hair in frustration and looked away, embarrassed.

 

« I-I'm sorry, Chae In-ah... I didn't mean to... I don't know what's got into me, I'm so sorry... »

 

No, it was her fault. She was the only one to blame for making such a mess of things. She shook her head and sniffed, trying to keep the tears from flowing.

 

« Don't be. It's all my fault. I can't believe I've been so stupid... I'm sorry, Minhyuk, I really am. »

 

He opened his mouth to reply but she turned around and walked away before he could say a word.

 

« Adult stuff. » she eventually answered, staring into space.

 

Chin Ho crossed his arms and pouted, unsatisfied.

 

« I'll understand when I grow up ? he said sarcastically.

- I hope not. Please, stay a kid forever. »

 

He laughed and she finally smiled, ruffling his hair. He then grabbed her hand and squeezed it to make her look at him.

 

« Are you okay, Noona ? » he asked with a serious face and worried eyes.

 

Chae In nodded with a sly grin.

 

« I will be. »

 

*

 

Turning to grab her coffee, Chae In winced as her body twisted. She clenched her teeth and massaged her back to try to relieve the pain. She took a sip out of her cup and sighed after swallowing the hot beverage, enjoying its warmth. She had been in the night shift almost every day for the past weeks and the lack of sleep was starting to be felt. Her body and head ached, she was exhausted. She knew her hard work was worth it, but she wasn't sure she could handle that rhythm for long.

The verdict had been announced at her last interview with the Doctor Jung and it was final. If Chin Ho didn't get surgery in the next months, the consequences would be disastrous. His condition only grew worse by the day and since taking pills didn't seem to show much result, it was now the only way for him to get better. But it was a luxury that didn't come free. The transplant cost a lot of money which Chae In didn't have. Between the regular dialysis and the hospital fees, she could barely even get by. All she could do was work even more to earn even more money quickly and hope he would hold on meanwhile.

 

« Hey, colleague. »

 

She snapped out of her thoughts and tensed up upon hearing his soft voice. She was trying to act as normal as possible around him but ever since the winter ball, she couldn't help but feel stressed every time she saw him. She knew it didn't help making the atmosphere less awkward between them though. She turned to look at him and smiled to greet him. Rubbing his neck, he grinned back and tilted his head.

 

« Can we... Can we talk ? »

 

She blinked and quickly glanced at the clock before nodding. They still had a few minutes before the broadcast and he looked like he had something important to tell her. It was true they needed to talk, now more than ever. She grabbed her cup of coffee and got up to lean against the console, looking up at him. After a few seconds where he seemed to be searching for his words, he took a deep breath and spoke.

 

« It's maybe too late but I can't handle it anymore and I really need to let it out. I apologize for what happened at the ball. I had no right to scream at you like I did or to tell you these things. I'm truly sorry, Chae In-ah. »

 

There it was again, that feeling of guilt that had been eating her away for weeks. She bit her lip to prevent the tears from coming and put down her cup, determined to speak before he could continue.

 

« Don't be, Minhyuk, you really don't have to apologize to me. You were right. About everything. And I think I somehow needed to hear those words, especially coming from you, so thank you. You helped me sort out my feelings and I really needed it. »

 

He really didn't expect her to say that, she read on his face. He blinked, speechless.

 

« The truth is... I used to like you. A lot, actually. »

 

And he really didn't expect that either. She giggled at his surprised face and gave him a sorry look. She knew it was bad to drop the bomb on him like this but she felt it was the right time to tell him.

 

« I know I should have told you sooner but I didn't expect things to get so... complicated. They say you can't control your feelings, and it's true. I never could have imagined it would turn out this way, but it just did. »

 

It was the first time she would open up like this to him. She could finally be honest with him, with herself, and it felt amazing.

 

« And I know I shouldn't. I know I should like you instead, but- »

 

She hadn't seen him coming towards her. While she was talking, he had walked up to her, leaned closer and eventually filled the gap between their two faces, softly putting his lip on hers. Her eyes opened wide and before she could even move, he instantly pulled back, looking down. He took a few steps back, blushing from embarrassment.

 

« I-I'm sorry, I just...

- I-It's okay, don't worry.

- No. No, it's not. It was stupid. I'm stupid. »

 

She shook her head with a smile to reassure him, but it didn't seem to work. He was upset, she could sense it.

 

« I should have told you sooner too. That I like you. Because now it's too late, and your heart is already taken by someone else. »

 

She could hear the bitterness of regret in his words, but somehow she felt eased by them. Knowing that he liked her only reinforced her affection for him and once again, she was thankful. If only she had realized sooner... Maybe none of this would have happened. Maybe she wouldn't feel so sad and hurt. Because of a wrong timing, they had missed each other. But if she wasn't the right for him in this life, she knew he would someday meet someone who would be worth it.

 

« I don't know what to say to you, except that I'm sorry. For everything. I wish I could give you what you want, but I can't. I can't pretend. It would only uselessly hurt the both of us. »

 

He slowly nodded in agreement and sighed.

 

« I know. There's nothing I can do anymore, I get it now. »

 

With a sigh, he lowered his head and looked away. Chae In smiled sadly and gently put a hand on his cheek to make him look at her.

 

« I'll always need you, Minhyuk. As a friend. As my best friend. And I know how selfish it is from me to ask you this, but I want you to remember. »

 

She perfectly knew it was going to take some time to get there, for everything to get back to the way it used to be, but she was ready to wait as long as it takes. She needed him in her life, and he was worth the wait.

 

« Anything for you, Im Chae In. » he gave her a warm smile.

 

She grinned and hugged him for a few seconds. Her stress and fear immediately vanished and she felt relieved. Even though everything wasn't settled in her life yet, this conversation was a step forward and it gave her hope again for the future.

Replenished, Chae In eventually let go and said she would go grab something to eat for them before the broadcast started, suggestion to which he nodded vigorously.  She walked towards the door with a giggle and just before disappearing, his serious voice was raised again.

 

« He doesn't deserve you, Chae In. »

 

Maybe. But she still liked him. She smirked and popped her head by the door before walking away.

 

« I don't deserve you either, Lee Minhyuk. »

 

 

I usually don't like having competition...

But you were definitely worth the fight. (Him)

 

 

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» Ȧut hør’s nøte.

Dear readers,

I tried to update the next chapter as soon as I could, I hope you like it  :)

I'm sorry it's short and BYG doesn't appear but I wanted some Chae In/Minhyuk time for once ^^

And don't worry, he will be back in the next chapter with more drama, so look forward to it~

Please comment & react~

Thank you, take care ♥

 

 

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