My head instantly feels dizzy even when the bus is running on a perfectly smooth road. Jongin and I freeze. “Are there any exits or stops before Seosan?” Jongin opens his mouth first.

               “It’s an express highway straight to the city.”

               The other passengers start to look at us, and I close my eyes tightly. After confirming to the driver, there seems to be no other way than going to Seosan first and boarding a bus to Seoul from there.

               Jongin and I go back to the end of the bus with our shoulders drooped, and we sit silently with our backpacks between us. The bus is half empty, and we have the entire line of back seats for ourselves.

               “I saw ‘Seo’ before and immediately thought this was the bus to Seoul…” I mumble.

               “And I followed you like a fool.” Jongin mutters.

               We exhale audibly at the same time, and I press my back to the chair.

               We spent the remaining time in the bus without a word to each other. After an hour, we set foot to Seosan in weak steps, and headed to the inside of the terminal with a strong 80’s vibe. I immediately go to the ticket booth.

               “Hello. Is there any bus to Seoul?”

               “Oh, it just left five minutes ago. The next one is ready to board in 1,5 hours.”

               I rub my face, and Jongin silently folds his arms next to me. “We need two tickets, please.”

               The waiting lounge is almost empty, and we choose to sit on the same line of seats but of course a few chairs apart. 

               From the side of my eyes I can see Jongin getting up, and he walks towards me. “Can you watch my bag while I go to the toilet?”

               I nod. I think I should go to the toilet too. Being completely still like this, I assess myself and feel a bit uncomfortable. It’s like… That time of the month.

               I just remembered that I was actually aware I had PMS before going to the orphanage, and packed some pads just in case. I was so busy with the activities that I didn’t feel anything. It’s not supposed to be the time until after I come back home though.

               When Jongin gets back, I ask him to do the same with my bag and bring my small pouch of girl things. Turns out my period hasn’t come, but I’ll get myself prepared just in case.

               I’m going back to the lounge and looking around the area. Through the window I see that this building actually oversees a beautiful blue lake in the back, and my eyes widen. I find the access door across the lounge, and rush to grab my bag. “There’s a lake behind this place! I’m going to take pictures.”

               Jongin looks confused. It’s up to him if he wants to come too or not. I walk outside, and heave an amazed sigh. There’s no one or nothing except for a big green parasol with two chairs under it and the lake and the land is separated by a sturdy cemented railing. There’s actually still a bit of distance from the water, but I guess it’s off-limits for people.

               I hear steps from behind. I turn my head, and see that Jongin is actually coming along too. Oh. He puts his bag under the parasol just like I did, and looks around the view.

               “This is breathtaking.” I tell myself as I take countless pictures, and Jongin stands near me.

               “Do you want to get your picture taken?” Jongin offers.

               “Yeah.” I give my phone to him. “You’re being generous.”

               “We’re stuck here for a while, better have some fun. If taking photos can be considered one.” Jongin says as he takes my phone. I walk to the railing and think about poses. Jongin is taking a position but his eyes narrow to see the screen. “Someone’s calling. Woong… Sunbae?”

               I gasp and run to snatch my phone. “Hello?” I walk away as fast and far as I can.

               “Hey, Dana. Have you arrived home? You told me it’d be around this hour, and you haven’t messaged me.”

               “Ah, right.” I laugh on the phone in despair. “You’re not going to believe this.” I tell him about the bus mix-up, and he responds in disbelief.

               “How did that even happen? Are you alone?”

               “No, I - “ I glance at Jongin who’s now staring at the lake with a longing look. “I’m with a friend. A fellow volunteer.”

               “That’s a relief. I would’ve gone to you if I had gone back to Seoul. Sadly I’m still in Busan.”

               “No worries, the bus is arriving soon.” I chuckle. “Thanks for your concern. I’ll text you later!”

               “Sure. I’ll wait.”

               I end the call in high spirits, and try not to jump around like a bunny. I press my lips together to stop smiling and go back to where Jongin is. I give my phone again to him, and get ready to pose. “Okay, I’m good.”

               Jongin isn’t saying anything, and takes a few photos of me. I inspect it, and sigh at the view. “The scenery is so pretty.”

               “I agree.”

               “This is the kind of place you should go with your girlfriend. Take her here later.” I nonchalantly say as I go through his work on my phone.

               “Can’t. We broke up before going to the orphanage.”

               “Wait what?” I look up from the screen.

               “Yeah. That’s why I went alone.”

               I wanted to ask more but that wouldn’t be appropriate. “Sorry to hear that.”

               “It’s nothing.” Jongin says. He takes out his phone and gives it to me. “Can you?”

               “Sure.” I say, and wait until he gets into position. He blends so well with the background with his blue flannel shirt, and he has two buttons undone around the neck, exposing some skin. The soft spring wind brushes against his hair and with his head turned like that, he unintentionally displays his side profile with his high nose and deep double eyelids.

               I look away from the screen, and secretly steal a glance at the real person in front of me when he’s having his eyes away. I just realized that he's quite a looker. Well, Sehee and a few of my friends are admirers of his looks, maybe he is good-looking… It’s just that I had a certain stance against him that made me register it only now.

               Apparently he’s not looking at the camera once, and I put down his phone. “You like to pretend you’re being photographed candidly, huh?”

               One side of his mouth goes up, and he jumps to sit on the railing. Suddenly he looks like he’s going to fall to the other side with a part of his body bending backwards.  “Whoa whoa whoa - “

               “OH MY GOD JONGIN - “

               Jongin sits up straight again, and grins. My lips part, and my legs feel wobbly. I make the motion to throw his phone, and he jumps down while laughing. “No, no, don’t. Sorry. I’m just messing around.”

               I screech, and give back his phone. “You’re annoying.”

               He laughs, and looks at the photos. “Oh, you took good ones.”

               “Well.” I shrug. “Thanks for mine, too.”

               I take a peek at him, and he seems cheery. We might be more relaxed with each other now, but isn’t he too carefree for someone who just broke up?

               “Why?” Jongin asks, noticing my behavior.

               “Nothing.” I quickly answer.

*

               The bus to Seoul came, and my body started aching fifteen minutes after it departed. Am I really having my period? Or is it just fatigue?

               I try to sleep it off, but when I wake up I feel even more restless. My fingers and toes feel cold. Jongin is watching something on his phone next to me, and it’s still some time before we arrive.

               The bus passes by our school, and we asked to be dropped off nearby. It will be easier for both Jongin and me to head home from here.

               “You look pale.” Jongin says a moment after we got off.

               “Do I?” I my dry lips. 

               “So how are you going home from here?”

               “Bus.” I say. “The stop is near the front gate.”

               Jongin's apartment is also that way and we end up walking together again. I feel cold sweat all over my body. This just feels not right. Jongin adjusts his steps with my slow ones, and I can feel him looking at me. “Are you okay?”

               I nodded slowly, but I didn’t mean it. “Yes.”

               We arrive at the bus stop, and mine will come in twenty minutes. Gosh, it’s long. I sit on the bench and exhale loudly. Jongin is standing near me with his arms folded. “You’re sure you’re fine?”

               “I think so.” I try to put some confidence in my voice. “Just… A bit exhausted.”

               “You overworked yourself these past few days, did you?”

               And one more biological reason, I think to myself. “Probably.”

               Jongin sits next to me, and faces my side. “Do you want to come to my place?”