The first thing Kwon Yuri saw once she woke up was Choi Siwon, who was sitting motionlessly next to her hospital bed. She had been waiting for him throughout the night as he said he won’t be away for long – but he was. Her fear of being left all alone was resurrected again. At this point she knew that, as much as she hates to admit it, she simply cannot bear to be alone. Yuri could barely sleep before all her physical and emotional exhaustion took over her. And this morning, all she felt was relief to found him there next to her.

“Morning,” Siwon quietly greeted the girl. His voice was hoarse.

“You’re back,” Yuri said faintly.

Siwon could only gently smile at her words. There was so much going on his mind after the conversation with his father. It left him with more burdens, greater responsibility and a slice of regret. His eyes were fixed on Yuri who was aimlessly staring at the white ceiling; letting them fall into a serene silence.

“I thought you’re not coming back,” Yuri weakly broke the silence, her eyes still avoiding his. As if bracing herself to make a shameful confession, Yuri took a breath before continued, “I think now I know what my unnie felt… you know, the idea of being all alone in this kind of situation is utterly depressing… I feel so pathetic right now, Siwon. I just realized that… I hate that I do, but… I need you.”

Yuri had no slightest idea of how her words affect him more than it should.

“We’re in this together, Yuri-yah. I’m not leaving you,” Siwon reassured. The importance in his tone was not going unnoticed by Yuri. She quietly chuckled at how pathetic she must’ve seen to him. For Kwon Yuri, admitting that she needs him was like burying her pride deep into the ground – and Siwon knew this. He fixed his gaze at her knowingly, reaching her hand for him to hold. “I’m here to stay, Yuri.”

They fell into another series of silence until Yuri recognized the agitation on his face. Hidden behind the tough façade he put out. “Is there something wrong? You look… bothered.”

“Nah, there’s nothing for you to worry about. I’m just tired,” Siwon made an excuse. He knew that she can’t be bothered by another problem now.

“What took you so long last night, anyway?” she tried to dig deeper, worrying over how gloomy he looked.Something must have happened. “You can always talk to me, you know.”

“Nothing, really… it’s just… well, my dad is back home so we talked… about us,” Siwon answered carefully. Before Yuri could even respond, he quickly added, “Don’t worry, he’s okay with this… he wants us to get married soon… but, of course, we can talk about that later, if you want to.”

Yuri could sense something fishy in the way he talked, but she decided to brush it off for now. It reminded her of what she wanted to say to him earlier. After a pause she said, “Siwon-ah… you know why I kissed you back then, right? Please don’t get me wrong… I only did so to make my father mad.”

“Yeah, I figured. What happened with you and your father, anyway? You haven’t told me anything since we left your home,” Siwon asked quietly.

“Well, he’s still as stubborn as ever… he kind of accepted my decision to keep the baby… speaking of marriage, he wants me to marry some random stranger guy… and suddenly you are the best option I have. I mean, you’re the father… and as much as I hate to admit, you’re the only one I have now… ” Yuri tried to explain, her voice quivering.

Siwon felt like as if a knot formed in his throat, feeling uneasy at her last sentence. He let out a small laugh to ease the uneasiness, “So, do want to marry me now, Yuri-yah?”

Yuri shrugged, her lips forming a weak bitter smile, “I don’t know. What should I do now, Siwon?”

Still holding her hand, Siwon gently said, “I say, we should get married once you discharged from hospital. We’re doing this for our baby, Yuri… we don’t want it to born out of wedlock, do we? I’ll do anything for the sake of our baby… You know you can trust me, right?”

Yuri nodded, “I know… it’s just that…” She didn’t finish her sentence, not knowing what exactly she wants to say. The only problem she has with the idea of marrying Choi Siwon is how much she hated him before all of this. How much she thinks Siwon isn’t the guy she would marry despite how much the boy has proven himself as a reliable person.

“I see that you’re the type who will only marry for love and all that… well, it’s not like we’re going to be married forever. I mean, once the baby is born we can always end our marriage… and then, later on you can find your true love and marry him or whatever,” Siwon tried to convinced her.

“Now you get me wrong there,” Yuri chuckled, “Actually, I’m the I-don’t-believe-in-love type. But I do think highly of marriage.”

“Really now? That’s new… if you don’t believe in love, then what kind of guy you will marry then?” Siwon asked, genuinely curious to hear her answer. He’d like to hear her explication about her constant refusal.

“I don’t know… I just believe I will find someone whom I’d like to spend the rest of my life with,” answered Yuri.

“Somebody you love,” Siwon concluded, “If you want to spend the rest of your life with a significant one, doesn’t it mean you love that person?”

“Not really. At least not that kind of love... call me selfish, but I want someone who loves me so I can return the love; but still, I don’t want to get too involved in such feeling… it’s stupid. It brings the worst out of people, and in the end, it only left you with pain,” said Yuri. All this time she saw how people broke down, make fool of themselves in the name of love -- her siblings, her best friend, and most decisively, her father. She couldn’t help but to think that being in that kind of love is pathetic, self-destructive.

“Personal experience?”

“No, just observation. Just look at my father… Hell, look at you. You became that mean person who humiliated a girl just because you already love someone else,” Yuri remarked.

“While I’m not disagreeing that I was being mean, but, gee, you sound bitter. Tell me, have you ever been in love before, Yuri?” Siwon asked, unknowingly getting riled up for the personal remark.

“Honestly no, I haven’t and I don’t want to,” Yuri answered quietly.

“You’re missing out, Yuri-yah. I’m not disagreeing… but there’s so much more of love. To put it simply, it worth much more than all the pain and the stupidity it’s inflicted, trust me.”

“You’re the one to talk.”

Siwon chuckled, “Yes, I know. As for me… well, let’s say I had enough… I don’t know how to explain this, but I just want to persevere the love I once had. Love is really that precious.”

Yuri weakly shrugged. “You must’ve loved her so much,” she commented.

“I guess... I messed up, you know. She might be still alive now if I wasn’t so selfish. Devoting my love for her, even after she’s gone, is my way to compensate her loss. I just can’t see any other girl in romantic way after she passed away.”

“Oh, thanks for confirming that whatever happened between us is nothing,” Yuri said sarcastically, surprising herself that she sounded so damn offended. Yuri quickly convinced herself that she has the right to be offended.