The day has finally arrived.

A year since he walked out the door. A year since she tried to chase him down and stop him from leaving. A year since he's been gone.

She hugs her legs closer and continues to gaze at the clear night sky. As always with her more than often trips to the roof terrace, everything within her vicinity is still and quiet, untouched and isolating. Despite the sound of the siren and a couple of horns blaring in the background of what seems to be a crisp and perfect evening for her, it still isn't enough to distract her from the incident.

She's moved on, of course, but what some people don't understand is that even if you've gotten past a certain situation, it still lingers in your mind once in awhile. Depending on the impact, it either becomes a fond memory you can look back on with an open mind or a terrifying nightmare you wish you hadn't remembered.

So, how is she supposed to react? Several of the people involved in her life now have no connection to him. She feels that it isn't necessary to bring such a delicate subject up. But then, there's her best friend, Amber. The only soul in her life who has a direct relationship with him.

She sighs, slowly realizing that she's been staring a little too long at a tiny bird perching on the rails of her balcony. As she takes one last sip from her jasmine tea, her eyes dart towards the phone she decided not to touch for the entirety of the evening. Her glance turns into a longing, but she chooses to leave it as it is.

She's aware that if she takes even the tiniest peek at the screen, she will only find Amber's endless texts and missed calls. And for whatever reason, whether it'd be acting cute, bribing her with food, or straight up begging, Amber always leeches her way into her heart. But she doesn't need any of that tonight. Just for this one night, she wants her best friend to understand that.

Amber has always been her constant rock. And after the incident, she kept her sane, especially when other people slowly faded away from her life.

Looking back, the past year seemed like a blur; one giant, surreal blur. She couldn't recall any concrete memories, but only snippets of highlighted emotions.

A sudden chill hits her spine and she shudders at the feeling. Play time's over. Her feet meet the cold ground as she quickly grabs her phone and mug. Before welcoming the warmth of her loft, she takes one last look at the black sky.

Even after a year, she could still remember every single detail from that night clearly. Everything from the butterfly tattoo of the girl she found in bed with him in his room, the shock and screaming that followed after. His voice raising an octave while repeating over and over, “You're not supposed to be here. You're not supposed to be here. You're not supposed to be here.”

The girl dressing up as quickly as she possibly could and leaving without another word. Her glare seeming to bore a thousand holes into the walls of the loft. Him running after her and stumbling through his words, while she, being the actual girlfriend, stupidly runs after him with tears welling up in her eyes. A linear chasing scene that was composed of fools in love.

The bizarre situation she could have possibly gotten herself out of if she just decided to leave him alone. If she took just one minute to answer Amber's last text about a llama joke. If she just allowed herself to get mad at him and throw everything possible in their apartment, to deal with the pain slowly consuming her.

But she didn't.

And that decision costed his life.