Exhaustion, that’s what Sunggyu have been feeling the whole day. From Sunrise to sunset the teachers kept giving them energy-draining activities, adding to his previous sleepless night.

The day started with the horn's sound, waking them up. They had to do some morning exercises, make their own breakfast, lunch and then dinner. The students were divided in groups, some helping in the kitchen, others doing errands and others organizing the camping site.

Sunggyu and few other boys were assigned to collect some tree branches to start a big fire before the nightfall. To do so, they had to go a little bit deeper in the mountain’s forest.

“Guys! Is this what I think it is?” asked Taekwon in amazement.

Sunggyu, who was very distracted, looked at the direction his friends were looking at.

Just behind a lot of trees, there was a traditional Korean house. It was very big, the exterior made of wood and only wood, and even though it looked very old, the house seemed to belong to a very wealthy person.

“Master Jung’s local house!” Sungyeol gasped.

“Who’s house?” Sunggyu questioned, not really interested by the matter. The boys gave him weird looks and ignored his question.

“Why did they look at me like that? Is this master very famous or what?”

“He was famous, not everyone knows about him. But they expected you to know him, since you’re Eunji’s friend.” Sungyeol replied.

“And what does it have to do with Eunji?”

“It’s her grandfather’s house, or was. It became hers since he died. He was a martial arts master, very famous and respected man.” Sungyeol clarified.

Sunggyu just went back to collecting the branches. He remembered Eunji mentioning something about her grandfather being a martial arts master once, but that’s it, she didn’t even mention that he was dead.

‘There’s a lot I don’t know about her then, huh?’ he scoffed to himself, getting used to the feeling of discovering new things about her.

Since he left the park the night before, he was in a complete disconnected state. He felt bad, very bad for spying on her, but mostly, felt bad for her.

‘How hard it was for her to have a mother like that? How did she grow up in such an environment? How much does it hurt to have a mother that despise you to the extinct of trying to kill you? How did she endure all that fear and pain?’ he wondered and wondered. He finally understood the secret behind Eunji’s cold exterior and behavior.

‘There’s nothing as greater as a mother’s love’ he remembered his mother’s words.

“You’re wrong, mom. For once.” He mumbled to himself.

Sunggyu was so close to his mother. She was his mother, father, brother, best friend and mentor. He never hid anything from her and she always gave him the best advices. She was enough to fill all the voids in his life. She only gave him strength and warmth.

He couldn’t imagine his life without his mother. He wouldn’t survive a day, especially after his brother’s death. To imagine her hating him and wanting to kill him, hundreds of nightmares could’ve been better and more supportable than living that way.

Eunji was feeling uneasy since she saw Sunggyu being distant that morning. He was avoiding her the whole day, or maybe because they had different missions they couldn’t cross ways.

During lunch he barely uttered a word, just kept eating absentmindedly, and the same went for dinner. Even Sungyeol and Myungsoo who were with him the whole day sensed that something was off.

“Are you okay?” Bora was the first to ask him.

“Hmmm. Just tired.” He answered curtly. His answer had the I-don’t-feel-like-speaking vibe, so she didn’t ask further.

A large fire was set in the middle of the camp, students sitting around it chatting, singing and playing games. But once again, Sunggyu just sat far from them on some rock, looking at the sea and the star-filled sky.

“The stars are beautiful from here, right?” Asked Eunji, sitting on another rock next to him.

He just hummed, not sparing her a single look.

“You’re not going to tell me what’s wrong?” she tried making him talk.

“If I do so, you’ll hate me.” He said.

“Try me.” she kept looking at him, waiting for a response while he kept staring at the sky.

“I was at the park last night.” He confessed.

“The park?” Eunji asked in confusion, before she realized what he was implying. Her eyes widened and her body stiffened.

“How much did you hear?” she asked after a while.

“Everything.” He said, she hummed.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he finally looked at her. “It must’ve been hard on you. I think hard is a little word to describe your suffering.” He released a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry.” He apologized.

“Why are you apologizing for?”

“For eavesdropping, invading your privacy and mostly for being an untrustworthy friend. I didn’t see how much you’ve been suffering.” He sincerely said, his eyes landing back on the dark sky.

His words had their effect on Eunji’s heart, making it flood with warmness.

“You didn’t do anything wrong. What you heard yesterday wasn’t a secret. It’s meant to be out to the public, you just discover it earlier than other people. And you’re not an untrustworthy friend, what even makes you think so?” she wondered.

“You make me think so!” he snapped back at her. “You never tell me anything! If I don’t find about things accidentally, I’ll never know. Most of the personal things I know about you, I heard them from strangers. You never willingly tell me anything it makes me question our friendship.” He finally said. Being angry wasn’t his thing, but she made him lose his temper. He regretted his words when he saw the hurt flashing in her face, but he needed to say that. He needed to get it out off his chest.

“I didn’t think it made you feel that way.” She said in a small voice. She realized how her actions have been hurting him, and it made her feel bad.

“I really have been trying to open up and to tell you many things. You’re the only person I’ve ever trusted this much and the greatest friend I’ve ever had. I’m sorry for making you feel otherwise.” She apologized. Sunggyu turned to her, sensing her genuineness.

“I’m sorry for getting angry, I was just tired.” He said, resting his hand on hers.

“It’s okay. It was because of my insensitive acts anyways. You were right I should open up more.” She smiled to him reassurengly.

They stayed silently staring at the stars for a while, the night breeze caressing their faces.

“I know that I shouldn’t ask, but… did your mother really try to… to k-kill you?” Sunggyu asked stuttering, making Eunji chuckle bitterly.

“Unbelievable right!” she paused for a little, her expression hardening. “My mother never really loved me, even since my birth. Does she have a reason? I can’t find one yet. When I see how much she loves Dongwoo, I think that maybe because I’m a girl. When I see how much she loathes my father, I think maybe because I’m my father’s daughter. It may be both reasons, it may be none” She sighed.

“When was it?” Sunggyu knew he was crossing some boards here, even reopening old wounds, but he wanted to know.

“Ten years ago. When the fight for my custody was burning. My mother hated losing. I was passing the weekend with my father so she sent someone to do the job, and then blame it on him. Cunning, right? I’m just glad that none of them won the case.” She smiled warmly.

“Then who did?” Sunggyu knew this piece of the story, but he wanted to hear it from her, liking the way she was finally speaking in.

“My grandfather. I told you about him, he was a martial arts master, very known. I lived with him for six years. His house in nearby, in the mountain. When he died, I moved to live with Dongwoo.”

“I’m sorry for you loss. He must’ve been a great man.”

“Yes he was.” She smiled fondly, looking at the sky.

“But, regardless that he was a martial arts master and old, how did your parents lose the case to him?” Sunggyu questioned.

“Simply because he was the one to raise both of them. After my grandparents’ death, my mother was seen by the public as a broken human being and tried to be tender with her. Putting her in an orphanage was out of question, so my grandfather came in the picture and took her in with my father. He took care of her as his own daughter, getting her back to school and even paying her college tuition. He knew she was bad, heck he probably knew she was the one who killed her parents, so when my father decided to marry her, he opposed the idea so much. I wish my father listened to him at least that time.” Her voice was cold and emotionless, but Sunggyu understood what she was implying.

“Eunji-ah, don’t you ever say that again. Your existence is important for a lot of people, for you to wish you never were born. You grandfather, you father, Dongwoo, Sungjong, those idiots,” he mentioned by his head at his friends fooling by the fire, making her chuckle. “Me.” He finished.

They stayed looking at each other for a while, before she muttered a thank you to him.

“Come on, it’s getting colder and late. We should sleep if we want to survive tomorrow. They said we’re going to hike the mountain.” The idea itself made him exhausted.

“Yeah, it looks like a long day.”

At the peak of down, the students were half asleep, half walking, making their way to the mountain’s summit.

The vice headmaster, Song Changui, was leading the way, while Miss Amy and Mr. Kwon were at the tail of the line of students, to prevent anyone from getting lost or left by.

Mr. Song was talking none stop about the area, the mountain and everything he could memorize from the historical books he probably read before coming.

Once they reached the now familiar old house, he started speaking about it history.

“This old house is the Jung’s family property and it had been passed from a generation to another over the years. It was built before the first world war, in 1910 and…”

“1909.” Everyone looked at Eunji who just cut his words. He glared at her.

“It was built in 1909 but inhabited in 1910.” She corrected him, making him red with anger.

He ignored her and continued speaking about the Jung’s family. The students took it as a chance to rest a little bit.

“Every generation in the Jung’s family had at least a martial arts master. They were one of the best in the field, having their own secret techniques that only the heir would master. They helped a lot during the war time and served the Korean army a lot. They’re also known for taking in apprentices and teaching them most of their knowledge.”

“Sungjong was grandfather’s apprentice, that’s when we met.” Eunji whispered to Sunggyu, making him surprised by the little revelation.

“I must be careful around him from now on, I think.” He said in a fearful tone, making her giggle.

“The house doesn’t have any tenants anymore. It could’ve been considered as a historical site if it wasn’t for its current owner who’s refusing to let anyone in.” Mr. Song, glared at Eunji, the other students looking in her direction too. Well she completely ignored them.

The rest of the hike was full of students complaining and some getting minor injuries, nothing special to mention.

The night came quickly and the students sat as usual around the big fire enjoying their time.

Myungsoo took out his guitar and started singing, catching the attention of the female students. It was a soft love song, but everyone noticed that his eyes never left Krystal’s, the latter blushing like crazy.

Sunggyu and Sungyeol joined him later, singing more cheerful songs.

“Guys! Do you want to play a game?” Hyorin suggested. All of their classmates agreed cheerfully. They ended up sitting in a circle, playing spin the bottle.

“Krystal, do you want to date me?” Minhyuk asked.

“Sorryyyy! I’m taken.” She answered in an amused tone.

“! I think I should find someone else!” the boy cursed, making everyone laugh.

The bottle span once more.

“Myungsoo! You’re her boyfriend right?” asked Victoria.

“Isn’t that obvious?!” he smirked, taking Krystal’s hand and exchanging a loving stare with her, gaining an ‘OOOOH’ and ‘Ahhhh’ from their audience.

It was known for everyone that they only had eyes for each other. But it took them too long to finally go official. So when they told their friends that they got together on the first day of the trip, they were so happy for them.

The bottle kept spinning few times, everyone enjoying the embarrassing questions being asked.

“Sungyeol, did you ever had a romantic past with Bora?” Niel asked.

Sungyeol’s face reddened and he had a difficulty responding.

“W-We never had that kind of relationship.” He finally stuttered.

Well no one believed him, especially when Bora gave him a dark hurt glare and left the circle. He followed her suit, knowing he just screwed up.

“Eunji, I have a personal question for you.”

‘This doesn’t sound good.’ Sunggyu thought when the bottle stopped between Eunji and Doojoon, the latter had a huge smirk on his mouth.

“How far did you and Sunggyu went? Hugging? Kissing? Sleeping together?” he asked, his smirk growing bigger.

Sunggyu didn’t know what got into him, he just felt his blood boiling in his veins, his fist landing on Doojoon’s jaw and his hand finding Eunji’s to drag her out of the scene.

He didn’t know where his feet were taking him. Ignoring all of her protests, he just kept walking while a string of curses left his mouth.

“Sunggyu STOP!” she finally yelled, freeing her hand from his. It made him gain back his composer.

“What did you do that?! You’re going to be punished, that’s for sure.”

“No, that jerk needs to be taught a lesson! Did you expect me to stay calm after what he just said?!” he gritted.

“Well you just gave him what he wanted! And you only confirmed his words when you reacted that way! You should’ve let me deal with him!”

Sunggyu felt extremely bad when he realized his mistake. He covered his face in regret.

“I got angry that’s all. I didn’t stand him talking to you in that way.” He said apologitically.

“What’s done is done. His words aren’t wrong anyways. We did something from those three choices. It may be a drunken mistake but it happened.” She said in a calm tone.

“It wasn’t.” Sunggyu said. Eunji gave him a questioning look.

“I wasn’t that drunk and I didn’t do it out of drunkenness. It was a sober choice.” He finally admitted.

“What do you mean?” she questioned, still not comprehending his words.

“That night, I kissed you willingly.” He looked straight in her eyes. He saw that the confusion was still there. “Because I like you.”

Sunggyu felt light. After months of constant hesitation, he finally confessed his feelings to her. But the weight of the nervousness that came after fell on him right away.

Eunji was still processing the words, not wanting to process them to be more exact.

“I didn’t know how it happened or when it started, but I found myself liking you everyday more and more. The feelings I have for you only growing and filling my heart.”

“Sunggyu what are…” his hand caressing her cheek stopped her from continuing.

“I like you, Jung Eunji. I like you more than a friend. I like you more than I ever liked anyone before.” He finished, his eyes conveying all the feelings he couldn’t voice out and describe with words.

And Eunji saw them all although she didn’t want to.

It got silent for a while; the only sound heard was the sound of the waves hitting the shore.

The next thing Sunggyu knew was a hand slapping his hand away harshly. Eunji taking two steps back, eyes cold as ice.

“Sunggyu if you’re joking then you should stop, I’m getting mad.” She said firmly.

“Do I look like I’m joking?” he was the one getting angry.

“Since you’re not joking then I’ll tell you this: I’m sorry but I don’t have any feelings toward you.” She replied, her face stoic and expressionless.

Sunggyu scoffed.

“What part of your lie are you expecting me to believe? You may put a cold façade every time you want to deny your feelings, but you can’t fool me.” He smirked when he saw the fearful look in her eyes. But Eunji wasn’t an easy target.

“How much do you know me for you to think you can read me?”

“Enough to know that you have feelings for me. Maybe they’re not as strong as mine, but you have them. I can see them in your eyes every time you look at me. I can feel them in your words when you talk to me, your smiles whenever we’re together. And no matter how much you’ll deny them, I know they exist.” His confident answer made her dumbfounded.

For instant, Sunggyu thought he won the argument, but her scoff made him remember how stubborn she was.

“Don’t kid yourself and accept the fact that I just rejected you.” She spat, before turning to leave. But Sunggyu caught her hand, using his last card.

“Why did you kiss me back then?”

“I was drunk, remember.” She lied, to herself more than him.

“Yeah, drunk enough to beat five gangsters.” He said sarcastically, not the least amused. “I will accept the fact that you just rejected me, but not because you don’t like me. You rejected me because you don’t want admit your feelings. You rejected me because you’re a coward.” He said.

‘How can you know me more than I know myself?’ Eunji wondered after he left her standing there cluelessly.

“Bo…”

“Leave Sungyeol! LEAVE!” She shouted from inside the tent, her voice shaky.

He’s been trying to get her out of there for about an hour, but she’s been refusing to do so.

“I’m sorry, for saying that earlier.” He sat of the floor outside the tent. “I didn’t want to put you in a bad situation, revealing our past to them.” He confessed.

“Like you didn’t put me in a bad one already in front of everyone!” she said with shaky tone, obviously crying.

“I’m sorry.” He apologized again. “I didn’t know what to do, knowing how much you hate bringing that up.”

“Only because you never let it work back then…” she muttered, enough for him to hear.

“I know, I was a fool, and I’m still a fool.” He smiled bitterly. “All what I’ve been doing these years was to protect our friendship. I still hate myself for hurting you back then. I don’t want to lose you again. You’re too precious for me. I can’t imagine not having you in my life. So Bora, please, forgive this fool, huh?” he pleaded.

He waited for few minutes, almost losing hope, before he heard the tent’s zipper opening. Bora’s eyes were puffy and red, a sight that made him hurt.

“I won’t forgive you easily you know!” she gave him a sulky glare.

“I know. What do I have to do to have my best friend back? Lunch? Movie? Chocolat?” he asked, knowing how to cheer her up.

“All of it!” she answered shamelessly.

“I can already hear my wallet crying.” He joked, making her finally smile.

Bora and Sungyeol dated before, when they were in middle school. It wasn’t a wise decision, even though they liked each other too much to be just friends.

They were still young, childish and inexperienced, especially Sungyeol. Arguments between them became an everyday thing and little by little they drifted apart. They didn’t even have a proper break up. They just stopped talking one day. But few months later, they realized how much they needed and missed each other. Sungyeol had to try very hard to gain Bora’s trust back, since he was the one that screwed the most.

They were still in love, none of them ever dared to date anyone else. But after their previous experience, they were afraid to ruin their friendship beyond repair.

Only few knew about their dating past, since it was kept secret even during that time. Still, people around them knew they were more than friends.

Something was off, that’s what everyone thought. How couldn’t they see it when Sunggyu and Eunji were both having a very dark aura around them? None of them spoke much, mostly spacing out and keeping distant from each other, obviously avoiding each other.

“If these two didn’t fight, feel free to cut all of my hair and replace it with an old man’s wig.” Myungsoo said to his friends, when the two concerned were out of earshot.

“You’ll still look handsome though.” Said Krystal bashfully, making him blush in the process.

“Can you go and flirt somewhere else please?!” Sungyeol glared at them.

“JEALOUS!!” Krystal stuck her tongue out making him send her a threatening look.

“But seriously, what could’ve happened? They were just fine last night.” Bora wondered.

“Why do I feel that it have to do with what Doojoon said last night?” Sungyeol guessed and everyone nodded.

“That boy just need a beating!” huffed Bora in frustration.

“It wasn’t because of him.” Sunggyu slammed his food tray on the table. “I confessed.” He added.

They all widened their eyes at his bluntness.

“What? Wasn’t it obvious that I liked her?” he asked, annoyed.

“That’s not the surprising part! She rejected you?!” none of them believed that, even when he nodded.

“If Eunji doesn’t like you, I will cross dress for a week.” Myungsoo said.

“Do you like putting your image at risk or what?” Sungyeol gave him the are-you-kidding-me look.

“I mean that she’s lying! It was obvious as the sunlight that she likes Sunggyu!” he replied.

“Well, she couldn’t see it herself obviously!” Bora was giving Sunggyu a concerned look.

To say that Sunggyu was mad was an understatement. He was mad at Eunji for denying her feelings and rejecting him, mad at himself for confessing so bluntly, for falling for her so easily and especially for ruining their friendship.

She was obviously avoiding him and the others, making herself busy with whatever. When Sunggyu said those words, he thought they’ll work in his favor, pushing her to her limits and finally confession to him. But it came back at him, making them once again distant.

The school trip ended after the fifth day, nothing changing. Sunggyu’s mood was as ty as ever and it stayed the same for the last week of the summer vacation.

Dongwoo and Sungjong have been staring at the girl for almost an hour, exchanging concerned looks from time to time. Since the day she came back from the trip, she didn’t leave the house, not even for once.

She would spend the whole day lazing on the couch, eating and watching, or more likely staring at the TV.

She wouldn’t budge no matter how much they kept petering her with questions.

‘Leave me alone!’

‘I don’t feel like it.’

‘I don’t want to.’

‘I’m tired.’

That’s all she’s been feeding them for the past week.

“Aren’t you going to school tomorrow?” Dongwoo tried again, hoping for a proper response.

“No.” she said, eyes fixed on the movie playing on the big screen.

“That’s it!” the last bit of patience he had drained and he turned the TV off right away.

“Yah! I was watching that!!” she yelled in protest.

“WE NEED TO TALK!! LIKE RIGHT NOW!” he screamed, getting all of her attention on him.

Dongwoo wasn’t the type to get angry easily, at least not at her. So when he did, she knew she really messed up.

“You’re going to tell me what’s wrong! Else I’m calling Sunggyu or one of your other friends and I’ll get it from them!” he glared at her.

“I can’t talk about it…” she mumbled, lowering her head.

“Eunji, please. I won’t get mad, I’m just concerned about you.” He put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

Sungjong had long gone into his room, giving them space.

“Oppa.” She lifted her head, Dongwoo’s motherly eyes giving her the courage to continue. “Do you think that a person like me is able to have feelings?”

Dongwoo almost cried when he heard her question and saw how much of hurt her eyes had.

“Is it Sunggyu?” he gave her a knowing look. Eunji didn’t response. Instead she asked another question, confirming his doubts.

“For a person like me, is it possible to actually fall in love?”

“And what wrong with someone like you? You remember the doctor’s words. It’s you who have control over your feelings since you’re the one who shut them back then. Your condition has nothing to do with your emotions and feelings.” He caressed her head. “Set them free, or at least let him set them free for you.”

“It’s scary.” She mumbled.

“It’s okay. I’ll be here for you.”

He hugged her. It felt safe. That’s how Dongwoo’s hugs make her feel every time.

“Thank you, oppa.” She muttered, wrapping her hands around him.

Eunji decided to talk with Sunggyu at school. She just needed to grab a chance, which was almost impossible. Sunggyu was avoiding her in all possible ways, never staying alone.

‘Since when he’s friend with those two?!’ she huffed when she saw him with two seniors.

Even during lunch, he kept all of his focus on his lunch and some stupid game on his phone. Even though they were sitting on the same table, he didn’t spare her a single look.

That’s when Eunji resorted to the last choice she had, texting him.

From: Eunji:

Meet me after class in our usual spot.

Sunggyu sighed when he saw the text message. He didn’t like treating her like that and missed speaking with her like hell, but he was still mad because of her insincerity.

He decided to meet her never less. It was childish to keep ignoring her.

After school ended, he went straightly to their spot. It was an excluded part of the school’s garden. Out of everyone’s sight and according to her ‘the most beautiful spot’. Sunggyu couldn’t agree less. It had the most colorful flowers, the highest trees and the best scent, coming from the night jasmines that were planted there, and only there.

Eunji was already waiting for him, sitting on the bench, tapping her fingers on the wooden surface impatiently.

“You came.” She awkwardly said when he sat next to her. Sunggyu didn’t miss the glimmer in her eyes when she saw him.

‘And you said you don’t like me.’ He thought.

“We need to get over with this. We can’t keep things this awkward between us.” He admitted.

“I’m sorry. I’m always making it hard, aren’t I? After all what you did to make our friendship happen, I’m the one ruining it.” She said apologetically.

“Glad you know.” He replied harshly. She didn’t expect him to be that cold towards her.

“You said it yourself; I tried too hard to make it happen. I was the one who suggested we become friends and I’m the one who opened to you first. While all you do is to keep secrets from me, it makes me sometimes wonder if you ever took our friendship seriously, or at least as much as you made it look.” Eunji was shocked by his tone and words.

“But I won’t let it get ruined because of your selfishness or mine, since I’m no better. I will stop being childish and accept the fact that you don’t like me. Let’s just forget that I ever confessed and continue being partners. We’ll reset our relationship since it will take time for me to get rid of my feelings toward you.”

‘This is not what I expected.’ Eunji was dumbfounded by Sunggyu’s response.

He was always so forgiving and nice. For him to become this cold toward her means one thing: he was really hurt by her words that night.

“Let’s keep it that way then.” She agreed, not finding the power to protest.

“Since it’s settled, I’ll leave.” He stood, not sparing her a single look.

‘I’m sorry, for ruining everything.’ She couldn’t even voice her apology.

Sunggyu was so serious about his words. He came back to the time Eunji was just a partner, the only times they talked in were when they had some assignment together. No matter how much she tried to start a conversation with him, it was futile. His answers were short, very short to her liking.

Dongwoo opened the door in a hurry, happy to see Sunggyu.

“Long time no seen Gyu!”

“Dongwoo Hyung! How are you?” Meeting Dongwoo was always a pleasure for Sunggyu, even if he came with a heavy heart to the apartment.

“Let me guess, another assignment?” Dongwoo guessed, letting Sunggyu in.

“You’re right. Are you going out?” he asked, seeing the man all wrapped up in a suit, picking papers from the table and putting them in his paper case.

“Yeah I have a meeting and I’m really late. I would love to stay with you longer but I need to go. Eunji went to the store and will be coming in few minutes, you can wait for her, make yourself home.”

Dongwoo bid him goodbye and left right away.

Sunggyu climbed the stairs to the home library and sat their waiting for his partner. His eyes kept studying the books on the shelves. All related to music and art in a way or another.

But one book stood out.

Sunggyu found himself examining it right away.

“Rare Psychological illnesses science couldn’t unfold.” He read the title out loud. “A medical book? What is it doing in here?”

He started flipping through it, until he stopped at a certain page, where he found a folded paper. He took it out and unfolded it.

He frowned reading the hand written words on it, his frown getting deeper when he saw the content of the book's page he stopped at.

‘I don’t have any feelings toward you.’ He remembered Eunji’s words.

“I wish this isn't the reason behind her words...” he mumbled dreadfully.

So this chapter was ready since last Friday, but I didn’t want to post it unless I get a 90th subscriber and I did :D

Thank you for your supportive comments :** 

And fyi the next chapter is ready ;) 

I hope you like this chapter, tell me what you think about it and your guesses, see you next time :**