Chapter Sixteen:

Present

"We're being asked to release a statement," Jiyong spoke quietly, seated on Youngbae's couch with his knees pulled up to his chest. He looked like a child, staring off into space, phone held loosely in his hand.

"Is that a good idea?" Youngbae asked. He was crowding himself into the opposite corner of the couch, arms crossed over his chest. He knew the news wouldn't be good when the leader's face became a mask of unreadable emotion once he got off the phone.

"It's been going on for too long. People are asking questions and it's only a matter of time before someone slips up and says something."

"It's been months, nothing has happened."

"We've been lucky, Bae."

The dancer looked at his best friend, knowing just how true those words were. They had been very good about keeping Seungri's condition quiet, all the while making sure that no one leaked any information. However, recent events, especially with the pictures of Seunghyun and Jiyong fighting outside of the hospital, things were starting to unravel, "What do we even say?"

"I don't know."

The leader buried his face in his hands, trying to let the words come to him. It was like composing a really long poem, full of apologies and vague asides. It shouldn't have been that hard, but he could already imagine the onslaught of questions that would come as soon as they put out the truth.

-

2011

Jiyong was quiet, sitting in the CEO's office, waiting to hear what was going to be said next. He had no out in this situation. The test didn't lie, necessarily, but he couldn't tell the truth either.

"Listen," Yang Hyunsuk's voice was stern, yet there was a gentleness in his words, "I know this isn't the best time, but we're going to have to say something to the public about this incident."

"What do you want me to say?" the leader asked, unable to look at his boss, unsure of how to even respond.

"What do you want me to say, Jiyong?"

"Sunbaenim..."

"It may be good to get away for a bit, take a short break."

In that moment, Jiyong looked up, glancing at the softened features of his CEO. The man before him had been there for him for all his trainee years and saw to it that his talent was drawn out, no matter how much of a brat he acted at the beginning. He saw the man who was practically his father, sitting behind that big wooden desk, addressing him in the gentlest if ways, despite how horrible the scandal could be for him.

"Is that a good idea?" the leader asked.

"Call it reflection."

And for the first time in days, Jiyong smiled.

-

Present

Youngbae jolted in his seat when his phone started going off, signaling he had a text. He rolled his eyes at himself and went to see what was being sent to him. As he unlocked his phone, he realized that the message had been sent to their group conversation.

I'm going home.

He re-read the message, glancing at the name above the bubble. Seungri.

It took him a moment, but he soon realized it meant that the maknae was discharging himself from the hospital. The comprehension filled him with dread, knowing that there could only be a couple of reasons why their youngest was leaving the hospital.

His phone started to go off again.

Seungri, what does that mean?

What happened?

Seungri, what?

They discharged you?

The questions kept filtering in from the others, lighting up the screen, but Seungri was no longer responding.

He knew then that they would have to release a statement much sooner rather than later and he hated the idea more than he could have imagined.

-

2012

"We should tell Seungri we love him," Daesung said.

"I can't tell him that right now," Youngbae answered, knowing full well that his words would be broadcast. He knew he had to be careful of what was being said. It wasn't their place to be accepting of what had happened, at least, not in the eye of the public.

He had already texted Seungri previously, scolding him, but playfully nudging him as well. This is really going to solidify your playboy image, he had said, all the while laughing to himself.

They knew that controversies would come and go, but no one, not even Youngbae could have predicted that one of their biggest scandals would be because their maknae had bed photos published. It was especially shocking that the woman who leaked the photos had to follow up with a few words of her own about certain kinks.

You're such a mess. Youngbae texted Seungri.

Sorry, hyung.

Too late for that now.

I know.

Just be more careful next time.

I'll work harder.

Found out more than I needed to know about you.

Hyung!

As with all news items and scandals, he knew this would pass. But for now, they had to make the rounds and answer uncomfortable questions.

But it was alright.

Because in hindsight, it wasn't as if Seungri had done that should have been considered wrong.

-

Present

Youngbae hesitated for a moment before he knocked on the door, not knowing if he was ready to have the conversation he knew would he coming. He could hear the sounds of someone shuffling to the door and his heart raced in his chest.

When Seungri's face greeted him, he let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding.

"Hyung?" the younger man asked, voice a quiet rasp.

"Can I come in?" Suddenly, he felt awkward, not knowing what to do or how to react.

The maknae nodded his head before opening the door further. Youngbae stepped inside the apartment, noticing how bare it was and how it seemed as if the smells from the hospital had made their way there, seeping into Seungri's living space.

"I know what you're going to ask," Seungri was already speaking, pulling his sweatshirt tighter around his thin frame.

"And that is?" the older man asked, eyes fixed on the younger.

Youngbae hadn't seen Seungri in a while, but he could tell that not much has changed, except for the fact that they were no longer in the hospital. The younger man looked a little stronger, a little more steady on his feet, but he was still too thin, his clothes practically swallowing him.

" I can't keep living in the hospital," Seungri's voice was low, his posture protective, arms crossed, "No more treatments. No more doctors. It's done."

"Why?"

The younger man bit his lip, eyes focused on the floor, "There's nothing else they can do for me."

"Ri..."

"There's nothing else to say."

Youngbae couldn't stop himself from rushing forward and pulling Seungri into a tight hug, refusing to let go when the younger man tried to push him away. He held tight, every fiber of his being telling him to not let go. He knew that the maknae was probably hating how he was reacting, but he couldn't help himself. As much as it was an impulse to comfort Seungri, it was also an impulse to comfort himself.

"Hyung," the younger man's arms were wrapped around Youngbae's torso, "It's okay."

"No, it's not," the older man breathed, voice shaking.

"It's going to be fine."

"No."

Nothing will ever be fine again.

-

Note: This is getting a lot harder to write. I'll do my best and hope I don't disappoint. Thank you everyone for reading and commenting. It always brightens up my day when I see that you guys are enjoying this story!