“When will you introduce your girlfriend, hyung?” Jiyong asked Seunghyun the moment their orders came. After their MV shoot, the group decided to have dinner together, leaving Seunghyun utterly sad. He wanted to have dinner with Sunhee instead… they haven’t had a dinner, even once.

“What girlfriend?” Seungri turned from Jiyong to Seunghyun. Daesung looked alarmed, but Seunhyun just sighed. He missed Sunhee already…

“What are you talking about?” Seunghyun muttered. “I think the meat isn’t cooked yet.”

Youngbae scoffed. “Hyung, the meat’s already tender.” He took another bite. “Try to taste it.”

“But the color—”

“Yah, you’re trying to change the subject.” Jiyong cut Seunghyun. Seunghyun looked at him.

“I’m not.”

“Yes you do.” If Jiyong and Seunghyun only met once, Jiyong would’ve been afraid of Seunghyun’s stare. But they were together for years, so it doesn’t really affect him.

“Jiyong hyung,” Daesung gulped. “Why do you think our TOP hyung is hiding a girlfriend?” Daesung is dreading the answer. Damn, how did Jiyong possibly know? Did he see Sunhee and Seunghyun smooching somewhere in the Sonic by accident? Daesung hoped those two are more careful than he thinks they are.

“I just feel that hyung is hiding a girl from us.” Jiyong shrugged. “I want to know who she is.”

“You’re talking nonsense, Ji.” Seunghyun said. It’s not that Seunghyun is denying Sunhee here. How could he even deny the woman he loves? He was just implying Jiyong is talking nonsense about meeting Sunhee. They couldn’t meet while all of the parties are not ready yet.

“Okay. But you can’t hide that long.” Jiyong winked and gun-shot Seunghyun with his hand. The others shook their heads and laughed, but both Seunghyun and Daesung know it is already a threat. Maybe Jiyong doesn’t know about Sunhee yet, but he already has a hunch.

 

They had a few more talks after, mostly about their private lives, stuff like Youngbae’s new crush and Jiyong’s upcoming blind date, and some work too. They went home after their dinner. Seunghyun’s still thinking about what Jiyong had said, those threating eyes that he would show when he knows something you don’t. Jiyong may be a mixture of sweet and cool for the public, but really, he is troublesome and tenacious; he would do anything he thinks is right.

Suddenly Seunghyun wanted to get drunk tonight.

The problem with them is, they are always thinking about fans. Members of Bigbang had that one and only similarity. No wonder Jiyong always leave his girl, Youngbae stayed with crushes, and Daesung cannot find a girl who understands him. Seungri can't even take his new girlfriend (which Seunghyun thinks Seungri really likes) seriously.

Maybe that is also the reason why Seunghyun doesn’t want to confess to Jiyong and the others just yet. He isn’t ready for their reaction. Not that he was sure they wouldn’t like Sunhee; there is a possibility that they would like her. Daesung liked Sunhee the second time they met, and the others may have the same fate.And what if they’ll do? What if because they like Sunhee so much, they would start urging them to tell the fans?

No way. Seunghyun can’t drag Sunhee to the world he has.

But still, he can't leave Sunhee just yet. He just confessed he loves her, and he's not ready to let go.

Right now he just wanted to get drunk until he remembers nothing.

Maybe he really can't remember anything, because just before he dozed off he sent several texts to Sunhee.

 

~-~-

 

I went to Seunghyun's house after I visited the cafe. I rang the doorbell but he isn't answering. I hate waiting like this, and since I knew his password I decided not to wait and just come in.

The dim lights are on and there are stale bottles of beer on the table, implications that he'd been here. I took my shoes off and started to walk and find him silently. Frankly I'm kind of annoyed with him. He told me to go here this morning, and now where is he? If he's sleeping, I would get annoyed more. But if he left me here, alone, I would wait for him to come back and spank him in the face.

I placed the food I brought on his table and walked to his room, and he's there, sitting at the edge of his bed while reading a book. I took a deep breath. What to do with him now? None of the circumstance I thought happened.

 

“Seunghyun-ssi.” I said and he looked at me. He then smiled, placed the open book on his bed and went to me. His face grew some hair, but then he's still handsome. “You didn't go down. I thought you left.” I said. He then suffocated me with his hug.

“I won't go anywhere without you.” He replied. “I missed you.”

“You just saw me last week.” I argued and broke the hug. He looked at me.

“Last week, and we can't have some time because of the shoot.” He sighed. “It must've been really hard, but you can just leave your crew alone. Why did you stay?”

“It's a joy to be there.” I simply said, and it's true. I wouldn't replace that cafe with money or anything the world wants. “And besides, I want to guard you from that bi—” I saw him grinning so I stopped. “Let's go down, I brought food.”

He frowned. “I want to eat somewhere else.”

“You know we can't.” I shrugged. He knows we can't trust people here. Everytime he's with someone else, people would think it’s his girlfriend. And now, I swear Bigbang is slightly putting the correct puzzle pieces together. Youngbae-ssi and Jiyong-ssi started going to my café and were like running a surveillance when they’re there. “And anyways, I have to get home after... So...”

“After we eat?” His frown became deeper. “That's boring. Can't you sleep here?”

“I can—”

“You can?” He said excitedly.

“But I don't want Yoongi oppa to get angry.” He frowned once again.

“When will you stop thinking about him?”

“Never.”

“Sunhee, I'm your boyfriend, not him.” He said, and I know he's near to shouting.

“I know.” I breathed. “But he's like my big brother, and the house is his, so I should obey his house rules.”

“You should live here.” He said with finality. He's been saying it for thousands of times already, though now, it seems that he really means it.

“I will, but not now.” I tried smile and grabbed his arm. “Come on, let's eat.”

 

We went downstairs and arranged the table before eating. When we're done, I agreed to go up and stay with him for a while.

He lied down on his bed after taking the book back to the shelf. He then tapped the mattress twice before I joined him. I lied with my head on his arm.

 

“Let me sleep before you go.” He said.

“You'll not walk me at least to your front door?”

“No.” He smiled, then kissed my forehead. I jerked because of his small, growing goatee. “Why?” He looked at me curiously. I touched my forehead to ease the feeling.

“Your goatee tickled me.” I giggled and he touched his chin absentmindedly, smiling. “You have to shave it.”

“I'm starting to think I should grow it though.” When I stared at him, he shrugged. “Ugh, maybe for a new image?” I scoffed, not really wanting to believe what he said. He grinned as a reply and sat. “You want to shave it?”

I blinked, and then looked at him curiously. “Me?” I pointed myself. He nodded. I shook my head in return and waved my hands. “No way.”

“Yes way.” He grinned and pulled me out of bed.

“Are you laughing at me?” I asked as I walk with him. He knows I don't want messing with someone's face! Touching is not really an issue, but shaving or putting something? It's my weakness.

“No.” He shook his head, suppressing a smile. I can see amusement in his eyes so I frowned. He held my hand as we made our way to his bathroom, grabbed his shaving cream and razor and gave it to me at once. “Here. You can shave my face now.”

“I can't... You're taller.” I said as an excuse. He shook his head while smiling, obviously enjoying himself.

Then suddenly he grabbed me by my waist and quickly placed me beside the sink so I am sitting on a tiled top, awkwardly holding the razor on my right hand and the cream on my left. “There you go.” He said and smiled, and placed his hand on the edge of the tiled top, on my both sides. Now that our faces are on the same level if I bend a little, and I can see everything that cannot be tricked by the light.

“You really enjoy this.” I shook my head and tutted. His grin became wider. “Come closer, I don't want to cut your face.”

 

He did as he's told and came closer. First I put some cream on the half of his face. He closed his eyes as I gently spread it on his face and neck, and when I'm done, I bent a little to wash my hands on the sink beside me. I saw him looking at me when I looked back at him.

 

“Careful, Sunhee-ssi.” He smiled. I twitched my lips.

“Fine.”

 

Then I started to trace his chin and neck, nervously and yet quickly, wanting it to get done in a minute, with the razor. He didn't squint, even frown or smile. He didn't look stiff (I was amazed at how relaxed he is when he knows his face is about to get ruined). He didn't look at me either (I didn't feel his stare). He knows I'll get awkward with him looking at me like something's wrong with the way I'm shaving his face. I breathed halfway when I caught myself that I'm too focused to breathe, and let the blade follow my hand again, and like a masterpiece, I proudly smiled when it's done.

 

“Done.” I grinned after I drop the razor in the mug. He opened his eyes and smiled.

“Now I can kiss you.” His face went near me and pouted to kiss me. I placed my hand on his lips and chuckled.

“When did you become a kiss-freak?” I asked and threw him a towel. He showed a mocking face and cleaned the remains of the cream. I jumped down the sink while he's doing it and when he's done he held my hand and dragged me out and back to his bedroom.

“Anyway… Di you receive my text?” He said while dragging me out.

“What text?”

“The one that I sent last week…” He sat on the edge of the bed. I looked at him curiously before reaching for my bag.

“What kind of text…?” I muttered as I rummage my bag for my phone. When I found it, I started looking for Seunghyun’s text, ignoring Yoongi oppa’s. Anyway he just wanted me to go home ASAP.

 

And then I saw it again.

 

Sunhee-ssi...

Lee Sunhee...

Jiyong knows,

It was just his hunch but I think I failed denying it

I'm sorry, I was not thinking

But then how could I deny you?

I love you.,

Sunhee-ah,,,

 

It was the message I kept reading for the whole week. The thing is, it was his first time confessing that he loves me. Seunghyun is not really a clingy person for starters. He doesn’t say I like you everyday. He never called me jagiya. He would just hug me to comfort me. And definitely he just wanted to tease me when he asked me to shave his face.

This I love you is the first I love you I heard (or saw, whatever) from him. Maybe he won’t say it ever again. So it means something special, maybe something that I will show our future children…

Erase the last part.

 

“What if Jiyong really knows? You said he started coming to Sonic.” Seunghyun sighed, but I continued staring at the phone. “Sunhee-ssi?” This time I lifted my head and looked at his anxious face. “Are you listening?”

I went to him and sat beside him, before looking at him, making sure I get an innocent look. “When will I hear your 'I love you'?”

But he did not answer for a moment and just blushed (I want to say that he’s overly cute when he blush. I am on a new mission to keep him blushing foreve). When he recovered, he shook his head and scoffed. “Is this your idea of revenge?”

“Maybe.” I shrugged and threw him a maybe face, before getting serious again. “Anyway, Yoongi oppa just messaged me. I need to go home.” When I said that, he looked at me incredulously.

“You said you'll let me sleep before you go.”

“I'm not the one who said it.” I countered.

“Sunhee-ssi.” He held my hand tighter. “Sleep here, just this night. Tell Yoongi-ssi it’s night already and you can't travel and you will just sleep here.”

“You're such a bad influence.” I shook my head but smiled. “But then I really need to go home.” I kissed his cheek and fetched for my bag.

He sighed. “I'll take you home.” He said, reached for my bag and went with me outside. When he opened his house’s main door, a man was already standing on our way.

 

It was Kwon Jiyong.

 

~-~-

 

Jiyong entered the house without waiting Seunghyun to invite him, his serious face becoming more serious every minute.

 

“So, my hunch is correct.” He said and gestured his hand on us.

“Why are you here, Jiyong?” Seunghyun's hand is suddenly tighter against mine. I looked at him as I hold his knuckles with my other hand, equally afraid and concerned.

“I want to tell you something I cannot talk over the phone.” He shrugged. From the way he acted I knew he wasn't telling the truth. “So,” he focused on me, “you're hyung's girlfriend. When will you end your relationship, this time? I'm curious.”

“Jiyong.” Seunghyun warned, releasing my hands from him. I clung to his arm this time, not letting him to go near to Jiyong.

“I don't know.” I shrugged. Seunghyun looked at me, aghast.

“Sunhee-ssi—” He's about to start, but I glared at him and mentally told him that we should just play Jiyong's game. I looked back at Jiyong.

“But one thing's for sure, I won't leave him anytime soon.” I continued as bravely as I can.

“Good, then I would just wait for your breakup, then.” Jiyong said airily. I looked acidly at him.

 

He's such a jerk!

 

“Yah, Kwon Jiyong. Let's talk.” Seunghyun said as he held my hands and started taking them off his arm. He looked at me as if saying I won't punch him, and held the small of my back. “Sunhee-ssi, can you go home alone?”

“Yeah.” I said quickly and nodded.

“You take care.” Seunghyun smiled apologetically. I nodded again and smiled, reassuring him that I'm fine. I wanted to get as far from Jiyong as possible, anyway.

“You too.” I said, then I looked at Jiyong. “I should get going.” I bowed a little and went out, not daring to look back. I trust that Seunghyun would behave. Jiyong's a jerk, that's given, but still they are friends. I don't want them to fight because of me.

 

~-~-

 

“She's a staff at Sonic, right?” Jiyong started.

 

He's already sitting at Seunghyun's kitchen when Seunghyun came back, helping himself with Romanee St. Vivant. Seunghyung reached for a wineglass and sat on the stool beside Jiyong. He poured himself half a glass of wine and drank a mouthful, letting its bitter-sweet aftertaste linger on his mouth.

 

“She's not just a staff at Sonic—”

“She's a beautiful staff of Sonic, blah blah blah.” Jiyong rolled his eyes and sipped on his wineglass. “The thing is, why did you deny her? Tell me,” he nudged Seunghyun in the arm, “are you just playing with her?”

“We're serious.” Jiyong was surprised by Seunghyun's on-point answer.

 

Jiyong didn't expect Seunghyun to be so certain. Jiyong knew all of Seunghyun's past relationships, and he knows Seunghyun wasn't at all serious with most of them. Some were serious, alright, but normally serious relationships end with the girl breaking up with them (those were the painful moments, when they try to think that a girl would be different from the others and then when you get too serious she would announce a breakup). And Seunghyun would never admit if he's serious or not.

 

“Besides,” Seunghyun continued, “I didn't deny her.”

“But you said—” Jiyong stopped. Right, Seunghyun never denied her. Jiyong just assumed he did.

“You didn't have to tell her that.”

“What?”

“That you'll wait for our breakup.” Seunghyun sighed. “You're making things worse.”

“It's already the worst, hyung.” Jiyong. “We're cursed when it comes to love. You're fully aware of that.”

“I know Sunhee is serious with me.”

“At first. They all are.” Jiyong pointed out. “How did you meet her anyway? What, you just met in that cafe and you guys started hugging?”

Seunghyun looked at him. “You saw us?”

“Yeah, well...” Jiyong shrugged. “Sorry for that.”

“We met because of Daesung.” Seunghyun said after a pause. “She and Daesung are friends, and he introduced her, and we just fell in love. Hard.” Seunghyun wanted to laugh. He doesn't know why he was talking like a drunk. Not that two glasses of wine would make him drunk. He's not that easy.

 

Seunghyun didn't even know how they fell in love. He was aware how Sunhee had hated him, and then suddenly, as if in the blink of an eye, they became close. Until they fell in love and decided to be a couple.

Seunghyun knew that someday Sunhee would break up with him because he couldn't give her his time. Still, he wanted to believe that somehow they would stay together until the end. And right now Jiyong is ruining that belief.

 

Jiyong scoffed. “So it was Daesung's fault then. I would spank him when you come crying to me.”

“That would never happen.”

“Wanna bet on that?”

“I'm not betting on the outcome of my relationship with Sunhee.” Seunghyun said with his scariest tone, hoping Jiyong would just let the issue go.

Jiyong exhaled in defeat. “You must really like her.”

“I love her, alright?”

“Yeah, sure. But do you have any plans if the fans...”

“Jiyong, please stop. I don't want to talk about that.”

“If you cannot think of a solution, then break up with her.”

“Oh please.” Seunghyun rummaged his hair and glared at Jiyong. Jiyong looked at him, considered, and raised his hand mid-air before putting it back to his lap.

“Think about it hyung. You've been through this kind of situation over and over again. I think it is time for you to learn.” Jiyong stood up. “I’ll go back.” He left Seunghyun, crazily thinking about Sunhee and their future.

 

Thinking Sunhee breaking up with him is just so hard. He wanted to cry just by imaging the ways on how Sunhee would say the magic words.

Fck Jiyong for bursting his happy bubble.

 

---