“We both agreed on this being casual Seohyun. Don’t make it sound like I’m the bad guy.” Yonghwa shouts as he turns around showing Seohyun his back.

“I know that but. . .” Seohyun didn’t continue or rather, she didn’t want to continue. She wanted to save the tiniest bit of pride that she had left. She knew that from the beginning this relationship was short term but the past few days she felt different. Like they were ready to commit. Guess she was wrong again. She knew the risk of bringing it up but did anyway. The days of happiness was bringing her more torture than satisfaction. She needed to know where they were going. And now she got her answer. An answer she expected but a part of her was hoping it wasn’t. That part of her pushed her to this moment of truth. The truth that Yonghwa just isn’t ready for commitment. For her.

“but what?! Seohyun I care for you but commitment is beyond what I can do for you.” Yonghwa grabs his guitar and exits Seohyun’s apartment, leaving her on the verge of tears. This was her expectation yet she didn’t expect how painful it’s going to feel. She felt broken like someone was trying to squeeze and pull her heart out. She fell on the floor knees first and then she gave up and just lay down the floor. The coldness of the wood didn’t bother her when usually it would. She liked the coldness that somewhat helped her feel numb. It was something that helped her take her mind elsewhere other than what just happened. However, it somehow always gets back to a memory with Yonghwa. That’s when she knew. . . Yonghwa is her world, or rather, WAS her world. Anywhere she looked reminded her of him. She just chuckled at how miserable she must look right now. She stayed crying on her wooden floor until she tired herself out and fell asleep.

Seohyun woke up feeling like doing nothing all day. Of course, that won’t happen with her busy schedule. She got herself up from the floor and headed to the bathroom to take a shower. A really cold one. She wanted and needed to wake herself up. After, she went to the parking lot knowing her manager would be there to take her wherever she’s scheduled to go. She breaths in and out to prepare herself to act normal. ‘Like nothing ever happened’ she repeated in her head. She brought her best smile and went inside the van. Seohyun noticed the flowers on her seat right away and she just stared for a few minutes.

“It’s from Yonghwa. There’s even a card. Don’t tell me it’s your anniversary already.” Her manager teases which did not amuse Seohyun.

“I won’t tell you it’s our anniversary already,” Seohyun says with sarcasm in her tone. Her manager just rolled his eyes and told the driver to go. He’s used to Seohyun being sarcastic. He really loves the innocent Seohyun from before but the Seohyun now, he’s got to admit, is more likable and relatable. He knew Seohyun was hiding another layer of her but she wouldn’t show it because of her innocent image. He’s just glad she's finally loosening up a bit.

Seohyun sat the flowers on her lap and put her seatbelt on. She grabs the card and puts the flowers on the seat behind her. She wasn’t much of a flower girl anyway. She preferred gestures like a kiss or a hug or better, write a song about her. Maybe that’s why she’s madly in love with him. Though she knows from last night, he might not be that into her. She opens the card and read it word by word.

“I’m sorry about last night. Meet me at my place when you’re free. I’ll be waiting. -JYH”

Seohyun’s first thought was ‘how dare he after what he said last night.’ But then her heart was telling her to go with the hopes of fixing it with him. She didn’t want to lose him after all. ‘I’m okay even if it’s just casual as long as I can be with him’ she thought.

Seohyun ended later than she expected. She glances at her phone and sees that it’s already 2:56 am. She told her manager to go straight to Yonghwa’s but now, she’s wondering if she should even go.

“What if he’s sleeping already?” she whispers to herself.

“What was that?” her manager asks but he’s too sleepy to even care. He didn’t even notice that Seohyun didn’t answer his question. She just stared at her phone hoping to get to Yonghwa’s as soon as possible.

*ding dong*

That was Seohyun’s second attempt. She got impatient and knocked on the wooden door instead.

*knock knock knock*

No answer.

“Maybe he’s sleeping already?” Her manager asks but Seohyun just kept knocking. After all the courage she accumulated throughout the day just to come here, she isn’t about to give up now. Yeah, she could just go tomorrow but she thinks tomorrow would be too late. And what if Yonghwa thought, she’s actually breaking up with him? That would break her heart even more. As Seohyun’s knuckles started to hurt from knocking too much, she stops to take a look at it. It’s red and it is now painful.

“Maybe he is. Let’s go.” Seohyun says. She’ll just explain it tomorrow.