Final.

Song – Meant For Me by Lewis Watson

Your eyes, they are a puzzle
That I try my best to read
I'll stay up all night to talk it out and break the silence
'Till I find your missing piece

Wendy sighs, looking at the drinks in front of her and still not believing just how painful heartbreak felt. She found it odd, how persistent the pain was. It was maddening and never left the inside of her chest. Every breath she took, every passing moment, the discomfort in her chest would only grow as her thoughts wandered to how fast things could change. She furrowed her eyebrows as she thought about how just months ago, she was the reason behind the smile of the most beautiful girl she had ever met. Now, as Wendy sat down in front of several drinks all for herself, she knew that she’d have to leave that as a memory.

“Who even gets all of these at once?” Wendy mumbled to herself as she stared at the expresso, chocolate milkshake and vanilla latte in front of her. “Why am I even back here?” Wendy took a quick glance around the café she was sitting in. It was hard on her, sitting in the very place that Seulgi first took her to. Wendy knew she had to let go and she knew that if she didn’t, the constant thoughts of her and Seulgi and what happened would never cease. She knew she couldn’t drive herself crazy like that.

But she couldn’t help herself.

Seulgi loved her, genuinely loved her,and Wendy threw that away when she made the choice to run away out of fear. Her and Seulgi went from late nights that were peaceful where everything seemed so perfect, like they were out of heartbreak’s reach, like nothing could hurt them to nights filled with silent tears and empty hearts. Before, Seulgi would wrap her arms around Wendy’s frame and Wendy would feel warm and safe because she knew Seulgi loved her. Wendy had found someone she could trust, someone she would risk it all for. She asked herself how she could let it happen. She asked herself how she could let go of all the times she’d say “I love you” and the full laughter and the warm smiles and the looks of reassurance. Wendy asked herself how she could let it all go.

And now, Seulgi was happilymarried for a week now and Wendy didn’t have the strength to go onto her phone and look at all the photos that were bound to pop up. She’d see Seulgi happy and think of how the latter would probably look back and remember her without the fondness Wendy remembered from her. And it hurt thinking of all the different ways Seulgi would probably look back at their time together and feel anger rise inside her as she’d say “She hurt me”.

Wendy couldn’t comprehend what she felt. Her mind raced to jump from one happy memory to the next, as if to mock her and say “It’s all gone, she’s gone”. She was driving herself insane and she couldn’t get rid of all the noise in her head. She tried to tell herself that Seulgi was happy now and if she wasn’t, she’d become happy.

Seulgi would forget about her and move on. She had someone else to take road trips with and they’d hold her close and make her smile the way she used to. Seulgi had someone else to slow dance with and they’d have a special song of their own that would remind Seulgi of all the good memories she’d share with them and not Wendy. She had someone else to draw and paint and create for. Seulgi wouldn’t need the sound of Wendy’s voice as the latter would sing to her with a melody strummed on the guitar just for her. Seulgi wouldn’t fall for her anymore, her smile so bright that Wendy would wonder if anything else in the world could be as beautiful. Seulgi wouldn’t love her anymore.

Wendy was in love, so madly and deeply in love with Seulgi who was married and doing her best to move on with someone new, burying all the pain Wendy made her feel. Wendy was so hopelessly in love with Seulgi, the very girl she hurt beyond words. Wendy was in love—

“You’re going to drink all of that?

Then you go

And say that you're not perfect

But you're gold

Wendy shot up to look at who interrupted her train of thought only to have left hanging agape.

“…Seulgi”

Wendy could only follow Seulgi with her eyes, still in shock, as the latter sat down across from her. Seulgi seemed awfully calm as she reached for Wendy’s chocolate milkshake and took a sip for herself, “Didn’t you tell me you were going to be back in Canada by now?”

Wendy still couldn’t believe her eyes.

“You shouldn’t be so shocked to see me here, Seungwan” the use of her real name tore Wendy’s heart apart, “This ismy favourite café” Seulgi offered her a light smile, one that didn’t reach her ears and Wendy could tell that it was taking a toll on Seulgi to try and hold herself together.

“I lied” was all Wendy could muster back to her. She took a deep breath and looked up at Seulgi’s eyes. She looked so worn out. “I didn’t want to go to your wedding, I’m sorry, I just couldn’t face—”

“It’s okay, me too” Seulgi sighed as she downed the last bit of chocolate milkshake. “That’s why I didn’t go either”.

And even on your darkest days you glow
You'll never have to do this on your own
Because you're not alone

Wendy began to feel her heart race a million miles a minute. She couldn’t have misheard her. This had to be a misunderstanding. After everything that has happened between them, Wendy knew that Seulgi couldn’t have been implying what she so desperately wished for. Surely, Seulgi was going to say something along the lines of a delayed wedding or just wanting to be alone for the next while. Seulgi was here to tell her off, release her anger, tell Wendy about how she broke her heart. There was no way Wendy would hear the words she had missed so much.

“I love you, Wendy”.

---

Now we're in the right place
Now we're in the right time
And I know we've made a lot of mistake
Got a lot of things right

“I’m sorry” Wendy mumbled as she felt Seulgi sat down beside her.

When Seulgi saw the blank expression on Wendy’s face back in the café, she knew that Wendy had to get some air. Wendy needed to calm down, so Seulgi offered to take her to a quieter place. Luckily, the shorter girl was able to recognize that in order to continue the conversation Seulgi started with her, she’d need help in cleari