Lesson 1

Jessica Jung

August 12, 2008

“I don’t give a about what you think!”

A dry and crack unrecognizable scream came out from me. I still remembered the tears of disappointment and shock in their eyes. The woman held her dishearten eyes on mines, but it didn’t last long. She dropped to the floor and hit herself on the chest. She had already started to mourn for the death of her “good” daughter: the old me. The man pulled his eyebrows together and closed his eyes to avoid my hateful stares.

“You were never here anyways.”

I clenched my hand into a fist. Memories of how me and my dead brother struggle to keep this broken home together rushed me. Every piece of them reminds me of Youngji, my brother. They didn’t cry like this when my brother was dying from a fatal accident. Why now then? Why do they care all of a sudden?

“How can you do this?” The woman scream from her lungs. “Jessica, you can’t go out from now on.”

The man pointed his crooked finger at the woman, “It’s all your fault. I told you! All you know is how to gamble. What else can you do?”

The woman roared and stretched the veins on her neck. She close her eyes and ear-striking words came out.

“What you think you did for her? GREAT. Now her pregnancy is my fault. Did I let her out to sleep with douchebags?” She raised her voice. He competed against her. Not a word was heard from both of them, all there is noises.

“Shut up! Just shut the hell up! All you guys know how to do is argue. ” I extend the handle of my dark suitcase. “I didn’t plan to tell none of you. I am here to move out.”

“Don’t you dare to walk out!” The woman yelled.

“Why aren’t you like this when Youngji passed away?”

The sudden drop of silence tensed the atmosphere in the house. My heart ached at the wordlessness. I slow my steps by the door.

“Youngji said he loves the two of you.”

Then I left that place forever.

August 26, 2008

For the past weeks, I spent it with my boyfriend, the father of my child. His name is Kris. Kris came from a wealth family. He can buy a mansion with a push of a finger. Money was never a problem, until he moved out with me. We hid it from his parents and mines. Because of young love, we didn’t believe in anything anyone said. Everything was on our own.

We prayed to be a good parent. He was eighteen, and I was seventeen. The day his eyes met mines in the club, I knew he would be the one. Our relationship was perfect. The both of us were in love. Whispering the word “love you” to each other everyday is love.

Love is the solution to everything.

I was young and reckless.

September 5, 2008

After a few more weeks, my heart was torn out from my chest and was stomp it in front of me. I was crying transparent tears on the outside, but bleeding on the inside.

“I gave up all these for you.” Kris turned his volume up. “Now you are yelling at me just because I talked to another girl?”

“You were flirting with her.” I stood up from the sofa that we just bought last week. The plastic was still on seat.

“I wasn’t.”

“She touched you. Why didn’t you move the back?”

“What the hell is wrong with you? I loved you. What part of that you can’t understand? , you are so insecure.”

“You weren’t like that before we went on bed!” I shuffled my blond hair into a mess. “? I carrying your damn child.”

“I never wanted the child. Stop chaining me.”

Kris picked up his keys and stormed out the house. He never came back that night. I was left enraged with myself that night, because it reminds me of my parents.

Little did I know being angry is a deadly thing. My child left me that day. The next day I built a small funeral for him near the end of a bridge.  

I pray and pray for God’s forgiveness or to take me with him. The tears dried by the strong wind, but new ones would fall again. Every bow I take, a drop would hit the soil.  When I raised for the last time, the sky cried with me. It’s tears washed me from head to toe. I stared at my unborn child’s grave. Tears didn’t fall anymore.

Crying are for the weak.

I went to search for a new beginning.

June 24, 2014 -current

“Ms. Jung.” A man in black suit took my hand as I step out the car. “Thank you for coming to our hotel.” I fixed the big coat hanging on my shoulder.

“What time is it?”

“12 p.m.” The man checked his clock.

I scanned the outside view of the hotel with my sharp eyes. The decoration is not as thoughtful as they say in the review. Things were organized but lack of boldness and transparency to capture the customer’s view. I slips on my sunglasses and hold my hand out.

Soon a ipad would reach my hand. I walked up the door and started my review on the current place.

“How do you like it CEO?” My accompany asked as we stroll down the grandhall. I believe his name is Chanyeol. He was sent by the sales department to go with me on this hotel tour in America.

“Three word. Styleless, boring and .”

His big eyes grew wider at my last word, but have learned to kept his own comment. He zipped his lips for the rest of the day.

The managers escorted me to a luxury room. They faces pasted with fake smile which look like they are biting on chopsticks. I told them to relax their cheeks after I enter my room. As soon as I shut the doors, I heard them started their group chat about me. It didn’t bother me.

I pulled a hoodie out from my suitcase. With the other hand, I the back of dress. Comfortably, I slip myself into a hoodie and short jeans. I stood in front of a mirror and tie my brown hair into a ponytail. I clean my face with makeup remover and put on a framed glasses.

“Let’s get working. Ssica.”

My reflection smiled back at me.

“Ya! What part don’t you understand!” As soon as the elevator door slide open, the boy flew towards the wall. The right corner of his mouth ripped and covered with blood. His white and black uniform covered with shoe prints and dirt. A man in black hoodie steps in and cornered the frighten boy. One of them pull the boy’s collar and lift him from the ground.

“Ya!” I shout. All their eyes turn to me in shock. “Put him down.” I thicken my voice.

“Who the are you? Highschool girl?” The man took a step closer to me. I had completely forgot I am on my casual wear right now.

I strike my feet right up between his legs. Probably had cause enough damage for the man to experience the greatest pain. Without a thought, I pressed all the buttons on the elevator and pull the boy out the door. The man kneeling on the ground one hand against his crotch and the other reach for the closing door. We run until we got out the hotel.

“Thank you.” I remember the first word he said when our eyes met for the first time. This boy’s eyes filled with innocency. For a second, I thought I was looking into a sheep’s eyes. He blinked twice and broke our eye contact by moving his pupil to the right.  The brown iris of his eyes are clearer than crystals. His arched nose twitched twice as he sniff to check for a nosebleed.

“What’s your name?” I heard myself asked.

Those eyes magically moved back to me, “Luhan. Luhan Xi.” Our eyes locked again.

Surprisingly, I looked down. “Your lips are bleeding.” I pointed out.

He wipe his arm against the blood. It smeared over the white complexion of his skin. His fingers gently moved across the injury on the corner of his mouth.

“I will get someone to bring you an aid.” I stood up.

“Wait.” He grabbed my wrist, but let go of it right away. “It’s fine. I don’t want to go back in.” He smiled in pain.

“Do you need anything then?”

“No. Thank you.”

I nodded without an expression. “Take care then.”  As I turned away, I heard his shoe rubbed against the ground a few time and stomped against the ground.

“Hold on.” He shouted.

I spin back with my eyebrow arched.

He ran towards me. “What’s your name?”

“Jessica.” I never told anyone my name when I was doing a secret evaluation around the hotels, but I could be an exception. “Jessica Jung.”

“I own you a thank you. I can pay you back with a small wish.” He took the phone in my hand without asking. I was so in shock that my reflexes were about to slap across his face. With a few second, he punched in a line of numbers and saved it for me. Handing back my phone, the boy waved goodbye to me and ran down the street.

I stared at the bright screen of my phone.

It printed, “One wish genie.”