The rest of the weekend passed by for Kyungsoo in the way that it usually did:  he get reprimanded by his mom for not calling or texting her about spending the night at Kai’s, did some homework, and hung out with the two idiots, catching each other up on their lives as they mutilated each other by way of video games.

Monday morning in school, as Jongdae and Kyungsoo were performing their daily ritual, Baekhyun once again joined them, Kai at his heels.  As the two of them approached, Kai smiled timidly at Kyungsoo, who reciprocated the action, causing Jongdae to look back and forth between the two in blatant confusion.

Kai didn’t say anything as Baekhyun finished asking Jongdae if he had an extra pair of sneakers he could borrow for gym class later that day (he did by the way, Jongdae was way too gung ho about said class).  The two of them left shortly thereafter, and Jongdae, ever curious, turned to Kyungsoo.

“What was that?”

“What was what?” Kyungsoo asked he dug out his biology homework for Jongdae.

“Kai smiled at you and you smiled back.  Has the world suddenly turned upside down?  Will we begin walking on our hands and talking through our asses?  Will monkeys surpass us as the most intelligent lifeform?”

“Jongdae, you once again need to calm your .  We’re just trying to get along for the sake of our project.  I told you Saturday that he apologized for being such a dickwad to me.”

“Yeah, but Kyungsoo, that didn’t just seem like a casual hello between strangers, that seemed almost friendly.”

“Jongdae, isn’t it a good thing that we’re getting along; that he’s no longer calling me a every chance he gets?” Kyungsoo implored earnestly.

“Yeah, it is.  I’m sorry if I sound so appalled, I just don’t trust him Soo, and I don’t think you should either.  This is the same person that made your life a living hell ever since you came out of the closet.  And don’t even try to tell me that it didn’t affect you, Kyungsoo I’ve been your best friend since Kindergarten, if I didn’t know how you were feeling without you telling me, I’d be a ty excuse for a best friend.”

“Don’t worry Dae, I don’t trust him.”

“No, but you want to, and that’s what worries me.”

“As long as I have you, I don’t care what anybody does to me.”

Jongdae just sighed and wrapped Kyungsoo into his arms.  “But you should.”

They parted ways, and by the time they saw each other again in chorus, Jongdae was back to his normal self, and it was as if the conversation in the hallway had never happened.  Well, it would be if Kyungsoo didn’t keep catching Jongdae throwing him slightly worried glances when he thought he wasn’t looking.

In English later, they once again had normal class time after the teacher announced that they would only be given one more day to work on their projects in class, and after that they were going to have to find time outside to finish up.

When the period ended, Kyungsoo stood up and was about to make his way to the door when Kai approached him.

“Hi” Kai smiled at him shyly.

“Hey, what’s up?”

Kai looked at his feet as the two of them went out the door.  “We’re both going the same place, right?  It just makes sense that we walk there together, don’t you think?”

“Sure, I guess.  Though I’m not going to lie, it feels kinda weird.”

"Ha, yeah, it does,” Kai’s agreement, prefaced by a chuckle, served to break the ice between them.  The rest of the walk to class was in silence, but it was a comfortable silence of two almost-friends.

They may have walked to class together, but they still changed in their normal spots, Kyungsoo in the front row of lockers with Jongdae, and Kai in the back with Baekhyun.  Truthfully, Kyungsoo hoped it remained that way indefinitely.  He may not particularly like Kai, but he couldn’t disagree with the fact he had a hot bod, something that Kyungsoo reasoned he did not need to be seeing practically every time he was about to go exercise.

When they all shuffled into the gym, the teacher immediately instructed them to partner up and go outside, they were going to play tennis today.  Unlike last gym class’s partner activity, Kyungsoo got to be with the partner of his choice, Jongdae, and was not manipulated into pairing up with Kai.

That isn’t to say Kyungsoo was in the clear.  Baekhyun and Kai decided to partner up together and face off against Kyungsoo and Jongdae.

“Looks like it’s team KB against team JK today!”  Baekhyun yelled across the court as they prepared to start battle.

“Why do I have such competitive friends?” Kyungsoo bemoaned his misfortune as Jongdae began stretching and flexing his guns in response to Baekhyun’s challenge.

The whistle blew for them to begin playing, and in that gym period was played the most heated match of tennis the school had ever seen.  All four boys were going hard at it, running from place to place and even lunging for the ball if the situation required it.  But despite the many profanities that slipped from their mouths as they played, all four boys ended the match with giant grins plastered to their faces.

“I ing hate you guys,” Kyungsoo panted out, sweat pouring down his face as they finished their competition.

“But it’s good for you Soo Soo!” Jongdae exclaimed, flinging his arm around his shoulders.

“ off Jongdae!” But despite his apparent annoyance, Kyungsoo wrapped his arm around Jongdae’s waist and leaned his head against the slightly taller boy’s shoulder.

“So who won?” Kai asked, looking Kyungsoo and Jongdae up and down, with what emotion, Kyungsoo couldn’t tell.

“Was anybody actually keeping score?” Baekhyun asked as he pulled his sweat-soaked t-shirt off his body.

“I certainly wasn’t,” Kyungsoo laughed as Jongdae extricated himself from him to run away from Baekhyun’s shirt-turned-whip.

As the two of them ran off towards the locker room, alternately laughing and squealing in pain, Kai remarked to Kyungsoo, “You know, your smile is shaped a little bit like a heart.”

“What?” Kyungsoo immediately deadpanned, making sure to wipe the smile in question off of his face.

“Yeah, it’s kind of cool.  I’ve never seen anybody with a smile like that, you should show it off more often.”

With that parting remark, Kai pulled ahead on the way back to the locker room, and Kyungsoo tried to stop the inexplicable pounding of his chest as he made his way over towards Jongdae to change into less disgusting clothing.

“Kyungsoo, are you okay? You look kind of flushed still, do you need to go to the nurse?  I keep telling you you need to work out more often.”

“I’m fine Jongdae, exercise and I just don’t get along is all,” Kyungsoo responded, trying not to flush even more brightly.

“Whatever you say. Hey! I gotta split early, mom’s picking me up right after school.  I have a dentist appointment to check up on these pearly-whites!” Jongdae flashed Kyungsoo his mega-watt smile and skipped out the door.

“Such a tool,” Kyungsoo laughed under his breath.

“Who is?” Baekhyun asked as he and Kai joined Kyungsoo near the door to wait for the bell to ring.

“Jongdae.”

“Ah, I see, say no more,” Baekhyun laughed at what Kyungsoo had to say.

“Hey Kyungsoo, are we working on our project tonight?” Baekhyun looked between the two of them, a knowing smile on his face.

“Sure, just, let me go home and shower first, I detest being sweaty.  And Baekhyun, I have no idea what that look is about, but it’s freaking me the hell out and I would be much obliged if you would change it into something a little less disturbing, you look like that creep, Chanyeol.”

“He is not creepy, he’s just rather…special.”

Kai snorted in response, but before Baekhyun could turn on him, the bell rang and both he and Kyungsoo were out the door.

When Kyungsoo got home, he hopped in the shower right away, making sure to take his time enjoying the sensation of once again becoming clean.  When he was done, he dressed in a simple t-shirt and jeans, and left for Kai’s house, hair still damp, but no longer dripping.

When he rang the doorbell this time, he was answered by Kai instead of his mother.  Kai, seeming to understand Kyungsoo’s dazed look, merely said, “She had a business meeting that ran late, she won’t be home until later.”

Kyungsoo nodded his head in understanding and slipped his shoes off to come into the house.  The two of them then walked into Kai’s room, and it was amazing how quickly they slipped into their routine of working.

An hour later, they had done all it was they could do for the day.  Kyungsoo packed up his laptop and made as if to leave, but Kai interjected, “Aren’t you staying for dinner?”

“Oh, well, I didn’t think I was since we got done so early.”

“It’s just, uh, my mom will be disappointed that you came over without her getting a chance to feed you.  She thinks you’re too thin.”

“Tell your mom thanks, but I actually really ought to drop a few pounds,” Kyungsoo rubbed his belly for emphasis. “Jongdae’s always saying I oughtta start working out or something.”

“I don’t think you do, you’re perfect.”  Kyungsoo blushed furiously and couldn’t even attempt to control it.

“I mean, I, ah, uhm.  You’re at a perfect weight! There’s no need to lose any, it would be unhealthy if you did!” Kai stammered out.

“Oh, uh, thanks I guess?”

“Hey, let’s go for a walk, okay?”

“I thought you just said I didn’t need to lose any weight?”

“I just meant to pass the time until dinner.”

They were both in more comfortable territory now.  Kyungsoo agreed to the walk and soon found himself meandering along the path to the same park where he and SoFo had nailed Jongdae with a Frisbee.

When they got there, Kyungsoo looked around to see they were surrounded by couples.  He both loved and hated seeing couples being cute together.  To see so much happiness and love on the faces of the people together warmed his heart and made him unreasonably happy for them.  It also had a tendency to make him feel horribly lonely.  He knew that was a ridiculous feeling to have considering he was only a high school student with his whole life ahead of him to find love, and he had many people that cared about him and supported him.  But hidden amongst these more rational thoughts was nestled the yearning to be held and kissed, coupled with a fear that he was going to die bitter and alone, with nothing but his seven dogs and his parrot that he taught to say ‘I love you,’ for company.

“Kyungsoo?” Kai said his name, and Kyungsoo was surprised to hear how sharp it sounded.

“What’s wrong?”

“There’s nothing wrong!” Kai snapped back.

“Woah, hey, you said my name first, I thought you wanted to say something.  And I thought we had moved past this whole ‘be a to Kyungsoo’ chapter of your life.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay, just tell me what’s on your mind instead of getting unreasonably angry at me, okay?”

Kai relaxed noticeably and rubbed the nape of his neck, “Yeah, okay.”

“Now, what is it you wanted to ask me?”

“It’s nothing.”

“If you say so…” Kyungsoo trailed off.

A few minutes passed, and Kyungsoo realized Kai wasn’t going to ask whatever was on his mind.  Kyungsoo, while curious about what Kai had been going to say, decided to drop the topic, something he wasn’t used to doing as Jongdae always told him everything, no censor.  He even once told Kyungsoo about the dream he had had where he slept with Kyungsoo’s mom. In graphic detail. Kyungsoo still hadn’t gotten that image out of his mind, and Jongdae still had a scar from where Kyungsoo had thrown his book at him in horror.

He shivered at the memory as he and Kai sat next to each other on a bench.

“Are you cold?” Kai asked, beginning to take off his sweater.

“No, thanks, I’m fine.  I was just remembering something Jongdae told me once and I was struck with chills of disgust and horror.”

“You and Jongdae are pretty close, right?”

“Yeah, I mean, he’s been my best friend since Kindergarten when he accidently sat on my pet turtle and almost killed it.  That boy has an unreasonably large rear-end.”

“Do you like him?”

“Yeah, of course I like him, didn’t I just say we’ve been friends since Kindergarten?”

“No, I mean like like him.”  Kai turned his head so he was looking at an oblivious Kyungsoo who continued to watch the people around them.

“Heavens no, I know too much about him.  Plus, he’s really more of a brother than anything.”

“Being a brother doesn’t always mean anything.”

“What do you mean?” And now Kyungsoo was looking at Kai too.

“Nothing,” Kai turned his head away.  Now it was his turn to watch the people laugh and play in the park.  “You two seem pretty comfortable touching each other, don’t you think? Maybe a little too comfortable.”

“Kai, I have no idea what you’re going on about, but Jongdae and I have been friends for thirteen years, if we weren’t comfortable touching each other, I would seriously have to reconsider our friendship.  What is this about?”

“I saw him hug you earlier in the hallway.  And he always stands really close to you when you’re together.”

“Okay, I don’t know why I feel like I need to explain this, but I do, and I will.  First of all, Jongdae is really touchy-feely, and I mean extremely so.  He has no concept of personal space.  The first time he met Baekhyun, he hugged him so tight I thought his eyes were going to pop out, and then he kissed him on the forehead saying that he was so glad his ‘little Soo Soo had a new friend!’

“Secondly, he is straight us a flagpole, to use what is probably not the right expression.  At least twice a day I get to hear about how badly he wants to bang Scarlett Johansson, and all the things he would do to her in bed.

“And as for the hug, which I definitely shouldn’t have to explain to you; he was worried about me.”

“He calls you Soo Soo! If that’s not a pet name, I don’t know what is.  And why should he be worried about you?”

“Okay, well if you’re concerned about his pet name for me, you should look to Baekhyun too, who repeatedly calls me ‘Kyunggie,’ despite the many beatings I’ve given him for it.

“And Jongdae was worried about me spending time with you.  I don’t know if you’ve forgotten or what, but you used to bully me mercilessly.  Jongdae, as my best friend, is worried that you’re just going to hurt me more if I spend so much time with you.

“What is this all about anyway?  Why are you getting on Jongdae’s case about behaving as a friend towards me?”

“I’m sorry, I guess I’m just jealous.  You two are so close, and I don’t have anyone like that.  I can’t even touch people, for God’s sake! How am I supposed to get close to anybody?”

“Kai.” Kai continued to stare out into space.

“Kai, look at me.”  He did, turning his head just enough that he could see Kyungsoo out of the corner of his eye without actually making eye contact.

“I don’t know why you have such a difficult time with touching, and I know that I might never, but I can tell you this: you have to actually try to get past whatever it is that’s blocking you.  And I don’t mean telling yourself that you are, I mean actually trying to get better.”

“I don’t know how to do that Kyungsoo.”

“Do you want me to tell you?”

Kai just nodded his head once in response.

“You have to make an effort to touch people.  You need to be the one to initiate contact.  That puts you in control, and as it seems to be control that this is stemming from, I think this will be the best way.  Just start with little touches, like brushing shoulders, or sitting close enough to someone that you’re touching, just ever so slightly, and I really think you’ll be able to make progress.”

“Will you – will you help me?”

Kyungsoo looked at him, really trying to read what his eyes were saying, but finding himself unable to decode their secret.

“Why me?  Why not Baekhyun, or somebody you’re close with?”

“I couldn’t – after all this time, I couldn’t just start touching him.  He would think that it’s okay to touch me too, and I’m not ready for that.”

“Why don’t you talk to him about it first?”

“Kyungsoo, you’re not my friend, but for some reason you’re able to get me to say things I haven’t ever told anyone else.  And despite how poorly I’ve always treated you, you have never told anyone the things I say and aired my dirty laundry to the world.  I don’t know why, but I just can’t say these things to Baekhyun.  He’s my friend and all, but I’m just not ready to tell anybody how I feel.”

“Thank you.”

At Kyungsoo’s candid response, Kai turned his head around, and now they were both staring at each other, searching for a reason that their hatred for each other had somehow turned into being each other’s confidantes.

Kai looked away first, uncomfortable at the close proximity and the prolonged eye contact.

“Well, ehem, we should probably go, I bet mom’s almost ready with dinner.”

“Okay.” Kyungsoo agreed, unwilling to end the conversation there, but knowing he had no choice.

As they stood up, Kai reached out hesitantly, and placed his hand on Kyungsoo’s elbow to help him up.  His hand was shaking the whole time, and as soon as Kyungsoo was fully upright, he let go right away, but Kyungsoo knew how much that took for him to do, and smiled brilliantly at him.