We finally left the dorm and started walking home. Taemin looked happy, but me on the other hand, was nervous. Nervous and guilty. I will need to confess this to Taemin eventually. If not, he'll find out somehow. It's better if he heard it from me now rather than from anyone else. 

"So did you like it?" Those words just reminded me of Onew when he was kissing me down my neck on the couch. "Meeting them?" he noticed that there was something wrong so he asked me.

"I'm fine, just a bit drifted off in my thoughts." I assured with a weak smile on my face. He didn't buy those words and stopped me in the middle of the road. He put both of his hands on my sholders and looked at me worried.

"I'm serious. What's wrong?" I felt like bursting into tears when he looked so conserned. How could I do this to him? For everything that he's done, this is how I repay him. I mean, he saved me multiple times, cared for me, protected me, and most importantly, was a great friend. And how do I repay him? By cheating on him with his friend.

Then again, I didn't want to kiss Onew. He kissed me. He was forcing himself on to me when I didn't want to. I tried pushing him away but he was too strong. That is true. However, I had a chance to deny him but I didn't. That's what I regret. I will have to tell him this a different day. I don't want to ruin his mood. I want him to be happy.

"Nothing! Really, it's fine! There is absolutely nothing wrong!" I assured him again, this time raising my voice slightly. I looked down, nearly begining to cry but just managed to hold my tears back. 

"Clearly there is because your crying!" I just noticed that there was a tear coming down my cheek. I didn't even realize. Will I tell him now? I can't. 

I freed myself from his hands and started running home. I could hear him shout my name but I couldn't stop. I was too ashamed to even show my face to him. I heard him run after me and he eventually catched up. I was a few feet away from my house when he suddenly stopped me by pulling on my hand.

"Why did you run away from me?" He asked loudly. He cupped my face into his hands and held me close. He wanted to kiss me but i pulled away.

"I, can't! I'm sorry!" I said to him in a shaky voice with streams of tears travelling down my face. I ran inside my house leaving Taemin standing in confusion and worry.

I didn't mean to... I'm sorry....

It's midnight now, and I decided to face up to Taemin. I texted him if he could meet me at the park. He agreed and we are scheduled to meet in 20 minutes. I had been crying for an hour and my makeup was horrible. I cleaned it off but my eyes still looked swollen. When I saw Taemin sitting on a bench where he once attempted to kiss me, I took a deep breath and walked over to him. As he saw me he stood up from the bench, stardled.

"Hey!" He said cheerfully. I replied back in a dim voice, 

"Hi...."

"So you wanted to talk to me? And about earlier, what happened?" 

"This is what I came to talk to you about..." I gently took hold of his hand and pulled him down to sit down on the bench with me. 

"When we were at the dorm, you and the other guys left me and Onew alone, and something happened..."

"What?" He clulesly said. He really had no idea what I was on about.

"Well, he kissed me..." I didn't even get to finnish my sentence. As Taemin heard those words he stood up and shouted,

"He WHAT? And you LET him?" 

"Let me finnish!"

"Oh I think I've heard enough!" He shouted again, this time more furious.

"I tried telling him to stop but he wouldnt listen!" I shouted back. He seemed to calm down and sat back down on the bench. "I tried pushing him away but he was too strong! He even picked me up and dropped me on the couch," I could see that Taemin was really consentrating on what I was saying. "Then he got on top of me and kissed me down my neck. I tried telling him to stop but he wouldnt listen. He even tried ing my blouse! But he then realized you would be coming back soon, so he got off of me."

"Did you try to run? Did you have a go at him?"

"I was too shocked! Anyway, he then asked me if I liked it, and then he said 'until next time' so he's planning to meet with me again to do it for real."

"What did you say when he asked you if you liked it?" His voice was cold now.

"Well, I, I didn't say anything."

"So you liked it? You liked it didn't you?" He asked harshly and loudly. He got me there. I did like it. I didn't want to like it though. I was silent.

He stood up and looked away from me. "I can't believe this..." I tried comforting him by touching his arm slightly but he pulled away. "Stay away from me." He said in an even colder voice that what he had preveously. "I can't believe that you would do this to me. And I can't believe Onew would do this to me eather! I'm gonna get that son of a ..." He started running off. I shouted for him to stop but he wouldn't listen. He kept running so I had no choice but to run after him. 

As I finally got to the dorm, I opened the door and saw Taemin and Onew fighting. All of them turned to me as I entered except Taemin. He was still looking at Onew with an angry expression on his face.

I don't want them to fight but there's nothing I can do anymore, what was planned to be settled now will be settled now.