I sit on the couch for hours. I pretended to fall asleep just so Kris would go to sleep. Even though I’m this drunk I can’t sleep. My mind keeps on racing. The urge to go out keeps getting bigger. I’m relapsing aren’t I? I scroll through the messages Chanyeol left me. He really seems worried… Isn’t he a little too late for that? Why apologize about something, if you knew what you were doing, but didn’t care at the time? Why should I be the only one that was getting hurt like this? They’re all right, I shouldn’t stay here anymore. I should go away until I forget about my feelings for him.

I stumble off of the couch and out of the apartment. In a daze I walk back to my apartment. I stop in front of my door, and look over at Chanyeol’s place. Loud voices were coming from his place. It sounded like he was having an argument with that woman. Suddenly his door is ripped open and she storms out of the place, slamming the door behind her. The moment she notices me she makes a beeline for me. She opens to spit an insult at me, but before she can even think about what to say. I lift my fist and slam it into her face.

“Oops, did I hurt you?” I mock

She cries out in pain, her nose starting to bleed. Maybe I should feel bad? Or maybe I should keep on punching her? I look at her in thought. I lift my foot and give her one good kick in the stomach. That’s all I need. With a smirk I turn from her and walk into my apartment. Now that I’ve settled everything, I should start packing.

My thumb slides over the photo of the five of us. I should tell them I’m leaving… but if I see them now, I might change my mind… There’s a knock on my door and I start to walk toward it when I hear Chanyeol’s voice. I want to see him so badly… but if I do, I won’t be able to go. I can’t see him as long as I’m feeling like this.

“Ally, please open up!” He pleads, his voice filled with desperation.

I stand still, and listen to his pleading. Waiting for him to give up.

“I’ll stay here all night if I have to” He threatens.

Obviously he wasn’t used to not having his way with me. I turn around and start packing again, I toss the photo onto my bed. I’m forgetting about this entire place. I pull my phone out of my jacket as it starts to ring. A private number… who could it be?

“Didn’t think I’d be able to track you down did you?” A cruel voice sneers through the phone.

The blood freezes in my veins. I never thought I’d have to hear this voice again. His voice.

“I’m not coming home” I whisper.

“Do you think I’ll allow you to get away?”

“Please… I can’t live there anymore” I beg.

Of all the times, why now? I can’t go back, that place isn’t my home. It never was after my father left and my mother remarried…

I always knew my mother was a cruel woman, but allowing my step-dad to do this to me, wasn’t she taking it too far? Even if I screwed up, she can’t possibly be willing to torture me like this… How can she even say that she loves him?

“I’ll organize everything. Be at the airport in 10 minutes. This is your last chance. If you don’t show up, I’ll come and get you myself.”

And just like that he ends the call. There is nothing I can do. There’s no way I can refuse him. I can’t let him meet the guys… he’ll destroy their lives. When I get home, I’ll forget about everything. I’ll probably go back to who I was too… and get myself in trouble again. But then again, being locked up in prison is far better than being with him. Anywhere else would be better than there. I take my bags and shuffle toward the front door. Now how do I get rid of Chanyeol? How do I get away from him before he talks me out of it? I my breath in and open my door. Annoyed I notice that Chanyeol was now leaning against the wall opposite my door. He really wasn’t kidding when he said he’d wait for me. He notices my bags and takes a step forward.

“What’s with that?”

I keep walking, now heading down the stairs.

“Hey! Stop! Just look at me!” He yells, grabbing my arm.

He spins me around to face him. My eyes meet his and I feel my heart waver. And just like that I slap him.

“I’m through with you”

He stares at me in shock. His face full of hurt.

“Ally, I-“

I slap him again.

“Don’t ever talk to me again. You two deserve each other. Tell the guys I don’t want to hear from them either. I hated seeing your faces more than you’ll ever know”

His hand locks around my wrist.

“Don’t say that. If you’re going to be angry, be angry at me! Just don’t punish them like this” He pleads.

I push him away from me.

“Don’t you get it? I never cared about you or the others. You were just toys for my entertainment. I’d never care about simple minded things like you”

I toss the crumpled up photo of us at him. My heart breaking into pieces as the photo leaves my hand.

“Take the garbage out, won’t you?”

Chanyeol’s pained expression etched into my heart I walk toward the plane. I’m going to miss this place. But it’s for the best. I order a drink and close my eyes. Back to the old me.

I stagger into the airport. People throw me dirty looks, as I walk past them. It seems I forgot how judgemental this place is. It also seems like they forgot what a wreck I am. But they’ll remember soon enough. I am Ally Hemmings, the daughter of Miranda Hemmings, one of the richest women in the country. Step-daughter of Charles Ashburn, business typhoon, the man no-one wants to make an enemy of and a class A a-hole. But most people will remember me as that drunk girl, who was in a club every single night. The girl who could barely function without drinking, the girl who was with a new guy ever night. The girl who was crude, and hated by most of the adults. None of them will ever know why I am like this. None of them ever stopped to think, why was I acting out like this? Instead they’d just give me those looks. Not even my own mother would worry, instead she’d send me to a psychologist. Or she’d buy me pills, because you can fix everything if you just throw money at it. If only I knew where my dad was, if he knew what it was like, would he come back? Would he fetch me and take me away from this hell hole? Probably not… my thoughts wander back to the night he left.

I clutch onto my father’s hand, my face stained with tears.

“Daddy! Please take me with you!” I beg over and over.

He pushes me away from him, his eyes filled with hatred. Was it because I looked like the younger version of my mother? Could he no longer look at me? Could he only see the woman who cheated on him now?

“Don’t think that I ever cared about you” He spits at me and my mother.

I look at my mother, pleading for her to do something. To stop him from leaving. But she smirks at me. Not even fazed by my father’s words.

I pull at the back of my father’s jacket as he exits the house.

“Daddy! Take me with you!” I cry, my hands almost one with his jacket.

He grabs my hair and throws me onto the ground.

“Don’t ever call me again, you are nothing to me”

That was the last words he ever said to me. I tried to talk about it to my mother but she’d only scold me. Telling me it was none of my business. You probably think I’m pathetic for acting out just because of this, but this isn’t the only reason. There’s one more thing, that no-one will ever know. The thing is, I’ve been having to fend of my stepdad as well. Unfortunately my mother married a complete ert. A man who had been making moves on me ever since I was 14. Nothing ever happened. Luckily. But that’s just because I managed to get away just in time, and also because my sister was always here to protect me.

Since she… well since she committed suicide 2 years ago, I’ve had to fend for myself. The only way I knew how was to drink, party and use narcotics.  I had no-one left who cared about me. Maybe it is my fault. Maybe I did cause all of this? If I hadn’t told my dad about the strange man visiting my mom, he might’ve never left. If I didn’t tell my sister about my stepdad, she would never have become his new victim… she would never have slit her wrists. I wouldn’t have been this screw up.

I see our old butler, Martin, holding up a sign with my name on it. Looks like I’m going home.

“Miss Ally, I’ve missed you!” He greets me, hugging me tightly.