It had been clear since a while, Hyuk’s feelings for Hongbin that is. N paced up and down the room, his mind was racing. His mother instincts, he managed a smile at the word but it pretty much summed up his hunch when it came to his kids. His instincts had let him know a year ago of these feelings and had sat down to talk to the maknae.

After lots of denying and protest the youngest had finally admitted what he felt for pretty boy. However it wasn’t so simple, Hyuk had also told N, why he would never act on these feelings. Hyuk’s experiences of relationships weren’t the most outstanding. Over tears he had confessed his first boyfriend had used him to get to his sister, after openly calling him out on being gay causing him lots of pain in school for years to come, he had broken up with him the minute she showed interest in him. And only after telling her what had happen months later his sister naturally dumped him... but the damage had been done.
The next one, had a harem of girlfriends and boyfriends, after being called the wrong name a couple times and left standing on ‘dates’ Hyuk had had a mental breakdown and tried to break up, being however young and more the shy nature, the other had easily manipulated him, saying he was being over dramatic and should feel bad.
The next one being similar and after that Hyuk had sworn that relationships were a lie and romance was just an image with no real meaning.
So N guessed that Leo and Ken’s relationship had been like a small light at the edge of Hyuk's hurt, betrayed feelings.
Hyuk knew them both well, which was why he knew that they wouldn’t hurt one another and could feel at ease, watching their relationship.

N had always assumed that the maknae had known of the Leo and Ken's relationship before everyone else, the maknae had seemed much calmer and N had seen a little bit of hope in his eyes.

Now with their current situation, N had been equally worried for the maknae as for the other two and now he had lost his youngest! That stupid flower boy, he should have sat him down when he had the chance. He groaned, a year ago as he had gotten Hyuk to speak, he had been forced to swear not to tell the person of Hyuk’s affection anything.

Suddenly, there were two arms wrapped around his mid section, stopping him from pacing up and down the floor nervously. “Earth to, Hakyeon?” Ravi asked softly, sighing N leant into the embrace, making the other smile, “Good to see a response, I felt like I was talking to a wall…” “You said something?” Ravi nodded, “Ah, I’m sorry, was thinking-“ “That’s what I was trying to tell you, do me a favor okay?” the rapper took a step back, one hand on each arm of the leader, looking him in the eye, “Close your eyes!”

Hakyeon raised an eyebrow, “How is that going to help-“ “Do it, Hakyeon!” Ravi spoke in such a stern voice, it stopped any protest that tried to escape N.

Narrowing his eyes, the leader complied.
“Good now, breathe in and out. Since Hongbin told you that Hyuk was missing, you haven’t stopped pacing through the room. So now I want to see you breathe and calm down a bit. You are our leader, we can’t have you nervously pacing and over thinking things. So breathe, and we’ll think up a plan, how does that sound?” Ravi suggested softly, N’s arms.

He was right, Hakyeon thought at the back of his head, his mind had been on fire and he hadn’t had a single rational thought. Clearing his mind he took a couple deep breathes, mind emptying, panic slowly residing.
He opened his eyes after a while, looking into Ravi’s, the rapper wearing a big reassuring smile.

“Welcome back!” N chopped him in the shoulder for the smart comment, Ravi’s smile didn’t break. N nodded he was feeling much better, “Okay let’s do this!”
Turning on his heel he marched into the living room, where he had left the culprit after high-kicking him in the chest. Hongbin sat dejected on the sofa, not even raising his head as the other two walked in. It appeared N hadn’t been the only one thinking things over.

“Leo and Ken will be here in a bit, I called them a while ago!” N announced, the only acknowledgement he got was a nod from the person on the sofa. Ravi sat down on the one man sofa opposite the couch, N following suite taking the other sofa.
“Let’s try think where Hyuk could have gone, you said you tried usual spots?” finally Hongbin looked up at the leader and nodded once again, “Them being?”
There was a pause before Hongbin started to speak, “I checked his school, the convenient store even went back to check the practice rooms…”
“Hm, N and I came straight home after the Ken went after Leo, so we know he didn’t come home… he couldn’t have gone… home home?” Ravi raised the question, looking at Hongbin, if anyone had contact to Hyuk’s family it was going to be him. The other shook his head, “I called his mom, if he goes home she promised to call me…”

There was a loud crash as the door flew open, Leo and Ken stood in the door way panting, they must have run. “We checked… the parks on our way home … in the hope he’d be there but… no chance!” Ken managed to say between gasps of air, Leo and he came inside and saw down to the group, “Any ideas?”
“First, everything good with you? We can’t start looking for the next one without having sorted out the last one!” the couple looked up, N was eyeing them, as if their body language could tell him the outcome of the incident. “Yeah, yeah, don’t worry, could he be in a special place of ours… and we talked! We can fill you in on details later!” Ken placed a hand on Leo’s shoulder, the lion nodding.
This seemed to satisfy N’s curiosity on the subject, he turned back to the matter at hand, “How about that!? A special place of yours!”
Hongbin lowered his head again, “I thought of that, really… the ice cream place, the library, I guess there are too many places…” “You idiot, a really special place not somewhere you two just happen to go often!” N snapped, making Hongbin jump a bit. “Okay, okay… I think…” “Didn’t you tell me you wanted to show Hyuk the -“

To everyone’s surprise Hongbin suddenly jumped out of his chair before Ravi could finish, and yell “I am such an idiot!” Without losing anymore time, he grabbed his jacket and ran outside the door.

Everyone else was just able to stare, he had moved so fast.
“Well, it is true… he is an idiot... ” N mumbled crossing his arms, a beep of his phone alerted everyone to a text, “ ’I’ll get him don’t worry, I’m sorry, see you later!! –Hongbin’ so flower boy knows where he is thank heavens!” One could literally see the stress roll off the leader, Ravi dutifully patted his head, whilst Ken and Leo taking this as a signal to leave to the room.
During their run home, Leo had confessed of overhearing Hyuk’s feelings for Hongbin, filling Ken in on what he knew. “So Hyuk likes Hongbin, maybe I should have seen that coming…” Ken sighed, it made so much sense, “I feel terrible for yelling at him, if only I had known…” “You can’t change it, so no use feeling bad about it…” “You’re right…” "..." "Leo, I'm sorry..." "I'm also sorry..."


Hongbin ran like he had never run before, there was truth in what Ravi had tried to say. He had promised Hyuk to see the local firework festival, however it wasn’t for another month. The only thing was he had told Hyuk of the best stop to watch the festival, he wasn’t a hundred percent sure he would find the maknae there, for all he knew he would be receiving a call from his mother. But it was worth a shot.
He had been an arse if he was honest with himself. It was a defense mechanism to laugh at Hyuk’s confession; it was too good to be true so logic had told him it couldn’t be true. Why would Hyuk feel for him romantically it seemed surreal. It had been cruel to laugh… he realized that as he heard the honesty behind the confession. What an arse he was, he thought.
He loved Hyuk, from the bottom of his heart, never had he crossed paths with someone he could always laugh with and be so comfortable around. He never had to meet any expectations and Hyuk accepted him like he was, and he...

he had laughed at his confession.

Panting, he stood on a hill a bit behind the convenient store, it only accessible from a small path, through some bushes and not many people came there, so as he saw the only other person there recognized him immediately.

Hyuk looked up in surprise at the sound of someone approaching. After crying for so long his vision was stuff fuzzy, but as he squinted at the approaching figure he jumped up in shock.
“What are you doing here?! Get awa-“
His angry cry was smothered by Hongbin, as the elder one placed both hands on either side of Hyuk’s face and pulled him in for a kiss, pulling him off balance, falling into the other.

As Hongbin pulled back, he looked down at the large eyed maknae leant against his chest. The tears in Hyuk’s eyes welled up again, was he being mocked? “Why would you…?” “I’m sorry, Hyuk!” the elder interrupted Hyuk’s question, “I shouldn’t have laughed at you… I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!!”
Hyuk blinked as the other wrapped his arms around him and buried his head into his shoulder, had he just seen Hongbin also tear up? Hongbin was crying? He felt the other shudder and something wet on his shoulder as he stood there.

Slowly, he reached up and his hyung’s back, he wasn’t too sure what was going on. He was almost certain he was going to go home, after Hongbin’s destructive response to his feelings, he only wanted to return to his family. Only on a whim had he come here, after remembering Hongbin suggest they go together to the festival, and now they were like this. He crying, Hongbin crying and not really clear on what was happening.

After a bit, Hongbin seemed to have pulled himself together a little, with a sniff he straightened up and looked Hyuk in the eye, “You scared… the living daylights out of me! Well… I was fault… I mean… after what happened sure I understand why you wouldn’t want contact but…

don’t disappear off the face of the earth like that! I was looking everywhere for you! You wouldn’t answer your phone and now it got so late! If I hadn’t found you... I just… I would have no idea what to do! You confess to me suddenly, catching me completely off guard, I thought my ears were deceiving me! That’s why my only conclusion was that you were messing with me!!

There is no excuse for my behavior… I can only apologize to you a thousand times over… I even understand if you have absolute no interest in an arse by me but since you got your confession off your chest I might as well tell you how I feel about you! Look here, Hyuk, you are the one person who doesn’t expect me to be the charming, all smiles, flower boy, with you I can be the biggest goof ball, idiot and you don’t judge me for that.
So you can leave me if you want, but I will have a huge gaping hole in my life without you, because I would be damned if I deny you have become someone very dear to me, if not someone I would like to cherish. But after what I did I have no right to ask you to like me again!
Hearing your confession was too good to be true to me, I couldn’t even fathom that you would think of me like that. “
After that rant Hongbin took a deep breath in, feeling like a weight he had been carrying around had been lifted of his shoulders that had felt good to let it out. On the other hand it only made him realize that it would only be short lived; there was no way he was going to get to live these feelings. All he would have from this was a kiss and a life lesson learnt.

Bracing himself he looked up at the younger one, Hyuk staring at him. There was a pause, the maknae staring and Hongbin nervously shift his weight from one foot to the other.
It became too much after there had been a solid five minutes of silence, Hongbin feeling worse with every passing second, finally he begged, “Hyuk…? Say something? Please”
Finally Hyuk showed a sign of life, he shook his head. Was this the rejection?
“I’m sorry… “
This was it, Hongbin thought.

“I was still kissing you in my head, didn’t quite hear anything after that… could you repeat what you said?”
Hongbin’s jaw dropped, Hyuk was wearing a small cheeky smile on his face, he wanted to what?

“Okay… from where should I start…?” he asked nervously, the maknae tilted his head in thought. “Just before the kiss, then everything goes black!” he determined, Hongbin raising an eyebrow.

Obviously, the maknae had heard every word spoken, but as much as he was feeling giddy about Hongbin's confession his hurt feelings wanted to see Hongbin suffer just a bit longer.

As the older one sighed and took his face between his hands again gently.
Hyuk thought, just let him suffer a little bit longer.
Before he felt Hongbin kissing him softly for the second time of the evening.

A/N: //shuffles awkwardly into spot light//... ... IAMTERRIBLESORRYFORTHELONGWAIT //runs away//
I was having an awful creative block and didn't want to give you anything without full determination ... forgive me //sobbing//