“Hmm, this one looks a bit like Jiyong right?” Daesung peered his eyes. Seunghyun curled his nose, frowning a bit. “Yeah, you're right, not flashy enough. Fish-Jiyong has to be unique like the real one.” he said, answering his own question. He was totally immersed in the mission of finding the others' fish-versions. Seunghyun couldn't help being a little bit annoyed. It was good he was having fun and all, but now he was focusing only on them and didn't really pay any attention to him. He was jealous, he admitted it. He was jealous towards a bunch of fishes. How pathetic.

Perhaps the fact that Daesung had completely ignored his kiss comment hadn't left him entirely unfazed. And now it was just out there, flying around them, making him awkward and insecure. He hated feeling insecure around Daesung. He was his safe haven. He was used to feeling insecure towards the rest of the world, it had always been like that and it was how it would always be. That was how he had developed his cool alter-ego T.O.P., the person he wished to be. An epically cool guy that wasn't fazed by anything, stoically conquering the world one rap at a time. His real life didn't work quite like that.

But from the first time he met Daesung, he knew he had found someone special. Even though they had taken their time opening up to each other, he had somehow been at ease around him from the very beginning. Maybe it was that smile. That uplifting everything-is-going-to-be-alright smile. It was an instant pick-me-up. He was almost convinced it had supernatural abilities. There were no other smiles in the world quite like that particular smile. He was hooked on that smile and he had no idea how to quit it, quit him. Maybe he would have to go into detox like a junkie, go cold turkey. He got goose bumps at the thought, shaking it off. No. He was going to believe it wouldn't come to that. He was going to believe this would work. It had to work.

“A panda-fish!! This is definitely Seungri, don't you think?!” Daesung asked happily, grinning proudly. Seunghyun's mood couldn't help but be uplifted. “Hmm, it could be.. I don't know why, but I get kind of a Seungri-ish vibe from this one though. You don't?” he pointed at a weird looking creature that was peeking at them from behind a rock. There was something a bit off with that particular water dweller. It was like it knew more than it was letting on. Like it knew the world's secrets and was trying to find out yours too. It was one of those beings myths and fairytales were based on.

Daesung broke into a roaring laughter. “You mean that super sneaky slimy thing that looks like it'll go snitch to the boss of the sea-underworld the second we're passed its tank? Yeah, totally!!” he held his stomach, tears coming out he was laughing so hard. Each individual sound of his laughter strummed the strings of Seunghyun's stomach, making his insides flutter. He loved being the one making him laugh, it was perhaps his favorite thing to do of all things doable in the whole wide world.

“Hey, let's take pictures of both and show him when we get back!” Daesung giggled. “Yeah, okay, get a good angle.” he instructed, not convinced that Seungri would be all that happy with his fish-versions. Daesung frowned, looking at his phone. “Can I have your phone?” he put up a shiny smile to try and blackmail him into giving it to him. Seunghyun snorted, those two really had to start getting over their awkwardness already. Although after years and years, there was little hope they would ever be at ease with each other. “Seriously, you can't even show him a picture on your phone?” Seunghyun teased, knowing full well that he would die from awkwardness trying to bring up the subject in order to show it to him.

“Knock it off, just give me your phone already!” Daesung demanded, abandoning the blackmail attempt, instead going for full extortion. “No.” Seunghyun playfully answered, crossing his arms. “Aaa.. whyyy...” he pouted, returning to the kill-him-with-cuteness strategy. “You'll break it!” Seunghyun complained, half as a joke, half for real. Daesung could be a bit of a klutz and this was a brand new model, he had only had it for a few days. Granted, he could be a klutz too. But it was his phone, if anyone would break it, it should be him.

“True, it would probably magically break at the mere touch of my fingers!” Daesung retorted, not at all happy with Seunghyun's lack of confidence in him. “But that would just serve you right for not trusting me!!” Daesung spat out, sticking his tongue out at him. “Eh, but that would just prove I shouldn't have trusted you in the first place.” he snorted, happy to have the upper hand. He took the photo before Daesung could think up a good comeback, “Now that only leaves Jiyong and Youngbae.”.

He watched Daesung watch the fishes, his eyes darting from one fish to the next in search of any similarities to either Jiyong or Youngbae. What a silly activity. And he had started it. Oh well, life needed a little silly now and then. Acting grown up was overrated. It only meant having to stop doing everything that was remotely fun and concentrate instead on utterly boring things, not being allowed to get overly excited about anything. Unless one wanted to be called childish of course, because apparently only children could get excited. It was just some ploy the bitter people, those that life had beaten down one too many times, devised so that they didn't have to watch all the happy people jumping around, getting on their nerves. He was sure of it.

Seeing the pure joy in Daesung's eyes made him vow to protect him from the depressing and limiting influences of the world. He would not let anyone dictate how he should be or how he should feel, Daesung was perfect just the way he was. He didn't want to change a thing. Or well, he would maybe be tempted to make him fall in love with him, even though if he made him, then it wouldn't be real. It had to come from Daesung's heart, not his brainwashed mind. Would he mind though, if it was only brainwashing? He wasn't sure. He knew he should mind, but it would mean Daesung could be his and that blinded his sense of righteousness. He probably wouldn't end up doing it even if he could, but he couldn't be a hundred percent sure.

How could anyone be this beautiful? He didn't often get a chance to really focus on him without any distractions, just admiring his breathtaking handsomeness. Since in most situations it would look pretty strange and creepy if he just stopped and stared at him. He didn't really care what other people thought, but he knew it would make Daesung uncomfortable so he tried to limit his sightseeing, so to speak.

How could anyone think he was ugly? He couldn't grasp what was going through those people's minds when they blatantly talked about his ugliness like it was an unequivocal fact that nobody could challenge. It hurt Seunghyun at the very core of his being every time he heard it. And Daesung believed it. He actually thought he wasn't that good looking. It made him so angry that such a radiant angel could be made to believe that he was ugly. It made him want to punch something. It really proved that the pen was mightier than the sword, words could draw blood. Tell someone something often enough and in the end that someone will start to believe it's true.

He wanted to tell him every day that he was beautiful. Tell him he was beautiful as often as others told him he was ugly, fighting fire with fire, hoping it would have a nullifying effect and let Daesung see himself as he saw him. As a truly gorgeous person, inside and out.

Where would he start? His eyebrows. His absolute favorite were his eyebrows. He would tell him how his eyebrows had the power to turn a frown upside down. And his eyes. His eyesmile could lose to no smile, there wasn't a more potent happiness drug to be found in the universe.

Although his nose was also a contender, bringing character to his face with its gentle hook and smooth lines. Not to mention the endlessly cute crinkles that formed between his eyes when he smiled the brightest. Seunghyun couldn't help giggling to himself just thinking about it.

Oh and his defined cheekbones, bringing a certain elegance to his cuteness. His lips, his kissable kissable lips. He could write a whole essay just about those amazingly heart shaped gatekeepers of his mouth, hypnotizing him with every little micro-movement. He could spend his whole life staring at those lips. And what a happy life it would be.

He also kind of had a huge thing for his teeth. Especially the front two attention seekers that couldn't wait to peek out every chance they got, charming everyone with their sassy brightness. And the way they bit his lower lip, that could literally drive Seunghyun crazy. There was nothing ier than that, nothing!

As his eyes traced the outline of Daesung's strong manly jaw, Seunghyun realized that he didn't only have it bad, he had it worse than he knew. Every single cell in his body loved Daesung, unconditionally. Daesung had somehow managed to sneak into their core and incorporate himself into his DNA, so the idea of a Seunghyun without a Daesung no longer existed. What was he going to do if this didn't work? What could he do? The only option was to see this through and hope for the best.

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A/N: Hey, you beautiful readers! :)

I wanted to let you know I just started a VIP event, a Big Bang New Year's Writing Festival and it would make me so so happy if you would check it out ♥

And even happier if you would consider participating, we need readers and writers alike *^^*

I just thought it might be a fun way to get the VIPs together and celebrate the New Year with new stories for all the different pairings :D

Please lend your support by subbing & upvoting the festival to help it gain attention and encourage people to participate ♥♥♥

(click it, click it, you know you want to kkk >.<)